第6章

Anelegantcarriagestoodinthemiddleoftheroadwithapairofspiritedgreyhorses；therewasnooneinit，andthecoachmanhadgotoffhisboxandstoodby；thehorseswerebeingheldbythebridle。…Amassofpeoplehadgatheredround，thepolicestandinginfront。Oneofthemheldalightedlanternwhichhewasturningonsomethinglyingclosetothewheels。Everyonewastalking，shouting，exclaiming；thecoachmanseemedatalossandkeptrepeating:

“Whatamisfortune！GoodLord，whatamisfortune！”

Raskolnikovpushedhiswayinasfarashecould，andsucceededatlastinseeingtheobjectofthecommotionandinterest。Onthegroundamanwhohadbeenrunoverlayapparentlyunconscious，andcoveredwithblood；hewasverybadlydressed，butnotlikeaworkman。Bloodwasflowingfromhisheadandface；hisfacewascrushed，mutilatedanddisfigured。Hewasevidentlybadlyinjured。

“Mercifulheaven！”wailedthecoachman，“whatmorecouldIdo？IfI’dbeendrivingfastorhadnotshoutedtohim，butIwasgoingquietly，notinahurry。EveryonecouldseeIwasgoingalongjustlikeeverybodyelse。Adrunkenmancan’twalkstraight，weallknow。…Isawhimcrossingthestreet，staggeringandalmostfalling。Ishoutedagainandasecondandathirdtime，thenIheldthehorsesin，buthefellstraightundertheirfeet！Eitherhediditonpurposeorhewasverytipsy。…Thehorsesareyoungandreadytotakefright…theystarted，hescreamed…thatmadethemworse。That’showithappened！”

“That’sjusthowitwas，”avoiceinthecrowdconfirmed。

“Heshouted，that’strue，heshoutedthreetimes，”anothervoicedeclared。

“Threetimesitwas，weallheardit，”shoutedathird。

Butthecoachmanwasnotverymuchdistressedandfrightened。Itwasevidentthatthecarriagebelongedtoarichandimportantpersonwhowasawaitingitsomewhere；thepolice，ofcourse，wereinnolittleanxietytoavoidupsettinghisarrangements。Alltheyhadtodowastotaketheinjuredmantothepolicestationandthehospital。Nooneknewhisname。

MeanwhileRaskolnikovhadsqueezedinandstoopedcloseroverhim。Thelanternsuddenlylighteduptheunfortunateman’sface。Herecognisedhim。

“Iknowhim！Iknowhim！”heshouted，pushingtothefront。“It’sagovernmentclerkretiredfromtheservice，Marmeladov。HelivesclosebyinKozel’shouse。…Makehasteforadoctor！Iwillpay，see？”Hepulledmoneyoutofhispocketandshowedittothepoliceman。Hewasinviolentagitation。

Thepoliceweregladthattheyhadfoundoutwhothemanwas。Raskolnikovgavehisownnameandaddress，and，asearnestlyasifithadbeenhisfather，hebesoughtthepolicetocarrytheunconsciousMarmeladovtohislodgingatonce。

“Justhere，threehousesaway，”hesaideagerly，“thehousebelongstoKozel，arichGerman。Hewasgoinghome，nodoubtdrunk。Iknowhim，heisadrunkard。Hehasafamilythere，awife，children，hehasonedaughter。…Itwilltaketimetotakehimtothehospital，andthereissuretobeadoctorinthehouse。I’llpay，I’llpay！Atleasthewillbelookedafterathome…theywillhelphimatonce。Buthe’lldiebeforeyougethimtothehospital。”Hemanagedtoslipsomethingunseenintothepoliceman’shand。Butthethingwasstraightforwardandlegitimate，andinanycasehelpwascloserhere。Theyraisedtheinjuredman；peoplevolunteeredtohelp。

Kozel’shousewasthirtyyardsaway。Raskolnikovwalkedbehind，carefullyholdingMarmeladov’sheadandshowingtheway。

“Thisway，thisway！Wemusttakehimupstairsheadforemost。Turnround！I’llpay，I’llmakeitworthyourwhile，”hemuttered。

KaterinaIvanovnahadjustbegun，asshealwaysdidateveryfreemoment，walkingtoandfroinherlittleroomfromwindowtostoveandbackagain，withherarmsfoldedacrossherchest，talkingtoherselfandcoughing。Oflateshehadbeguntotalkmorethanevertohereldestgirl，Polenka，achildoften，who，thoughtherewasmuchshedidnotunderstand，understoodverywellthathermotherneededher，andsoalwayswatchedherwithherbigclevereyesandstroveherutmosttoappeartounderstand。ThistimePolenkawasundressingherlittlebrother，whohadbeenunwellalldayandwasgoingtobed。Theboywaswaitingforhertotakeoffhisshirt，whichhadtobewashedatnight。Hewassittingstraightandmotionlessonachair，withasilent，seriousface，withhislegsstretchedoutstraightbeforehim—heelstogetherandtoesturnedout。

Hewaslisteningtowhathismotherwassayingtohissister，sittingperfectlystillwithpoutinglipsandwide-openeyes，justasallgoodlittleboyshavetositwhentheyareundressedtogotobed。Alittlegirl，stillyounger，dressedliterallyinrags，stoodatthescreen，waitingforherturn。Thedoorontothestairswasopentorelievethemalittlefromthecloudsoftobaccosmokewhichfloatedinfromtheotherroomsandbroughtonlongterriblefitsofcoughinginthepoor，consumptivewoman。KaterinaIvanovnaseemedtohavegrowneventhinnerduringthatweekandthehecticflushonherfacewasbrighterthanever。

“Youwouldn’tbelieve，youcan’timagine，Polenka，”shesaid，walkingabouttheroom，“whatahappyluxuriouslifewehadinmypapa’shouseandhowthisdrunkardhasbroughtme，andwillbringyouall，toruin！Papawasacivilcolonelandonlyastepfrombeingagovernor；sothateveryonewhocametoseehimsaid，‘Welookuponyou，IvanMihailovitch，asourgovernor！’WhenI…when…”shecoughedviolently，“oh，cursedlife，”shecried，clearingherthroatandpressingherhandstoherbreast，“whenI…whenatthelastball…atthemarshal’s…PrincessBezzemelnysawme—whogavemetheblessingwhenyourfatherandIweremarried，Polenka—sheaskedatonce‘Isn’tthattheprettygirlwhodancedtheshawldanceatthebreaking-up？’(Youmustmendthattear，youmusttakeyourneedleanddarnitasIshowedyou，orto-morrow—cough，cough，cough—hewillmaketheholebigger，”shearticulatedwitheffort。)“PrinceSchegolskoy，akammerjunker，hadjustcomefromPetersburgthen…hedancedthemazurkawithmeandwantedtomakemeanoffernextday；butIthankedhiminflatteringexpressionsandtoldhimthatmyhearthadlongbeenanother’s。Thatotherwasyourfather，Polya；papawasfearfullyangry。…Isthewaterready？Givemetheshirt，andthestockings！Lida，”saidshetotheyoungestone，“youmustmanagewithoutyourchemiseto-night…andlayyourstockingsoutwithit…I’llwashthemtogether。…Howisitthatdrunkenvagabonddoesn’tcomein？Hehaswornhisshirttillitlookslikeadish-clout，hehastornittorags！I’ddoitalltogether，soasnottohavetoworktwonightsrunning！Oh，dear！(Cough，cough，cough，cough！)Again！What’sthis？”shecried，noticingacrowdinthepassageandthemen，whowerepushingintoherroom，carryingaburden。“Whatisit？Whataretheybringing？Mercyonus！”

“Wherearewetoputhim？”askedthepoliceman，lookingroundwhenMarmeladov，unconsciousandcoveredwithblood，hadbeencarriedin。

“Onthesofa！Puthimstraightonthesofa，withhisheadthisway，”Raskolnikovshowedhim。

“Runoverintheroad！Drunk！”someoneshoutedinthepassage。

KaterinaIvanovnastood，turningwhiteandgaspingforbreath。Thechildrenwereterrified。LittleLidascreamed，rushedtoPolenkaandclutchedather，tremblingallover。

HavinglaidMarmeladovdown，RaskolnikovflewtoKaterinaIvanovna。

“ForGod’ssakebecalm，don’tbefrightened！”hesaid，speakingquickly，“hewascrossingtheroadandwasrunoverbyacarriage，don’tbefrightened，hewillcometo，Itoldthembringhimhere…I’vebeenherealready，youremember？Hewillcometo；I’llpay！”

“He’sdoneitthistime！”KaterinaIvanovnacrieddespairinglyandsherushedtoherhusband。

Raskolnikovnoticedatoncethatshewasnotoneofthosewomenwhoswooneasily。Sheinstantlyplacedunderthelucklessman’sheadapillow，whichnoonehadthoughtofandbeganundressingandexamininghim。Shekeptherhead，forgettingherself，bitinghertremblinglipsandstiflingthescreamswhichwerereadytobreakfromher。

Raskolnikovmeanwhileinducedsomeonetorunforadoctor。Therewasadoctor，itappeared，nextdoorbutone。

“I’vesentforadoctor，”hekeptassuringKaterinaIvanovna，“don’tbeuneasy，I’llpay。Haven’tyouwater？…andgivemeanapkinoratowel，anything，asquickasyoucan。…Heisinjured，butnotkilled，believeme。…Weshallseewhatthedoctorsays！”

KaterinaIvanovnarantothewindow；there，onabrokenchairinthecorner，alargeearthenwarebasinfullofwaterhadbeenstood，inreadinessforwashingherchildren’sandhusband’slinenthatnight。ThiswashingwasdonebyKaterinaIvanovnaatnightatleasttwiceaweek，ifnotoftener。Forthefamilyhadcometosuchapassthattheywerepracticallywithoutchangeoflinen，andKaterinaIvanovnacouldnotendureuncleanlinessand，ratherthanseedirtinthehouse，shepreferredtowearherselfoutatnight，workingbeyondherstrengthwhentherestwereasleep，soastogetthewetlinenhungonalineanddrybythemorning。ShetookupthebasinofwateratRaskolnikov’srequest，butalmostfelldownwithherburden。Butthelatterhadalreadysucceededinfindingatowel，wetteditandbeganwashingthebloodoffMarmeladov’sface。

KaterinaIvanovnastoodby，breathingpainfullyandpressingherhandstoherbreast。Shewasinneedofattentionherself。Raskolnikovbegantorealisethathemighthavemadeamistakeinhavingtheinjuredmanbroughthere。Thepoliceman，too，stoodinhesitation。

“Polenka，”criedKaterinaIvanovna，“runtoSonia，makehaste。Ifyoudon’tfindherathome，leavewordthatherfatherhasbeenrunoverandthatsheistocomehereatonce…whenshecomesin。Run，Polenka！there，putontheshawl。”

“Runyourfastest！”criedthelittleboyonthechairsuddenly，afterwhichherelapsedintothesamedumbrigidity，withroundeyes，hisheelsthrustforwardandhistoesspreadout。

Meanwhiletheroomhadbecomesofullofpeoplethatyoucouldn’thavedroppedapin。Thepolicemenleft，allexceptone，whoremainedforatime，tryingtodriveoutthepeoplewhocameinfromthestairs。AlmostallMadameLippevechsel’slodgershadstreamedinfromtheinnerroomsoftheflat；atfirsttheyweresqueezedtogetherinthedoorway，butafterwardstheyoverflowedintotheroom。KaterinaIvanovnaflewintoafury。

“Youmightlethimdieinpeace，atleast，”sheshoutedatthecrowd，“isitaspectacleforyoutogapeat？Withcigarettes！(Cough，cough，cough！)Youmightaswellkeepyourhatson。…Andthereisoneinhishat！…Getaway！Youshouldrespectthedead，atleast！”

Hercoughchokedher—butherreproacheswerenotwithoutresult。TheyevidentlystoodinsomeaweofKaterinaIvanovna。Thelodgers，oneafteranother，squeezedbackintothedoorwaywiththatstrangeinnerfeelingofsatisfactionwhichmaybeobservedinthepresenceofasuddenaccident，eveninthosenearestanddearesttothevictim，fromwhichnolivingmanisexempt，eveninspiteofthesincerestsympathyandcompassion。

Voicesoutsidewereheard，however，speakingofthehospitalandsayingthatthey’dnobusinesstomakeadisturbancehere。

“Nobusinesstodie！”criedKaterinaIvanovna，andshewasrushingtothedoortoventherwrathuponthem，butinthedoorwaycamefacetofacewithMadameLippevechselwhohadonlyjustheardoftheaccidentandranintorestoreorder。ShewasaparticularlyquarrelsomeandirresponsibleGerman。

“Ah，myGod！”shecried，claspingherhands，“yourhusbanddrunkenhorseshavetrampled！Tothehospitalwithhim！Iamthelandlady！”

“AmaliaLudwigovna，Ibegyoutorecollectwhatyouaresaying，”KaterinaIvanovnabeganhaughtily(shealwaystookahaughtytonewiththelandladythatshemight“rememberherplace”andevennowcouldnotdenyherselfthissatisfaction)。“AmaliaLudwigovna…”

“IhaveyouoncebeforetoldthatyoutocallmeAmaliaLudwigovnamaynotdare；IamAmaliaIvanovna。”

“YouarenotAmaliaIvanovna，butAmaliaLudwigovna，andasIamnotoneofyourdespicableflattererslikeMr。Lebeziatnikov，who’slaughingbehindthedooratthismoment(alaughandacryof‘theyareatitagain’wasinfactaudibleatthedoor)soIshallalwayscallyouAmaliaLudwigovna，thoughIfailtounderstandwhyyoudislikethatname。YoucanseeforyourselfwhathashappenedtoSemyonZaharovitch；heisdying。Ibegyoutoclosethatdooratonceandtoadmitnoone。Lethimatleastdieinpeace！OrIwarnyoutheGovernor-General，himself，shallbeinformedofyourconductto-morrow。Theprinceknewmeasagirl；heremembersSemyonZaharovitchwellandhasoftenbeenabenefactortohim。EveryoneknowsthatSemyonZaharovitchhadmanyfriendsandprotectors，whomheabandonedhimselffromanhonourablepride，knowinghisunhappyweakness，butnow(shepointedtoRaskolnikov)agenerousyoungmanhascometoourassistance，whohaswealthandconnectionsandwhomSemyonZaharovitchhasknownfromachild。Youmayrestassured，AmaliaLudwigovna…”

Allthiswasutteredwithextremerapidity，gettingquickerandquicker，butacoughsuddenlycutshortKaterinaIvanovna’seloquence。Atthatinstantthedyingmanrecoveredconsciousnessandutteredagroan；sherantohim。TheinjuredmanopenedhiseyesandwithoutrecognitionorunderstandinggazedatRaskolnikovwhowasbendingoverhim。Hedrewdeep，slow，painfulbreaths；bloodoozedatthecornersofhismouthanddropsofperspirationcameoutonhisforehead。NotrecognisingRaskolnikov，hebeganlookingrounduneasily。KaterinaIvanovnalookedathimwithasadbutsternface，andtearstrickledfromhereyes。

“MyGod！Hiswholechestiscrushed！Howheisbleeding，”shesaidindespair。“Wemusttakeoffhisclothes。Turnalittle，SemyonZaharovitch，ifyoucan，”shecriedtohim。

Marmeladovrecognisedher。

“Apriest，”hearticulatedhuskily。

KaterinaIvanovnawalkedtothewindow，laidherheadagainstthewindowframeandexclaimedindespair:

“Oh，cursedlife！”

“Apriest，”thedyingmansaidagainafteramoment’ssilence。

“They’vegoneforhim，”KaterinaIvanovnashoutedtohim，heobeyedhershoutandwassilent。Withsadandtimideyeshelookedforher；shereturnedandstoodbyhispillow。Heseemedalittleeasierbutnotforlong。

SoonhiseyesrestedonlittleLida，hisfavourite，whowasshakinginthecorner，asthoughshewereinafit，andstaringathimwithherwonderingchildisheyes。

“A-ah，”hesignedtowardsheruneasily。Hewantedtosaysomething。

“Whatnow？”criedKaterinaIvanovna。

“Barefoot，barefoot！”hemuttered，indicatingwithfrenziedeyesthechild’sbarefeet。

“Besilent，”KaterinaIvanovnacriedirritably，“youknowwhysheisbarefooted。”

“ThankGod，thedoctor，”exclaimedRaskolnikov，relieved。

Thedoctorcamein，apreciselittleoldman，aGerman，lookingabouthimmistrustfully；hewentuptothesickman，tookhispulse，carefullyfelthisheadandwiththehelpofKaterinaIvanovnaheunbuttonedtheblood-stainedshirt，andbaredtheinjuredman’schest。Itwasgashed，crushedandfractured，severalribsontherightsidewerebroken。Ontheleftside，justovertheheart，wasalarge，sinister-lookingyellowish-blackbruise—acruelkickfromthehorse’shoof。Thedoctorfrowned。Thepolicemantoldhimthathewascaughtinthewheelandturnedroundwithitforthirtyyardsontheroad。

“It’swonderfulthathehasrecoveredconsciousness，”thedoctorwhisperedsoftlytoRaskolnikov。

“Whatdoyouthinkofhim？”heasked。

“Hewilldieimmediately。”

“Istherereallynohope？”

“Notthefaintest！Heisatthelastgasp。…Hisheadisbadlyinjured，too…Hm…Icouldbleedhimifyoulike，but…itwouldbeuseless。Heisboundtodiewithinthenextfiveortenminutes。”

“Betterbleedhimthen。”

“Ifyoulike。…ButIwarnyouitwillbeperfectlyuseless。”

Atthatmomentotherstepswereheard；thecrowdinthepassageparted，andthepriest，alittle，greyoldman，appearedinthedoorwaybearingthesacrament。Apolicemanhadgoneforhimatthetimeoftheaccident。Thedoctorchangedplaceswithhim，exchangingglanceswithhim。Raskolnikovbeggedthedoctortoremainalittlewhile。Heshruggedhisshouldersandremained。

Allsteppedback。Theconfessionwassoonover。Thedyingmanprobablyunderstoodlittle；hecouldonlyutterindistinctbrokensounds。KaterinaIvanovnatooklittleLida，liftedtheboyfromthechair，kneltdowninthecornerbythestoveandmadethechildrenkneelinfrontofher。Thelittlegirlwasstilltrembling；buttheboy，kneelingonhislittlebareknees，liftedhishandrhythmically，crossinghimselfwithprecisionandboweddown，touchingthefloorwithhisforehead，whichseemedtoaffordhimespecialsatisfaction。KaterinaIvanovnabitherlipsandheldbackhertears；sheprayed，too，nowandthenpullingstraighttheboy’sshirt，andmanagedtocoverthegirl’sbareshoulderswithakerchief，whichshetookfromthechestwithoutrisingfromherkneesorceasingtopray。Meanwhilethedoorfromtheinnerroomswasopenedinquisitivelyagain。Inthepassagethecrowdofspectatorsfromalltheflatsonthestaircasegrewdenseranddenser，buttheydidnotventurebeyondthethreshold。Asinglecandle-endlightedupthescene。

AtthatmomentPolenkaforcedherwaythroughthecrowdatthedoor。Shecameinpantingfromrunningsofast，tookoffherkerchief，lookedforhermother，wentuptoherandsaid，“She’scoming，Imetherinthestreet。”Hermothermadeherkneelbesideher。

Timidlyandnoiselesslyayounggirlmadeherwaythroughthecrowd，andstrangewasherappearanceinthatroom，inthemidstofwant，rags，deathanddespair。She，too，wasinrags，herattirewasallofthecheapest，butdeckedoutingutterfineryofaspecialstamp，unmistakablybetrayingitsshamefulpurpose。Soniastoppedshortinthedoorwayandlookedaboutherbewildered，unconsciousofeverything。Sheforgotherfourth-hand，gaudysilkdress，sounseemlyherewithitsridiculouslongtrain，andherimmensecrinolinethatfilledupthewholedoorway，andherlight-colouredshoes，andtheparasolshebroughtwithher，thoughitwasnouseatnight，andtheabsurdroundstrawhatwithitsflaringflame-colouredfeather。Underthisrakishly-tiltedhatwasapale，frightenedlittlefacewithlipspartedandeyesstaringinterror。Soniawasasmallthingirlofeighteenwithfairhair，ratherpretty，withwonderfulblueeyes。Shelookedintentlyatthebedandthepriest；shetoowasoutofbreathwithrunning。Atlastwhispers，somewordsinthecrowdprobably，reachedher。Shelookeddownandtookastepforwardintotheroom，stillkeepingclosetothedoor。

Theservicewasover。KaterinaIvanovnawentuptoherhusbandagain。TheprieststeppedbackandturnedtosayafewwordsofadmonitionandconsolationtoKaterinaIvanovnaonleaving。

“WhatamItodowiththese？”sheinterruptedsharplyandirritably，pointingtothelittleones。

“Godismerciful；looktotheMostHighforsuccour，”thepriestbegan。

“Ach！Heismerciful，butnottous。”

“That’sasin，asin，madam，”observedthepriest，shakinghishead。

“Andisn’tthatasin？”criedKaterinaIvanovna，pointingtothedyingman。

“Perhapsthosewhohaveinvoluntarilycausedtheaccidentwillagreetocompensateyou，atleastforthelossofhisearnings。”

“Youdon’tunderstand！”criedKaterinaIvanovnaangrilywavingherhand。“Andwhyshouldtheycompensateme？Why，hewasdrunkandthrewhimselfunderthehorses！Whatearnings？Hebroughtusinnothingbutmisery。Hedrankeverythingaway，thedrunkard！Herobbedustogetdrink，hewastedtheirlivesandminefordrink！AndthankGodhe’sdying！Onelesstokeep！”

“Youmustforgiveinthehourofdeath，that’sasin，madam，suchfeelingsareagreatsin。”

KaterinaIvanovnawasbusywiththedyingman；shewasgivinghimwater，wipingthebloodandsweatfromhishead，settinghispillowstraight，andhadonlyturnednowandthenforamomenttoaddressthepriest。Nowsheflewathimalmostinafrenzy。

“Ah，father！That’swordsandonlywords！Forgive！Ifhe’dnotbeenrunover，he’dhavecomehometo-daydrunkandhisonlyshirtdirtyandinragsandhe’dhavefallenasleeplikealog，andIshouldhavebeensousingandrinsingtilldaybreak，washinghisragsandthechildren’sandthendryingthembythewindowandassoonasitwasdaylightIshouldhavebeendarningthem。That’showIspendmynights！…What’stheuseoftalkingofforgiveness！Ihaveforgivenasitis！”

Aterriblehollowcoughinterruptedherwords。Sheputherhandkerchieftoherlipsandshowedittothepriest，pressingherotherhandtoherachingchest。Thehandkerchiefwascoveredwithblood。Thepriestbowedhisheadandsaidnothing。

Marmeladovwasinthelastagony；hedidnottakehiseyesoffthefaceofKaterinaIvanovna，whowasbendingoverhimagain。Hekepttryingtosaysomethingtoher；hebeganmovinghistonguewithdifficultyandarticulatingindistinctly，butKaterinaIvanovna，understandingthathewantedtoaskherforgiveness，calledperemptorilytohim:

“Besilent！Noneed！Iknowwhatyouwanttosay！”Andthesickmanwassilent，butatthesameinstanthiswanderingeyesstrayedtothedoorwayandhesawSonia。

Tillthenhehadnotnoticedher:shewasstandingintheshadowinacorner。

“Who’sthat？Who’sthat？”hesaidsuddenlyinathickgaspingvoice，inagitation，turninghiseyesinhorrortowardsthedoorwherehisdaughterwasstanding，andtryingtositup。

“Liedown！Liedo-own！”criedKaterinaIvanovna。

Withunnaturalstrengthhehadsucceededinproppinghimselfonhiselbow。Helookedwildlyandfixedlyforsometimeonhisdaughter，asthoughnotrecognisingher。Hehadneverseenherbeforeinsuchattire。Suddenlyherecognisedher，crushedandashamedinherhumiliationandgaudyfinery，meeklyawaitingherturntosaygood-byetoherdyingfather。Hisfaceshowedintensesuffering。

“Sonia！Daughter！Forgive！”hecried，andhetriedtoholdouthishandtoher，butlosinghisbalance，hefelloffthesofa，facedownwardsonthefloor。Theyrushedtopickhimup，theyputhimonthesofa；buthewasdying。Soniawithafaintcryranup，embracedhimandremainedsowithoutmoving。Hediedinherarms。

“He’sgotwhathewanted，”KaterinaIvanovnacried，seeingherhusband’sdeadbody。“Well，what’stobedonenow？HowamItoburyhim！WhatcanIgivethemto-morrowtoeat？”

RaskolnikovwentuptoKaterinaIvanovna。

“KaterinaIvanovna，”hebegan，“lastweekyourhusbandtoldmeallhislifeandcircumstances。…Believeme，hespokeofyouwithpassionatereverence。Fromthatevening，whenIlearnthowdevotedhewastoyouallandhowhelovedandrespectedyouespecially，KaterinaIvanovna，inspiteofhisunfortunateweakness，fromthateveningwebecamefriends。…Allowmenow…todosomething…torepaymydebttomydeadfriend。Herearetwentyroubles，Ithink—andifthatcanbeofanyassistancetoyou，then…I…inshort，Iwillcomeagain，Iwillbesuretocomeagain…Ishall，perhaps，comeagainto-morrow。…Good-bye！”

Andhewentquicklyoutoftheroom，squeezinghiswaythroughthecrowdtothestairs。ButinthecrowdhesuddenlyjostledagainstNikodimFomitch，whohadheardoftheaccidentandhadcometogiveinstructionsinperson。Theyhadnotmetsincethesceneatthepolicestation，butNikodimFomitchknewhiminstantly。

“Ah，isthatyou？”heaskedhim。

“He’sdead，”answeredRaskolnikov。“Thedoctorandthepriesthavebeen，allasitshouldhavebeen。Don’tworrythepoorwomantoomuch，sheisinconsumptionasitis。Tryandcheerherup，ifpossible…youareakind-heartedman，Iknow…”headdedwithasmile，lookingstraightinhisface。

“Butyouarespatteredwithblood，”observedNikodimFomitch，noticinginthelamplightsomefreshstainsonRaskolnikov’swaistcoat。

“Yes…I’mcoveredwithblood，”Raskolnikovsaidwithapeculiarair；thenhesmiled，noddedandwentdownstairs。

Hewalkeddownslowlyanddeliberately，feverishbutnotconsciousofit，entirelyabsorbedinanewoverwhelmingsensationoflifeandstrengththatsurgedupsuddenlywithinhim。Thissensationmightbecomparedtothatofamancondemnedtodeathwhohassuddenlybeenpardoned。Halfwaydownthestaircasehewasovertakenbythepriestonhiswayhome；Raskolnikovlethimpass，exchangingasilentgreetingwithhim。Hewasjustdescendingthelaststepswhenheheardrapidfootstepsbehindhim。someoneovertookhim；itwasPolenka。Shewasrunningafterhim，calling“Wait！wait！”

Heturnedround。Shewasatthebottomofthestaircaseandstoppedshortastepabovehim。Adimlightcameinfromtheyard。Raskolnikovcoulddistinguishthechild’sthinbutprettylittleface，lookingathimwithabrightchildishsmile。Shehadrunafterhimwithamessagewhichshewasevidentlygladtogive。

“Tellme，whatisyourname？…andwheredoyoulive？”shesaidhurriedlyinabreathlessvoice。

Helaidbothhandsonhershouldersandlookedatherwithasortofrapture。Itwassuchajoytohimtolookather，hecouldnothavesaidwhy。

“Whosentyou？”

“SisterSoniasentme，”answeredthegirl，smilingstillmorebrightly。

“IknewitwassisterSoniasentyou。”

“Mammasentme，too…whensisterSoniawassendingme，mammacameup，too，andsaid‘Runfast，Polenka。’”

“DoyoulovesisterSonia？”

“Ilovehermorethananyone，”Polenkaansweredwithapeculiarearnestness，andhersmilebecamegraver。

“Andwillyouloveme？”

Bywayofanswerhesawthelittlegirl’sfaceapproachinghim，herfulllipsnaivelyheldouttokisshim。Suddenlyherarmsasthinassticksheldhimtightly，herheadrestedonhisshoulderandthelittlegirlweptsoftly，pressingherfaceagainsthim。

“Iamsorryforfather，”shesaidamomentlater，raisinghertear-stainedfaceandbrushingawaythetearswithherhands。“It’snothingbutmisfortunesnow，”sheaddedsuddenlywiththatpeculiarlysedateairwhichchildrentryhardtoassumewhentheywanttospeaklikegrown-uppeople。

“Didyourfatherloveyou？”

“HelovedLidamost，”shewentonveryseriouslywithoutasmile，exactlylikegrown-uppeople，“helovedherbecausesheislittleandbecausesheisill，too。Andhealwaysusedtobringherpresents。Buthetaughtustoreadandmegrammarandscripture，too，”sheaddedwithdignity。“Andmotherneverusedtosayanything，butweknewthatshelikeditandfatherknewit，too。AndmotherwantstoteachmeFrench，forit’stimemyeducationbegan。”

“Anddoyouknowyourprayers？”

“Ofcourse，wedo！Weknewthemlongago。IsaymyprayerstomyselfasIamabiggirlnow，butKolyaandLidasaythemaloudwithmother。Firsttheyrepeatthe‘AveMaria’andthenanotherprayer:‘Lord，forgiveandblesssisterSonia，’andthenanother，‘Lord，forgiveandblessoursecondfather。’Forourelderfatherisdeadandthisisanotherone，butwedoprayfortheotheraswell。”

“Polenka，mynameisRodion。Praysometimesforme，too。‘AndThyservantRodion，’nothingmore。”

“I’llprayforyoualltherestofmylife，”thelittlegirldeclaredhotly，andsuddenlysmilingagainsherushedathimandhuggedhimwarmlyoncemore。

Raskolnikovtoldherhisnameandaddressandpromisedtobesuretocomenextday。Thechildwentawayquiteenchantedwithhim。Itwaspasttenwhenhecameoutintothestreet。Infiveminuteshewasstandingonthebridgeatthespotwherethewomanhadjumpedin。

“Enough，”hepronouncedresolutelyandtriumphantly。“I’vedonewithfancies，imaginaryterrorsandphantoms！Lifeisreal！haven’tIlivedjustnow？Mylifehasnotyetdiedwiththatoldwoman！TheKingdomofHeaventoher—andnowenough，madam，leavemeinpeace！Nowforthereignofreasonandlight…andofwill，andofstrength…andnowwewillsee！Wewilltryourstrength！”headdeddefiantly，asthoughchallengingsomepowerofdarkness。“AndIwasreadytoconsenttoliveinasquareofspace！

“Iamveryweakatthismoment，but…Ibelievemyillnessisallover。IknewitwouldbeoverwhenIwentout。Bytheway，Potchinkov’shouseisonlyafewstepsaway。IcertainlymustgotoRazumihinevenifitwerenotcloseby…lethimwinhisbet！Letusgivehimsomesatisfaction，too—nomatter！Strength，strengthiswhatonewants，youcangetnothingwithoutit，andstrengthmustbewonbystrength—that’swhattheydon’tknow，”headdedproudlyandself-confidentlyandhewalkedwithflaggingfootstepsfromthebridge。Prideandself-confidencegrewcontinuallystrongerinhim；hewasbecomingadifferentmaneverymoment。Whatwasithadhappenedtoworkthisrevolutioninhim？Hedidnotknowhimself；likeamancatchingatastraw，hesuddenlyfeltthathe，too，‘couldlive，thattherewasstilllifeforhim，thathislifehadnotdiedwiththeoldwoman。’Perhapshewasintoogreatahurrywithhisconclusions，buthedidnotthinkofthat。

“ButIdidaskhertoremember‘ThyservantRodion’inherprayers，”theideastruckhim。“Well，thatwas…incaseofemergency，”headdedandlaughedhimselfathisboyishsally。Hewasinthebestofspirits。

HeeasilyfoundRazumihin；thenewlodgerwasalreadyknownatPotchinkov’sandtheporteratonceshowedhimtheway。Half-wayupstairshecouldhearthenoiseandanimatedconversationofabiggatheringofpeople。Thedoorwaswideopenonthestairs；hecouldhearexclamationsanddiscussion。Razumihin’sroomwasfairlylarge；thecompanyconsistedoffifteenpeople。Raskolnikovstoppedintheentry，wheretwoofthelandlady’sservantswerebusybehindascreenwithtwosamovars，bottles，platesanddishesofpieandsavouries，broughtupfromthelandlady’skitchen。RaskolnikovsentinforRazumihin。Heranoutdelighted。Atthefirstglanceitwasapparentthathehadhadagreatdealtodrinkand，thoughnoamountofliquormadeRazumihinquitedrunk，thistimehewasperceptiblyaffectedbyit。

“Listen，”Raskolnikovhastenedtosay，“I’veonlyjustcometotellyouyou’vewonyourbetandthatnoonereallyknowswhatmaynothappentohim。Ican’tcomein；IamsoweakthatIshallfalldowndirectly。Andsogoodeveningandgood-bye！Comeandseemeto-morrow。”

“Doyouknowwhat？I’llseeyouhome。Ifyousayyou’reweakyourself，youmust…”

“Andyourvisitors？Whoisthecurly-headedonewhohasjustpeepedout？”

“He？Goodnessonlyknows！Somefriendofuncle’s，Iexpect，orperhapshehascomewithoutbeinginvited…I’llleaveunclewiththem，heisaninvaluableperson，pityIcan’tintroduceyoutohimnow。Butconfoundthemallnow！Theywon’tnoticeme，andIneedalittlefreshair，foryou’vecomejustinthenickoftime—anothertwominutesandIshouldhavecometoblows！Theyaretalkingsuchalotofwildstuff…yousimplycan’timaginewhatmenwillsay！Thoughwhyshouldn’tyouimagine？Don’twetalknonsenseourselves？Andletthem…that’sthewaytolearnnotto！…Waitaminute，I’llfetchZossimov。”

ZossimovpounceduponRaskolnikovalmostgreedily；heshowedaspecialinterestinhim；soonhisfacebrightened。

“Youmustgotobedatonce，”hepronounced，examiningthepatientasfarashecould，“andtakesomethingforthenight。Willyoutakeit？Igotitreadysometimeago…apowder。”

“Two，ifyoulike，”answeredRaskolnikov。Thepowderwastakenatonce。

“It’sagoodthingyouaretakinghimhome，”observedZossimovtoRazumihin—“weshallseehowheisto-morrow，to-dayhe’snotatallamiss—aconsiderablechangesincetheafternoon。Liveandlearn…”

“DoyouknowwhatZossimovwhisperedtomewhenwewerecomingout？”Razumihinblurtedout，assoonastheywereinthestreet。“Iwon’ttellyoueverything，brother，becausetheyaresuchfools。Zossimovtoldmetotalkfreelytoyouonthewayandgetyoutotalkfreelytome，andafterwardsIamtotellhimaboutit，forhe’sgotanotioninhisheadthatyouare…madorcloseonit。Onlyfancy！Inthefirstplace，you’vethreetimesthebrainshehas；inthesecond，ifyouarenotmad，youneedn’tcareahangthathehasgotsuchawildidea；andthirdly，thatpieceofbeefwhosespecialtyissurgeryhasgonemadonmentaldiseases，andwhat’sbroughthimtothisconclusionaboutyouwasyourconversationto-daywithZametov。”

“Zametovtoldyouallaboutit？”

“Yes，andhedidwell。NowIunderstandwhatitallmeansandsodoesZametov。…Well，thefactis，Rodya…thepointis…Iamalittledrunknow。…Butthat’s…nomatter…thepointisthatthisidea…youunderstand？wasjustbeinghatchedintheirbrains…youunderstand？Thatis，nooneventuredtosayitaloud，becausetheideaistooabsurdandespeciallysincethearrestofthatpainter，thatbubble’sburstandgoneforever。Butwhyaretheysuchfools？IgaveZametovabitofathrashingatthetime—that’sbetweenourselves，brother；pleasedon’tletoutahintthatyouknowofit；I’venoticedheisaticklishsubject；itwasatLuiseIvanovna’s。Butto-day，to-dayit’sallclearedup。ThatIlyaPetrovitchisatthebottomofit！Hetookadvantageofyourfaintingatthepolicestation，butheisashamedofithimselfnow；Iknowthat…”

Raskolnikovlistenedgreedily。Razumihinwasdrunkenoughtotalktoofreely。

“Ifaintedthenbecauseitwassocloseandthesmellofpaint，”saidRaskolnikov。

“Noneedtoexplainthat！Anditwasn’tthepaintonly:thefeverhadbeencomingonforamonth；Zossimovtestifiestothat！Buthowcrushedthatboyisnow，youwouldn’tbelieve！‘Iamnotworthhislittlefinger，’hesays。Yours，hemeans。Hehasgoodfeelingsattimes，brother。Butthelesson，thelessonyougavehimto-dayinthePalaisdeCristal，thatwastoogoodforanything！Youfrightenedhimatfirst，youknow，henearlywentintoconvulsions！Youalmostconvincedhimagainofthetruthofallthathideousnonsense，andthenyousuddenly—putoutyourtongueathim:‘Therenow，whatdoyoumakeofit？’Itwasperfect！Heiscrushed，annihilatednow！Itwasmasterly，byJove，it’swhattheydeserve！Ah，thatIwasn’tthere！Hewashopingtoseeyouawfully。Porfiry，too，wantstomakeyouracquaintance…”

“Ah！…hetoo…butwhydidtheyputmedownasmad？”

“Oh，notmad。Imusthavesaidtoomuch，brother。…Whatstruckhim，yousee，wasthatonlythatsubjectseemedtointerestyou；nowit’sclearwhyitdidinterestyou；knowingallthecircumstances…andhowthatirritatedyouandworkedinwithyourillness…Iamalittledrunk，brother，only，confoundhim，hehassomeideaofhisown…Itellyou，he’smadonmentaldiseases。Butdon’tyoumindhim…”

Forhalfaminutebothweresilent。

“Listen，Razumihin，”beganRaskolnikov，“Iwanttotellyouplainly:I’vejustbeenatadeath-bed，aclerkwhodied…Igavethemallmymoney…andbesidesI’vejustbeenkissedbysomeonewho，ifIhadkilledanyone，wouldjustthesame…infactIsawsomeoneelsethere…withaflame-colouredfeather…butIamtalkingnonsense；Iamveryweak，supportme…weshallbeatthestairsdirectly…”

“What’sthematter？What’sthematterwithyou？”Razumihinaskedanxiously。

“Iamalittlegiddy，butthat’snotthepoint，Iamsosad，sosad…likeawoman。Look，what’sthat？Look，look！”

“Whatisit？”

“Don’tyousee？Alightinmyroom，yousee？Throughthecrack…”

Theywerealreadyatthefootofthelastflightofstairs，atthelevelofthelandlady’sdoor，andtheycould，asafact，seefrombelowthattherewasalightinRaskolnikov’sgarret。

“Queer！Nastasya，perhaps，”observedRazumihin。

“Sheisneverinmyroomatthistimeandshemustbeinbedlongago，but…Idon’tcare！Good-bye！”

“Whatdoyoumean？Iamcomingwithyou，we’llcomeintogether！”

“Iknowwearegoingintogether，butIwanttoshakehandshereandsaygood-byetoyouhere。Sogivemeyourhand，good-bye！”

“What’sthematterwithyou，Rodya？”

“Nothing…comealong…youshallbewitness。”

Theybeganmountingthestairs，andtheideastruckRazumihinthatperhapsZossimovmightberightafterall。“Ah，I’veupsethimwithmychatter！”hemutteredtohimself。

Whentheyreachedthedoortheyheardvoicesintheroom。

“Whatisit？”criedRazumihin。Raskolnikovwasthefirsttoopenthedoor；heflungitwideandstoodstillinthedoorway，dumbfoundered。

Hismotherandsisterweresittingonhissofaandhadbeenwaitinganhourandahalfforhim。Whyhadheneverexpected，neverthoughtofthem，thoughthenewsthattheyhadstarted，wereontheirwayandwouldarriveimmediately，hadbeenrepeatedtohimonlythatday？TheyhadspentthathourandahalfplyingNastasyawithquestions。Shewasstandingbeforethemandhadtoldthemeverythingbynow。Theywerebesidethemselveswithalarmwhentheyheardofhis“runningaway”to-day，illand，astheyunderstoodfromherstory，delirious！“GoodHeavens，whathadbecomeofhim？”Bothhadbeenweeping，bothhadbeeninanguishforthathourandahalf。

Acryofjoy，ofecstasy，greetedRaskolnikov’sentrance。Bothrushedtohim。Buthestoodlikeonedead；asuddenintolerablesensationstruckhimlikeathunderbolt。Hedidnotlifthisarmstoembracethem，hecouldnot。Hismotherandsisterclaspedhimintheirarms，kissedhim，laughedandcried。Hetookastep，totteredandfelltotheground，fainting。

Anxiety，criesofhorror，moans…Razumihinwhowasstandinginthedoorwayflewintotheroom，seizedthesickmaninhisstrongarmsandinamomenthadhimonthesofa。

“It’snothing，nothing！”hecriedtothemotherandsister—“it’sonlyafaint，ameretrifle！Onlyjustnowthedoctorsaidhewasmuchbetter，thatheisperfectlywell！Water！See，heiscomingtohimself，heisallrightagain！”

AndseizingDouniabythearmsothathealmostdislocatedit，hemadeherbenddowntoseethat“heisallrightagain。”Themotherandsisterlookedonhimwithemotionandgratitude，astheirProvidence。TheyhadheardalreadyfromNastasyaallthathadbeendonefortheirRodyaduringhisillness，bythis“verycompetentyoungman，”asPulcheriaAlexandrovnaRaskolnikovcalledhimthateveninginconversationwithDounia。

Raskolnikovgotup，andsatdownonthesofa。HewavedhishandweaklytoRazumihintocutshorttheflowofwarmandincoherentconsolationshewasaddressingtohismotherandsister，tookthembothbythehandandforaminuteortwogazedfromonetotheotherwithoutspeaking。Hismotherwasalarmedbyhisexpression。Itrevealedanemotionagonisinglypoignant，andatthesametimesomethingimmovable，almostinsane。PulcheriaAlexandrovnabegantocry。

AvdotyaRomanovnawaspale；herhandtrembledinherbrother’s。

“Gohome…withhim，”hesaidinabrokenvoice，pointingtoRazumihin，“good-byetillto-morrow；to-morroweverything…Isitlongsinceyouarrived？”

“Thisevening，Rodya，”answeredPulcheriaAlexandrovna，“thetrainwasawfullylate。But，Rodya，nothingwouldinducemetoleaveyounow！Iwillspendthenighthere，nearyou…”

“Don’ttortureme！”hesaidwithagestureofirritation。

“Iwillstaywithhim，”criedRazumihin，“Iwon’tleavehimforamoment。Botherallmyvisitors！Letthemragetotheirhearts’content！Myuncleispresidingthere。”

“How，howcanIthankyou！”PulcheriaAlexandrovnawasbeginning，oncemorepressingRazumihin’shands，butRaskolnikovinterruptedheragain。

“Ican’thaveit！Ican’thaveit！”herepeatedirritably，“don’tworryme！Enough，goaway…Ican’tstandit！”

“Come，mamma，comeoutoftheroomatleastforaminute，”Douniawhisperedindismay；“wearedistressinghim，that’sevident。”

“Mayn’tIlookathimafterthreeyears？”weptPulcheriaAlexandrovna。

“Stay，”hestoppedthemagain，“youkeepinterruptingme，andmyideasgetmuddled。…HaveyouseenLuzhin？”

“No，Rodya，butheknowsalreadyofourarrival。Wehaveheard，Rodya，thatPyotrPetrovitchwassokindastovisityoutoday，”PulcheriaAlexandrovnaaddedsomewhattimidly。

“Yes…hewassokind…Dounia，IpromisedLuzhinI’dthrowhimdownstairsandtoldhimtogotohell。…”

“Rodya，whatareyousaying！Surely，youdon’tmeantotellus…”PulcheriaAlexandrovnabeganinalarm，butshestopped，lookingatDounia。

AvdotyaRomanovnawaslookingattentivelyatherbrother，waitingforwhatwouldcomenext。BothofthemhadheardofthequarrelfromNastasya，sofarasshehadsucceededinunderstandingandreportingit，andwereinpainfulperplexityandsuspense。

“Dounia，”Raskolnikovcontinuedwithaneffort，“Idon’twantthatmarriage，soatthefirstopportunityto-morrowyoumustrefuseLuzhin，sothatwemayneverhearhisnameagain。”

“GoodHeavens！”criedPulcheriaAlexandrovna。

“Brother，thinkwhatyouaresaying！”AvdotyaRomanovnabeganimpetuously，butimmediatelycheckedherself。“Youarenotfittotalknow，perhaps；youaretired，”sheaddedgently。

“YouthinkIamdelirious？No…YouaremarryingLuzhinformysake。ButIwon’tacceptthesacrifice。Andsowritealetterbeforeto-morrow，torefusehim…Letmereaditinthemorningandthatwillbetheendofit！”

“ThatIcan’tdo！”thegirlcried，offended，“whatrighthaveyou…”

“Dounia，youarehasty，too，bequiet，to-morrow…Don’tyousee…”themotherinterposedindismay。“Bettercomeaway！”

“Heisraving，”Razumihincriedtipsily，“orhowwouldhedare！To-morrowallthisnonsensewillbeover…to-dayhecertainlydiddrivehimaway。Thatwasso。AndLuzhingotangry，too。…Hemadespeecheshere，wantedtoshowoffhislearningandhewentoutcrest-fallen。…”

“Thenit’strue？”criedPulcheriaAlexandrovna。

“Good-byetillto-morrow，brother，”saidDouniacompassionately—“letusgo，mother…Good-bye，Rodya。”

“Doyouhear，sister，”herepeatedafterthem，makingalasteffort，“Iamnotdelirious；thismarriageis—aninfamy。Letmeactlikeascoundrel，butyoumustn’t…oneisenough…andthoughIamascoundrel，Iwouldn’townsuchasister。It’smeorLuzhin！Gonow。…”

“Butyou’reoutofyourmind！Despot！”roaredRazumihin；butRaskolnikovdidnotandperhapscouldnotanswer。Helaydownonthesofa，andturnedtothewall，utterlyexhausted。AvdotyaRomanovnalookedwithinterestatRazumihin；herblackeyesflashed；Razumihinpositivelystartedatherglance。

PulcheriaAlexandrovnastoodoverwhelmed。

“Nothingwouldinducemetogo，”shewhisperedindespairtoRazumihin。“Iwillstaysomewherehere…escortDouniahome。”

“You’llspoileverything，”Razumihinansweredinthesamewhisper，losingpatience—“comeoutontothestairs，anyway。Nastasya，showalight！Iassureyou，”hewentoninahalfwhisperonthestairs—“thathewasalmostbeatingthedoctorandmethisafternoon！Doyouunderstand？Thedoctorhimself！Evenhegavewayandlefthim，soasnottoirritatehim。Iremaineddownstairsonguard，buthedressedatonceandslippedoff。Andhewillslipoffagainifyouirritatehim，atthistimeofnight，andwilldohimselfsomemischief。…”

“Whatareyousaying？”

“AndAvdotyaRomanovnacan’tpossiblybeleftinthoselodgingswithoutyou。Justthinkwhereyouarestaying！ThatblackguardPyotrPetrovitchcouldn’tfindyoubetterlodgings…ButyouknowI’vehadalittletodrink，andthat’swhatmakesme…swear；don’tmindit。…”

“ButI’llgotothelandladyhere，”PulcheriaAlexandrovnainsisted，“IllbeseechhertofindsomecornerforDouniaandmeforthenight。Ican’tleavehimlikethat，Icannot！”

Thisconversationtookplaceonthelandingjustbeforethelandlady’sdoor。Nastasyalightedthemfromastepbelow。Razumihinwasinextraordinaryexcitement。Halfanhourearlier，whilehewasbringingRaskolnikovhome，hehadindeedtalkedtoofreely，buthewasawareofithimself，andhisheadwasclearinspiteofthevastquantitieshehadimbibed。Nowhewasinastateborderingonecstasy，andallthathehaddrunkseemedtoflytohisheadwithredoubledeffect。Hestoodwiththetwoladies，seizingbothbytheirhands，persuadingthem，andgivingthemreasonswithastonishingplainnessofspeech，andatalmosteverywordheuttered，probablytoemphasisehisarguments，hesqueezedtheirhandspainfullyasinavise。HestaredatAvdotyaRomanovnawithouttheleastregardforgoodmanners。Theysometimespulledtheirhandsoutofhishugebonypaws，butfarfromnoticingwhatwasthematter，hedrewthemalltheclosertohim。Ifthey’dtoldhimtojumpheadforemostfromthestaircase，hewouldhavedoneitwithoutthoughtorhesitationintheirservice。ThoughPulcheriaAlexandrovnafeltthattheyoungmanwasreallytooeccentricandpinchedherhandtoomuch，inheranxietyoverherRodyashelookedonhispresenceasprovidential，andwasunwillingtonoticeallhispeculiarities。ButthoughAvdotyaRomanovnasharedheranxiety，andwasnotoftimorousdisposition，shecouldnotseetheglowinglightinhiseyeswithoutwonderandalmostalarm。ItwasonlytheunboundedconfidenceinspiredbyNastasya’saccountofherbrother’squeerfriend，whichpreventedherfromtryingtorunawayfromhim，andtopersuadehermothertodothesame。Sherealised，too，thatevenrunningawaywasperhapsimpossiblenow。Tenminuteslater，however，shewasconsiderablyreassured；itwascharacteristicofRazumihinthatheshowedhistruenatureatonce，whatevermoodhemightbein，sothatpeoplequicklysawthesortofmantheyhadtodealwith。

“Youcan’tgotothelandlady，that’sperfectnonsense！”hecried。“Ifyoustay，thoughyouarehismother，you’lldrivehimtoafrenzy，andthengoodnessknowswhatwillhappen！Listen，I’lltellyouwhatI’lldo:Nastasyawillstaywithhimnow，andI’llconductyoubothhome，youcan’tbeinthestreetsalone；Petersburgisanawfulplaceinthatway。…Butnomatter！ThenI’llrunstraightbackhereandaquarterofanhourlater，onmywordofhonour，I’llbringyounewshowheis，whetherheisasleep，andallthat。Then，listen！ThenI’llrunhomeinatwinkling—I’vealotoffriendsthere，alldrunk—I’llfetchZossimov—that’sthedoctorwhoislookingafterhim，heisthere，too，butheisnotdrunk；heisnotdrunk，heisneverdrunk！I’lldraghimtoRodya，andthentoyou，sothatyou’llgettworeportsinthehour—fromthedoctor，youunderstand，fromthedoctorhimself，that’saverydifferentthingfrommyaccountofhim！Ifthere’sanythingwrong，IswearI’llbringyouheremyself，but，ifit’sallright，yougotobed。AndI’llspendthenighthere，inthepassage，hewon’thearme，andI’lltellZossimovtosleepatthelandlady’s，tobeathand。Whichisbetterforhim:youorthedoctor？Socomehomethen！Butthelandladyisoutofthequestion；it’sallrightforme，butit’soutofthequestionforyou:shewouldn’ttakeyou，forshe’s…forshe’safool…She’dbejealousonmyaccountofAvdotyaRomanovnaandofyou，too，ifyouwanttoknow…ofAvdotyaRomanovnacertainly。Sheisanabsolutely，absolutelyunaccountablecharacter！ButIamafool，too！…Nomatter！Comealong！Doyoutrustme？Come，doyoutrustmeornot？”

“Letusgo，mother，”saidAvdotyaRomanovna，“hewillcertainlydowhathehaspromised。HehassavedRodyaalready，andifthedoctorreallywillconsenttospendthenighthere，whatcouldbebetter？”

“Yousee，you…you…understandme，becauseyouareanangel！”Razumihincriedinecstasy，“letusgo！Nastasya！Flyupstairsandsitwithhimwithalight；I’llcomeinaquarterofanhour。”

ThoughPulcheriaAlexandrovnawasnotperfectlyconvinced，shemadenofurtherresistance。Razumihingaveanarmtoeachanddrewthemdownthestairs。Hestillmadeheruneasy，asthoughhewascompetentandgood-natured，washecapableofcarryingouthispromise？Heseemedinsuchacondition。…

“Ah，IseeyouthinkIaminsuchacondition！”Razumihinbrokeinuponherthoughts，guessingthem，ashestrolledalongthepavementwithhugesteps，sothatthetwoladiescouldhardlykeepupwithhim，afacthedidnotobserve，however。“Nonsense！Thatis…Iamdrunklikeafool，butthat’snotit；Iamnotdrunkfromwine。It’sseeingyouhasturnedmyhead…Butdon’tmindme！Don’ttakeanynotice:Iamtalkingnonsense，Iamnotworthyofyou。…Iamutterlyunworthyofyou！TheminuteI’vetakenyouhome，I’llpouracoupleofpailfulsofwaterovermyheadinthegutterhere，andthenIshallbeallright。…IfonlyyouknewhowIloveyouboth！Don’tlaugh，anddon’tbeangry！Youmaybeangrywithanyone，butnotwithme！Iamhisfriend，andthereforeIamyourfriend，too，Iwanttobe…Ihadapresentiment…yeartherewasamoment…thoughitwasn’tapresentimentreally，foryouseemtohavefallenfromheaven。AndIexpectIshan’tsleepallnight…Zossimovwasafraidalittletimeagothathewouldgomad…that’swhyhemustn’tbeirritated。”

“Whatdoyousay？”criedthemother。

“Didthedoctorreallysaythat？”askedAvdotyaRomanovna，alarmed。

“Yes，butit’snotso，notabitofit。Hegavehimsomemedicine，apowder，Isawit，andthenyourcominghere。…Ah！Itwouldhavebeenbetterifyouhadcometo-morrow。It’sagoodthingwewentaway。AndinanhourZossimovhimselfwillreporttoyouabouteverything。Heisnotdrunk！AndIshan’tbedrunk。…Andwhatmademegetsotight？Becausetheygotmeintoanargument，damnthem！I’veswornnevertoargue！Theytalksuchtrash！Ialmostcametoblows！I’veleftmyuncletopreside。Wouldyoubelieve，theyinsistoncompleteabsenceofindividualismandthat’sjustwhattheyrelish！Nottobethemselves，tobeasunlikethemselvesastheycan。That’swhattheyregardasthehighestpointofprogress。Ifonlytheirnonsenseweretheirown，butasitis…”

“Listen！”PulcheriaAlexandrovnainterruptedtimidly，butitonlyaddedfueltotheflames。

“Whatdoyouthink？”shoutedRazumihin，louderthanever，“youthinkIamattackingthemfortalkingnonsense？Notabit！Ilikethemtotalknonsense。That’sman’soneprivilegeoverallcreation。Througherroryoucometothetruth！IamamanbecauseIerr！Youneverreachanytruthwithoutmakingfourteenmistakesandverylikelyahundredandfourteen。Andafinething，too，initsway；butwecan’tevenmakemistakesonourownaccount！Talknonsense，buttalkyourownnonsense，andI’llkissyouforit。Togowronginone’sownwayisbetterthantogorightinsomeoneelse’s。Inthefirstcaseyouareaman，inthesecondyou’renobetterthanabird。Truthwon’tescapeyou，butlifecanbecramped。Therehavebeenexamples。Andwhatarewedoingnow？Inscience，development，thought，invention，ideals，aims，liberalism，judgment，experienceandeverything，everything，everything，wearestillinthepreparatoryclassatschool。Weprefertoliveonotherpeople’sideas，it’swhatweareusedto！AmIright，amIright？”criedRazumihin，pressingandshakingthetwoladies’hands。

“Oh，mercy，Idonotknow，”criedpoorPulcheriaAlexandrovna。

“Yes，yes…thoughIdon’tagreewithyouineverything，”addedAvdotyaRomanovnaearnestlyandatonceutteredacry，forhesqueezedherhandsopainfully。

“Yes，yousayyes…wellafterthatyou…you…”hecriedinatransport，“youareafountofgoodness，purity，sense…andperfection。Givemeyourhand…yougivemeyours，too！Iwanttokissyourhandshereatonce，onmyknees…”andhefellonhiskneesonthepavement，fortunatelyatthattimedeserted。

“Leaveoff，Ientreatyou，whatareyoudoing？”PulcheriaAlexandrovnacried，greatlydistressed。

“Getup，getup！”saidDounialaughing，thoughshe，too，wasupset。

“Notforanythingtillyouletmekissyourhands！That’sit！Enough！Igetupandwe’llgoon！Iamalucklessfool，Iamunworthyofyouanddrunk…andIamashamed。…Iamnotworthytoloveyou，buttodohomagetoyouisthedutyofeverymanwhoisnotaperfectbeast！AndI’vedonehomage。…Hereareyourlodgings，andforthataloneRodyawasrightindrivingyourPyotrPetrovitchaway。…Howdarehe！howdareheputyouinsuchlodgings！It’sascandal！Doyouknowthesortofpeopletheytakeinhere？Andyouhisbetrothed！Youarehisbetrothed？Yes？Well，then，I’lltellyou，yourfianceisascoundrel。”

“Excuseme，Mr。Razumihin，youareforgetting…”PulcheriaAlexandrovnawasbeginning。

“Yes，yes，youareright，Ididforgetmyself，Iamashamedofit，”Razumihinmadehastetoapologise。“But…butyoucan’tbeangrywithmeforspeakingso！ForIspeaksincerelyandnotbecause…hm，hm！Thatwouldbedisgraceful；infactnotbecauseI’min…hm！Well，anyway，Iwon’tsaywhy，Idaren’t。…Butweallsawto-daywhenhecameinthatthatmanisnotofoursort。Notbecausehehadhishaircurledatthebarber’s，notbecausehewasinsuchahurrytoshowhiswit，butbecauseheisaspy，aspeculator，becauseheisaskin-flintandabuffoon。That’sevident。Doyouthinkhimclever？No，heisafool，afool。Andisheamatchforyou？Goodheavens！Doyousee，ladies？”hestoppedsuddenlyonthewayupstairstotheirrooms，“thoughallmyfriendstherearedrunk，yettheyareallhonest，andthoughwedotalkalotoftrash，andIdo，too，yetweshalltalkourwaytothetruthatlast，forweareontherightpath，whilePyotrPetrovitch…isnotontherightpath。ThoughI’vebeencallingthemallsortsofnamesjustnow，Idorespectthemall…thoughIdon’trespectZametov，Ilikehim，forheisapuppy，andthatbullockZossimov，becauseheisanhonestmanandknowshiswork。Butenough，it’sallsaidandforgiven。Isitforgiven？Well，then，let’sgoon。Iknowthiscorridor，I’vebeenhere，therewasascandalhereatNumber3。…Whereareyouhere？Whichnumber？eight？Well，lockyourselvesinforthenight，then。Don’tletanybodyin。InaquarterofanhourI’llcomebackwithnews，andhalfanhourlaterI’llbringZossimov，you’llsee！Good-bye，I’llrun。”

“Goodheavens，Dounia，whatisgoingtohappen？”saidPulcheriaAlexandrovna，addressingherdaughterwithanxietyanddismay。

“Don’tworryyourself，mother，”saidDounia，takingoffherhatandcape。“Godhassentthisgentlemantoouraid，thoughhehascomefromadrinkingparty。Wecandependonhim，Iassureyou。AndallthathehasdoneforRodya。…”

“Ah。Dounia，goodnessknowswhetherhewillcome！HowcouldIbringmyselftoleaveRodya？…Andhowdifferent，howdifferentIhadfanciedourmeeting！Howsullenhewas，asthoughnotpleasedtoseeus。…”

Tearscameintohereyes。

“No，it’snotthat，mother。Youdidn’tsee，youwerecryingallthetime。Heisquiteunhingedbyseriousillness—that’sthereason。”

“Ah，thatillness！Whatwillhappen，whatwillhappen？Andhowhetalkedtoyou，Dounia！”saidthemother，lookingtimidlyatherdaughter，tryingtoreadherthoughtsand，alreadyhalfconsoledbyDounia’sstandingupforherbrother，whichmeantthatshehadalreadyforgivenhim。“Iamsurehewillthinkbetterofitto-morrow，”sheadded，probingherfurther。

“AndIamsurethathewillsaythesameto-morrow…aboutthat，”AvdotyaRomanovnasaidfinally。And，ofcourse，therewasnogoingbeyondthat，forthiswasapointwhichPulcheriaAlexandrovnawasafraidtodiscuss。Douniawentupandkissedhermother。Thelatterwarmlyembracedherwithoutspeaking。ThenshesatdowntowaitanxiouslyforRazumihin’sreturn，timidlywatchingherdaughterwhowalkedupanddowntheroomwithherarmsfolded，lostinthought。ThiswalkingupanddownwhenshewasthinkingwasahabitofAvdotyaRomanovna’sandthemotherwasalwaysafraidtobreakinonherdaughter’smoodatsuchmoments。

Razumihin，ofcourse，wasridiculousinhissuddendrunkeninfatuationforAvdotyaRomanovna。Yetapartfromhiseccentriccondition，manypeoplewouldhavethoughtitjustifiediftheyhadseenAvdotyaRomanovna，especiallyatthatmomentwhenshewaswalkingtoandfrowithfoldedarms，pensiveandmelancholy。AvdotyaRomanovnawasremarkablygoodlooking；shewastall，strikinglywell-proportioned，strongandself-reliant—thelatterqualitywasapparentineverygesture，thoughitdidnotintheleastdetractfromthegraceandsoftnessofhermovements。Infacesheresembledherbrother，butshemightbedescribedasreallybeautiful。Herhairwasdarkbrown，alittlelighterthanherbrother’s；therewasaproudlightinheralmostblackeyesandyetattimesalookofextraordinarykindness。Shewaspale，butitwasahealthypallor；herfacewasradiantwithfreshnessandvigour。Hermouthwasrathersmall；thefullredlowerlipprojectedalittleasdidherchin；itwastheonlyirregularityinherbeautifulface，butitgaveitapeculiarlyindividualandalmosthaughtyexpression。Herfacewasalwaysmoreseriousandthoughtfulthangay；buthowwellsmiles，howwellyouthful，lighthearted，irresponsible，laughtersuitedherface！Itwasnaturalenoughthatawarm，open，simple-hearted，honestgiantlikeRazumihin，whohadneverseenanyonelikeherandwasnotquitesoberatthetime，shouldlosehisheadimmediately。Besides，aschancewouldhaveit，hesawDouniaforthefirsttimetransfiguredbyherloveforherbrotherandherjoyatmeetinghim。Afterwardshesawherlowerlipquiverwithindignationatherbrother’sinsolent，cruelandungratefulwords—andhisfatewassealed。

Hehadspokenthetruth，moreover，whenheblurtedoutinhisdrunkentalkonthestairsthatPraskovyaPavlovna，Raskolnikov’seccentriclandlady，wouldbejealousofPulcheriaAlexandrovnaaswellasofAvdotyaRomanovnaonhisaccount。AlthoughPulcheriaAlexandrovnawasforty-three，herfacestillretainedtracesofherformerbeauty；shelookedmuchyoungerthanherage，indeed，whichisalmostalwaysthecasewithwomenwhoretainserenityofspirit，sensitivenessandpuresincerewarmthofhearttooldage。Wemayaddinparenthesisthattopreserveallthisistheonlymeansofretainingbeautytooldage。Herhairhadbeguntogrowgreyandthin，therehadlongbeenlittlecrow’sfootwrinklesroundhereyes，hercheekswerehollowandsunkenfromanxietyandgrief，andyetitwasahandsomeface。ShewasDouniaoveragain，twentyyearsolder，butwithouttheprojectingunderlip。PulcheriaAlexandrovnawasemotional，butnotsentimental，timidandyielding，butonlytoacertainpoint。Shecouldgivewayandacceptagreatdealevenofwhatwascontrarytoherconvictions，buttherewasacertainbarrierfixedbyhonesty，principleandthedeepestconvictionswhichnothingwouldinducehertocross。

ExactlytwentyminutesafterRazumihin’sdeparture，therecametwosubduedbuthurriedknocksatthedoor:hehadcomeback。

“Iwon’tcomein，Ihaven’ttime，”hehastenedtosaywhenthedoorwasopened。“Hesleepslikeatop，soundly，quietly，andGodgranthemaysleeptenhours。Nastasya’swithhim；ItoldhernottoleavetillIcame。NowIamfetchingZossimov，hewillreporttoyouandthenyou’dbetterturnin；Icanseeyouaretootiredtodoanything。…”

Andheranoffdownthecorridor。

“Whataverycompetentand…devotedyoungman！”criedPulcheriaAlexandrovnaexceedinglydelighted。

“Heseemsasplendidperson！”AvdotyaRomanovnarepliedwithsomewarmth，resumingherwalkupanddowntheroom。

Itwasnearlyanhourlaterwhentheyheardfootstepsinthecorridorandanotherknockatthedoor。BothwomenwaitedthistimecompletelyrelyingonRazumihin’spromise；heactuallyhadsucceededinbringingZossimov。ZossimovhadagreedatoncetodesertthedrinkingpartytogotoRaskolnikov’s，buthecamereluctantlyandwiththegreatestsuspiciontoseetheladies，mistrustingRazumihininhisexhilaratedcondition。Buthisvanitywasatoncereassuredandflattered；hesawthattheywerereallyexpectinghimasanoracle。HestayedjusttenminutesandsucceededincompletelyconvincingandcomfortingPulcheriaAlexandrovna。Hespokewithmarkedsympathy，butwiththereserveandextremeseriousnessofayoungdoctoratanimportantconsultation。Hedidnotutterawordonanyothersubjectanddidnotdisplaytheslightestdesiretoenterintomorepersonalrelationswiththetwoladies。RemarkingathisfirstentrancethedazzlingbeautyofAvdotyaRomanovna，heendeavourednottonoticeheratallduringhisvisitandaddressedhimselfsolelytoPulcheriaAlexandrovna。Allthisgavehimextraordinaryinwardsatisfaction。Hedeclaredthathethoughttheinvalidatthismomentgoingonverysatisfactorily。Accordingtohisobservationsthepatient’sillnesswasduepartlytohisunfortunatematerialsurroundingsduringthelastfewmonths，butithadpartlyalsoamoralorigin，“was，sotospeak，theproductofseveralmaterialandmoralinfluences，anxieties，apprehensions，troubles，certainideas…andsoon。”NoticingstealthilythatAvdotyaRomanovnawasfollowinghiswordswithcloseattention，Zossimovallowedhimselftoenlargeonthistheme。OnPulcheriaAlexandrovna’sanxiouslyandtimidlyinquiringasto“somesuspicionofinsanity，”herepliedwithacomposedandcandidsmilethathiswordshadbeenexaggerated；thatcertainlythepatienthadsomefixedidea，somethingapproachingamonomania—he，Zossimov，wasnowparticularlystudyingthisinterestingbranchofmedicine—butthatitmustberecollectedthatuntilto-daythepatienthadbeenindeliriumand…andthatnodoubtthepresenceofhisfamilywouldhaveafavourableeffectonhisrecoveryanddistracthismind，“ifonlyallfreshshockscanbeavoided，”headdedsignificantly。Thenhegotup，tookleavewithanimpressiveandaffablebow，whileblessings，warmgratitude，andentreatieswereshowereduponhim，andAvdotyaRomanovnaspontaneouslyofferedherhandtohim。Hewentoutexceedinglypleasedwithhisvisitandstillmoresowithhimself。

“We’lltalkto-morrow；gotobedatonce！”Razumihinsaidinconclusion，followingZossimovout。“I’llbewithyouto-morrowmorningasearlyaspossiblewithmyreport。”

“That’safetchinglittlegirl，AvdotyaRomanovna，”remarkedZossimov，almostlickinghislipsastheybothcameoutintothestreet。

“Fetching？Yousaidfetching？”roaredRazumihinandheflewatZossimovandseizedhimbythethroat。“Ifyoueverdare。…Doyouunderstand？Doyouunderstand？”heshouted，shakinghimbythecollarandsqueezinghimagainstthewall。“Doyouhear？”

“Letmego，youdrunkendevil，”saidZossimov，strugglingandwhenhehadlethimgo，hestaredathimandwentoffintoasuddenguffaw。Razumihinstoodfacinghimingloomyandearnestreflection。

“Ofcourse，Iamanass，”heobserved，sombreasastormcloud，“butstill…youareanother。”

“No，brother，notatallsuchanother。Iamnotdreamingofanyfolly。”

TheywalkedalonginsilenceandonlywhentheywereclosetoRaskolnikov’slodgings，Razumihinbrokethesilenceinconsiderableanxiety。

“Listen，”hesaid，“you’reafirst-ratefellow，butamongyourotherfailings，you’realoosefish，thatIknow，andadirtyone，too。Youareafeeble，nervouswretch，andamassofwhims，you’regettingfatandlazyandcan’tdenyyourselfanything—andIcallthatdirtybecauseitleadsonestraightintothedirt。You’veletyourselfgetsoslackthatIdon’tknowhowitisyouarestillagood，evenadevoteddoctor。You—adoctor—sleeponafeatherbedandgetupatnighttoyourpatients！Inanotherthreeorfouryearsyouwon’tgetupforyourpatients…Buthangitall，that’snotthepoint！…Youaregoingtospendto-nightinthelandlady’sflathere。(HardworkI’vehadtopersuadeher！)AndI’llbeinthekitchen。Sohere’sachanceforyoutogettoknowherbetter。…It’snotasyouthink！There’snotatraceofanythingofthesort，brother…！”

“ButIdon’tthink！”

“Hereyouhavemodesty，brother，silence，bashfulness，asavagevirtue…andyetshe’ssighingandmeltinglikewax，simplymelting！Savemefromher，byallthat’sunholy！She’smostprepossessing…I’llrepayyou，I’lldoanything。…”

Zossimovlaughedmoreviolentlythanever。

“Well，youaresmitten！ButwhatamItodowithher？”

“Itwon’tbemuchtrouble，Iassureyou。Talkanyrotyouliketoher，aslongasyousitbyherandtalk。You’readoctor，too；trycuringherofsomething。Iswearyouwon’tregretit。Shehasapiano，andyouknow，Istrumalittle。Ihaveasongthere，agenuineRussianone:‘Ishedhottears。’Shelikesthegenuinearticle—andwell，itallbeganwiththatsong；Nowyou’rearegularperformer，amaitre，aRubinstein。…Iassureyou，youwon’tregretit！”

“Buthaveyoumadehersomepromise？Somethingsigned？Apromiseofmarriage，perhaps？”

“Nothing，nothing，absolutelynothingofthekind！Besidessheisnotthatsortatall。…Tchebarovtriedthat。…”

“Wellthen，dropher！”

“ButIcan’tdropherlikethat！”

“Whycan’tyou？”

“Well，Ican’t，that’sallaboutit！There’sanelementofattractionhere，brother。”

“Thenwhyhaveyoufascinatedher？”

“Ihaven’tfascinatedher；perhapsIwasfascinatedmyselfinmyfolly。Butshewon’tcareastrawwhetherit’syouorI，solongassomebodysitsbesideher，sighing。…Ican’texplaintheposition，brother…lookhere，youaregoodatmathematics，andworkingatitnow…beginteachinghertheintegralcalculus；uponmysoul，I’mnotjoking，I’minearnest，it’llbejustthesametoher。Shewillgazeatyouandsighforawholeyeartogether。ItalkedtoheroncefortwodaysatatimeaboutthePrussianHouseofLords(foronemusttalkofsomething)—shejustsighedandperspired！Andyoumustn’ttalkoflove—she’sbashfultohysterics—butjustletherseeyoucan’ttearyourselfaway—that’senough。It’sfearfullycomfortable；you’requiteathome，youcanread，sit，lieabout，write。Youmayevenventureonakiss，ifyou’recareful。”

“ButwhatdoIwantwithher？”

“Ach，Ican’tmakeyouunderstand！Yousee，youaremadeforeachother！Ihaveoftenbeenremindedofyou！…You’llcometoitintheend！Sodoesitmatterwhetherit’ssoonerorlater？There’sthefeather-bedelementhere，brother—ach！andnotonlythat！There’sanattractionhere—hereyouhavetheendoftheworld，ananchorage，aquiethaven，thenaveloftheearth，thethreefishesthatarethefoundationoftheworld，theessenceofpancakes，ofsavouryfish-pies，oftheeveningsamovar，ofsoftsighsandwarmshawls，andhotstovestosleepon—assnugasthoughyouweredead，andyetyou’realive—theadvantagesofbothatonce！Well，hangit，brother，whatstuffI’mtalking，it’sbedtime！Listen。Isometimeswakeupatnight；soI’llgoinandlookathim。Butthere’snoneed，it’sallright。Don’tyouworryyourself，yetifyoulike，youmightjustlookinonce，too。Butifyounoticeanything—deliriumorfever—wakemeatonce。Buttherecan’tbe。…”