第8章
Becausewewerealone,utterlyalone,“shesaidplaintivelyandstoppedshort,suddenly,recollectingitwasstillsomewhatdangeroustospeakofPyotrPetrovitch,although“wearequitehappyagain。“
“Yes,yes……Ofcourseit"sveryannoying……“Raskolnikovmutteredinreply,butwithsuchapreoccupiedandinattentiveairthatDouniagazedathiminperplexity。
“WhatelsewasitIwantedtosay,“hewentontryingtorecollect。“Oh,yes;mother,andyoutoo,Dounia,pleasedon"tthinkthatIdidn"tmeantocomeandseeyouto-dayandwaswaitingforyoutocomefirst。“
“Whatareyousaying,Rodya？”criedPulcheriaAlexandrovna。She,too,wassurprised。
“Isheansweringusasaduty？”Douniawondered。“Ishebeingreconciledandaskingforgivenessasthoughhewereperformingariteorrepeatingalesson？”
“I"veonlyjustwakedup,andwantedtogotoyou,butwasdelayedowingtomyclothes;Iforgotyesterdaytoaskher……Nastasya……towashouttheblood……I"veonlyjustdressed。“
“Blood!Whatblood？”PulcheriaAlexandrovnaaskedinalarm。
“Oh,nothing-don"tbeuneasy。ItwaswhenIwaswanderingaboutyesterday,ratherdelirious,Ichanceduponamanwhohadbeenrunover……aclerk……“
“Delirious?Butyouremembereverything！”Razumihininterrupted。
“That"strue,“Raskolnikovansweredwithspecialcarefulness。“I
remembereverythingeventotheslightestdetail,andyet-whyIdidthatandwentthereandsaidthat,Ican"tclearlyexplainnow。“
“Afamiliarphenomenon,“interposedZossimov,“actionsaresometimesperformedinamasterlyandmostcunningway,whilethedirectionoftheactionsisderangedanddependentonvariousmorbidimpressions-
it"slikeadream。“
“Perhapsit"sagoodthingreallythatheshouldthinkmealmostamadman,“thoughtRaskolnikov。
“Why,peopleinperfecthealthactinthesamewaytoo,“observedDounia,lookinguneasilyatZossimov。
“Thereissometruthinyourobservation,“thelatterreplied。“Inthatsensewearecertainlyallnotinfrequentlylikemadmen,butwiththeslightdifferencethatthederangedaresomewhatmadder,forwemustdrawaline。Anormalman,itistrue,hardlyexists。Amongdozens-perhapshundredsofthousands-hardlyoneistobemetwith。“
Attheword“madman,“carelesslydroppedbyZossimovinhischatteronhisfavouritesubject,everyonefrowned。
Raskolnikovsatseemingnottopayattention,plungedinthoughtwithastrangesmileonhispalelips。Hewasstillmeditatingonsomething。
“Well,whataboutthemanwhowasrunover?Iinterruptedyou！”
Razumihincriedhastily。
“What？”Raskolnikovseemedtowakeup。“Oh……Igotspatteredwithbloodhelpingtocarryhimtohislodging。Bytheway,mamma,Ididanunpardonablethingyesterday。Iwasliterallyoutofmymind。Igaveawayallthemoneyyousentme……tohiswifeforthefuneral。She"sawidownow,inconsumption,apoorcreature……threelittlechildren,starving……nothinginthehouse……there"sadaughter,too……perhapsyou"dhavegivenityourselfifyou"dseenthem。ButIhadnorighttodoitIadmit,especiallyasIknewhowyouneededthemoneyyourself。
Tohelpothersonemusthavetherighttodoit,orelseCrevez,chiens,sivousn"etespascontents。“Helaughed,“That"sright,isn"tit,Dounia？”
“No,it"snot,“answeredDouniafirmly。
“Bah!you,too,haveideals,“hemuttered,lookingatheralmostwithhatred,andsmilingsarcastically。“Ioughttohaveconsideredthat……Well,that"spraiseworthy,andit"sbetterforyou……andifyoureachalineyouwon"toverstep,youwillbeunhappy……andifyouoverstepit,maybeyouwillbestillunhappier……Butallthat"snonsense,“headdedirritably,vexedatbeingcarriedaway。
“IonlymeanttosaythatIbegyourforgiveness,mother,“heconcluded,shortlyandabruptly。
“That"senough,Rodya,Iamsurethateverythingyoudoisverygood,“saidhismother,delighted。
“Don"tbetoosure,“heanswered,twistinghismouthintoasmile。
Asilencefollowed。Therewasacertainconstraintinallthisconversation,andinthesilence,andinthereconciliation,andintheforgiveness,andallwerefeelingit。
“Itisasthoughtheywereafraidofme,“Raskolnikovwasthinkingtohimself,lookingaskanceathismotherandsister。PulcheriaAlexandrovnawasindeedgrowingmoretimidthelongershekeptsilent。
“YetintheirabsenceIseemedtolovethemsomuch,“flashedthroughhismind。
“Doyouknow,Rodya,MarfaPetrovnaisdead,“PulcheriaAlexandrovnasuddenlyblurtedout。
“WhatMarfaPetrovna？”
“Oh,mercyonus-MarfaPetrovnaSvidrigailov。Iwroteyousomuchabouther。“
“A-a-h!Yes,Iremember……Soshe"sdead!Oh,really？”herousedhimselfsuddenly,asifwakingup。“Whatdidshedieof？”
“Onlyimagine,quitesuddenly,“PulcheriaAlexandrovnaansweredhurriedly,encouragedbyhiscuriosity。“OntheverydayIwassendingyouthatletter!Wouldyoubelieveit,thatawfulmanseemstohavebeenthecauseofherdeath。Theysayhebeatherdreadfully。“
“Why,weretheyonsuchbadterms？”heasked,addressinghissister。
“Notatall。Quitethecontraryindeed。Withher,hewasalwaysverypatient,considerateeven。Infact,allthosesevenyearsoftheirmarriedlifehegavewaytoher,toomuchsoindeed,inmanycases。
Allofasuddenheseemstohavelostpatience。“
“Thenhecouldnothavebeensoawfulifhecontrolledhimselfforsevenyears?Youseemtobedefendinghim,Dounia？”
“No,no,he"sanawfulman!Icanimaginenothingmoreawful！”
Douniaanswered,almostwithashudder,knittingherbrows,andsinkingintothought。
“Thathadhappenedinthemorning,“PulcheriaAlexandrovnawentonhurriedly。“Anddirectlyafterwardssheorderedthehorsestobeharnessedtodrivetothetownimmediatelyafterdinner。Shealwaysusedtodrivetothetowninsuchcases。Sheateaverygooddinner,I
amtold……“
“Afterthebeating？”
“Thatwasalwaysher……habit;andimmediatelyafterdinner,soasnottobelateinstarting,shewenttothebathhouse……Yousee,shewasundergoingsometreatmentwithbaths。Theyhaveacoldspringthere,andsheusedtobatheinitregularlyeveryday,andnosoonerhadshegotintothewaterwhenshesuddenlyhadastroke！”
“Ishouldthinkso,“saidZossimov。
“Anddidhebeatherbadly？”
“Whatdoesthatmatter！”putinDounia。
“H"m!ButIdon"tknowwhyyouwanttotellussuchgossip,mother,“
saidRaskolnikovirritably,asitwereinspiteofhimself。
“Ah,mydear,Idon"tknowwhattotalkabout,“brokefromPulcheriaAlexandrovna。
“Why,areyouallafraidofme？”heasked,withaconstrainedsmile。
“That"scertainlytrue,“saidDounia,lookingdirectlyandsternlyatherbrother。“Motherwascrossingherselfwithterrorasshecameupthestairs。“
Hisfaceworked,asthoughinconvulsion。
“Ach,whatareyousaying,Dounia!Don"tbeangry,please,Rodya……
Whydidyousaythat,Dounia？”PulcheriaAlexandrovnabegan,overwhelmed-“Yousee,cominghere,Iwasdreamingalltheway,inthetrain,howweshouldmeet,howweshouldtalkovereverythingtogether……AndIwassohappy,Ididnotnoticethejourney!ButwhatamIsaying?Iamhappynow……Youshouldnot,Dounia……Iamhappynow-simplyinseeingyou,Rodya……“
“Hush,mother,“hemutteredinconfusion,notlookingather,butpressingherhand。“Weshallhavetimetospeakfreelyofeverything！”
Ashesaidthis,hewassuddenlyoverwhelmedwithconfusionandturnedpale。Againthatawfulsensationhehadknownoflatepassedwithdeadlychilloverhissoul。Againitbecamesuddenlyplainandperceptibletohimthathehadjusttoldafearfullie-thathewouldnevernowbeabletospeakfreelyofeverything-thathewouldneveragainbeabletospeakofanythingtoanyone。Theanguishofthisthoughtwassuchthatforamomenthealmostforgothimself。Hegotupfromhisseat,andnotlookingatanyonewalkedtowardsthedoor。
“Whatareyouabout？”criedRazumihin,clutchinghimbythearm。
Hesatdownagain,andbeganlookingabouthim,insilence。Theywerealllookingathiminperplexity。
“Butwhatareyouallsodullfor？”heshouted,suddenlyandquiteunexpectedly。“Dosaysomething!What"stheuseofsittinglikethis?Come,dospeak。Letustalk……Wemeettogetherandsitinsilence……Come,anything！”
“ThankGod;Iwasafraidthesamethingasyesterdaywasbeginningagain,“saidPulcheriaAlexandrovna,crossingherself。
“Whatisthematter,Rodya？”askedAvdotyaRomanovna,distrustfully。
“Oh,nothing!Irememberedsomething,“heanswered,andsuddenlylaughed。
“Well,ifyourememberedsomething;that"sallright!……Iwasbeginningtothink……“mutteredZossimov,gettingupfromthesofa。
“Itistimeformetobeoff。Iwilllookinagainperhaps……ifI
can……“Hemadehisbows,andwentout。
“Whatanexcellentman！”observedPulcheriaAlexandrovna。
“Yes,excellent,splendid,well-educated,intelligent,“
Raskolnikovbegan,suddenlyspeakingwithsurprisingrapidity,andalivelinesshehadnotshowntillthen。“Ican"trememberwhereImethimbeforemyillness……IbelieveIhavemethimsomewhere……Andthisisagoodman,too,“henoddedatRazumihin。“Doyoulikehim,Dounia？”heaskedher;andsuddenly,forsomeunknownreason,laughed。
“Verymuch,“answeredDounia。
“Foo-whatapigyouare,“Razumihinprotested,blushinginterribleconfusion,andhegotupfromhischair。PulcheriaAlexandrovnasmiledfaintly,butRaskolnikovlaughedaloud。
“Whereareyouoffto？”
“Imustgo。“
“Youneednotatall。Stay。Zossimovhasgone,soyoumust。Don"tgo。What"sthetime?Isittwelveo"clock?Whataprettywatchyouhavegot,Dounia。Butwhyareyouallsilentagain?Idoallthetalking。“
“ItwasapresentfromMarfaPetrovna,“answeredDounia。
“Andaveryexpensiveone！”addedPulcheriaAlexandrovna。
“A-ah!Whatabigone!Hardlylikealady"s。“
“Ilikethatsort,“saidDounia。
“Soitisnotapresentfromherfiance,“thoughtRazumihin,andwasunreasonablydelighted。
“IthoughtitwasLuzhin"spresent,“observedRaskolnikov。
“No,hehasnotmadeDouniaanypresentsyet。“
“A-ah!Anddoyouremember,mother,Iwasinloveandwantedtogetmarried？”hesaidsuddenly,lookingathismother,whowasdisconcertedbythesuddenchangeofsubjectandthewayhespokeofit。
“Oh,yes,mydear。“
PulcheriaAlexandrovnaexchangedglanceswithDouniaandRazumihin。
“H"m,yes。WhatshallItellyou?Idon"tremembermuchindeed。
Shewassuchasicklygirl,“hewenton,growingdreamyandlookingdownagain。“Quiteaninvalid。Shewasfondofgivingalmstothepoor,andwasalwaysdreamingofanunnery,andoncesheburstintotearswhenshebegantalkingtomeaboutit。Yes,yes,Iremember。I
rememberverywell。Shewasanuglylittlething。Ireallydon"tknowwhatdrewmetoherthen-Ithinkitwasbecauseshewasalwaysill。Ifshehadbeenlameorhunchback,IbelieveIshouldhavelikedherbetterstill,“hesmileddreamily。“Yes,itwasasortofspringdelirium。“
“No,itwasnotonlyspringdelirium,“saidDounia,withwarmfeeling。
Hefixedastrainedintentlookonhissister,butdidnothearordidnotunderstandherwords。Then,completelylostinthought,hegotup,wentuptohismother,kissedher,wentbacktohisplaceandsatdown。
“Youloveherevennow？”saidPulcheriaAlexandrovna,touched。
“Her?Now?Oh,yes……Youaskabouther?No……that"sallnowasitwere,inanotherworld……andsolongago。Andindeedeverythinghappeninghereseemssomehowfaraway。“Helookedattentivelyatthem。
“Younow……Iseemtobelookingatyoufromathousandmilesaway……but,goodnessknowswhywearetalkingofthat!Andwhat"stheuseofaskingaboutit,“headdedwithannoyance,andbitinghisnails,hefellintodreamysilenceagain。
“Whatawretchedlodgingyouhave,Rodya!It"slikeatomb,“saidPulcheriaAlexandrovna,suddenlybreakingtheoppressivesilence。“I
amsureit"squitehalfthroughyourlodgingyouhavebecomesomelancholy。“
“Mylodging,“heanswered,listlessly。“Yes,thelodginghadagreatdealtodowithit……Ithoughtthat,too……Ifonlyyouknew,though,whatastrangethingyousaidjustnow,mother,“hesaid,laughingstrangely。
Alittlemore,andtheircompanionship,thismotherandthissister,withhimafterthreeyears"absence,thisintimatetoneofconversation,infaceoftheutterimpossibilityofreallyspeakingaboutanything,wouldhavebeenbeyondhispowerofendurance。Buttherewasoneurgentmatterwhichmustbesettledonewayortheotherthatday-sohehaddecidedwhenhewoke。Nowhewasgladtorememberit,asameansofescape。
“Listen,Dounia,“hebegan,gravelyanddrily,“ofcourseIbegyourpardonforyesterday,butIconsideritmydutytotellyouagainthatIdonotwithdrawfrommychiefpoint。ItismeorLuzhin。IfIamascoundrel,youmustnotbe。Oneisenough。IfyoumarryLuzhin,I
ceaseatoncetolookonyouasasister。“
“Rodya,Rodya!Itisthesameasyesterdayagain,“PulcheriaAlexandrovnacried,mournfully。“Andwhydoyoucallyourselfascoundrel?Ican"tbearit。Yousaidthesameyesterday。“
“Brother,“Douniaansweredfirmlyandwiththesamedryness。“Inallthisthereisamistakeonyourpart。Ithoughtitoveratnight,andfoundoutthemistake。ItisallbecauseyouseemtofancyIamsacrificingmyselftosomeoneandforsomeone。Thatisnotthecaseatall。Iamsimplymarryingformyownsake,becausethingsarehardforme。Though,ofcourse,IshallbegladifIsucceedinbeingusefultomyfamily。Butthatisnotthechiefmotiveformydecision……“
“Sheislying,“hethoughttohimself,bitinghisnailsvindictively。“Proudcreature!Shewon"tadmitshewantstodoitoutofcharity!Toohaughty!Oh,basecharacters!Theyevenloveasthoughtheyhate……Oh,howI……hatethemall！”
“Infact,“continuedDounia,“IammarryingPyotrPetrovitchbecauseoftwoevilsIchoosetheless。Iintendtodohonestlyallheexpectsofme,soIamnotdeceivinghim……Whydidyousmilejustnow？”She,too,flushed,andtherewasagleamofangerinhereyes。
“All？”heasked,withamalignantgrin。
“Withincertainlimits。BoththemannerandformofPyotrPetrovitch"scourtshipshowedmeatoncewhathewanted。Hemay,ofcourse,thinktoowellofhimself,butIhopeheesteemsme,too……
Whyareyoulaughingagain？”
“Andwhyareyoublushingagain?Youarelying,sister。Youareintentionallylying,simplyfromfeminineobstinacy,simplytoholdyourownagainstme……YoucannotrespectLuzhin。Ihaveseenhimandtalkedwithhim。Soyouaresellingyourselfformoney,andsoinanycaseyouareactingbasely,andIamgladatleastthatyoucanblushforit。“
“Itisnottrue。Iamnotlying,“criedDounia,losinghercomposure。“IwouldnotmarryhimifIwerenotconvincedthatheesteemsmeandthinkshighlyofme。IwouldnotmarryhimifIwerenotfirmlyconvincedthatIcanrespecthim。Fortunately,Icanhaveconvincingproofofitthisveryday……andsuchamarriageisnotavileness,asyousay!Andevenifyouwereright,ifIreallyhaddeterminedonavileaction,isitnotmercilessonyourparttospeaktomelikethat?Whydoyoudemandofmeaheroismthatperhapsyouhavenoteither?Itisdespotism;itistyranny。IfIruinanyone,itisonlymyself……Iamnotcommittingamurder。Whydoyoulookatmelikethat?Whyareyousopale?Rodya,darling,what"sthematter？”
“Goodheavens!Youhavemadehimfaint,“criedPulcheriaAlexandrovna。
“No,no,nonsense!It"snothing。Alittlegiddiness-notfainting。
Youhavefaintingonthebrain。H"m,yes,whatwasIsaying?Oh,yes。Inwhatwaywillyougetconvincingproofto-daythatyoucanrespecthim,andthathe……esteemsyou,asyousaid。Ithinkyousaidto-day？”
“Mother,showRodyaPyotrPetrovitch"sletter,“saidDounia。
Withtremblinghands,PulcheriaAlexandrovnagavehimtheletter。Hetookitwithgreatinterest,but,beforeopeningit,hesuddenlylookedwithasortofwonderatDounia。
“Itisstrange,“hesaid,slowly,asthoughstruckbyanewidea。
“WhatamImakingsuchafussfor?Whatisitallabout?Marrywhomyoulike！”
Hesaidthisasthoughtohimself,butsaiditaloud,andlookedforsometimeathissister,asthoughpuzzled。Heopenedtheletteratlast,stillwiththesamelookofstrangewonderonhisface。Then,slowlyandattentively,hebeganreading,andreaditthroughtwice。
PulcheriaAlexandrovnashowedmarkedanxiety,andallindeedexpectedsomethingparticular。
“Whatsurprisesme,“hebegan,afterashortpause,handingthelettertohismother,butnotaddressinganyoneinparticular,“isthatheisabusinessman,alawyer,andhisconversationispretentiousindeed,andyethewritessuchanuneducatedletter。“
Theyallstarted。Theyhadexpectedsomethingquitedifferent。
“Buttheyallwritelikethat,youknow,“Razumihinobserved,abruptly。
“Haveyoureadit？”
“Yes。“
“Weshowedhim,Rodya。We……consultedhimjustnow,“PulcheriaAlexandrovnabegan,embarrassed。
“That"sjustthejargonofthecourts,“Razumihinputin。“Legaldocumentsarewrittenlikethattothisday。“
“Legal?Yes,it"sjustlegal-businesslanguage-notsoveryuneducated,andnotquiteeducated-businesslanguage！”
“PyotrPetrovitchmakesnosecretofthefactthathehadacheapeducation,heisproudindeedofhavingmadehisownway,“AvdotyaRomanovnaobserved,somewhatoffendedbyherbrother"stone。
“Well,ifhe"sproudofit,hehasreason,Idon"tdenyit。Youseemtobeoffended,sister,atmymakingonlysuchafrivolouscriticismontheletter,andtothinkthatIspeakofsuchtriflingmattersonpurposetoannoyyou。Itisquitethecontrary,anobservationaproposofthestyleoccurredtomethatisbynomeansirrelevantasthingsstand。Thereisoneexpression,"blameyourselves"putinverysignificantlyandplainly,andthereisbesidesathreatthathewillgoawayatonceifIampresent。Thatthreattogoawayisequivalenttoathreattoabandonyoubothifyouaredisobedient,andtoabandonyounowaftersummoningyoutoPetersburg。Well,whatdoyouthink?CanoneresentsuchanexpressionfromLuzhin,asweshouldifhe(hepointedtoRazumihin)hadwrittenit,orZossimov,oroneofus？”
“N-no,“answeredDounia,withmoreanimation。“Isawclearlythatitwastoonaivelyexpressed,andthatperhapshesimplyhasnoskillinwriting……thatisatruecriticism,brother。Ididnotexpect,indeed……“
“Itisexpressedinlegalstyle,andsoundscoarserthanperhapsheintended。ButImustdisillusionyoualittle。Thereisoneexpressionintheletter,oneslanderaboutme,andratheracontemptibleone。Igavethemoneylastnighttothewidow,awomaninconsumption,crushedwithtrouble,andnot"onthepretextofthefuneral,"butsimplytopayforthefuneral,andnottothedaughter-ayoungwoman,ashewrites,ofnotoriousbehaviour(whomIsawlastnightforthefirsttimeinmylife)-buttothewidow。
InallthisIseeatoohastydesiretoslandermeandtoraisedissensionbetweenus。Itisexpressedagaininlegaljargon,thatistosay,withatooobviousdisplayoftheaim,andwithaverynaiveeagerness。Heisamanofintelligence,buttoactsensibly,intelligenceisnotenough。Itallshowsthemanand……Idon"tthinkhehasagreatesteemforyou。Itellyouthissimplytowarnyou,becauseIsincerelywishforyourgood……“
Douniadidnotreply。Herresolutionhadbeentaken。Shewasonlyawaitingtheevening。
“Thenwhatisyourdecision,Rodya？”askedPulcheriaAlexandrovna,whowasmoreuneasythaneveratthesudden,newbusinessliketoneofhistalk。
“Whatdecision？”
“YouseePyotrPetrovitchwritesthatyouarenottobewithusthisevening,andthathewillgoawayifyoucome。Sowillyou……come？”
“That,ofcourse,isnotformetodecide,butforyoufirst,ifyouarenotoffendedbysucharequest;andsecondly,byDounia,ifshe,too,isnotoffended。Iwilldowhatyouthinkbest,“headdeddrily。
“Douniahasalreadydecided,andIfullyagreewithher,“
PulcheriaAlexandrovnahastenedtodeclare。
“Idecidedtoaskyou,Rodya,tourgeyounottofailtobewithusatthisinterview,“saidDounia。“Willyoucome？”
“Yes。“
“Iwillaskyou,too,tobewithusateighto"clock,“shesaid,addressingRazumihin。“Mother,Iaminvitinghim,too。“
“Quiteright,Dounia。Well,sinceyouhavedecided,“addedPulcheriaAlexandrovna,“sobeit。Ishallfeeleasiermyself。Idonotlikeconcealmentanddeception。Betterletushavethewholetruth……
PyotrPetrovitchmaybeangryornot,now！”
ChapterFourATTHATmomentthedoorwassoftlyopened,andayounggirlwalkedintotheroom,lookingtimidlyabouther。Everyoneturnedtowardsherwithsurpriseandcuriosity。Atfirstsight,Raskolnikovdidnotrecogniseher。ItwasSofyaSemyonovnaMarmeladov。Hehadseenheryesterdayforthefirsttime,butatsuchamoment,insuchsurroundingsandinsuchadress,thathismemoryretainedaverydifferentimageofher。Nowshewasamodestlyandpoorly-dressedyounggirl,veryyoung,indeedalmostlikeachild,withamodestandrefinedmanner,withacandidbutsomewhatfrightened-lookingface。Shewaswearingaveryplainindoordress,andhadonashabbyold-fashionedhat,butshestillcarriedaparasol。Unexpectedlyfindingtheroomfullofpeople,shewasnotsomuchembarrassedascompletelyoverwhelmedwithshyness,likealittlechild。Shewasevenabouttoretreat。“Oh……it"syou！”saidRaskolnikov,extremelyastonished,andhe,too,wasconfused。HeatoncerecollectedthathismotherandsisterknewthroughLuzhin"sletterof“someyoungwomanofnotoriousbehaviour。“HehadonlyjustbeenprotestingagainstLuzhin"scalumnyanddeclaringthathehadseenthegirllastnightforthefirsttime,andsuddenlyshehadwalkedin。Heremembered,too,thathehadnotprotestedagainsttheexpression“ofnotoriousbehaviour。“Allthispassedvaguelyandfleetinglythroughhisbrain,butlookingathermoreintently,hesawthatthehumiliatedcreaturewassohumiliatedthathefeltsuddenlysorryforher。Whenshemadeamovementtoretreatinterror,itsentapangtohisheart。
“Ididnotexpectyou,“hesaid,hurriedly,withalookthatmadeherstop。“Pleasesitdown。Youcome,nodoubt,fromKaterinaIvanovna。Allowme-notthere。Sithere……“
AtSonia"sentrance,Razumihin,whohadbeensittingononeofRaskolnikov"sthreechairs,closetothedoor,gotuptoallowhertoenter。RaskolnikovhadatfirstshownhertheplaceonthesofawhereZossimovhadbeensitting,butfeelingthatthesofawhichservedhimasabed,wastoofamiliaraplace,hehurriedlymotionedhertoRazumihin"schair。
“Yousithere,“hesaidtoRazumihin,puttinghimonthesofa。
Soniasatdown,almostshakingwithterror,andlookedtimidlyatthetwoladies。Itwasevidentlyalmostinconceivabletoherselfthatshecouldsitdownbesidethem。Atthethoughtofit,shewassofrightenedthatshehurriedlygotupagain,andinutterconfusionaddressedRaskolnikov。
“I……I……havecomeforoneminute。Forgivemefordisturbingyou,“
shebeganfalteringly。“IcomefromKaterinaIvanovna,andshehadnoonetosend。KaterinaIvanovnatoldmetobegyou……tobeattheservice……inthemorning……atMitrofanievsky……andthen……tous……
toher……todoherthehonour……shetoldmetobegyou……“Soniastammeredandceasedspeaking。
“Iwilltry,certainly,mostcertainly,“answeredRaskolnikov。He,too,stoodup,andhe,too,falteredandcouldnotfinishhissentence。“Pleasesitdown,“hesaid,suddenly。“Iwanttotalktoyou。Youareperhapsinahurry,butplease,besokind,sparemetwominutes,“andhedrewupachairforher。
Soniasatdownagain,andagaintimidlyshetookahurried,frightenedlookatthetwoladies,anddroppedhereyes。Raskolnikov"spalefaceflushed,ashudderpassedoverhim,hiseyesglowed。
“Mother,“hesaid,firmlyandinsistently,“thisisSofyaSemyonovnaMarmeladov,thedaughterofthatunfortunateMr。Marmeladov,whowasrunoveryesterdaybeforemyeyes,andofwhomIwasjusttellingyou。“
PulcheriaAlexandrovnaglancedatSonia,andslightlyscreweduphereyes。InspiteofherembarrassmentbeforeRodya"surgentandchallenginglook,shecouldnotdenyherselfthatsatisfaction。Douniagazedgravelyandintentlyintothepoorgirl"sface,andscrutinisedherwithperplexity。Sonia,hearingherselfintroduced,triedtoraisehereyesagain,butwasmoreembarrassedthanever。
“Iwantedtoaskyou,“saidRaskolnikov,hastily,“howthingswerearrangedyesterday。Youwerenotworriedbythepolice,forinstance？”
“No,thatwasallright……itwastooevident,thecauseofdeath……
theydidnotworryus……onlythelodgersareangry。“
“Why？”
“Atthebody"sremainingsolong。Youseeitishotnow。Sothat,to-day,theywillcarryittothecemetery,intothechapel,untilto-morrow。AtfirstKaterinaIvanovnawasunwilling,butnowsheseesherselfthatit"snecessary……“
“To-day,then？”
“Shebegsyoutodousthehonourtobeinthechurchto-morrowfortheservice,andthentobepresentatthefunerallunch。“
“Sheisgivingafunerallunch？”
“Yes……justalittle……Shetoldmetothankyouverymuchforhelpingusyesterday。Butforyou,weshouldhavehadnothingforthefuneral。“
Allatonceherlipsandchinbegantrembling,but,withaneffort,shecontrolledherself,lookingdownagain。
Duringtheconversation,Raskolnikovwatchedhercarefully。Shehadathin,verythin,palelittleface,ratherirregularandangular,withasharplittlenoseandchin。Shecouldnothavebeencalledpretty,butherblueeyesweresoclear,andwhentheylightedup,therewassuchakindlinessandsimplicityinherexpressionthatonecouldnothelpbeingattracted。Herface,andherwholefigureindeed,hadanotherpeculiarcharacteristic。Inspiteofhereighteenyears,shelookedalmostalittlegirl-almostachild。Andinsomeofhergestures,thischildishnessseemedalmostabsurd。
“ButhasKaterinaIvanovnabeenabletomanagewithsuchsmallmeans?Doessheevenmeantohaveafunerallunch？”Raskolnikovasked,persistentlykeepinguptheconversation。
“Thecoffinwillbeplain,ofcourse……andeverythingwillbeplain,soitwon"tcostmuch。KaterinaIvanovnaandIhavereckoneditallout,sothattherewillbeenoughleft……andKaterinaIvanovnawasveryanxiousitshouldbeso。Youknowonecan"t……it"sacomforttoher……sheislikethat,youknow……“
“Iunderstand,Iunderstand……ofcourse……whydoyoulookatmyroomlikethat?Mymotherhasjustsaiditislikeatomb。“
“Yougaveuseverythingyesterday,“Soniasaidsuddenly,inreply,inaloudrapidwhisper;andagainshelookeddowninconfusion。Herlipsandchinweretremblingoncemore。ShehadbeenstruckatoncebyRaskolnikov"spoorsurroundings,andnowthesewordsbrokeoutspontaneously。Asilencefollowed。TherewasalightinDounia"seyes,andevenPulcheriaAlexandrovnalookedkindlyatSonia。
“Rodya,“shesaid,gettingup,“weshallhavedinnertogether,ofcourse。Come,Dounia……Andyou,Rodya,hadbettergoforalittlewalk,andthenrestandliedownbeforeyoucometoseeus……Iamafraidwehaveexhaustedyou……“
“Yes,yes,I"llcome,“heanswered,gettingupfussily。“ButI
havesomethingtoseeto。“
“Butsurelyyouwillhavedinnertogether？”criedRazumihin,lookinginsurpriseatRaskolnikov。“Whatdoyoumean？”
“Yes,yes,Iamcoming……ofcourse,ofcourse!Andyoustayaminute。Youdonotwanthimjustnow,doyou,mother?OrperhapsI
amtakinghimfromyou？”
“Oh,no,no。Andwillyou,DmitriProkofitch,dousthefavourofdiningwithus？”
“Pleasedo,“addedDounia。
Razumihinbowed,positivelyradiant。Foronemoment,theywereallstrangelyembarrassed。
“Good-bye,Rodya,thatistillwemeet。Idonotlikesayinggood-bye。Good-bye,Nastasya。Ah,Ihavesaidgood-byeagain。“
PulcheriaAlexandrovnameanttogreetSonia,too;butitsomehowfailedtocomeoff,andshewentinaflutteroutoftheroom。
ButAvdotyaRomanovnaseemedtoawaitherturn,andfollowinghermotherout,gaveSoniaanattentive,courteousbow。Sonia,inconfusion,gaveahurried,frightenedcurtsy。Therewasalookofpoignantdiscomfortinherface,asthoughAvdotyaRomanovna"scourtesyandattentionwereoppressiveandpainfultoher。
“Dounia,good-bye,“calledRaskolnikov,inthepassage。“Givemeyourhand。“
“Why,Ididgiveittoyou。Haveyouforgotten？”saidDounia,turningwarmlyandawkwardlytohim。
“Nevermind,giveittomeagain。“Andhesqueezedherfingerswarmly。
Douniasmiled,flushed,pulledherhandaway,andwentoffquitehappy。
“Come,that"scapital,“hesaidtoSonia,goingbackandlookingbrightlyather。“Godgivepeacetothedead,thelivinghavestilltolive。Thatisright,isn"tit？”
Sonialookedsurprisedatthesuddenbrightnessofhisface。Helookedatherforsomemomentsinsilence。Thewholehistoryofthedeadfatherfloatedbeforehismemoryinthosemoments-
“Heavens,Dounia,“PulcheriaAlexandrovnabegan,assoonastheywereinthestreet,“Ireallyfeelrelievedmyselfatcomingaway-
moreatease。HowlittledidIthinkyesterdayinthetrainthatI
couldeverbegladofthat。“
“Itellyouagain,mother,heisstillveryill。Don"tyouseeit?
Perhapsworryingaboutusupsethim。Wemustbepatient,andmuch,muchcanbeforgiven。“
“Well,youwerenotverypatient！”PulcheriaAlexandrovnacaughtherup,hotlyandjealously。“Doyouknow,Dounia,Iwaslookingatyoutwo。Youaretheveryportraitofhim,andnotsomuchinfaceasinsoul。Youarebothmelancholy,bothmoroseandhottempered,bothhaughtyandbothgenerous……Surelyhecan"tbeanegoist,Dounia。
Eh?WhenIthinkofwhatisinstoreforusthisevening,myheartsinks！”
“Don"tbeuneasy,mother。Whatmustbe,willbe。“
“Dounia,onlythinkwhatapositionwearein!WhatifPyotrPetrovitchbreaksitoff？”poorPulcheriaAlexandrovnablurtedout,incautiously。
“Hewon"tbeworthmuchifhedoes,“answeredDounia,sharplyandcontemptuously。
“Wedidwelltocomeaway,“PulcheriaAlexandrovnahurriedlybrokein。“Hewasinahurryaboutsomebusinessorother。Ifhegetsoutandhasabreathofair……itisfearfullycloseinhisroom……Butwhereisonetogetabreathofairhere。Theverystreetsherefeellikeshut-uprooms。Goodheavens!whatatown!……stay……thisside……
theywillcrushyou-carryingsomething。Why,itisapianotheyhavegot,Ideclare……howtheypush……Iamverymuchafraidofthatyoungwoman,too。“
“Whatyoungwoman,mother?
“Why,thatSofyaSemyonovna,whowastherejustnow。“
“Why？”
“Ihaveapresentiment,Dounia。Well,youmaybelieveitornot,butassoonasshecamein,thatveryminute,Ifeltthatshewasthechiefcauseofthetrouble……“
“Nothingofthesort！”criedDounia,invexation。“Whatnonsense,withyourpresentiments,mother!Heonlymadeheracquaintancetheeveningbefore,andhedidnotknowherwhenshecamein。“
“Well,youwillsee……Sheworriesme;butyouwillsee,youwillsee!Iwassofrightened。Shewasgazingatmewiththoseeyes。I
couldscarcelysitstillinmychairwhenhebeganintroducingher,doyouremember?Itseemssostrange,butPyotrPetrovitchwriteslikethatabouther,andheintroduceshertous-toyou!Sohemustthinkagreatdealofher。“
“Peoplewillwriteanything。Weweretalkedaboutandwrittenabout,too。Haveyouforgotten?Iamsurethatsheisagoodgirl,andthatitisallnonsense。“
“Godgrantitmaybe！”
“AndPyotrPetrovitchisacontemptibleslanderer,“Douniasnappedout,suddenly。
PulcheriaAlexandrovnawascrushed;theconversationwasnotresumed-
“IwilltellyouwhatIwantwithyou,“saidRaskolnikov,drawingRazumihintothewindow。
“ThenIwilltellKaterinaIvanovnathatyouarecoming,“Soniasaidhurriedly,preparingtodepart。
“Oneminute,SofyaSemyonovna。Wehavenosecrets。Youarenotinourway。Iwanttohaveanotherwordortwowithyou。Listen！”heturnedsuddenlytoRazumihinagain。“Youknowthat……what"shisname……PorfiryPetrovitch？”
“Ishouldthinkso!Heisarelation。Why？”addedthelatter,withinterest。
“Isnothemanagingthatcase……youknowaboutthatmurder?……
Youwerespeakingaboutityesterday。“
“Yes……well？”Razumihin"seyesopenedwide。
“Hewasinquiringforpeoplewhohadpawnedthings,andIhavesomepledgesthere,too-trifles-aringmysistergavemeasakeepsakewhenIlefthome,andmyfather"ssilverwatch-theyareonlyworthfiveorsixroublesaltogether……butIvaluethem。SowhatamI
todonow?Idonotwanttolosethethings,especiallythewatch。I
wasquakingjustnow,forfearmotherwouldasktolookatit,whenwespokeofDounia"swatch。Itistheonlythingoffather"sleftus。Shewouldbeillifitwerelost。Youknowwhatwomenare。Sotellmewhattodo。IknowIoughttohavegivennoticeatthepolicestation,butwoulditnotbebettertogostraighttoPorfiry?Eh?Whatdoyouthink?Themattermightbesettledmorequickly。Youseemothermayaskforitbeforedinner。“
“Certainlynottothepolicestation。CertainlytoPorfiry,“
Razumihinshoutedinextraordinaryexcitement。“Well,howgladIam。
Letusgoatonce。Itisacoupleofsteps。Weshallbesuretofindhim。“
“Verywell,letusgo。“
“Andhewillbevery,verygladtomakeyouracquaintance。Ihaveoftentalkedtohimofyouatdifferenttimes。Iwasspeakingofyouyesterday。Letusgo。Soyouknewtheoldwoman?Sothat"sit!Itisallturningoutsplendidly……Oh,yes,SofyaIvanovna……“
“SofyaSemyonovna,“correctedRaskolnikov。“SofyaSemyonovna,thisismyfriendRazumihin,andheisagoodman。“
“Ifyouhavetogonow,“Soniawasbeginning,notlookingatRazumihinatall,andstillmoreembarrassed。
“Letusgo,“decidedRaskolnikov。“Iwillcometoyouto-day,SofyaSemyonovna。Onlytellmewhereyoulive。“
Hewasnotexactlyillatease,butseemedhurried,andavoidedhereyes。Soniagaveheraddress,andflushedasshedidso。Theyallwentouttogether。
“Don"tyoulockup？”askedRazumihin,followinghimontothestairs。
“Never,“answeredRaskolnikov。“Ihavebeenmeaningtobuyalockforthesetwoyears。Peoplearehappywhohavenoneedoflocks,“hesaid,laughing,toSonia。Theystoodstillinthegateway。
“Doyougototheright,SofyaSemyonovna?Howdidyoufindme,bytheway？”headded,asthoughhewantedtosaysomethingquitedifferent。Hewantedtolookathersoftcleareyes,butthiswasnoteasy。
“Why,yougaveyouraddresstoPolenkayesterday。“
“Polenka?Oh,yes;Polenka,thatisthelittlegirl。Sheisyoursister?DidIgivehertheaddress？”
“Why,hadyouforgotten？”
“No,Iremember。“
“Ihadheardmyfatherspeakofyou……onlyIdidnotknowyourname,andhedidnotknowit。AndnowIcame……andasIhadlearntyourname,Iaskedto-day,"WheredoesMr。Raskolnikovlive?"Ididnotknowyouhadonlyaroomtoo……Good-bye,IwilltellKaterinaIvanovna。“
Shewasextremelygladtoescapeatlast;shewentawaylookingdown,hurryingtogetoutofsightassoonaspossible,towalkthetwentystepstotheturningontherightandtobeatlastalone,andthenmovingrapidlyalong,lookingatnoone,noticingnothing,tothink,toremember,tomeditateoneveryword,everydetail。Never,neverhadshefeltanythinglikethis。Dimlyandunconsciouslyawholenewworldwasopeningbeforeher。SherememberedsuddenlythatRaskolnikovmeanttocometoherthatday,perhapsatonce!
“Onlynotto-day,please,notto-day！”shekeptmutteringwithasinkingheart,asthoughentreatingsomeone,likeafrightenedchild。
“Mercy!tome……tothatroom……hewillsee……oh,dear！”
Shewasnotcapableatthatinstantofnoticinganunknowngentlemanwhowaswatchingherandfollowingatherheels。Hehadaccompaniedherfromthegateway。AtthemomentwhenRazumihin,Raskolnikov,andshestoodstillatpartingonthepavement,thisgentleman,whowasjustpassing,startedonhearingSonia"swords：“andIaskedwhereMr。
Raskolnikovlived？”Heturnedarapidbutattentivelookuponallthree,especiallyuponRaskolnikov,towhomSoniawasspeaking;thenlookedbackandnotedthehouse。Allthiswasdoneinaninstantashepassed,andtryingnottobetrayhisinterest,hewalkedonmoreslowlyasthoughwaitingforsomething。HewaswaitingforSonia;hesawthattheywereparting,andthatSoniawasgoinghome。
“Home?Where?I"veseenthatfacesomewhere,“hethought。“Imustfindout。“
Attheturninghecrossedover,lookedround,andsawSoniacomingthesameway,noticingnothing。Sheturnedthecorner。Hefollowedherontheotherside。Afteraboutfiftypaceshecrossedoveragain,overtookherandkepttwoorthreeyardsbehindher。
Hewasamanaboutfifty,rathertallandthicklyset,withbroadhighshoulderswhichmadehimlookasthoughhestoopedalittle。Heworegoodandfashionableclothes,andlookedlikeagentlemanofposition。Hecarriedahandsomecane,whichhetappedonthepavementateachstep;hisgloveswerespotless。Hehadabroad,ratherpleasantfacewithhighcheek-bonesandafreshcolour,notoftenseeninPetersburg。Hisflaxenhairwasstillabundant,andonlytouchedhereandtherewithgrey,andhisthicksquarebeardwasevenlighterthanhishair。Hiseyeswereblueandhadacoldandthoughtfullook;hislipswerecrimson。Hewasaremarkedlywell-preservedmanandlookedmuchyoungerthanhisyears。
WhenSoniacameoutonthecanalbank,theyweretheonlytwopersonsonthepavement。Heobservedherdreaminessandpreoccupation。
Onreachingthehousewhereshelodged,Soniaturnedinatthegate;
hefollowedher,seemingrathersurprised。Inthecourtyardsheturnedtotherightcorner。“Bah！”mutteredtheunknowngentleman,andmountedthestairsbehindher。OnlythenSonianoticedhim。Shereachedthethirdstorey,turneddownthepassage,andrangatNo。
9。Onthedoorwasinscribedinchalk,“Kapernaumov,Tailor。““Bah！”
thestrangerrepeatedagain,wonderingatthestrangecoincidence,andherangnextdoor,atNo。8。Thedoorsweretwoorthreeyardsapart。
“YoulodgeatKapernaumov"s,“hesaid,lookingatSoniaandlaughing。“Healteredawaistcoatformeyesterday。IamstayingclosehereatMadameResslich"s。Howodd！”Sonialookedathimattentively。
“Weareneighbours,“hewentongaily。“Ionlycametotownthedaybeforeyesterday。Good-byeforthepresent。“
Soniamadenoreply;thedooropenedandsheslippedin。Shefeltforsomereasonashamedanduneasy。
OnthewaytoPorfiry"s,Razumihinwasobviouslyexcited。
“That"scapital,brother,“herepeatedseveraltimes,“andIamglad!Iamglad！”
“Whatareyougladabout？”Raskolnikovthoughttohimself。
“Ididn"tknowthatyoupledgedthingsattheoldwoman"s,too。
And……wasitlongago?Imean,wasitlongsinceyouwerethere？”
“Whatasimple-heartedfoolheis！”
“Whenwasit？”Raskolnikovstoppedstilltorecollect。“Twoorthreedaysbeforeherdeathitmusthavebeen。ButIamnotgoingtoredeemthethingsnow,“heputinwithasortofhurriedandconspicuoussolicitudeaboutthethings。“I"venotmorethanasilverroubleleft……afterlastnight"saccurseddelirium！”
Helaidspecialemphasisonthedelirium。
“Yes,yes,“Razumihinhastenedtoagree-withwhatwasnotclear。
“Thenthat"swhyyou……werestruck……partly……youknowinyourdeliriumyouwerecontinuallymentioningsomeringsorchains!Yes,yes……that"sclear,it"sallclearnow。“
“Hullo!Howthatideamusthavegotaboutamongthem。Herethismanwillgotothestakeforme,andIfindhimdelightedathavingitclearedupwhyIspokeofringsinmydelirium!Whataholdtheideamusthaveonallofthem！”
“Shallwefindhim？”heaskedsuddenly。
“Oh,yes,“Razumihinansweredquickly。“Heisanicefellowyouwillsee,brother。Ratherclumsy,thatistosay,heisamanofpolishedmanners,butImeanclumsyinadifferentsense。Heisanintelligentfellow,verymuchsoindeed,buthehashisownrangeofideas……Heisincredulous,sceptical,cynical……helikestoimposeonpeople,orrathertomakefunofthem。Hisistheold,circumstantialmethod……Butheunderstandshiswork……
thoroughly……Lastyearheclearedupacaseofmurderinwhichthepolicehadhardlyaclue。Heisvery,veryanxioustomakeyouracquaintance。“
“Onwhatgroundsishesoanxious？”
“Oh,it"snotexactly……yousee,sinceyou"vebeenillIhappentohavementionedyouseveraltimes……So,whenheheardaboutyou……
aboutyourbeingalawstudentandnotabletofinishyourstudies,hesaid,"Whatapity!"AndsoIconcluded……fromeverythingtogether,notonlythat;yesterday,Zametov……youknow,Rodya,Italkedsomenonsenseonthewayhometoyouyesterday,whenIwasdrunk……Iamafraid,brother,ofyourexaggeratingit,yousee。“
“What?ThattheythinkIamamadman?Maybetheyareright,“hesaidwithaconstrainedsmile。
“Yes,yes……Thatis,pooh,no!……ButallthatIsaid(andtherewassomethingelsetoo)itwasallnonsense,drunkennonsense。“
“Butwhyareyouapologizing?Iamsosickofitall！”Raskolnikovcriedwithexaggeratedirritability。Itwaspartlyassumed,however。
“Iknow,Iknow,Iunderstand。Believeme,Iunderstand。One"sashamedtospeakofit。“
“Ifyouareashamed,thendon"tspeakofit。“
Bothweresilent。RazumihinwasmorethanecstaticandRaskolnikovperceiveditwithrepulsion。Hewasalarmed,too,bywhatRazumihinhadjustsaidaboutPorfiry。
“Ishallhavetopullalongfacewithhimtoo,“hethought,withabeatingheart,andheturnedwhite,“anddoitnaturally,too。Butthemostnaturalthingwouldbetodonothingatall。Carefullydonothingatall!No,carefullywouldnotbenaturalagain……Oh,well,weshallseehowitturnsout……Weshallsee……directly。Isitagoodthingtogoornot?Thebutterflyfliestothelight。Myheartisbeating,that"swhat"sbad！”
“Inthisgreyhouse,“saidRazumihin。
“Themostimportantthing,doesPorfiryknowthatIwasattheoldhag"sflatyesterday……andaskedabouttheblood?Imustfindthatoutinstantly,assoonasIgoin,findoutfromhisface;
otherwise……I"llfindout,ifit"smyruin。“
“Isay,brother,“hesaidsuddenly,addressingRazumihin,withaslysmile,“Ihavebeennoticingalldaythatyouseemtobecuriouslyexcited。Isn"titso？”
“Excited?Notabitofit,“saidRazumihin,stungtothequick。
“Yes,brother,Iassureyouit"snoticeable。Why,yousatonyourchairinawayyouneverdosit,ontheedgesomehow,andyouseemedtobewrithingallthetime。Youkeptjumpingupfornothing。Onemomentyouwereangry,andthenextyourfacelookedlikeasweetmeat。
Youevenblushed;especiallywhenyouwereinvitedtodinner,youblushedawfully。“
“Nothingofthesort,nonsense!Whatdoyoumean？”
“Butwhyareyouwrigglingoutofit,likeaschoolboy?ByJove,therehe"sblushingagain。“
“Whatapigyouare！”
“Butwhyareyousoshamefacedaboutit?Romeo!Stay,I"lltellofyouto-day。Ha-ha-ha!I"llmakemotherlaugh,andsomeoneelse,too……“
“Listen,listen,listen,thisisserious……Whatnext,youfiend！”Razumihinwasutterlyoverwhelmed,turningcoldwithhorror。
“Whatwillyoutellthem?Come,brother……foo,whatapigyouare！”
“Youarelikeasummerrose。Andifonlyyouknewhowitsuitsyou;aRomeooversixfoothigh!Andhowyou"vewashedto-day-youcleanedyournails,Ideclare。Eh?That"ssomethingunheardof!Why,I
dobelieveyou"vegotpomaturnonyourhair!Benddown。“
“Pig！”
Raskolnikovlaughedasthoughhecouldnotrestrainhimself。Solaughing,theyenteredPorfiryPetrovitch"sflat。ThisiswhatRaskolnikovwanted：fromwithintheycouldbeheardlaughingastheycamein,stillguffawinginthepassage。
“NotawordhereorI"ll……brainyou！”Razumihinwhisperedfuriously,seizingRaskolnikovbytheshoulder。
ChapterFiveRASKOLNIKOVwasalreadyenteringtheroom。Hecameinlookingasthoughhehadtheutmostdifficultynottoburstoutlaughingagain。
BehindhimRazumihinstrodeingawkyandawkward,shamefacedandredasapeony,withanutterlycrestfallenandferociousexpression。
HisfaceandwholefigurereallywereridiculousatthatmomentandamplyjustifiedRaskolnikov"slaughter。Raskolnikov,notwaitingforanintroduction,bowedtoPorfiryPetrovitch,whostoodinthemiddleoftheroomlookinginquiringlyatthem。Heheldouthishandandshookhands,stillapparentlymakingdesperateeffortstosubduehismirthandutterafewwordstointroducehimself。ButhehadnosoonersucceededinassumingaseriousairandmutteringsomethingwhenhesuddenlyglancedagainasthoughaccidentallyatRazumihin,andcouldnolongercontrolhimself：hisstifledlaughterbrokeoutthemoreirresistiblythemorehetriedtorestrainit。TheextraordinaryferocitywithwhichRazumihinreceivedthis“spontaneous“mirthgavethewholescenetheappearanceofmostgenuinefunandnaturalness。Razumihinstrengthenedthisimpressionasthoughonpurpose。
“Fool!Youfiend,“heroared,wavinghisarmwhichatoncestruckalittleroundtablewithanemptytea-glassonit。Everythingwassentflyingandcrashing。
“Butwhybreakchairs,gentlemen?Youknowit"salosstotheCrown,“PorfiryPetrovitchquotedgaily。
Raskolnikovwasstilllaughing,withhishandinPorfiryPetrovitch"s,butanxiousnottooverdoit,awaitedtherightmomenttoputanaturalendtoit。Razumihin,completelyputtoconfusionbyupsettingthetableandsmashingtheglass,gazedgloomilyatthefragments,cursedandturnedsharplytothewindowwherehestoodlookingoutwithhisbacktothecompanywithafiercelyscowlingcountenance,seeingnothing。PorfiryPetrovitchlaughedandwasreadytogoonlaughing,butobviouslylookedforexplanations。
Zametovhadbeensittinginthecorner,butheroseatthevisitors"
entranceandwasstandinginexpectationwithasmileonhislips,thoughhelookedwithsurpriseandevenitseemedincredulityatthewholesceneandatRaskolnikovwithacertainembarrassment。Zametov"sunexpectedpresencestruckRaskolnikovunpleasantly。
“I"vegottothinkofthat,“hethought。“Excuseme,please,“hebegan,affectingextremeembarrassment。“Raskolnikov。“
“Notatall,verypleasanttoseeyou……andhowpleasantlyyou"vecomein……Why,won"theevensaygood-morning？”PorfiryPetrovitchnoddedatRazumihin。
“UponmyhonourIdon"tknowwhyheisinsucharagewithme。I
onlytoldhimaswecamealongthathewaslikeRomeo……andprovedit。Andthatwasall,Ithink！”
“Pig！”ejaculatedRazumihin,withoutturninground。
“Theremusthavebeenverygravegroundsforit,ifheissofuriousattheword,“Porfirylaughed。
“Oh,yousharplawyer!……Damnyouall！”snappedRazumihin,andsuddenlyburstingoutlaughinghimself,hewentuptoPorfirywithamorecheerfulfaceasthoughnothinghadhappened。“That"lldo!Weareallfools。Tocometobusiness。ThisismyfriendRodionRomanovitchRaskolnikov;inthefirstplacehehasheardofyouandwantstomakeyouracquaintance,andsecondly,hehasalittlematterofbusinesswithyou。Bah!Zametov,whatbroughtyouhere?Haveyoumetbefore?Haveyouknowneachotherlong？”
“Whatdoesthismean？”thoughtRaskolnikovuneasily。
Zametovseemedtakenaback,butnotverymuchso。
“Why,itwasatyourroomswemetyesterday,“hesaideasily。
“ThenIhavebeensparedthetrouble。Alllastweekhewasbeggingmetointroducehimtoyou。Porfiryandyouhavesniffedeachotheroutwithoutme。Whereisyourtobacco？”
PorfiryPetrovitchwaswearingadressing-gown,verycleanlinen,andtrodden-downslippers。Hewasamanofaboutfiveandthirty,short,stouteventocorpulence,andcleanshaven。Heworehishaircutshortandhadalargeroundhead,particularlyprominentattheback。Hissoft,round,rathersnub-nosedfacewasofasicklyyellowishcolour,buthadavigorousandratherironicalexpression。
Itwouldhavebeengood-natured,exceptforalookintheeyes,whichshonewithawatery,mawkishlightunderalmostwhite,blinkingeyelashes。Theexpressionofthoseeyeswasstrangelyoutofkeepingwithhissomewhatwomanishfigure,andgaveitsomethingfarmoreseriousthancouldbeguessedatfirstsight。
AssoonasPorfiryPetrovitchheardthathisvisitorhadalittlematterofbusinesswithhim,hebeggedhimtositdownonthesofaandsatdownhimselfontheotherend,waitingforhimtoexplainhisbusiness,withthatcarefulandover-seriousattentionwhichisatonceoppressiveandembarrassing,especiallytoastranger,andespeciallyifwhatyouarediscussingisinyouropinionoffartoolittleimportanceforsuchexceptionalsolemnity。ButinbriefandcoherentphrasesRaskolnikovexplainedhisbusinessclearlyandexactly,andwassowellsatisfiedwithhimselfthatheevensucceededintakingagoodlookatPorfiry。PorfiryPetrovitchdidnotoncetakehiseyesoffhim。Razumihin,sittingoppositeatthesametable,listenedwarmlyandimpatiently,lookingfromonetotheothereverymomentwithratherexcessiveinterest。
“Fool,“Raskolnikovsworetohimself。
“Youhavetogiveinformationtothepolice,“Porfiryreplied,withamostbusinesslikeair,“thathavinglearntofthisincident,thatisofthemurder,youbegtoinformthelawyerinchargeofthecasethatsuchandsuchthingsbelongtoyou,andthatyoudesiretoredeemthem……or……buttheywillwritetoyou。“
“That"sjustthepoint,thatatthepresentmoment,“Raskolnikovtriedhisutmosttofeignembarrassment,“Iamnotquiteinfunds……
andeventhistriflingsumisbeyondme……Ionlywanted,yousee,forthepresenttodeclarethatthethingsaremine,andthatwhenI
havemoney……“
“That"snomatter,“answeredPorfiryPetrovitch,receivinghisexplanationofhispecuniarypositioncoldly,“butyoucan,ifyouprefer,writestraighttome,tosay,thathavingbeeninformedofthematter,andclaimingsuchandsuchasyourproperty,youbeg……“
“Onanordinarysheetofpaper？”Raskolnikovinterruptedeagerly,againinterestedinthefinancialsideofthequestion。
“Oh,themostordinary,“andsuddenlyPorfiryPetrovitchlookedwithobviousironyathim,screwinguphiseyesandasitwerewinkingathim。ButperhapsitwasRaskolnikov"sfancy,foritalllastedbutamoment。Therewascertainlysomethingofthesort,Raskolnikovcouldhaveswornhewinkedathim,goodnessknowswhy。
“Heknows,“flashedthroughhismindlikelightning。
“Forgivemytroublingyouaboutsuchtrifles,“hewenton,alittledisconcerted,“thethingsareonlyworthfiveroubles,butI
prizethemparticularlyforthesakeofthosefromwhomtheycametome,andImustconfessthatIwasalarmedwhenIheard……“
“That"swhyyouweresomuchstruckwhenImentionedtoZossimovthatPorfirywasinquiringforeveryonewhohadpledges！”Razumihinputinwithobviousintention。
Thiswasreallyunbearable。Raskolnikovcouldnothelpglancingathimwithaflashofvindictiveangerinhisblackeyes,butimmediatelyrecollectedhimself。
“Youseemtobejeeringatme,brother？”hesaidtohim,withawell-feignedirritability。“IdaresayIdoseemtoyouabsurdlyanxiousaboutsuchtrash;butyoumustn"tthinkmeselfishorgraspingforthat,andthesetwothingsmaybeanythingbuttrashinmyeyes。I
toldyoujustnowthatthesilverwatch,thoughit"snotworthacent,istheonlythingleftusofmyfather"s。Youmaylaughatme,butmymotherishere,“heturnedsuddenlytoPorfiry,“andifsheknew,“heturnedagainhurriedlytoRazumihin,carefullymakinghisvoicetremble,“thatthewatchwaslost,shewouldbeindespair!
Youknowwhatwomenare！”
“Notabitofit!Ididn"tmeanthatatall!Quitethecontrary！”
shoutedRazumihindistressed。
“Wasitright?Wasitnatural?DidIoverdoit？”Raskolnikovaskedhimselfinatremor。“WhydidIsaythataboutwomen？”
“Oh,yourmotheriswithyou？”PorfiryPetrovitchinquired。
“Yes。“
“Whendidshecome？”
“Lastnight。“
Porfirypausedasthoughreflecting。
“Yourthingswouldnotinanycasebelost,“hewentoncalmlyandcoldly。“Ihavebeenexpectingyouhereforsometime。“
Andasthoughthatwasamatterofnoimportance,hecarefullyofferedtheash-traytoRazumihin,whowasruthlesslyscatteringcigaretteashoverthecarpet。Raskolnikovshuddered,butPorfirydidnotseemtobelookingathim,andwasstillconcernedwithRazumihin"scigarette。
“What?Expectinghim?Why,didyouknowthathehadpledgesthere？”criedRazumihin。
PorfiryPetrovitchaddressedhimselftoRaskolnikov。
“Yourthings,theringandthewatch,werewrappeduptogether,andonthepaperyournamewaslegiblywritteninpencil,togetherwiththedateonwhichyouleftthemwithher……“
“Howobservantyouare！”Raskolnikovsmiledawkwardly,doinghisveryutmosttolookhimstraightintheface,buthefailed,andsuddenlyadded：
“IsaythatbecauseIsupposetherewereagreatmanypledges……
thatitmustbedifficulttorememberthemall……Butyourememberthemallsoclearly,and……and……“
“Stupid!Feeble！”hethought。“WhydidIaddthat？”
“Butweknowallwhohadpledges,andyouaretheonlyonewhohasn"tcomeforward,“Porfiryansweredwithhardlyperceptibleirony。
“Ihaven"tbeenquitewell。“
“Iheardthattoo。Iheard,indeed,thatyouwereingreatdistressaboutsomething。Youlookpalestill。“
“Iamnotpaleatall……No,Iamquitewell,“Raskolnikovsnappedoutrudelyandangrily,completelychanginghistone。Hisangerwasmounting,hecouldnotrepressit。“AndinmyangerI
shallbetraymyself,“flashedthroughhismindagain。“Whyaretheytorturingme？”
“Notquitewell！”Razumihincaughthimup。“Whatnext!Hewasunconsciousanddeliriousallyesterday。Wouldyoubelieve,Porfiry,assoonasourbackswereturned,hedressed,thoughhecouldhardlystand,andgaveustheslipandwentoffonaspreesomewheretillmidnight,deliriousallthetime!Wouldyoubelieveit!
Extraordinary！”
“Reallydelirious?Youdon"tsayso！”Porfiryshookhisheadinawomanishway。
“Nonsense!Don"tyoubelieveit!Butyoudon"tbelieveitanyway,“
Raskolnikovletslipinhisanger。ButPorfiryPetrovitchdidnotseemtocatchthosestrangewords。
“Buthowcouldyouhavegoneoutifyouhadn"tbeendelirious？”
Razumihingothotsuddenly。“Whatdidyougooutfor?Whatwastheobjectofit?Andwhyonthesly?Wereyouinyoursenseswhenyoudidit?NowthatalldangerisoverIcanspeakplainly。“
“Iwasawfullysickofthemyesterday。“RaskolnikovaddressedPorfirysuddenlywithasmileofinsolentdefiance,“Iranawayfromthemtotakelodgingswheretheywouldn"tfindme,andtookalotofmoneywithme。Mr。Zametovtheresawit。Isay,Mr。Zametov,wasI
sensibleordeliriousyesterday;settleourdispute。“
HecouldhavestrangledZametovatthatmoment,sohatedwerehisexpressionandhissilencetohim。
“Inmyopinionyoutalkedsensiblyandevenartfully,butyouwereextremelyirritable,“Zametovpronounceddryly。
“AndNikodimFomitchwastellingmeto-day,“putinPorfiryPetrovitch,“thathemetyouverylatelastnightinthelodgingofamanwhohadbeenrunover。“
“Andthere,“saidRazumihin,“weren"tyoumadthen?Yougaveyourlastpennytothewidowforthefuneral。Ifyouwantedtohelp,givefifteenortwentyeven,butkeepthreeroublesforyourselfatleast,butheflungawayallthetwenty-fiveatonce！”
“MaybeIfoundatreasuresomewhereandyouknownothingofit?Sothat"swhyIwasliberalyesterday……Mr。ZametovknowsI"vefoundatreasure!Excuseus,please,fordisturbingyouforhalfanhourwithsuchtrivialities,“hesaidturningtoPorfiryPetrovitch,withtremblinglips。“Weareboringyou,aren"twe？”
“Ohno,quitethecontrary,quitethecontrary!Ifonlyyouknewhowyouinterestme!It"sinterestingtolookonandlisten……andIamreallygladyouhavecomeforwardatlast。“
“Butyoumightgiveussometea!Mythroat"sdry,“criedRazumihin。
“Capitalidea!Perhapswewillallkeepyoucompany。Wouldn"tyoulike……somethingmoreessentialbeforetea？”
“Getalongwithyou！”
PorfiryPetrovitchwentouttoordertea。