第6章

"Hangit，Ibelieveeverymanintownhasanengagementtonight。

Ishallhavethedubtomyself。YouknowhowI’mlivingthiswinter，rattlingroundinthatemptyhouse。Mywifemeanttocometotowntoday，butshe’sputitoffagain，andhowisafellowtodinealoneinaroomwiththelooking-glassescovered，andnothingbutabottleofHarveysauceontheside-board？Isay，Lawrence，chuckyourengagementandtakepityonme——itgivesmethebluedevilstodinealone，andthere’snobodybutthatcantingassWetherallintheclub。"

"Sorry，Gus——Ican’tdoit。"

AsSeldenturnedaway，henoticedthedarkflushonTrenor’sface，theunpleasantmoistureofhisintenselywhiteforehead，thewayhisjewelledringswerewedgedinthecreasesofhisfatredfingers。Certainlythebeastwaspredominating——thebeastatthebottomoftheglass。Andhehadheardthisman’snamecoupledwithLily’s！Bah——thethoughtsickenedhim；allthewaybacktohisroomshewashauntedbythesightofTrenor’sfatcreasedhands——

Onhistablelaythenote:Lilyhadsentittohisrooms。Heknewwhatwasinitbeforehebroketheseal——agreysealwithBEYOND！

beneathaflyingship。Ah，hewouldtakeherbeyond——beyondtheugliness，thepettiness，theattritionandcorrosionofthesoul——

Gerty’slittlesitting-roomsparkledwithwelcomewhenSeldenenteredit。Itsmodest"effects，"compactofenamelpaintandingenuity，spoketohiminthelanguagejustthensweetesttohisear。Itissurprisinghowlittlenarrowwallsandalowceilingmatter，whentheroofofthesoulhassuddenlybeenraised。Gertysparkledtoo；oratleastshonewithatemperedradiance。Hehadneverbeforenoticedthatshehad"points"——really，somegoodfellowmightdoworse……Overthelittledinner(andhere，again，theeffectswerewonderful)hetoldhersheoughttomarry——hewasinamoodtopairoffthewholeworld。Shehadmadethecaramelcustardwithherownhands？Itwassinfultokeepsuchgiftstoherself。HereflectedwithathrobofpridethatLilycouldtrimherownhats——shehadtoldhimsothedayoftheirwalkatBellomont。

HedidnotspeakofLilytillafterdinner。Duringthelittlerepasthekeptthetalkonhishostess，who，flutteredatbeingthecentreofobservation，shoneasrosyasthecandle-shadesshehadmanufacturedfortheoccasion。Seldenevincedanextraordinaryinterestinherhouseholdarrangements:

complimentedherontheingenuitywithwhichshehadutilizedeveryinchofhersmallquarters，askedhowherservantmanagedaboutafternoonsout，learnedthatonemayimprovisedeliciousdinnersinachafing-dish，andutteredthoughtfulgeneralizationsontheburdenofalargeestablishment。

Whentheywereinthesitting-roomagain，wheretheyfittedassnuglyasbitsinapuzzle，andshehadbrewedthecoffee，andpoureditintohergrandmother’segg-shellcups，hiseye，asheleanedback，baskinginthewarmfragrance，lightedonarecentphotographofMissBart，andthedesiredtransitionwaseffectedwithoutaneffort。Thephotographwaswellenough——buttocatchherasshehadlookedlastnight！Gertyagreedwithhim——neverhadshebeensoradiant。Butcouldphotographycapturethatlight？Therehadbeenanewlookinherface——somethingdifferent；yes，Seldenagreedtherehadbeensomethingdifferent。

Thecoffeewassoexquisitethatheaskedforasecondcup:suchacontrasttothewaterystuffattheclub！Ah，yourpoorbachelorwithhisimpersonalclubfare，alternatingwiththeequallyimpersonalCUISINEofthedinner-party！Amanwholivedinlodgingsmissedthebestpartoflife——hepicturedtheflavourlesssolitudeofTrenor’srepast，andfeltamoment’scompassionfortheman……ButtoreturntoLily——andagainandagainhereturned，questioning，conjecturing，leadingGertyon，drainingherinmostthoughtsoftheirstoredtendernessforherfriend。

Atfirstshepouredherselfoutunstintingly，happyinthisperfectcommunionoftheirsympathies。HisunderstandingofLilyhelpedtoconfirmherownbeliefinherfriend。TheydwelttogetheronthefactthatLilyhadhadnochance。Gertyinstancedhergenerousimpulses——herrestlessnessanddiscontent。Thefactthatherlifehadneversatisfiedherprovedthatshewasmadeforbetterthings。Shemighthavemarriedmorethanonce——theconventionalrichmarriagewhichshehadbeentaughttoconsiderthesoleendofexistence——butwhentheopportunitycameshehadalwaysshrunkfromit。PercyGryce，forinstance，hadbeeninlovewithher——everyoneatBellomonthadsupposedthemtobeengaged，andherdismissalofhimwasthoughtinexplicable。ThisviewoftheGryceincidentchimedtoowellwithSelden’smoodnottobeinstantlyadoptedbyhim，withaflashofretrospectivecontemptforwhathadonceseemedtheobvioussolution。Ifrejectiontherehadbeen——andhewonderednowthathehadeverdoubtedit！——thenheheldthekeytothesecret，andthehillsidesofBellomontwerelitup，notwithsunset，butwithdawn。Itwashewhohadwaveredanddisownedthefaceofopportunity——andthejoynowwarminghisbreastmighthavebeenafamiliarinmateifhehadcaptureditinitsfirstflight。

Itwasatthispoint，perhaps，thatajoyjusttryingitswingsinGerty’sheartdroppedtoearthandlaystill。ShesatfacingSelden，repeatingmechanically:"No，shehasneverbeenunderstood——"andallthewhilesheherselfseemedtobesittinginthecentreofagreatglareofcomprehension。Thelittleconfidentialroom，whereamomentagotheirthoughtshadtouchedelbowsliketheirchairs，grewtounfriendlyvastness，separatingherfromSeldenbyallthelengthofhernewvisionofthefuture——andthatfuturestretchedoutinterminably，withherlonelyfiguretoilingdownit，amerespeckonthesolitude。

"Sheisherselfwithafewpeopleonly；andyouareoneofthem，"

sheheardSeldensaying。Andagain:"Begoodtoher，Gerty，won’tyou？"and:"Shehasitinhertobecomewhateversheisbelievedtobe——you’llhelpherbybelievingthebestofher？"

ThewordsbeatonGerty’sbrainlikethesoundofalanguagewhichhasseemedfamiliaratadistance，butonapproachingisfoundtobeunintelligible。HehadcometotalktoherofLily——thatwasall！Therehadbeenathirdatthefeastshehadspreadforhim，andthatthirdhadtakenherownplace。Shetriedtofollowwhathewassaying，toclingtoherownpartinthetalk——butitwasallasmeaninglessastheboomofwavesinadrowninghead，andshefelt，asthedrowningmayfeel，thattosinkwouldbenothingbesidethepainofstrugglingtokeepup。

Seldenrose，andshedrewadeepbreath，feelingthatsoonshecouldyieldtotheblessedwaves。

"Mrs。Fisher’s？Yousayshewasdiningthere？There’smusicafterward；IbelieveIhadacardfromher。"Heglancedatthefoolishpink-facedclockthatwasdrummingoutthishideoushour。"Aquarterpastten？Imightlookintherenow；theFishereveningsareamusing。Ihaven’tkeptyouuptoolate，Gerty？Youlooktired——I’verambledonandboredyou。"Andintheunwontedoverflowofhisfeelings，heleftacousinlykissuponhercheek。

AtMrs。Fisher’s，throughthecigar-smokeofthestudio，adozenvoicesgreetedSelden。Asongwaspendingasheentered，andhedroppedintoaseatnearhishostess，hiseyesroaminginsearchofMissBart。Butshewasnotthere，andthediscoverygavehimapangoutofallproportiontoitsseriousness；sincethenoteinhisbreast-pocketassuredhimthatatfourthenextdaytheywouldmeet。Tohisimpatienceitseemedimmeasurablylongtowait，andhalf-ashamedoftheimpulse，heleanedtoMrs。Fishertoask，asthemusicceased，ifMissBarthadnotdinedwithher。

"Lily？She’sjustgone。Shehadtorunoff，Iforgetwhere。

Wasn’tshewonderfullastnight？"

"Who’sthat？Lily？"askedJackStepney，fromthedepthsofaneighbouringarm-chair。"Really，youknow，I’mnoprude，butwhenitcomestoagirlstandingthereasifshewasupatauction——I

thoughtseriouslyofspeakingtocousinJulia。"

"Youdidn’tknowJackhadbecomeoursocialcensor？"Mrs。FishersaidtoSeldenwithalaugh；andStepneyspluttered，amidthegeneralderision:"Butshe’sacousin，hangit，andwhenaman’smarried——TOWNTALKwasfullofherthismorning。"

"Yes:livelyreadingthatwas，"saidMr。NedVanAlstyne，strokinghismoustachetohidethesmilebehindit。"Buythedirtysheet？No，ofcoursenot；somefellowshowedittome——butI’dheardthestoriesbefore。Whenagirl’sasgood-lookingasthatshe’dbettermarry；thennoquestionsareasked。Inourimperfectlyorganizedsocietythereisnoprovisionasyetfortheyoungwomanwhoclaimstheprivilegesofmarriagewithoutassumingitsobligations。"

"Well，IunderstandLilyisabouttoassumethemintheshapeofMr。Rosedale，"Mrs。Fishersaidwithalaugh。

"Rosedale——goodheavens！"exclaimedVanAlstyne，droppinghiseye-glass。"Stepney，that’syourfaultforfoistingthebruteonus。"

"Oh，confoundit，youknow，wedon’tMARRYRosedaleinourfamily，"Stepneylanguidlyprotested；buthiswife，whosatinoppressivebridalfineryattheothersideoftheroom，quelledhimwiththejudicialreflection:"InLily’scircumstancesit’samistaketohavetoohighastandard。"

"IhearevenRosedalehasbeenscaredbythetalklately，"Mrs。

Fisherrejoined；"butthesightofherlastnightsenthimoffhishead。WhatdoyouthinkhesaidtomeafterherTABLEAU？

’MyGod，Mrs。Fisher，ifIcouldgetPaulMorpethtopaintherlikethat，thepicture’dappreciateahundredpercentintenyears。’"

"ByJove，——butisn’tsheaboutsomewhere？"exclaimedVanAlstyne，restoringhisglasswithanuneasyglance。

"No；sheranoffwhileyouwereallmixingthepunchdownstairs。

Wherewasshegoing，bytheway？What’sontonight？Ihadn’theardofanything。"

"Oh，notaparty，Ithink，"saidaninexperiencedyoungFarishwhohadarrivedlate。"IputherinhercabasIwascomingin，andshegavethedrivertheTrenors’address。"

"TheTrenors’？"exclaimedMrs。JackStepney。"Why，thehouseisclosed——JudytelephonedmefromBellomontthisevening。"

"Didshe？That’squeer。I’msureI’mnotmistaken。Well，comenow，Trenor’sthere，anyhow——I——oh，well——thefactis，I’venoheadfornumbers，"hebrokeoff，admonishedbythenudgeofanadjoiningfoot，andthesmilethatcircledtheroom。

InitsunpleasantlightSeldenhadrisenandwasshakinghandswithhishostess。Theairoftheplacestifledhim，andhewonderedwhyhehadstayedinitsolong。

Onthedoorstephestoodstill，rememberingaphraseofLily’s:

"Itseemstomeyouspendagooddealoftimeintheelementyoudisapproveof。"

Well——whathadbroughthimtherebutthequestofher？Itwasherelement，nothis。Buthewouldliftheroutofit，takeherbeyond！ThatBEYOND！onherletterwaslikeacryforrescue。HeknewthatPerseus’staskisnotdonewhenhehasloosedAndromeda’schains，forherlimbsarenumbwithbondage，andshecannotriseandwalk，butclingstohimwithdraggingarmsashebeatsbacktolandwithhisburden。Well，hehadstrengthforboth——itwasherweaknesswhichhadputthestrengthinhim。Itwasnot，alas，acleanrushofwavestheyhadtowinthrough，butacloggingmorassofoldassociationsandhabits，andforthemomentitsvapourswereinhisthroat。Buthewouldseeclearer，breathefreerinherpresence:shewasatoncethedeadweightathisbreastandthesparwhichshouldfloatthemtosafety。Hesmiledatthewhirlofmetaphorwithwhichhewastryingtobuildupadefenceagainsttheinfluencesofthelasthour。Itwaspitiablethathe，whoknewthemixedmotivesonwhichsocialjudgmentsdepend，shouldstillfeelhimselfsoswayedbythem。HowcouldheliftLilytoafreervisionoflife，ifhisownviewofherwastobecolouredbyanymindinwhichhesawherreflected？

Themoraloppressionhadproducedaphysicalcravingforair，andhestrodeon，openinghislungstothereverberatingcoldnessofthenight。AtthecornerofFifthAvenueVanAlstynehailedhimwithanofferofcompany。

"Walking？Agoodthingtoblowthesmokeoutofone’shead。Nowthatwomenhavetakentotobaccoweliveinabathofnicotine。

Itwouldbeacuriousthingtostudytheeffectofcigarettesontherelationofthesexes。Smokeisalmostasgreatasolventasdivorce:bothtendtoobscurethemoralissue。"

NothingcouldhavebeenlessconsonantwithSelden’smoodthanVanAlstyne’safter-dinneraphorisms，butaslongasthelatterconfinedhimselftogeneralitieshislistener’snerveswereincontrol。HappilyVanAlstynepridedhimselfonhissummingupofsocialaspects，andwithSeldenforaudiencewaseagertoshowthesurenessofhistouch。Mrs。FisherlivedinanEastsidestreetnearthePark，andasthetwomenwalkeddownFifthAvenuethenewarchitecturaldevelopmentsofthatversatilethoroughfareinvitedVanAlstyne’scomment。

"ThatGreinerhouse，now——atypicalrunginthesocialladder！

ThemanwhobuiltitcamefromaMILIEUwhereallthedishesareputonthetableatonce。Hisfacadeisacompletearchitecturalmeal；ifhehadomittedastylehisfriendsmighthavethoughtthemoneyhadgivenout。NotabadpurchaseforRosedale，though:

attractsattention，andawestheWesternsight-seer。Byandbyehe’llgetoutofthatphase，andwantsomethingthatthecrowdwillpassandthefewpausebefore。Especiallyifhemarriesmyclevercousin——"

Seldendashedinwiththequery:"AndtheWellingtonBrys’？

Rathercleverofitskind，don’tyouthink？"

Theywerejustbeneaththewidewhitefacade，withitsrichrestraintofline，whichsuggestedtheclevercorsetingofaredundantfigure。

"That’sthenextstage:thedesiretoimplythatonehasbeentoEurope，andhasastandard。I’msureMrs。BrythinksherhouseacopyoftheTRIANON；inAmericaeverymarblehousewithgiltfurnitureisthoughttobeacopyoftheTRIANON。Whatacleverchapthatarchitectis，though——howhetakeshisclient’smeasure！HehasputthewholeofMrs。Bryinhisuseofthecompositeorder。NowfortheTrenors，youremember，hechosetheCorinthian:exuberant，butbasedonthebestprecedent。TheTrenorhouseisoneofhisbestthings——doesn’tlooklikeabanqueting-hallturnedinsideout。IhearMrs。Trenorwantstobuildoutanewball-room，andthatdivergencefromGusonthatpointkeepsheratBellomont。ThedimensionsoftheBrys’

ball-roommustrankle:youmaybesuresheknows’emaswellasifshe’dbeentherelastnightwithayard-measure。Whosaidshewasintown，bytheway？ThatFarishboy？Sheisn’t，Iknow；Mrs。

Stepneywasright；thehouseisdark，yousee:IsupposeGuslivesintheback。"

HehadhaltedoppositetheTrenors’comer，andSeldenperforcestayedhisstepsalso。Thehouseloomedobscureanduninhabited；

onlyanoblonggleamabovethedoorspokeofprovisionaloccupancy。

"They’veboughtthehouseattheback:itgivesthemahundredandfiftyfeetinthesidestreet。There’swheretheball-room’stobe，withagalleryconnectingit:billiard-roomandsoonabove。Isuggestedchangingtheentrance，andcarryingthedrawing-roomacrossthewholeFifthAvenuefront；youseethefrontdoorcorrespondswiththewindows——"

Thewalking-stickwhichVanAlstyneswungindemonstrationdroppedtoastartled"Hallo！"asthedooropenedandtwofigureswereseensilhouettedagainstthehall-light。Atthesamemomentahansomhaltedatthecurb-stone，andoneofthefiguresfloateddowntoitinahazeofeveningdraperies；whiletheother，blackandbulky，remainedpersistentlyprojectedagainstthelight。

Foranimmeasurablesecondthetwospectatorsoftheincidentweresilent；thenthehouse-doorclosed，thehansomrolledoff，andthewholesceneslippedbyasifwiththeturnofastereopticon。

VanAlstynedroppedhiseye-glasswithalowwhistle。

"A——hem——nothingofthis，eh，Selden？Asoneofthefamily，I

knowImaycountonyou——appearancesaredeceptive——andFifthAvenueissoimperfectlylighted——"

"Goodnight，"saidSelden，turningsharplydownthesidestreetwithoutseeingtheother’sextendedhand。

Alonewithhercousin’skiss，Gertystareduponherthoughts。Hehadkissedherbefore——butnotwithanotherwomanonhislips。Ifhehadsparedherthatshecouldhavedrownedquietly，welcomingthedarkfloodasitsubmergedher。Butnowthefloodwasshotthroughwithglory，anditwashardertodrownatsunrisethanindarkness。Gertyhidherfacefromthelight，butitpiercedtothecranniesofhersoul。Shehadbeensocontented，lifehadseemedsosimpleandsufficient——whyhadhecometotroubleherwithnewhopes？AndLily——Lily，herbestfriend！Woman-like，sheaccusedthewoman。Perhaps，haditnotbeenforLily，herfondimaginingmighthavebecometruth。Seldenhadalwayslikedher——hadunderstoodandsympathizedwiththemodestindependenceofherlife。He，whohadthereputationofweighingallthingsinthenicebalanceoffastidiousperceptions，hadbeenuncriticalandsimpleinhisviewofher:hisclevernesshadneveroverawedherbecauseshehadfeltathomeinhisheart。Andnowshewasthrustout，andthedoorbarredagainstherbyLily’shand！Lily，forwhoseadmissiontheresheherselfhadpleaded！Thesituationwaslightedupbyadrearyflashofirony。SheknewSelden——shesawhowtheforceofherfaithinLilymusthavehelpedtodispelhishesitations。Sheremembered，too，howLilyhadtalkedofhim-shesawherselfbringingthetwotogether，makingthemknowntoeachother。OnSelden’spart，nodoubt，thewoundinflictedwasinconscient；hehadneverguessedherfoolishsecret；butLily——Lilymusthaveknown！When，insuchmatters，areawoman’sperceptionsatfault？Andifsheknew，thenshehaddeliberatelydespoiledherfriend，andinmerewantonnessofpower，since，eventoGerty’ssuddenlyflamingjealousy，itseemedincrediblethatLilyshouldwishtobeSelden’swife。Lilymightbeincapableofmarryingformoney，butshewasequallyincapableoflivingwithoutit，andSelden’seagerinvestigationsintothesmalleconomiesofhouse-keepingmadehimappeartoGertyastragicallydupedasherself。

Sheremainedlonginhersitting-room，wheretheemberswerecrumblingtocoldgrey，andthelamppaledunderitsgayshade。

JustbeneathitstoodthephotographofLilyBart，lookingoutimperiallyonthecheapgim-cracks，thecrampedfurnitureofthelittleroom。CouldSeldenpictureherinsuchaninterior？Gertyfeltthepoverty，theinsignificanceofhersurroundings:shebeheldherlifeasitmustappeartoLily。AndthecrueltyofLily’sjudgmentssmoteuponhermemory。Shesawthatshehaddressedheridolwithattributesofherownmaking。WhenhadLilyeverreallyfelt，orpitied，orunderstood？Allshewantedwasthetasteofnewexperiences:sheseemedlikesomecruelcreatureexperimentinginalaboratory。

Thepink-facedclockdrummedoutanotherhour，andGertyrosewithastart。ShehadanappointmentearlythenextmorningwithadistrictvisitorontheEastside。Sheputoutherlamp，coveredthefire，andwentintoherbedroomtoundress。Inthelittleglassaboveherdressing-tableshesawherfacereflectedagainsttheshadowsoftheroom，andtearsblottedthereflection。Whatrighthadshetodreamthedreamsofloveliness？

Adullfaceinvitedadullfate。Shecriedquietlyassheundressed，layingasideherclotheswithherhabitualprecision，settingeverythinginorderforthenextday，whentheoldlifemustbetakenupasthoughtherehadbeennobreakinitsroutine。Herservantdidnotcometilleighto’clock，andshepreparedherowntea-trayandplaceditbesidethebed。Thenshelockedthedooroftheflat，extinguishedherlightandlaydown。

Butonherbedsleepwouldnotcome，andshelayfacetofacewiththefactthatshehatedLilyBart。Itclosedwithherinthedarknesslikesomeformlesseviltobeblindlygrappledwith。

Reason，judgment，renunciation，allthesanedaylightforces，werebeatenbackinthesharpstruggleforself-preservation。Shewantedhappiness——wanteditasfiercelyandunscrupulouslyasLilydid，butwithoutLily’spowerofobtainingit。Andinherconsciousimpotenceshelayshivering，andhatedherfriend——

Aringatthedoor-bellcaughthertoherfeet。Shestruckalightandstoodstartled，listening。Foramomentherheartbeatincoherently，thenshefeltthesoberingtouchoffact，andrememberedthatsuchcallswerenotunknowninhercharitablework。Sheflungonherdressing-gowntoanswerthesummons，andunlockingherdoor，confrontedtheshiningvisionofLilyBart。

Gerty’sfirstmovementwasoneofrevulsion。SheshrankbackasthoughLily’spresenceflashedtoosuddenalightuponhermisery。Thensheheardhernameinacry，hadaglimpseofherfriend’sface，andfeltherselfcaughtandclungto。

"Lily——whatisit？"sheexclaimed。

MissBartreleasedher，andstoodbreathingbrokenly，likeonewhohasgainedshelterafteralongflight。

"Iwassocold——Icouldn’tgohome。Haveyouafire？"

Gerty’scompassionateinstincts，respondingtotheswiftcallofhabit，sweptasideallherreluctances。Lilywassimplysomeonewhoneededhelp——forwhatreason，therewasnotimetopauseandconjecture:disciplinedsympathycheckedthewonderonGerty’slips，andmadeherdrawherfriendsilentlyintothesitting-roomandseatherbythedarkenedhearth。

"Thereiskindlingwoodhere:thefirewillburninaminute。"

Shekneltdown，andtheflameleaptunderherrapidhands。Itflashedstrangelythroughthetearswhichstillblurredhereyes，andsmoteonthewhiteruinofLily’sface。Thegirlslookedateachotherinsilence；thenLilyrepeated:"Icouldn’tgohome。"

"No——no——youcamehere，dear！You’recoldandtired——sitquiet，andI’llmakeyousometea。"

Gertyhadunconsciouslyadoptedthesoothingnoteofhertrade:

allpersonalfeelingwasmergedinthesenseofministry，andexperiencehadtaughtherthatthebleedingmustbestayedbeforethewoundisprobed。

Lilysatquiet，leaningtothefire:theclatterofcupsbehindhersoothedherasfamiliarnoiseshushachildwhomsilencehaskeptwakeful。ButwhenGertystoodathersidewiththeteashepusheditaway，andturnedanestrangedeyeonthefamiliarroom。

"IcameherebecauseIcouldn’tbeartobealone，"shesaid。

Gertysetdownthecupandkneltbesideher。

"Lily！Somethinghashappened——can’tyoutellme？"

"Icouldn’tbeartolieawakeinmyroomtillmorning。IhatemyroomatAuntJulia’s——soIcamehere——"

Shestirredsuddenly，brokefromherapathy，anddungtoGertyinafreshburstoffear。

"Oh，Gerty，thefuries……youknowthenoiseoftheirwings——alone，atnight，inthedark？Butyoudon’tknow——thereisnothingtomakethedarkdreadfultoyou——"

Thewords，flashingbackonGerty’slasthours，struckfromherafaintderisivemurmur；butLily，intheblazeofherownmisery，wasblindedtoeverythingoutsideit。

"You’llletmestay？Ishan’tmindwhendaylightcomes——Isitlate？Isthenightnearlyover？Itmustbeawfultobesleepless——everythingstandsbythebedandstares——"

MissFarishcaughtherstrayinghands。"Lily，lookatme！

Somethinghashappened——anaccident？Youhavebeenfrightened——whathasfrightenedyou？Tellmeifyoucan——awordortwo——sothatIcanhelpyou。"

Lilyshookherhead。

"Iamnotfrightened:that’snottheword。Canyouimaginelookingintoyourglasssomemorningandseeingadisfigurement——somehideouschangethathascometoyouwhileyouslept？Well，Iseemtomyselflikethat——Ican’tbeartoseemyselfinmyownthoughts——Ihateugliness，youknow——I’vealwaysturnedfromit——butIcan’texplaintoyou——youwouldn’tunderstand。"

Sheliftedherheadandhereyesfellontheclock。

"Howlongthenightis！AndIknowIshan’tsleeptomorrow。Someonetoldmemyfatherusedtoliesleeplessandthinkofhorrors。

Andhewasnotwicked，onlyunfortunate——andIseenowhowhemusthavesuffered，lyingalonewithhisthoughts！ButIambad——abadgirl——allmythoughtsarebad——Ihavealwayshadbadpeopleaboutme。Isthatanyexcuse？IthoughtIcouldmanagemyownlife——Iwasproud——proud！butnowI’montheirlevel——"

Sobsshookher，andshebowedtothemlikeatreeinadrystorm。

Gertykneltbesideher，waiting，withthepatiencebornofexperience，tillthisgustofmiseryshouldloosenfreshspeech。

Shehadfirstimaginedsomephysicalshock，someperilofthecrowdedstreets，sinceLilywaspresumablyonherwayhomefromCarryFisher’s；butshenowsawthatothernerve-centresweresmitten，andhermindtrembledbackfromconjecture。

Lily’ssobsceased，andsheliftedherhead。

"Therearebadgirlsinyourslums。Tellme——dotheyeverpickthemselvesup？Everforget，andfeelastheydidbefore？"

"Lily！youmustn’tspeakso——you’redreaming。"

"Don’ttheyalwaysgofrombadtoworse？There’snoturningback——youroldselfrejectsyou，andshutsyouout。"

Sherose，stretchingherarmsasifinutterphysicalweariness。

"Gotobed，dear！Youworkhardandgetupearly。I’llwatchherebythefire，andyou’llleavethelight，andyourdooropen。AllIwantistofeelthatyouarenearme。"ShelaidbothhandsonGerty’sshoulders，withasmilethatwaslikesunriseonaseastrewnwithwreckage。

"Ican’tleaveyou，Lily。Comeandlieonmybed。Yourhandsarefrozen——youmustundressandbemadewarm。"Gertypausedwithsuddencompunction。"ButMrs。Peniston——it’spastmidnight！Whatwillshethink？"

"Shegoestobed。Ihavealatch-key。Itdoesn’tmatter——Ican’tgobackthere。"

"There’snoneedto:youshallstayhere。Butyoumusttellmewhereyouhavebeen。Listen，Lily——itwillhelpyoutospeak！"

SheregainedMissBart’shands，andpressedthemagainsther。

"Trytotellme——itwillclearyourpoorhead。Listen——youwerediningatCarryFisher’s。"Gertypausedandaddedwithaflashofheroism:"LawrenceSeldenwentfromheretofindyou。"

Attheword，Lily’sfacemeltedfromlockedanguishtotheopenmiseryofachild。Herlipstrembledandhergazewidenedwithtears。

"Hewenttofindme？AndImissedhim！Oh，Gerty，hetriedtohelpme。Hetoldme——hewarnedmelongago——heforesawthatIshouldgrowhatefultomyself！"

Thename，asGertysawwithaclutchattheheart，hadloosenedthespringsofself-pityinherfriend’sdrybreast，andtearbytearLilypouredoutthemeasureofheranguish。ShehaddroppedsidewaysinGerty’sbigarm-chair，herheadburiedwherelatelySelden’shadleaned，inabeautyofabandonmentthatdrovehometoGerty’sachingsensestheinevitablenessofherowndefeat。

Ah，itneedednodeliberatepurposeonLily’sparttorobherofherdream！Tolookonthatpronelovelinesswastoseeinitanaturalforce，torecognizethatloveandpowerbelongtosuchasLily，asrenunciationandservicearethelotofthosetheydespoil。ButifSelden’sinfatuationseemedafatalnecessity，theeffectthathisnameproducedshookGerty’ssteadfastnesswithalastpang。Menpassthroughsuchsuperhumanlovesandoutlivethem:theyaretheprobationsubduingthehearttohumanjoys。HowgladlyGertywouldhavewelcomedtheministryofhealing:howwillinglyhavesoothedthesuffererbacktotoleranceoflife！ButLily’sself-betrayaltookthislasthopefromher。Themortalmaidontheshoreishelplessagainstthesirenwholovesherprey:suchvictimsarefloatedbackdeadfromtheiradventure。

Lilysprangupandcaughtherwithstronghands。"Gerty，youknowhim——youunderstandhim——tellme；ifIwenttohim，ifItoldhimeverything——ifIsaid:’Iambadthroughandthrough——Iwantadmiration，Iwantexcitement，Iwantmoney——’yes，MONEY！

That’smyshame，Gerty——andit’sknown，it’ssaidofme——it’swhatmenthinkofme——IfIsaiditalltohim——toldhimthewholestory——saidplainly:’I’vesunklowerthanthelowest，forI’vetakenwhattheytake，andnotpaidastheypay’——oh，Gerty，youknowhim，youcanspeakforhim:ifItoldhimeverythingwouldheloatheme？Orwouldhepityme，andunderstandme，andsavemefromloathingmyself？"

Gertystoodcoldandpassive。Sheknewthehourofherprobationhadcome，andherpoorheartbeatwildlyagainstitsdestiny。Asadarkriversweepsbyunderalightningflash，shesawherchanceofhappinesssurgepastunderaflashoftemptation。Whatpreventedherfromsaying:"Heislikeothermen"？Shewasnotsosureofhim，afterall！Buttodosowouldhavebeenlikeblasphemingherlove。Shecouldnotputhimbeforeherselfinanylightbutthenoblest:shemusttrusthimtotheheightofherownpassion。

"Yes:Iknowhim；hewillhelpyou，"shesaid；andinamomentLily’spassionwasweepingitselfoutagainstherbreast。

Therewasbutonebedinthelittleflat，andthetwogirlslaydownonitsidebysidewhenGertyhadunlacedLily’sdressandpersuadedhertoputherlipstothewarmtea。Thelightextinguished，theylaystillinthedarkness，Gertyshrinkingtotheouteredgeofthenarrowcouchtoavoidcontactwithherbed-fellow。KnowingthatLilydislikedtobecaressed，shehadlongagolearnedtocheckherdemonstrativeimpulsestowardherfriend。ButtonighteveryfibreinherbodyshrankfromLily’snearness:itwastorturetolistentoherbreathing，andfeelthesheetstirwithit。AsLilyturned，andsettledtocompleterrest，astrandofherhairsweptGerty’scheekwithitsfragrance。Everythingaboutherwaswarmandsoftandscented:

eventhestainsofhergriefbecameherasrain-dropsdothebeatenrose。ButasGertylaywitharmsdrawndownherside，inthemotionlessnarrownessofaneffigy，shefeltastirofsobsfromthebreathingwarmthbesideher，andLilyflungoutherhand，gropedforherfriend’s，andhelditfast。

"Holdme，Gerty，holdme，orIshallthinkofthings，"shemoaned；andGertysilentlyslippedanarmunderher，pillowingherheadinitshollowasamothermakesanestforatossingchild。InthewarmhollowLilylaystillandherbreathinggrewlowandregular。HerhandstilldungtoGerty’sasiftowardoffevildreams，buttheholdofherfingersrelaxed，herheadsankdeeperintoitsshelter，andGertyfeltthatsheslept。

Whenlilywokeshehadthebedtoherself，andthewinterlightwasintheroom。

Shesatup，bewilderedbythestrangenessofhersurroundings；

thenmemoryreturned，andshelookedaboutherwithashiver。Inthecoldslantoflightreflectedfromthebackwallofaneighbouringbuilding，shesawhereveningdressandoperacloaklyinginatawdryheaponachair。Finerylaidoffisasunappetizingastheremainsofafeast，anditoccurredtoLilythat，athome，hermaid’svigilancehadalwayssparedherthesightofsuchincongruities。Herbodyachedwithfatigue，andwiththeconstrictionofherattitudeinGerty’sbed。Allthroughhertroubledsleepshehadbeenconsciousofhavingnospacetotossin，andthelongefforttoremainmotionlessmadeherfeelasifshehadspenthernightinatrain。

Thissenseofphysicaldiscomfortwasthefirsttoassertitself；

thensheperceived，beneathit，acorrespondingmentalprostration，alanguorofhorrormoreinsufferablethanthefirstrushofherdisgust。Thethoughtofhavingtowakeeverymorningwiththisweightonherbreastrousedhertiredmindtofresheffort。Shemustfindsomewayoutofthesloughintowhichshehadstumbled:itwasnotsomuchcompunctionasthedreadofhermorningthoughtsthatpressedonhertheneedofaction。Butshewasunutterablytired；itwaswearinesstothinkconnectedly。Shelayback，lookingaboutthepoorslitofaroomwitharenewalofphysicaldistaste。Theouterair，pennedbetweenhighbuildings，broughtnofreshnessthroughthewindow；steam-heatwasbeginningtosinginacoilofdingypipes，andasmellofcookingpenetratedthecrackofthedoor。

Thedooropened，andGerty，dressedandhatted，enteredwithacupoftea。Herfacelookedsallowandswolleninthedrearylight，andherdullhairshadedimperceptiblyintothetonesofherskin。

SheglancedshylyatLily，askinginanembarrassedtonehowshefelt；Lilyansweredwiththesameconstraint，andraisedherselfuptodrinkthetea。

"Imusthavebeenover-tiredlastnight；IthinkIhadanervousattackinthecarriage，"shesaid，asthedrinkbroughtclearnesstohersluggishthoughts。

"Youwerenotwell；Iamsogladyoucamehere，"Gertyreturned。

"ButhowamItogethome？AndAuntJulia——？"

"Sheknows；Itelephonedearly，andyourmaidhasbroughtyourthings。Butwon’tyoueatsomething？Iscrambledtheeggsmyself。"

Lilycouldnoteat；buttheteastrengthenedhertoriseanddressunderhermaid’ssearchinggaze。ItwasarelieftoherthatGertywasobligedtohastenaway:thetwokissedsilently，butwithoutatraceofthepreviousnight’semotion。

LilyfoundMrs。Penistoninastateofagitation。ShehadsentforGraceStepneyandwastakingdigitalis。Lilybreastedthestormofenquiriesasbestshecould，explainingthatshehadhadanattackoffaintnessonherwaybackfromCarryFisher’s；that，fearingshewouldnothavestrengthtoreachhome，shehadgonetoMissFarish’sinstead；butthataquietnighthadrestoredher，andthatshehadnoneedofadoctor。

ThiswasarelieftoMrs。Peniston，whocouldgiveherselfuptoherownsymptoms，andLilywasadvisedtogoandliedown，heraunt’spanaceaforallphysicalandmoraldisorders。Inthesolitudeofherownroomshewasbroughtbacktoasharpcontemplationoffacts。Herdaylightviewofthemnecessarilydifferedfromthecloudyvisionofthenight。Thewingedfurieswerenowprowlinggossipswhodroppedinoneachotherfortea。

Butherfearsseemedtheuglier，thusshornoftheirvagueness；

andbesides，shehadtoact，notrave。ForthefirsttimesheforcedherselftoreckonuptheexactamountofherdebttoTrenor；andtheresultofthishatefulcomputationwasthediscoverythatshehad，inall，receivedninethousanddollarsfromhim。Theflimsypretextonwhichithadbeengivenandreceivedshrivelledupintheblazeofhershame:sheknewthatnotapennyofitwasherown，andthattorestoreherself-respectshemustatoncerepaythewholeamount。Theinabilitythustosolaceheroutragedfeelingsgaveheraparalyzingsenseofinsignificance。Shewasrealizingforthefirsttimethatawoman’sdignitymaycostmoretokeepupthanhercarriage；andthatthemaintenanceofamoralattributeshouldbedependentondollarsandcents，madetheworldappearamoresordidplacethanshehadconceivedit。

Afterluncheon，whenGraceStepney’spryingeyeshadbeenremoved，Lilyaskedforawordwithheraunt。Thetwoladieswentupstairstothesitting-room，whereMrs。Penistonseatedherselfinherblacksatinarm-chairtuftedwithyellowbuttons，besideabead-worktablebearingabronzeboxwithaminiatureofBeatriceCenciinthelid。Lilyfeltfortheseobjectsthesamedistastewhichtheprisonermayentertainforthefittingsofthecourt-room。Itwasherethatherauntreceivedherrareconfidences，andthepink-eyedsmirkoftheturbanedBeatricewasassociatedinhermindwiththegradualfadingofthesmilefromMrs。Peniston’slips。Thatlady’sdreadofascenegaveheraninexorablenesswhichthegreateststrengthofcharactercouldnothaveproduced，sinceitwasindependentofallconsiderationsofrightorwrong；andknowingthis，Lilyseldomventuredtoassailit。Shehadneverfeltlesslikemakingtheattemptthanonthepresentoccasion；butshehadsoughtinvainforanyothermeansofescapefromanintolerablesituation。

Mrs。Penistonexaminedhercritically。"You’reabadcolour，Lily:thisincessantrushingaboutisbeginningtotellonyou，"

shesaid。

MissBartsawanopening。"Idon’tthinkit’sthat，AuntJulia；

I’vehadworries，"shereplied。

"Ah，"saidMrs。Peniston，shuttingherlipswiththesnapofapurseclosingagainstabeggar。

"I’msorrytobotheryouwiththem，"Lilycontinued，"butI

reallybelievemyfaintnesslastnightwasbroughtonpartlybyanxiousthoughts——"

"IshouldhavesaidCarryFisher’scookwasenoughtoaccountforit。ShehasawomanwhowaswithMariaMelsonin1891——thespringoftheyearwewenttoAix——andIrememberdiningtheretwodaysbeforewesailed，andfeelingSUREthecoppershadn’tbeenscoured。"

"Idon’tthinkIatemuch；Ican’teatorsleep。"Lilypaused，andthensaidabruptly:"Thefactis，AuntJulia，Iowesomemoney。"

Mrs。Peniston’sfacecloudedperceptibly，butdidnotexpresstheastonishmentherniecehadexpected。Shewassilent，andLilywasforcedtocontinue:"Ihavebeenfoolish——"

"Nodoubtyouhave:extremelyfoolish，"Mrs。Penistoninterposed。

"Ifailtoseehowanyonewithyourincome，andnoexpenses——nottomentionthehandsomepresentsI’vealwaysgivenyou——"

"Oh，you’vebeenmostgenerous，AuntJulia；Ishallneverforgetyourkindness。Butperhapsyoudon’tquiterealizetheexpenseagirlisputtonowadays——"

"Idon’trealizethatYOUareputtoanyexpenseexceptforyourclothesandyourrailwayfares。Iexpectyoutobehandsomelydressed；butIpaidCeleste’sbillforyoulastOctober。"

Lilyhesitated:heraunt’simplacablememoryhadneverbeenmoreinconvenient。"Youwereaskindaspossible；butIhavehadtogetafewthingssince——"

"Whatkindofthings？Clothes？Howmuchhaveyouspent？Letmeseethebill——Idaresaythewomanisswindlingyou。"

"Oh，no，Ithinknot:clotheshavegrownsofrightfullyexpensive；andoneneedssomanydifferentkinds，withcountryvisits，andgolfandskating，andAikenandTuxedo——"

"Letmeseethebill，"Mrs。Penistonrepeated。

Lilyhesitatedagain。Inthefirstplace，Mme。Celestehadnotyetsentinheraccount，andsecondly，theamountitrepresentedwasonlyafractionofthesumthatLilyneeded。

"Shehasn’tsentinthebillformywinterthings，butIKNOW

it’slarge；andthereareoneortwootherthings；I’vebeencarelessandimprudent——I’mfrightenedtothinkofwhatIowe——"

SheraisedthetroubledlovelinessofherfacetoMrs。Peniston，vainlyhopingthatasightsomovingtotheothersexmightnotbewithouteffectuponherown。ButtheeffectproducedwasthatofmakingMrs。Penistonshrinkbackapprehensively。

"Really，Lily，youareoldenoughtomanageyourownaffairs，andafterfrighteningmetodeathbyyourperformanceoflastnightyoumightatleastchooseabettertimetoworrymewithsuchmatters。"Mrs。Penistonglancedattheclock，andswallowedatabletofdigitalis。"IfyouoweCelesteanotherthousand，shemaysendmeheraccount，"sheadded，asthoughtoendthediscussionatanycost。

"Iamverysorry，AuntJulia；Ihatetotroubleyouatsuchatime；butIhavereallynochoice——Ioughttohavespokensooner——Ioweagreatdealmorethanathousanddollars。"

"Agreatdealmore？Doyouowetwo？Shemusthaverobbedyou！"

"ItoldyouitwasnotonlyCeleste。I——thereareotherbills——morepressing——thatmustbesettled。"

"Whatonearthhaveyoubeenbuying？Jewelry？Youmusthavegoneoffyourhead，"saidMrs。Penistonwithasperity。"Butifyouhaverunintodebt，youmustsuffertheconsequences，andputasideyourmonthlyincometillyourbillsarepaid。Ifyoustayquietlyhereuntilnextspring，insteadofracingaboutalloverthecountry，youwillhavenoexpensesatall，andsurelyinfourorfivemonthsyoucansettletherestofyourbillsifIpaythedress-makernow。"

Lilywasagainsilent。SheknewshecouldnothopetoextractevenathousanddollarsfromMrs。PenistononthemerepleaofpayingCeleste’sbill:Mrs。Penistonwouldexpecttogooverthedress-maker’saccount，andwouldmakeoutthechequetoherandnottoLily。Andyetthemoneymustbeobtainedbeforethedaywasover！

"ThedebtsIspeakofare——different——notliketradesmen’sbills，"shebeganconfusedly；butMrs。Peniston’slookmadeheralmostafraidtocontinue。Coulditbethatherauntsuspectedanything？TheideaprecipitatedLily’savowal。

"Thefactis，I’veplayedcardsagooddeal——bridge；thewomenalldoit；girlstoo——it’sexpected。SometimesI’vewon——wonagooddeal——butlatelyI’vebeenunlucky——andofcoursesuchdebtscan’tbepaidoffgradually——"

Shepaused:Mrs。Peniston’sfaceseemedtobepetrifyingasshelistened。

"Cards——you’veplayedcardsformoney？It’strue，then:whenI

wastoldsoIwouldn’tbelieveit。Iwon’taskiftheotherhorrorsIwastoldweretruetoo；I’veheardenoughforthestateofmynerves。WhenIthinkoftheexampleyou’vehadinthishouse！ButIsupposeit’syourforeignbringing-up——nooneknewwhereyourmotherpickedupherfriends。AndherSundayswereascandal——thatIknow。"

Mrs。Penistonwheeledroundsuddenly。"YouplaycardsonSunday？"

LilyflushedwiththerecollectionofcertainrainySundaysatBellomontandwiththeDorsets。

"You’rehardonme，AuntJulia:Ihaveneverreallycaredforcards，butagirlhatestobethoughtpriggishandsuperior，andonedriftsintodoingwhattheothersdo。I’vehadadreadfullesson，andifyou’llhelpmeoutthistimeIpromiseyou——"

Mrs。Penistonraisedherhandwarningly。"Youneedn’tmakeanypromises:it’sunnecessary。WhenIofferedyouahomeIdidn’tundertaketopayyourgamblingdebts。"

"AuntJulia！Youdon’tmeanthatyouwon’thelpme？"

"IshallcertainlynotdoanythingtogivetheimpressionthatI

countenanceyourbehaviour。Ifyoureallyoweyourdress-maker，I

willsettlewithher——beyondthatIrecognizenoobligationtoassumeyourdebts。"

Lilyhadrisen，andstoodpaleandquiveringbeforeheraunt。

Pridestormedinher，buthumiliationforcedthecryfromherlips:"AuntJulia，Ishallbedisgraced——I——"Butshecouldgonofarther。Ifherauntturnedsuchastonyeartothefictionofthegamblingdebts，inwhatspiritwouldshereceivetheterribleavowalofthetruth？

"IconsiderthatyouAREdisgraced，Lily:disgracedbyyourconductfarmorethanbyitsresults。Yousayyourfriendshavepersuadedyoutoplaycardswiththem；well，theymayaswelllearnalessontoo。Theycanprobablyaffordtolosealittlemoney——andatanyrate，Iamnotgoingtowasteanyofmineinpayingthem。AndnowImustaskyoutoleaveme——thisscenehasbeenextremelypainful，andIhavemyownhealthtoconsider。

Drawdowntheblinds，please；andtellJenningsIwillseenoonethisafternoonbutGraceStepney。"

Lilywentuptoherownroomandboltedthedoor。Shewastremblingwithfearandanger——therushofthefuries’wingswasinherears。Shewalkedupanddowntheroomwithblindirregularsteps。Thelastdoorofescapewasclosed——shefeltherselfshutinwithherdishonourSuddenlyherwildpacingbroughtherbeforetheclockonthechimney-piece。Itshandsstoodathalf-pastthree，andsherememberedthatSeldenwastocometoheratfour。Shehadmeanttoputhimoffwithaword——butnowherheartleapedatthethoughtofseeinghim。Wastherenotapromiseofrescueinhislove？AsshehadlainatGerty’ssidethenightbefore，shehadthoughtofhiscoming，andofthesweetnessofweepingoutherpainuponhisbreast。Ofcourseshehadmeanttoclearherselfofitsconsequencesbeforeshemethim——shehadneverreallydoubtedthatMrs。Penistonwouldcometoheraid。Andshehadfelt，eveninthefullstormofhermisery，thatSelden’slovecouldnotbeherultimaterefuge；onlyitwouldbesosweettotakeamoment’sshelterthere，whileshegatheredfreshstrengthtogoon。

Butnowhislovewasheronlyhope，andasshesatalonewithherwretchednessthethoughtofconfidinginhimbecameasseductiveastheriver’sflowtothesuicide。Thefirstplungewouldbeterrible——butafterward，whatblessednessmightcome！SherememberedGerty’swords:"Iknowhim——hewillhelpyou"；andhermindclungtothemasasickpersonmightclingtoahealingrelic。Oh，ifhereallyunderstood——ifhewouldhelphertogatherupherbrokenlife，andputittogetherinsomenewsemblanceinwhichnotraceofthepastshouldremain！Hehadalwaysmadeherfeelthatshewasworthyofbetterthings，andshehadneverbeeningreaterneedofsuchsolace。Onceandagainsheshrankatthethoughtofimperillinghislovebyherconfession:forlovewaswhatsheneeded——itwouldtaketheglowofpassiontoweldtogethertheshatteredfragmentsofherself-esteem。ButsherecurredtoGerty’swordsandheldfasttothem。ShewassurethatGertyknewSelden’sfeelingforher，andithadneverdawneduponherblindnessthatGerty’sownjudgmentofhimwascolouredbyemotionsfarmoreardentthanherown。

Fouro’clockfoundherinthedrawing-room:shewassurethatSeldenwouldbepunctual。Butthehourcameandpassed——itmovedonfeverishly，measuredbyherimpatientheart-beats。Shehadtimetotakeafreshsurveyofherwretchedness，andtofluctuateanewbetweentheimpulsetoconfideinSeldenandthedreadofdestroyinghisillusions。Butastheminutespassedtheneedofthrowingherselfonhiscomprehensionbecamemoreurgent:shecouldnotbeartheweightofhermiseryalone。Therewouldbeaperilousmoment，perhaps:butcouldshenottrusttoherbeautytobridgeitover，tolandhersafeintheshelterofhisdevotion？

ButthehourspedonandSeldendidnotcome。Doubtlesshehadbeendetained，orhadmisreadherhurriedlyscrawlednote，takingthefourforafive。Theringingofthedoor-bellafewminutesafterfiveconfirmedthissupposition，andmadeLilyhastilyresolvetowritemorelegiblyinfuture。Thesoundofstepsinthehall，andofthebutler’svoiceprecedingthem，pouredfreshenergyintoherveins。Shefeltherselfoncemorethealertandcompetentmoulderofemergencies，andtheremembranceofherpoweroverSeldenflushedherwithsuddenconfidence。Butwhenthedrawing-roomdooropeneditwasRosedalewhocamein。

Thereactioncausedherasharppang，butafterapassingmovementofirritationattheclumsinessoffate，andatherowncarelessnessinnotdenyingthedoortoallbutSelden，shecontrolledherselfandgreetedRosedaleamicably。ItwasannoyingthatSelden，whenhecame，shouldfindthatparticularvisitorinpossession，butLilywasmistressoftheartofriddingherselfofsuperfluouscompany，andtoherpresentmoodRosedaleseemeddistinctlynegligible。

Hisownviewofthesituationforceditselfuponherafterafewmoments’conversation。ShehadcaughtattheBrys’entertainmentasaneasyimpersonalsubject，likelytotidethemovertheintervaltillSeldenappeared，butMr。Rosedale，tenaciouslyplantedbesidethetea-table，hishandsinhispockets，hislegsalittletoofreelyextended，atoncegavethetopicapersonalturn。

"Prettywelldone——well，yes，Isupposeitwas:WellyBry’sgothisbackupanddon’tmeantoletgotillhe’sgotthehangofthething。Ofcourse，therewerethingshereandthere——thingsMrs。Fishercouldn’tbeexpectedtoseeto——thechampagnewasn’tcold，andthecoatsgotmixedinthecoat-room。Iwouldhavespentmoremoneyonthemusic。Butthat’smycharacter:ifIwantathingI’mwillingtopay:Idon’tgouptothecounter，andthenwonderifthearticle’sworththeprice。Iwouldn’tbesatisfiedtoentertainliketheWellyBrys；I’dwantsomethingthatwouldlookmoreeasyandnatural，moreasifItookitinmystride。Andittakesjusttwothingstodothat，MissBart:money，andtherightwomantospendit。"

Hepaused，andexaminedherattentivelywhilesheaffectedtorearrangethetea-cups。

"I’vegotthemoney，"hecontinued，clearinghisthroat，"andwhatIwantisthewoman——andImeantohavehertoo。"

Heleanedforwardalittle，restinghishandsontheheadofhiswalking-stick。HehadseenmenofNedVanAlstyne’stypebringtheirhatsandsticksintoadrawing-room，andhethoughtitaddedatouchofelegantfamiliaritytotheirappearance。

Lilywassilent，smilingfaintly，withhereyesabsentlyrestingonhisface。Shewasinrealityreflectingthatadeclarationwouldtakesometimetomake，andthatSeldenmustsurelyappearbeforethemomentofrefusalhadbeenreached。Herbroodinglook，asofamindwithdrawnyetnotaverted，seemedtoMr。Rosedalefullofasubtleencouragement。Hewouldnothavelikedanyevidenceofeagerness。

"Imeantohavehertoo，"herepeated，withalaughintendedtostrengthenhisself-assurance。"IgenerallyHAVEgotwhatI

wantedinlife，MissBart。Iwantedmoney，andI’vegotmorethanIknowhowtoinvest；andnowthemoneydoesn’tseemtobeofanyaccountunlessIcanspenditontherightwoman。That’swhatI

wanttodowithit:Iwantmywifetomakealltheotherwomenfeelsmall。I’dnevergrudgeadollarthatwasspentonthat。Butitisn’teverywomancandoit，nomatterhowmuchyouspendonher。Therewasagirlinsomehistorybookwhowantedgoldshields，orsomething，andthefellowsthrew’emather，andshewascrushedunder’em:theykilledher。Well，that’strueenough:

somewomenlookedburiedundertheirjewelry。WhatIwantisawomanwho’llholdherheadhigherthemorediamondsIputonit。

AndwhenIlookedatyoutheothernightattheBrys’，inthatplainwhitedress，lookingasifyouhadacrownon，Isaidtomyself:’Bygad，ifshehadoneshe’dwearitasifitgrewonher。’"

StillLilydidnotspeak，andhecontinued，warmingwithhistheme:"Tellyouwhatitis，though，thatkindofwomancostsmorethanalltherestof’emputtogether。Ifawoman’sgoingtoignoreherpearls，theywanttobebetterthananybodyelse’s——andsoitiswitheverythingelse。YouknowwhatI

mean——youknowit’sonlytheshowythingsthatarecheap。Well，I

shouldwantmywifetobeabletotaketheearthforgrantedifshewantedto。Iknowthere’sonethingvulgaraboutmoney，andthat’sthethinkingaboutit；andmywifewouldneverhavetodemeanherselfinthatway。"Hepaused，andthenadded，withanunfortunatelapsetoanearliermanner:"IguessyouknowtheladyI’vegotinview，MissBart。"

Lilyraisedherhead，brighteningalittleunderthechallenge。

Eventhroughthedarktumultofherthoughts，theclinkofMr。

Rosedale’smillionshadafaintlyseductivenote。Oh，forenoughofthemtocancelheronemiserabledebt！ButthemanbehindthemgrewincreasinglyrepugnantinthelightofSelden’sexpectedcoming。Thecontrastwastoogrotesque:shecouldscarcelysuppressthesmileitprovoked。Shedecidedthatdirectnesswouldbebest。

"Ifyoumeanme，Mr。Rosedale，Iamverygrateful——verymuchflattered；butIdon’tknowwhatIhaveeverdonetomakeyouthink——"

"Oh，ifyoumeanyou’renotdeadinlovewithme，I’vegotsenseenoughlefttoseethat。AndIain’ttalkingtoyouasifyouwere——IpresumeIknowthekindoftalkthat’sexpectedunderthosecircumstances。I’mconfoundedlygoneonyou——that’saboutthesizeofit——andI’mjustgivingyouaplainbusinessstatementoftheconsequences。You’renotveryfondofme——YET——butyou’refondofluxury，andstyle，andamusement，andofnothavingtoworryaboutcash。Youliketohaveagoodtime，andnothavetosettleforit；andwhatIproposetodoistoprovideforthegoodtimeanddothesettling。"

Hepaused，andshereturnedwithachillingsmile:"Youaremistakeninonepoint，Mr。Rosedale:whateverIenjoyIampreparedtosettlefor。"

Shespokewiththeintentionofmakinghimseethat，ifhiswordsimpliedatentativeallusiontoherprivateaffairs，shewaspreparedtomeetandrepudiateit。Butifherecognizedhermeaningitfailedtoabashhim，andhewentoninthesametone:

"Ididn’tmeantogiveoffence；excusemeifI’vespokentooplainly。Butwhyain’tyoustraightwithme——whydoyouputupthatkindofbluff？Youknowthere’vebeentimeswhenyouwerebothered——damnedbothered——andasagirlgetsolder，andthingskeepmovingalong，why，beforesheknowsit，thethingsshewantsareliabletomovepastherandnotcomeback。Idon’tsayit’sanywherenearthatwithyouyet；butyou’vehadatasteofbothersthatagirllikeyourselfoughtnevertohaveknownabout，andwhatI’mofferingyouisthechancetoturnyourbackonthemonceforall。"

ThecolourburnedinLily’sfaceasheended；therewasnomistakingthepointhemeanttomake，andtopermitittopassunheededwasafatalconfessionofweakness，whiletoresentittooopenlywastoriskoffendinghimataperilousmoment。

Indignationquiveredonherlip；butitwasquelledbythesecretvoicewhichwarnedherthatshemustnotquarrelwithhim。Heknewtoomuchabouther，andevenatthemomentwhenitwasessentialthatheshouldshowhimselfathisbest，hedidnotscrupletoletherseehowmuchheknew。Howthenwouldheusehispowerwhenherexpressionofcontempthaddispelledhisonemotiveforrestraint？Herwholefuturemighthingeonherwayofansweringhim:shehadtostopandconsiderthat，inthestressofherotheranxieties，asabreathlessfugitivemayhavetopauseatthecross-roadsandtrytodecidecoollywhichturntotake。

"Youarequiteright，Mr。Rosedale。IHAVEhadbothers；andIamgratefultoyouforwantingtorelievemeofthem。Itisnotalwayseasytobequiteindependentandself-respectingwhenoneispoorandlivesamongrichpeople；Ihavebeencarelessaboutmoney，andhaveworriedaboutmybills。ButI

shouldbeselfishandungratefulifImadethatareasonforacceptingallyouoffer，withnobetterreturntomakethanthedesiretobefreefrommyanxieties。Youmustgivemetime——timetothinkofyourkindness——andofwhatIcouldgiveyouinreturnforit——"

Sheheldoutherhandwithacharminggestureinwhichdismissalwasshornofitsrigour。ItshintoffutureleniencymadeRosedaleriseinobediencetoit，alittleflushedwithhisunhoped-forsuccess，anddisciplinedbythetraditionofhisbloodtoacceptwhatwasconceded，withoutunduehastetopressformore。Somethinginhispromptacquiescencefrightenedher；shefeltbehinditthestoredforceofapatiencethatmightsubduethestrongestwill。Butatleasttheyhadpartedamicably，andhewasoutofthehousewithoutmeetingSelden——Selden，whosecontinuedabsencenowsmoteherwithanewalarm。Rosedalehadremainedoveranhour，andsheunderstoodthatitwasnowtoolatetohopeforSelden。Hewouldwriteexplaininghisabsence，ofcourse；therewouldbeanotefromhimbythelatepost。Butherconfessionwouldhavetobepostponed；andthechillofthedelaysettledheavilyonherfaggedspirit。

Itlayheavierwhenthepostman’slastringbroughtnonoteforher，andshehadtogoupstairstoalonelynight——anightasgrimandsleeplessashertorturedfancyhadpicturedittoGerty。Shehadneverlearnedtolivewithherownthoughts，andtobeconfrontedwiththemthroughsuchhoursoflucidmiserymadetheconfusedwretchednessofherpreviousvigilseemeasilybearable。

Daylightdisbandedthephantomcrew，andmadeitcleartoherthatshewouldhearfromSeldenbeforenoon；butthedaypassedwithouthiswritingorcoming。Lilyremainedathome，lunchinganddiningalonewithheraunt，whocomplainedofflutteringsoftheheart，andtalkedicilyongeneraltopics。Mrs。Penistonwenttobedearly，andwhenshehadgoneLilysatdownandwroteanotetoSelden。Shewasabouttoringforamessengertodespatchitwhenhereyefellonaparagraphintheeveningpaperwhichlayatherelbow:

"Mr。LawrenceSeldenwasamongthepassengerssailingthisafternoonforHavanaandtheWestIndiesontheWindwardLinerAntilles。"

Shelaiddownthepaperandsatmotionless，staringathernote。Sheunderstoodnowthathewasnevercoming——thathehadgoneawaybecausehewasafraidthathemightcome。

Sherose，andwalkingacrossthefloorstoodgazingatherselfforalongtimeinthebrightly-litmirrorabovethemantel-

piece。Thelinesinherfacecameoutterribly——shelookedold；andwhenagirllooksoldtoherself，howdoesshelooktootherpeople？Shemovedaway，andbegantowanderaimlesslyabouttheroom，fittingherstepswithmechanicalprecisionbetweenthemonstrousrosesofMrs。Peniston’sAxminster。SuddenlyshenoticedthatthepenwithwhichshehadwrittentoSeldenstillrestedagainsttheuncoveredinkstand。Sheseatedherselfagain，andtakingoutanenvelope，addresseditrapidlytoRosedale。Thenshelaidoutasheetofpaper，andsatoveritwithsuspendedpen。Ithadbeeneasyenoughtowritethedate，and"DearMr。Rosedale"——butafterthatherinspirationflagged。Shemeanttotellhimtocometoher，butthewordsrefusedtoshapethemselves。Atlengthshebegan:"Ihavebeenthinking——"thenshelaidthependown，andsatwithherelbowsonthetableandherfacehiddeninherhands。

Suddenlyshestartedupatthesoundofthedoor-bell。Itwasnotlate——barelyteno’clock——andtheremightstillbeanotefromSelden，oramessage——orhemightbetherehimself，ontheothersideofthedoor！Theannouncementofhissailingmighthavebeenamistake——itmightbeanotherLawrenceSeldenwhohadgonetoHavana——allthesepossibilitieshadtimetoflashthroughhermind，andbuilduptheconvictionthatshewasafteralltoseeorhearfromhim，beforethedrawing-roomdooropenedtoadmitaservantcarryingatelegram。

Lilytoreitopenwithshakinghands，andreadBerthaDorset’snamebelowthemessage:"Sailingunexpectedlytomorrow。WillyoujoinusonacruiseinMediterranean？"



BOOKII

ItcamevividlytoSeldenontheCasinostepsthatMonteCarlohad，morethananyotherplaceheknew，thegiftofaccommodatingitselftoeachman’shumour。Hisown，atthemoment，lentitafestivereadinessofwelcomethatmightwell，inadisenchantedeye，haveturnedtopaintandfacility。Sofrankanappealforparticipation-sooutspokenarecognitionoftheholidayveininhumannature——struckrefreshinglyonamindjadedbyprolongedhardworkinsurroundingsmadeforthedisciplineofthesenses。

Ashesurveyedthewhitesquaresetinanexoticcoquetryofarchitecture，thestudiedtropicalityofthegardens，thegroupsloiteringintheforegroundagainstmauvemountainswhichsuggestedasublimestage-settingforgotteninahurriedshiftingofscenes——ashetookinthewholeoutspreadeffectoflightandleisure，hefeltamovementofrevulsionfromthelastfewmonthsofhislife。

TheNewYorkwinterhadpresentedaninterminableperspectiveofsnow-burdeneddays，reachingtowardaspringofrawsunshineandfuriousair，whentheuglinessofthingsraspedtheeyeasthegrittywindgroundintotheskin。Selden，immersedinhiswork，hadtoldhimselfthatexternalconditionsdidnotmattertoamaninhisstate，andthatcoldanduglinesswereagoodtonicforrelaxedsensibilities。WhenanurgentcasesummonedhimabroadtoconferwithaclientinParis，hebrokereluctantlywiththeroutineoftheoffice；anditwasonlynowthat，havingdespatchedhisbusiness，andslippedawayforaweekinthesouth，hebegantofeeltherenewedzestofspectatorshipthatisthesolaceofthosewhotakeanobjectiveinterestinlife。

Themultiplicityofitsappeals——theperpetualsurpriseofitscontrastsandresemblances！AllthesetricksandturnsoftheshowwereuponhimwithaspringashedescendedtheCasinostepsandpausedonthepavementatitsdoors。Hehadnotbeenabroadforsevenyears——andwhatchangestherenewedcontactproduced！

Ifthecentraldepthswereuntouched，hardlyapin-pointofsurfaceremainedthesame。Andthiswastheveryplacetobringoutthecompletenessoftherenewal。Thesublimities，theperpetuities，mighthavelefthimashewas:butthistentpitchedforaday’srevelryspreadaroofofoblivionbetweenhimselfandhisfixedsky。

Itwasmid-April，andonefeltthattherevelryhadreacheditsclimaxandthatthedesultorygroupsinthesquareandgardenswouldsoondissolveandre-forminotherscenes。Meanwhilethelastmomentsoftheperformanceseemedtogainanaddedbrightnessfromthehoveringthreatofthecurtain。Thequalityoftheair，theexuberanceoftheflowers，theblueintensityofseaandsky，producedtheeffectofaclosingTABLEAU，whenallthelightsareturnedonatonce。Thisimpressionwaspresentlyheightenedbythewayinwhichaconsciouslyconspicuousgroupofpeopleadvancedtothemiddlefront，andstoodbeforeSeldenwiththeairofthechiefperformersgatheredtogetherbytheexigenciesofthefinaleffect。Theirappearanceconfirmedtheimpressionthattheshowhadbeenstagedregardlessofexpense，andemphasizeditsresemblancetooneofthose"costume-plays"inwhichtheprotagonistswalkthroughthepassionswithoutdisplacingadrapery。Theladiesstoodinunrelatedattitudescalculatedtoisolatetheireffects，andthemenhungaboutthemasirrelevantlyasstageheroeswhosetailorsarenamedintheprogramme。ItwasSeldenhimselfwhounwittinglyfusedthegroupbyarrestingtheattentionofoneofitsmembers。

"Why，Mr。Selden！"Mrs。Fisherexclaimedinsurprise；andwithagesturetowardMrs。JackStepneyandMrs。WellingtonBry，sheaddedplaintively:"We’restarvingtodeathbecausewecan’tdecidewheretolunch。"

Welcomedintotheirgroup，andmadetheconfidantoftheirdifficulty，Seldenlearnedwithamusementthattherewereseveralplaceswhereonemightmisssomethingbynotlunching，orforfeitsomethingbylunching；sothateatingactuallybecameaminorconsiderationontheveryspotconsecratedtoitsrites。

"OfcourseonegetsthebestthingsattheTERRASSE——butthatlooksasifonehadn’tanyotherreasonforbeingthere:theAmericanswhodon’tknowanyonealwaysrushforthebestfood。

AndtheDuchessofBeltshirehastakenupBecassin’slately，"

Mrs。Bryearnestlysummedup。

Mrs。Bry，toMrs。Fisher’sdespair，hadnotprogressedbeyondthepointofweighinghersocialalternativesinpublic。Shecouldnotacquiretheairofdoingthingsbecauseshewantedto，andmakingherchoicethefinalsealoftheirfitness。

Mr。Bry，ashortpaleman，withabusinessfaceandleisureclothes，metthedilemmahilariously。

"IguesstheDuchessgoeswhereit’scheapest，unlessshecangethermealpaidfor。IfyouofferedtoblowheroffattheTERRASSE

she’dturnupfastenough。"

ButMrs。JackStepneyinterposed。"TheGrandDukesgotothatlittleplaceattheCondamine。LordHubertsaysit’stheonlyrestaurantinEuropewheretheycancookpeas。"

LordHubertDacey，aslendershabby-lookingman，withacharmingwornsmile，andtheairofhavingspenthisbestyearsinpilotingthewealthytotherightrestaurant，assentedwithgentleemphasis:"It’squitethat。"

"PEAS？"saidMr。Brycontemptuously。"Cantheycookterrapin？Itjustshows，"hecontinued，"whattheseEuropeanmarketsare，whenafellowcanmakeareputationcookingpeas！"

JackStepneyintervenedwithauthority。"Idon’tknowthatI

quiteagreewithDacey:there’salittleholeinParis，offtheQuaiVoltaire——butinanycase，Ican’tadvisetheCondamineGARGOTE；atleastnotwithladies。"

Stepney，sincehismarriage，hadthickenedandgrownprudish，astheVanOsburghhusbandswereapttodo；buthiswife，tohissurpriseanddiscomfiture，haddevelopedanearth-shakingfastnessofgaitwhichlefthimtrailingbreathlesslyinherwake。

"That’swherewe’llgothen！"shedeclared，withaheavytossofherplumage。"I’msotiredoftheTERRASSE:it’sasdullasoneofmother’sdinners。AndLordHuberthaspromisedtotelluswhoalltheawfulpeopleareattheotherplace——hasn’the，Carry？

Now，Jack，don’tlooksosolemn！"

"Well，"saidMrs。Bry，"allIwanttoknowiswhotheirdress-makersare。"

"NodoubtDaceycantellyouthattoo，"remarkedStepney，withanironicintentionwhichtheotherreceivedwiththelightmurmur，"IcanatleastFINDOUT，mydearfellow"；andMrs。Bryhavingdeclaredthatshecouldn’twalkanotherstep，thepartyhailedtwoorthreeofthelightphaetonswhichhoverattentivelyontheconfinesofthegardens，andrattledoffinprocessiontowardtheCondamine。

TheirdestinationwasoneofthelittlerestaurantsoverhangingtheboulevardwhichdipssteeplydownfromMonteCarlotothelowintermediatequarteralongthequay。Fromthewindowinwhichtheypresentlyfoundthemselvesinstalled，theyoverlookedtheintensebluecurveoftheharbour，setbetweentheverdureoftwinpromontories:totheright，thecliffofMonaco，toppedbythemediaevalsilhouetteofitschurchandcastle，tothelefttheterracesandpinnaclesofthegambling-house。Betweenthetwo，thewatersofthebaywerefurrowedbyalightcomingandgoingofpleasure-craft，throughwhich，justattheculminatingmomentofluncheon，themajesticadvanceofagreatsteam-yachtdrewthecompany’sattentionfromthepeas。

"ByJove，Ibelievethat’stheDorsetsback！"Stepneyexclaimed；

andLordHubert，droppinghissingleeye-glass，corroborated:

"It’stheSabrina——yes。"

"Sosoon？TheyweretospendamonthinSicily，"Mrs。Fisherobserved。

"Iguesstheyfeelasiftheyhad:there’sonlyoneup-to-datehotelinthewholeplace，"saidMr。Brydisparagingly。

"ItwasNedSilverton’sidea——butpoorDorsetandLilyBartmusthavebeenhorriblybored。"Mrs。FisheraddedinanundertonetoSelden:"Idohopetherehasn’tbeenarow。"

"It’smostawfullyjollyhavingMissBartback，"saidLordHubert，inhismilddeliberatevoice；andMrs。Bryaddedingenuously:"IdaresaytheDuchesswilldinewithus，nowthatLily’shere。"