第19章

“Alittlesilvergoesalongwayinthiscountry，“shechuckled。

ShesentSusanbacktofetchanothercup。

“Theyhavesuchexcellentbiscuitshere，“shesaid，contemplatingaplateful。“Notsweetbiscuits，whichIdon’tlike——drybiscuits……Haveyoubeensketching？“

“Oh，I’vedonetwoorthreelittledaubs，“saidMrs。Elliot，speakingratherlouderthanusual。“Butit’ssodifficultafterOxfordshire，wheretherearesomanytrees。Thelight’ssostronghere。

Somepeopleadmireit，Iknow，butIfinditveryfatiguing。“

“Ireallydon’tneedcooking，Susan，“saidMrs。Paley，whenherniecereturned。“Imusttroubleyoutomoveme。“Everythinghadtobemoved。Finallytheoldladywasplacedsothatthelightwaveredoverher，asthoughshewereafishinanet。Susanpouredouttea，andwasjustremarkingthattheywerehavinghotweatherinWiltshiretoo，whenMr。Venningaskedwhetherhemightjointhem。

“It’ssonicetofindayoungmanwhodoesn’tdespisetea，“

saidMrs。Paley，regaininghergoodhumour。“Oneofmynephewstheotherdayaskedforaglassofsherry——atfiveo’clock！I

toldhimhecouldgetitatthepublichouseroundthecorner，butnotinmydrawingroom。“

“I’drathergowithoutlunchthantea，“saidMr。Venning。

“That’snotstrictlytrue。Iwantboth。“

Mr。Venningwasadarkyoungman，aboutthirty-twoyearsofage，veryslapdashandconfidentinhismanner，althoughatthismomentobviouslyalittleexcited。HisfriendMr。Perrottwasabarrister，andasMr。PerrottrefusedtogoanywherewithoutMr。Venningitwasnecessary，whenMr。PerrottcametoSantaMarinaaboutaCompany，forMr。Venningtocometoo。Hewasabarristeralso，butheloathedaprofessionwhichkepthimindoorsoverbooks，anddirectlyhiswidowedmotherdiedhewasgoing，soheconfidedtoSusan，totakeupflyingseriously，andbecomepartnerinalargebusinessformakingaeroplanes。Thetalkrambledon。Itdealt，ofcourse，withthebeautiesandsingularitiesoftheplace，thestreets，thepeople，andthequantitiesofunownedyellowdogs。

“Don’tyouthinkitdreadfullycruelthewaytheytreatdogsinthiscountry？“askedMrs。Paley。

“I’dhave’emallshot，“saidMr。Venning。

“Oh，butthedarlingpuppies，“saidSusan。

“Jollylittlechaps，“saidMr。Venning。“Lookhere，you’vegotnothingtoeat。“AgreatwedgeofcakewashandedSusanonthepointofatremblingknife。Herhandtrembledtooasshetookit。

“Ihavesuchadeardogathome，“saidMrs。Elliot。

“Myparrotcan’tstanddogs，“saidMrs。Paley，withtheairofonemakingaconfidence。“Ialwayssuspectthathe(orshe)

wasteasedbyadogwhenIwasabroad。“

“Youdidn’tgetfarthismorning，MissWarrington，“saidMr。Venning。

“Itwashot，“sheanswered。Theirconversationbecameprivate，owingtoMrs。Paley’sdeafnessandthelongsadhistorywhichMrs。Elliothadembarkeduponofawire-hairedterrier，whitewithjustoneblackspot，belongingtoanuncleofhers，whichhadcommittedsuicide。“Animalsdocommitsuicide，“

shesighed，asifsheassertedapainfulfact。

“Couldn’tweexplorethetownthisevening？“Mr。Venningsuggested。

“Myaunt——“Susanbegan。

“Youdeserveaholiday，“hesaid。“You’realwaysdoingthingsforotherpeople。“

“Butthat’smylife，“shesaid，undercoverofrefillingtheteapot。

“That’snoone’slife，“hereturned，“noyoungperson’s。You’llcome？“

“Ishouldliketocome，“shemurmured。

AtthismomentMrs。Elliotlookedupandexclaimed，“Oh，Hugh！

He’sbringingsomeone，“sheadded。

“Hewouldlikesometea，“saidMrs。Paley。“Susan，runandgetsomecups——therearethetwoyoungmen。“

“We’rethirstingfortea，“saidMr。Elliot。“YouknowMr。Ambrose，Hilda？Wemetonthehill。“

“Hedraggedmein，“saidRidley，“orIshouldhavebeenashamed。

I’mdustyanddirtyanddisagreeable。“Hepointedtohisbootswhichwerewhitewithdust，whileadejectedflowerdroopinginhisbuttonhole，likeanexhaustedanimaloveragate，addedtotheeffectoflengthanduntidiness。Hewasintroducedtotheothers。

Mr。HewetandMr。Hirstbroughtchairs，andteabeganagain，Susanpouringcascadesofwaterfrompottopot，alwayscheerfully，andwiththecompetenceoflonguse。

“Mywife’sbrother，“RidleyexplainedtoHilda，whomhefailedtoremember，“hasahousehere，whichhehaslentus。

IwassittingonarockthinkingofnothingatallwhenElliotstarteduplikeafairyinapantomime。“

“Ourchickengotintothesalt，“HewetsaiddolefullytoSusan。

“Norisittruethatbananasincludemoistureaswellassustenance。

Hirstwasalreadydrinking。

“We’vebeencursingyou，“saidRidleyinanswertoMrs。Elliot’skindenquiriesabouthiswife。“Youtouristseatupalltheeggs，Helentellsme。That’saneye-soretoo“——henoddedhisheadatthehotel。“Disgustingluxury，Icallit。Welivewithpigsinthedrawing-room。“

“Thefoodisnotatallwhatitoughttobe，consideringtheprice，“

saidMrs。Paleyseriously。“Butunlessonegoestoahotelwhereisonetogoto？“

“Stayathome，“saidRidley。“IoftenwishIhad！Everyoneoughttostayathome。But，ofcourse，theywon’t。“

Mrs。PaleyconceivedacertaingrudgeagainstRidley，whoseemedtobecriticisingherhabitsafteranacquaintanceoffiveminutes。

“Ibelieveinforeigntravelmyself，“shestated，“ifoneknowsone’snativeland，whichIthinkIcanhonestlysayIdo。IshouldnotallowanyonetotraveluntiltheyhadvisitedKentandDorsetshire——

Kentforthehops，andDorsetshireforitsoldstonecottages。

Thereisnothingtocomparewiththemhere。“

“Yes——Ialwaysthinkthatsomepeopleliketheflatandotherpeoplelikethedowns，“saidMrs。Elliotrathervaguely。

Hirst，whohadbeeneatinganddrinkingwithoutinterruption，nowlitacigarette，andobserved，“Oh，butwe’reallagreedbythistimethatnature’samistake。She’seitherveryugly，appallinglyuncomfortable，orabsolutelyterrifying。Idon’tknowwhichalarmsmemost——acoworatree。Ioncemetacowinafieldbynight。

Thecreaturelookedatme。Iassureyouitturnedmyhairgrey。

It’sadisgracethattheanimalsshouldbeallowedtogoatlarge。“

“Andwhatdidthecowthinkof_him_？“VenningmumbledtoSusan，whoimmediatelydecidedinherownmindthatMr。Hirstwasadreadfulyoungman，andthatalthoughhehadsuchanairofbeingcleverheprobablywasn’tascleverasArthur，inthewaysthatreallymatter。

“Wasn’titWildewhodiscoveredthefactthatnaturemakesnoallowanceforhip-bones？“enquiredHughlingElliot。HeknewbythistimeexactlywhatscholarshipsanddistinctionHirstenjoyed，andhadformedaveryhighopinionofhiscapacities。

ButHirstmerelydrewhislipstogetherverytightlyandmadenoreply。

Ridleyconjecturedthatitwasnowpermissibleforhimtotakehisleave。PolitenessrequiredhimtothankMrs。Elliotforhistea，andtoadd，withawaveofhishand，“Youmustcomeupandseeus。“

ThewaveincludedbothHirstandHewet，andHewetanswered，“Ishouldlikeitimmensely。“

Thepartybrokeup，andSusan，whohadneverfeltsohappyinherlife，wasjustabouttostartforherwalkinthetownwithArthur，whenMrs。Paleybeckonedherback。ShecouldnotunderstandfromthebookhowDoubleDemonpatienceisplayed；andsuggestedthatiftheysatdownandworkeditouttogetheritwouldfillupthetimenicelybeforedinner。

AmongthepromiseswhichMrs。Ambrosehadmadehernieceshouldshestaywasaroomcutofffromtherestofthehouse，large，private——

aroominwhichshecouldplay，read，think，defytheworld，afortressaswellasasanctuary。Rooms，sheknew，becamemorelikeworldsthanroomsattheageoftwenty-four。Herjudgmentwascorrect，andwhensheshutthedoorRachelenteredanenchantedplace，wherethepoetssangandthingsfellintotheirrightproportions。

Somedaysafterthevisionofthehotelbynightshewassittingalone，sunkinanarm-chair，readingabrightly-coveredredvolumeletteredontheback_Works__of__Henrik__Ibsen_。Musicwasopenonthepiano，andbooksofmusicroseintwojaggedpillarsonthefloor；

butforthemomentmusicwasdeserted。

Farfromlookingboredorabsent-minded，hereyeswereconcentratedalmoststernlyuponthepage，andfromherbreathing，whichwasslowbutrepressed，itcouldbeseenthatherwholebodywasconstrainedbytheworkingofhermind。Atlastsheshutthebooksharply，layback，anddrewadeepbreath，expressiveofthewonderwhichalwaysmarksthetransitionfromtheimaginaryworldtotherealworld。

“WhatIwanttoknow，“shesaidaloud，“isthis:Whatisthetruth？

What’sthetruthofitall？“Shewasspeakingpartlyasherself，andpartlyastheheroineoftheplayshehadjustread。

Thelandscapeoutside，becauseshehadseennothingbutprintforthespaceoftwohours，nowappearedamazinglysolidandclear，butalthoughthereweremenonthehillwashingthetrunksofolivetreeswithawhiteliquid，forthemomentsheherselfwasthemostvividthinginit——anheroicstatueinthemiddleoftheforeground，dominatingtheview。Ibsen’splaysalwaysleftherinthatcondition。

Sheactedthemfordaysatatime，greatlytoHelen’samusement；

andthenitwouldbeMeredith’sturnandshebecameDianaoftheCrossways。ButHelenwasawarethatitwasnotallacting，andthatsomesortofchangewastakingplaceinthehumanbeing。

WhenRachelbecametiredoftherigidityofherposeonthebackofthechair，sheturnedround，slidcomfortablydownintoit，andgazedoutoverthefurniturethroughthewindowoppositewhichopenedonthegarden。(HermindwanderedawayfromNora，butshewentonthinkingofthingsthatthebooksuggestedtoher，ofwomenandlife。)

Duringthethreemonthsshehadbeenhereshehadmadeupconsiderably，asHelenmeantsheshould，fortimespentininterminablewalksroundshelteredgardens，andthehouseholdgossipofheraunts。

ButMrs。Ambrosewouldhavebeenthefirsttodisclaimanyinfluence，orindeedanybeliefthattoinfluencewaswithinherpower。

Shesawherlessshy，andlessserious，whichwasalltothegood，andtheviolentleapsandtheinterminablemazeswhichhadledtothatresultwereusuallynotevenguessedatbyher。Talkwasthemedicineshetrustedto，talkabouteverything，talkthatwasfree，unguarded，andascandidasahabitoftalkingwithmenmadenaturalinherowncase。Nordidsheencouragethosehabitsofunselfishnessandamiabilityfoundeduponinsinceritywhichareputatsohighavalueinmixedhouseholdsofmenandwomen。

ShedesiredthatRachelshouldthink，andforthisreasonofferedbooksanddiscouragedtooentireadependenceuponBachandBeethovenandWagner。ButwhenMrs。AmbrosewouldhavesuggestedDefoe，Maupassant，orsomespaciouschronicleoffamilylife，Rachelchosemodernbooks，booksinshinyyellowcovers，bookswithagreatdealofgildingontheback，whichweretokensinheraunt’seyesofharshwranglinganddisputesaboutfactswhichhadnosuchimportanceasthemodernsclaimedforthem。Butshedidnotinterfere。

Rachelreadwhatshechose，readingwiththecuriousliteralnessofonetowhomwrittensentencesareunfamiliar，andhandlingwordsasthoughtheyweremadeofwood，separatelyofgreatimportance，andpossessedofshapesliketablesorchairs。Inthiswayshecametoconclusions，whichhadtoberemodelledaccordingtotheadventuresoftheday，andwereindeedrecastasliberallyasanyonecoulddesire，leavingalwaysasmallgrainofbeliefbehindthem。

IbsenwassucceededbyanovelsuchasMrs。Ambrosedetested，whosepurposewastodistributetheguiltofawoman’sdownfallupontherightshoulders；apurposewhichwasachieved，ifthereader’sdiscomfortwereanyproofofit。Shethrewthebookdown，lookedoutofthewindow，turnedawayfromthewindow，andrelapsedintoanarm-chair。