第10章
"You"vebeensobusyto-day,ArkadyIvanovitch,youhaveforgottentowindthediningroomclock,"shesaid。AllthosesevenyearsI"vewoundthatclockeveryweek,andifIforgotitshewouldalwaysremindme。ThenextdayIsetoffonmywayhere。Igotoutatthestationatdaybreak;I"dbeenasleep,tiredout,withmyeyeshalfopen,Iwasdrinkingsomecoffee。IlookedupandtherewassuddenlyMarfaPetrovnasittingbesidemewithapackofcardsinherhands。
"ShallItellyourfortuneforthejourney,ArkadyIvanovitch?"Shewasagreathandattellingfortunes。Ishallneverforgivemyselffornotaskingherto。Iranawayinafright,and,besides,thebellrang。Iwassittingto-day,feelingveryheavyafteramiserabledinnerfromacookshop;Iwassittingsmoking,allofasuddenMarfaPetrovnaagain。Shecameinverysmartinanewgreensilkdresswithalongtrain。"Goodday,ArkadyIvanovitch!Howdoyoulikemydress?Aniskacan"tmakelikethis。"(Aniskawasadressmakerinthecountry,oneofourformerserfgirlswhohadbeentrainedinMoscow,aprettywench。)Shestoodturningroundbeforeme。Ilookedatthedress,andthenIlookedcarefully,verycarefully,atherface。"Iwonderyoutroubletocometomeaboutsuchtrifles,MarfaPetrovna。""Goodgracious,youwon"tletonedisturbyouaboutanything!"ToteaseherIsaid,"Iwanttogetmarried,MarfaPetrovna。""That"sjustlikeyou,ArkadyIvanovitch;itdoesyouverylittlecredittocomelookingforabridewhenyou"vehardlyburiedyourwife。Andifyoucouldmakeagoodchoice,atleast,butI
knowitwon"tbeforyourhappinessorhers,youwillonlybealaughing-stocktoallgoodpeople。"Thenshewentoutandhertrainseemedtorustle。Isn"titnonsense,eh？”
“Butperhapsyouaretellinglies？”Raskolnikovputin。
“Irarelylie,“answeredSvidrigailovthoughtfully,apparentlynotnoticingtherudenessofthequestion。
“Andinthepast,haveyoueverseenghostsbefore？”
“Y-yes,Ihaveseenthem,butonlyonceinmylife,sixyearsago。I
hadaserf,Filka;justafterhisburialIcalledoutforgetting"Filka,mypipe!"Hecameinandwenttothecupboardwheremypipeswere。Isatstillandthought"heisdoingitoutofrevenge,"becausewehadaviolentquarreljustbeforehisdeath。"Howdareyoucomeinwithaholeinyourelbow,"Isaid。"Goaway,youscamp!"Heturnedandwentout,andnevercameagain。Ididn"ttellMarfaPetrovnaatthetime。Iwantedtohaveaservicesungforhim,butIwasashamed。“
“Youshouldgotoadoctor。“
“IknowIamnotwell,withoutyourtellingme,thoughIdon"tknowwhat"swrong;IbelieveIamfivetimesasstrongasyouare。I
didn"taskyouwhetheryoubelievethatghostsareseen,butwhetheryoubelievethattheyexist。“
“No,Iwon"tbelieveit！”Raskolnikovcried,withpositiveanger。
“Whatdopeoplegenerallysay？”mutteredSvidrigailov,asthoughspeakingtohimself,lookingasideandbowinghishead：“Theysay,"Youareill,sowhatappearstoyouisonlyunrealfantasy。"Butthat"snotstrictlylogical。Iagreethatghostsonlyappeartothesick,butthatonlyprovesthattheyareunabletoappearexcepttothesick,notthattheydon"texist。“
“Nothingofthesort,“Raskolnikovinsistedirritably。
“No?Youdon"tthinkso？”Svidrigailovwenton,lookingathimdeliberately。“Butwhatdoyousaytothisargument(helpmewithit)：
ghostsareasitwereshredsandfragmentsofotherworlds,thebeginningofthem。Amaninhealthhas,ofcourse,noreasontoseethem,becauseheisaboveallamanofthisearthandisboundforthesakeofcompletenessandordertoliveonlyinthislife。Butassoonasoneisill,assoonasthenormalearthlyorderoftheorganismisbroken,onebeginstorealisethepossibilityofanotherworld;andthemoreseriouslyilloneis,thecloserbecomesone"scontactwiththatotherworld,sothatassoonasthemandieshestepsstraightintothatworld。Ithoughtofthatlongago。Ifyoubelieveinafuturelife,youcouldbelieveinthat,too。“
“Idon"tbelieveinafuturelife,“saidRaskolnikov。
Svidrigailovsatlostinthought。
“Andwhatifthereareonlyspidersthere,orsomethingofthatsort,“hesaidsuddenly。
“Heisamadman,“thoughtRaskolnikov。
“Wealwaysimagineeternityassomethingbeyondourconception,somethingvast,vast!Butwhymustitbevast?Insteadofallthat,whatifit"sonelittleroom,likeabathhouseinthecountry,blackandgrimyandspidersineverycorner,andthat"salleternityis?I
sometimesfancyitlikethat。“
“Canitbeyoucanimaginenothingjusterandmorecomfortingthanthat？”Raskolnikovcried,withafeelingofanguish。
“Juster?Andhowcanwetell,perhapsthatisjust,anddoyouknowit"swhatIwouldcertainlyhavemadeit,“answeredSvidrigailov,withavaguesmile。
ThishorribleanswersentacoldchillthroughRaskolnikov。
Svidrigailovraisedhishead,lookedathim,andsuddenlybeganlaughing。
“Onlythink,“hecried,“halfanhouragowehadneverseeneachother,weregardedeachotherasenemies;thereisamatterunsettledbetweenus;we"vethrownitaside,andawaywe"vegoneintotheabstract!Wasn"tIrightinsayingthatwewerebirdsofafeather？”
“Kindlyallowme,“Raskolnikovwentonirritably,“toaskyoutoexplainwhyyouhavehonouredmewithyourvisit……and……andIaminahurry,Ihavenotimetowaste。Iwanttogoout。“
“Byallmeans,byallmeans。Yoursister,AvdotyaRomanovna,isgoingtobemarriedtoMr。Luzhin,PyotrPetrovitch？”
“Canyourefrainfromanyquestionaboutmysisterandfrommentioninghername?Ican"tunderstandhowyoudareutterhernameinmypresence,ifyoureallyareSvidrigailov。“
“Why,butI"vecomeheretospeakabouther;howcanIavoidmentioningher？”
“Verygood,speak,butmakehaste。“
“IamsurethatyoumusthaveformedyourownopinionofthisMr。
Luzhin,whoisaconnectionofminethroughmywife,ifyouhaveonlyseenhimforhalfanhour,orheardanyfactsabouthim。HeisnomatchforAvdotyaRomanovna。IbelieveAvdotyaRomanovnaissacrificingherselfgenerouslyandimprudentlyforthesakeof……
forthesakeofherfamily。IfanciedfromallIhadheardofyouthatyouwouldbeverygladifthematchcouldbebrokenoffwithoutthesacrificeofworldlyadvantages。NowIknowyoupersonally,Iamconvincedofit。“
“Allthisisverynaive……excuseme,Ishouldhavesaidimpudentonyourpart,“saidRaskolnikov。
“YoumeantosaythatIamseekingmyownends。Don"tbeuneasy,RodionRomanovitch,ifIwereworkingformyownadvantage,Iwouldnothavespokenoutsodirectly。Iamnotquiteafool。Iwillconfesssomethingpsychologicallycuriousaboutthat：justnow,defendingmyloveforAvdotyaRomanovna,IsaidIwasmyselfthevictim。Well,letmetellyouthatI"venofeelingoflovenow,nottheslightest,sothatIwondermyselfindeed,forIreallydidfeelsomething……“
“Throughidlenessanddepravity,“Raskolnikovputin。
“Icertainlyamidleanddepraved,butyoursisterhassuchqualitiesthatevenIcouldnothelpbeingimpressedbythem。Butthat"sallnonsense,asIseemyselfnow。“
“Haveyouseenthatlong？”
“Ibegantobeawareofitbefore,butwasonlyperfectlysureofitthedaybeforeyesterday,almostatthemomentIarrivedinPetersburg。IstillfanciedinMoscow,though,thatIwascomingtotrytogetAvdotyaRomanovna"shandandtocutoutMr。Luzhin。“
“Excusemeforinterruptingyou;kindlybebrief,andcometotheobjectofyourvisit。Iaminahurry,Iwanttogoout……“
“Withthegreatestpleasure。Onarrivinghereanddeterminingonacertain……journey,Ishouldliketomakesomenecessarypreliminaryarrangements。Ileftmychildrenwithanaunt;theyarewellprovidedfor;andtheyhavenoneedofmepersonally。AndanicefatherIshouldmake,too!IhavetakennothingbutwhatMarfaPetrovnagavemeayearago。That"senoughforme。Excuseme,Iamjustcomingtothepoint。Beforethejourneywhichmaycomeoff,I
wanttosettleMr。Luzhin,too。It"snotthatIdetesthimsomuch,butitwasthroughhimIquarrelledwithMarfaPetrovnawhenIlearnedthatshehaddishedupthismarriage。IwantnowtoseeAvdotyaRomanovnathroughyourmediation,andifyoulikeinyourpresence,toexplaintoherthatinthefirstplaceshewillnevergainanythingbutharmfromMr。Luzhin。Thenbeggingherpardonforallpastunpleasantness,tomakeherapresentoftenthousandroublesandsoassisttherupturewithMr。Luzhin,arupturetowhichIbelievesheisherselfnotdisinclined,ifshecouldseethewaytoit。“
“Youarecertainlymad,“criedRaskolnikovnotsomuchangeredasastonished。“Howdareyoutalklikethat！”
“Iknewyouwouldscreamatme;butinthefirstplace,thoughI
amnotrich,thistenthousandroublesisperfectlyfree;Ihaveabsolutelynoneedforit。IfAvdotyaRomanovnadoesnotacceptit,Ishallwasteitinsomemorefoolishway。That"sthefirstthing。
Secondly,myconscienceisperfectlyeasy;Imaketheofferwithnoulteriormotive。Youmaynotbelieveit,butintheendAvdotyaRomanovnaandyouwillknow。Thepointis,thatIdidactuallycauseyoursister,whomIgreatlyrespect,sometroubleandunpleasantness,andso,sincerelyregrettingit,Iwant-nottocompensate,nottorepayherfortheunpleasantness,butsimplytodosomethingtoheradvantage,toshowthatIamnot,afterall,privilegedtodonothingbutharm。Iftherewereamillionthfractionofselfinterestinmyoffer,Ishouldnothavemadeitsoopenly;andIshouldnothaveofferedhertenthousandonly,whenfiveweeksagoIofferedhermore,Besides,Imay,perhaps,verysoonmarryayounglady,andthataloneoughttopreventsuspicionofanydesignonAvdotyaRomanovna。Inconclusion,letmesaythatinmarryingMr。Luzhin,sheistakingmoneyjustthesame,onlyfromanotherman。Don"tbeangry,RodionRomanovitch,thinkitovercoollyandquietly。“
Svidrigailovhimselfwasexceedinglycoolandquietashewassayingthis。
“Ibegyoutosaynomore,“saidRaskolnikov。“Inanycasethisisunpardonableimpertinence。“
“Notintheleast。Thenamanmaydonothingbutharmtohisneighbourinthisworld,andispreventedfromdoingthetiniestbitofgoodbytrivialconventionalformalities。That"sabsurd。IfIdied,forinstance,andleftthatsumtoyoursisterinmywill,surelyshewouldn"trefuseit？”
“Verylikelyshewould。“
“Oh,no,indeed。However,ifyourefuseit,sobeit,thoughtenthousandroublesisacapitalthingtohaveonoccasion。InanycaseI
begyoutorepeatwhatIhavesaidtoAvdotyaRomanovna。“
“No,Iwon"t。“
“Inthatcase,RodionRomanovitch,Ishallbeobligedtotryandseehermyselfandworryherbydoingso。“
“AndifIdotellher,willyounottrytoseeher？”
“Idon"tknowreallywhattosay。Ishouldlikeverymuchtoseeheroncemore。“
“Don"thopeforit。“
“I"msorry。Butyoudon"tknowme。Perhapswemaybecomebetterfriends。“
“Youthinkwemaybecomefriends？”
“Andwhynot？”Svidrigailovsaid,smiling。Hestoodupandtookhishat。“Ididn"tquiteintendtodisturbyouandIcameherewithoutreckoningonit……thoughIwasverymuchstruckbyyourfacethismorning。“
“Wheredidyouseemethismorning？”Raskolnikovaskeduneasily。
“Isawyoubychance……Ikeptfancyingthereissomethingaboutyoulikeme……Butdon"tbeuneasy。Iamnotintrusive;Iusedtogetonallrightwithcard-sharpers,andIneverboredPrinceSvirbey,agreatpersonagewhoisadistantrelationofmine,andIcouldwriteaboutRaphael"sMadonnainMadamPrilukov"salbum,andIneverleftMarfaPetrovna"ssideforsevenyears,andIusedtostaythenightatViazemsky"shouseintheHayMarketintheolddays,andImaygoupinaballoonwithBerg,perhaps。“
“Oh,allright。Areyoustartingsoononyourtravels,mayIask？”
“Whattravels？”
“Why,onthat"journey";youspokeofityourself。“
“Ajourney?Oh,yes。Ididspeakofajourney。Well,that"sawidesubject……ifonlyyouknewwhatyouareasking,“headded,andgaveasudden,loud,shortlaugh。“PerhapsI"llgetmarriedinsteadofthejourney。They"remakingamatchforme。“
“Here？”
“Yes。“
“Howhaveyouhadtimeforthat？”
“ButIamveryanxioustoseeAvdotyaRomanovnaonce。Iearnestlybegit。Well,good-byeforthepresent。Oh,yes,Ihaveforgottensomething。Tellyoursister,RodionRomanovitch,thatMarfaPetrovnarememberedherinherwillandleftherthreethousandrubles。
That"sabsolutelycertain。MarfaPetrovnaarrangeditaweekbeforeherdeath,anditwasdoneinmypresence。AvdotyaRomanovnawillbeabletoreceivethemoneyintwoorthreeweeks。“
“Areyoutellingthetruth？”
“Yes,tellher。Well,yourservant。Iamstayingverynearyou。“
Ashewentout,SvidrigailovranupagainstRazumihininthedoorway。
ChapterTwoITWASnearlyeighto"clock。ThetwoyoungmenhurriedtoBakaleyev"s,toarrivebeforeLuzhin。
“Why,whowasthat？”askedRazumihin,assoonastheywereinthestreet。
“ItwasSvidrigailov,thatlandownerinwhosehousemysisterwasinsultedwhenshewastheirgoverness。Throughhispersecutingherwithhisattentions,shewasturnedoutbyhiswife,MarfaPetrovna。
ThisMarfaPetrovnabeggedDounia"sforgivenessafterwards,andshe"sjustdiedsuddenly。Itwasofherweweretalkingthismorning。Idon"tknowwhyI"mafraidofthatman。Hecamehereatonceafterhiswife"sfuneral。Heisverystrange,andisdeterminedondoingsomething……WemustguardDouniafromhim……that"swhatI
wantedtotellyou,doyouhear？”
“Guardher!WhatcanhedotoharmAvdotyaRomanovna?Thankyou,Rodya,forspeakingtomelikethat……Wewill,wewillguardher。
Wheredoeshelive？”
“Idon"tknow。“
“Whydidn"tyouask?Whatapity!I"llfindout,though。“
“Didyouseehim？”askedRaskolnikovafterapause。
“Yes,Inoticedhim,Inoticedhimwell。“
“Youdidreallyseehim?Yousawhimclearly？”Raskolnikovinsisted。
“Yes,Irememberhimperfectly,Ishouldknowhiminathousand;I
haveagoodmemoryforfaces。“
Theyweresilentagain。
“Hm!……that"sallright,“mutteredRaskolnikov。“Doyouknow,I
fancied……Ikeepthinkingthatitmayhavebeenanhallucination。“
“Whatdoyoumean?Idon"tunderstandyou。“
“Well,youallsay,“Raskolnikovwenton,twistinghismouthintoasmile,“thatIammad。IthoughtjustnowthatperhapsIreallyammad,andhaveonlyseenaphantom。“
“Whatdoyoumean？”
“Why,whocantell?PerhapsIamreallymad,andperhapseverythingthathappenedallthesedaysmaybeonlyimagination。“
“Ach,Rodya,youhavebeenupsetagain!……Butwhatdidhesay,whatdidhecomefor？”
Raskolnikovdidnotanswer。Razumihinthoughtaminute。
“Nowletmetellyoumystory,“hebegan,“Icametoyou,youwereasleep。ThenwehaddinnerandthenIwenttoPorfiry"s,Zametovwasstillwithhim。Itriedtobegin,butitwasnouse。Icouldn"tspeakintherightway。Theydon"tseemtounderstandandcan"tunderstand,butarenotabitashamed。IdrewPorfirytothewindow,andbegantalkingtohim,butitwasstillnouse。HelookedawayandIlookedaway。AtlastIshookmyfistinhisuglyface,andtoldhimasacousinI"dbrainhim。Hemerelylookedatme,Icursedandcameaway。Thatwasall。Itwasverystupid。ToZametovIdidn"tsayaword。But,yousee,IthoughtI"dmadeamessofit,butasI
wentdownstairsabrilliantideastruckme：whyshouldwetrouble?
Ofcourseifyouwereinanydangeroranything,butwhyneedyoucare?Youneedn"tcareahangforthem。Weshallhavealaughatthemafterwards,andifIwereinyourplaceI"dmystifythemmorethanever。Howashamedthey"llbeafterwards!Hangthem!Wecanthrashthemafterwards,butlet"slaughatthemnow！”
“Tobesure,“answeredRaskolnikov。“Butwhatwillyousayto-morrow？”hethoughttohimself。Strangetosay,tillthatmomentithadneveroccurredtohimtowonderwhatRazumihinwouldthinkwhenheknew。Ashethoughtit,Raskolnikovlookedathim。Razumihin"saccountofhisvisittoPorfiryhadverylittleinterestforhim,somuchhadcomeandgonesincethen。
InthecorridortheycameuponLuzhin;hehadarrivedpunctuallyateight,andwaslookingforthenumber,sothatallthreewentintogetherwithoutgreetingorlookingatoneanother。Theyoungmenwalkedinfirst,whilePyotrPetrovitch,forgoodmanners,lingeredalittleinthepassage,takingoffhiscoat。PulcheriaAlexandrovnacameforwardatoncetogreethiminthedoorway,Douniawaswelcomingherbrother。PyotrPetrovitchwalkedinandquiteamiably,thoughwithredoubleddignity,bowedtotheladies。Helooked,however,asthoughhewerealittleputoutandcouldnotyetrecoverhimself。
PulcheriaAlexandrovna,whoseemedalsoalittleembarrassed,hastenedtomakethemallsitdownattheroundtablewhereasamovarwasboiling。DouniaandLuzhinwerefacingoneanotheronoppositesidesofthetable。RazumihinandRaskolnikovwerefacingPulcheriaAlexandrovna,RazumihinwasnexttoLuzhinandRaskolnikovwasbesidehissister。
Amoment"ssilencefollowed。PyotrPetrovitchdeliberatelydrewoutacambrichandkerchiefreekingofscentandblewhisnosewithanairofabenevolentmanwhofelthimselfslighted,andwasfirmlyresolvedtoinsistonanexplanation。Inthepassagetheideahadoccurredtohimtokeeponhisovercoatandwalkaway,andsogivethetwoladiesasharpandemphaticlessonandmakethemfeelthegravityoftheposition。Buthecouldnotbringhimselftodothis。
Besides,hecouldnotendureuncertaintyandhewantedanexplanation：
ifhisrequesthadbeensoopenlydisobeyed,therewassomethingbehindit,andinthatcaseitwasbettertofinditoutbeforehand;
itrestedwithhimtopunishthemandtherewouldalwaysbetimeforthat。
“Itrustyouhadafavourablejourney,“heinquiredofficiallyofPulcheriaAlexandrovna。
“Oh,very,PyotrPetrovitch。“
“Iamgratifiedtohearit。AndAvdotyaRomanovnaisnotoverfatiguedeither？”
“Iamyoungandstrong,Idon"tgettired,butitwasagreatstrainformother,“answeredDounia。
“That"sunavoidable;ournationalrailwaysareofterriblelength。
"MotherRussia,"astheysay,isavastcountry……Inspiteofallmydesiretodoso,Iwasunabletomeetyouyesterday。ButItrustallpassedoffwithoutinconvenience？”
“Oh,no,PyotrPetrovitch,itwasallterriblydisheartening,“
PulcheriaAlexandrovnahastenedtodeclarewithpeculiarintonation,“andifDmitriProkofitchhadnotbeensentus,IreallybelievebyGodHimself,weshouldhavebeenutterlylost。Here,heis!DmitriProkofitchRazumihin,“sheadded,introducinghimtoLuzhin。
“Ihadthepleasure……yesterday,“mutteredPyotrPetrovitchwithahostileglancesidelongatRazumihin;thenhescowledandwassilent。
PyotrPetrovitchbelongedtothatclassofpersons,onthesurfaceverypoliteinsociety,whomakeagreatpointofpunctiliousness,butwho,directlytheyarecrossedinanything,arecompletelydisconcerted,andbecomemorelikesacksofflourthanelegantandlivelymenofsociety。Againallwassilent;Raskolnikovwasobstinatelymute,AvdotyaRomanovnawasunwillingtoopentheconversationtoosoon。Razumihinhadnothingtosay,soPulcheriaAlexandrovnawasanxiousagain。
“MarfaPetrovnaisdead,haveyouheard？”shebeganhavingrecoursetoherleadingitemofconversation。
“Tobesure,Iheardso。Iwasimmediatelyinformed,andIhavecometomakeyouacquaintedwiththefactthatArkadyIvanovitchSvidrigailovsetoffinhasteforPetersburgimmediatelyafterhiswife"sfuneral。SoatleastIhaveexcellentauthorityforbelieving。“
“ToPetersburg?here？”Douniaaskedinalarmandlookedathermother。
“Yes,indeed,anddoubtlessnotwithoutsomedesign,havinginviewtherapidityofhisdeparture,andallthecircumstancesprecedingit。“
“Goodheavens!won"theleaveDouniainpeaceevenhere？”criedPulcheriaAlexandrovna。
“IimaginethatneitheryounorAvdotyaRomanovnahaveanygroundsforuneasiness,unless,ofcourse,youareyourselvesdesirousofgettingintocommunicationwithhim。FormypartIamonmyguard,andamnowdiscoveringwhereheislodging。“
“Oh,PyotrPetrovitch,youwouldnotbelievewhatafrightyouhavegivenme,“PulcheriaAlexandrovnawenton。“I"veonlyseenhimtwice,butIthoughthimterrible,terrible!IamconvincedthathewasthecauseofMarfaPetrovna"sdeath。“
“It"simpossibletobecertainaboutthat。Ihavepreciseinformation。Idonotdisputethathemayhavecontributedtoacceleratethecourseofeventsbythemoralinfluence,sotosay,oftheaffront;butastothegeneralconductandmoralcharacteristicsofthatpersonage,Iaminagreementwithyou。Idonotknowwhetherheiswelloffnow,andpreciselywhatMarfaPetrovnalefthim;thiswillbeknowntomewithinaveryshortperiod;butnodoubthereinPetersburg,ifhehasanypecuniaryresources,hewillrelapseatonceintohisoldways。Heisthemostdepraved,andabjectlyviciousspecimenofthatclassofmen。IhaveconsiderablereasontobelievethatMarfaPetrovna,whowassounfortunateastofallinlovewithhimandtopayhisdebtseightyearsago,wasofservicetohimalsoinanotherway。Solelybyherexertionsandsacrifices,acriminalcharge,involvinganelementoffantasticandhomicidalbrutalityforwhichhemightwellhavebeensentencedtoSiberia,washushedup。That"sthesortofmanheis,ifyoucaretoknow。“
“Goodheavens！”criedPulcheriaAlexandrovna。Raskolnikovlistenedattentively。
“Areyouspeakingthetruthwhenyousaythatyouhavegoodevidenceofthis？”Douniaaskedsternlyandemphatically。
“IonlyrepeatwhatIwastoldinsecretbyMarfaPetrovna。Imustobservethatfromthelegalpointofviewthecasewasfarfromclear。
Therewas,andIbelievestillis,livinghereawomancalledResslich,aforeigner,wholentsmallsumsofmoneyatinterest,anddidothercommissions,andwiththiswomanSvidrigailovhadforalongwhilecloseandmysteriousrelations。Shehadarelation,anieceI
believe,livingwithher,adeafanddumbgirloffifteen,orperhapsnotmorethanfourteen。Resslichhatedthisgirl,andgrudgedhereverycrust;sheusedtobeathermercilessly。Onedaythegirlwasfoundhanginginthegarret。Attheinquesttheverdictwassuicide。Aftertheusualproceedingsthematterended,but,lateron,informationwasgiventhatthechildhadbeen……cruellyoutragedbySvidrigailov。Itistrue,thiswasnotclearlyestablished,theinformationwasgivenbyanotherGermanwomanofloosecharacterwhosewordcouldnotbetrusted;nostatementwasactuallymadetothepolice,thankstoMarfaPetrovna"smoneyandexertions;itdidnotgetbeyondgossip。Andyetthestoryisaverysignificantone。Youheard,nodoubt,AvdotyaRomanovna,whenyouwerewiththemthestoryoftheservantPhilipwhodiedofilltreatmenthereceivedsixyearsago,beforetheabolitionofserfdom。“
“IheardonthecontrarythatthisPhiliphangedhimself。“
“Quiteso,butwhatdrovehim,orratherperhapsdisposedhim,tosuicide,wasthesystematicpersecutionandseverityofMr。
Svidrigailov。“
“Idon"tknowthat,“answeredDounia,dryly。“IonlyheardaqueerstorythatPhilipwasasortofhypochondriac,asortofdomesticphilosopher,theservantsusedtosay,"hereadhimselfsilly,"andthathehangedhimselfpartlyonaccountofMr。Svidrigailov"smockeryofhimandnothisblows。WhenIwastherehebehavedwelltotheservants,andtheywereactuallyfondofhim,thoughtheycertainlydidblamehimforPhilip"sdeath。“
“Iperceive,AvdotyaRomanovna,thatyouseemdisposedtoundertakehisdefenceallofasudden,“Luzhinobserved,twistinghislipsintoanambiguoussmile,“there"snodoubtthatheisanastuteman,andinsinuatingwhereladiesareconcerned,ofwhichMarfaPetrovna,whohasdiedsostrangely,isaterribleinstance。Myonlydesirehasbeentobeofservicetoyouandyourmotherwithmyadvice,inviewoftherenewedeffortswhichmaycertainlybeanticipatedfromhim。Formypartit"smyfirmconviction,thathewillendinadebtor"sprisonagain。MarfaPetrovnahadnottheslightestintentionofsettlinganythingsubstantialonhim,havingregardforhischildren"sinterests,and,ifshelefthimanything,itwouldonlybethemerestsufficiency,somethinginsignificantandephemeral,whichwouldnotlastayearforamanofhishabits。“
“PyotrPetrovitch,Ibegyou,“saidDounia,“saynomoreofMr。
Svidrigailov。Itmakesmemiserable。“
“Hehasjustbeentoseeme,“saidRaskolnikov,breakinghissilenceforthefirsttime。
Therewereexclamationsfromall,andtheyallturnedtohim。EvenPyotrPetrovitchwasroused。
“Anhourandahalfago,hecameinwhenIwasasleep,wakedme,andintroducedhimself,“Raskolnikovcontinued。“Hewasfairlycheerfulandatease,andquitehopesthatweshallbecomefriends。Heisparticularlyanxiousbytheway,Dounia,foraninterviewwithyou,atwhichheaskedmetoassist。Hehasapropositiontomaketoyou,andhetoldmeaboutit。Hetoldme,too,thataweekbeforeherdeathMarfaPetrovnaleftyouthreethousandroublesinherwill,Dounia,andthatyoucanreceivethemoneyveryshortly。“
“ThankGod！”criedPulcheriaAlexandrovna,crossingherself。“Prayforhersoul,Dounia！”
“It"safact！”brokefromLuzhin。
“Tellus,whatmore？”DouniaurgedRaskolnikov。
“Thenhesaidthathewasn"trichandalltheestatewaslefttohischildrenwhoarenowwithanaunt,thenthathewasstayingsomewherenotfarfromme,butwhere,Idon"tknow,Ididn"task……“
“Butwhat,whatdoeshewanttoproposetoDounia？”criedPulcheriaAlexandrovnainafright。“Didhetellyou？”
“Yes。“
“Whatwasit？”
“I"lltellyouafterwards。“
Raskolnikovceasedspeakingandturnedhisattentiontohistea。
PyotrPetrovitchlookedathiswatch。
“Iamcompelledtokeepabusinessengagement,andsoIshallnotbeinyourway,“headdedwithanairofsomepiqueandhebegangettingup。
“Don"tgo,PyotrPetrovitch,“saidDounia,“youintendedtospendtheevening。Besides,youwroteyourselfthatyouwantedtohaveanexplanationwithmother。“
“Preciselyso,AvdotyaRomanovna,“PyotrPetrovitchansweredimpressively,sittingdownagain,butstillholdinghishat。“I
certainlydesiredanexplanationwithyouandyourhonouredmotheruponaveryimportantpointindeed。ButasyourbrothercannotspeakopenlyinmypresencetosomeproposalsofMr。Svidrigailov,I,too,donotdesireandamnotabletospeakopenly……inthepresenceofothers……ofcertainmattersofthegreatestgravity。Moreover,mymostweightyandurgentrequesthasbeendisregarded……“
Assuminganaggrievedair,Luzhinrelapsedintodignifiedsilence。
“Yourrequestthatmybrothershouldnotbepresentatourmeetingwasdisregardedsolelyatmyinstance,“saidDounia。“Youwrotethatyouhadbeeninsultedbymybrother;Ithinkthatthismustbeexplainedatonce,andyoumustbereconciled。AndifRodyareallyhasinsultedyou,thenheshouldandwillapologise。“
PyotrPetrovitchtookastrongerline。
“Thereareinsults,AvdotyaRomanovna,whichnogood-willcanmakeusforget。Thereisalineineverythingwhichitisdangeroustooverstep;andwhenithasbeenoverstepped,thereisnoreturn。“
“Thatwasn"twhatIwasspeakingofexactly,PyotrPetrovitch,“
Douniainterruptedwithsomeimpatience。“Pleaseunderstandthatourwholefuturedependsnowonwhetherallthisisexplainedandsetrightassoonaspossible。ItellyoufranklyatthestartthatI
cannotlookatitinanyotherlight,andifyouhavetheleastregardforme,allthisbusinessmustbeendedto-day,howeverhardthatmaybe。Irepeatthatifmybrotheristoblamehewillaskyourforgiveness。“
“Iamsurprisedatyourputtingthequestionlikethat,“saidLuzhin,gettingmoreandmoreirritated。“Esteeming,andsotosay,adoringyou,Imayatthesametime,verywellindeed,beabletodislikesomememberofyourfamily。ThoughIlayclaimtothehappinessofyourhand,Icannotacceptdutiesincompatiblewith……“
“Ah,don"tbesoreadytotakeoffence,PyotrPetrovitch,“Douniainterruptedwithfeeling,“andbethesensibleandgenerousmanIhavealwaysconsidered,andwishtoconsider,youtobe。I"vegivenyouagreatpromise,Iamyourbetrothed。Trustmeinthismatterand,believeme,Ishallbecapableofjudgingimpartially。Myassumingthepartofjudgeisasmuchasurpriseformybrotherasforyou。WhenIinsistedonhiscomingtoourinterviewto-dayafteryourletter,ItoldhimnothingofwhatImeanttodo。Understandthat,ifyouarenotreconciled,Imustchoosebetweenyou-itmustbeeitheryouorhe。Thatishowthequestionrestsonyoursideandonhis。Idon"twanttobemistakeninmychoice,andImustnotbe。ForyoursakeI
mustbreakoffwithmybrother,formybrother"ssakeImustbreakoffwithyou。Icanfindoutforcertainnowwhetherheisabrothertome,andIwanttoknowit;andofyou,whetherIamdeartoyou,whetheryouesteemme,whetheryouarethehusbandforme。“
“AvdotyaRomanovna,“Luzhindeclaredhuffily,“yourwordsareoftoomuchconsequencetome;Iwillsaymore,theyareoffensiveinviewofthepositionIhavethehonourtooccupyinrelationtoyou。Tosaynothingofyourstrangeandoffensivesettingmeonalevelwithanimpertinentboy,youadmitthepossibilityofbreakingyourpromisetome。Yousay"youorhe,"showingtherebyofhowlittleconsequenceI
aminyoureyes……Icannotletthispassconsideringtherelationshipand……theobligationsexistingbetweenus。“
“What！”criedDounia,flushing。“Isetyourinterestbesideallthathashithertobeenmostpreciousinmylife,whathasmadeupthewholeofmylife,andhereyouareoffendedatmymakingtoolittleaccountofyou。“
Raskolnikovsmiledsarcastically,Razumihinfidgeted,butPyotrPetrovitchdidnotacceptthereproof;onthecontrary,ateverywordhebecamemorepersistentandirritable,asthoughherelishedit。
“Loveforthefuturepartnerofyourlife,foryourhusband,oughttooutweighyourloveforyourbrother,“hepronouncedsententiously,“andinanycaseIcannotbeputonthesamelevel……AlthoughIsaidsoemphaticallythatIwouldnotspeakopenlyinyourbrother"spresence,nevertheless,Iintendnowtoaskyourhonouredmotherforanecessaryexplanationonapointofgreatimportancecloselyaffectingmydignity。Yourson,“heturnedtoPulcheriaAlexandrovna,“yesterdayinthepresenceofMr。Razsudkin(or……Ithinkthat"sit?excusemeIhaveforgottenyoursurname,“hebowedpolitelytoRazumihin)“insultedmebymisrepresentingtheideaIexpressedtoyouinaprivateconversation,drinkingcoffee,thatis,thatmarriagewithapoorgirlwhohashadexperienceoftroubleismoreadvantageousfromtheconjugalpointofviewthanwithonewhohaslivedinluxury,sinceitismoreprofitableforthemoralcharacter。Yoursonintentionallyexaggeratedthesignificanceofmywordsandmadethemridiculous,accusingmeofmaliciousintentions,and,asfarasIcouldsee,relieduponyourcorrespondencewithhim。Ishallconsidermyselfhappy,PulcheriaAlexandrovna,ifitispossibleforyoutoconvincemeofanoppositeconclusion,andtherebyconsideratelyreassureme。KindlyletmeknowinwhattermspreciselyyourepeatedmywordsinyourlettertoRodionRomanovitch。“
“Idon"tremember,“falteredPulcheriaAlexandrovna。“IrepeatedthemasIunderstoodthem。Idon"tknowhowRodyarepeatedthemtoyou,perhapsheexaggerated。“
“Hecouldnothaveexaggeratedthem,exceptatyourinstigation。“
“PyotrPetrovitch,“PulcheriaAlexandrovnadeclaredwithdignity,“theproofthatDouniaandIdidnottakeyourwordsinaverybadsenseisthefactthatwearehere。“
“Good,mother,“saidDouniaapprovingly。
“Thenthisismyfaultagain,“saidLuzhin,aggrieved。
“Well,PyotrPetrovitch,youkeepblamingRodion,butyouyourselfhavejustwrittenwhatwasfalseabouthim,“PulcheriaAlexandrovnaadded,gainingcourage。
“Idon"trememberwritinganythingfalse。“
“Youwrote,“Raskolnikovsaidsharply,notturningtoLuzhin,“thatIgavemoneyyesterdaynottothewidowofthemanwhowaskilled,aswasthefact,buttohisdaughter(whomIhadneverseentillyesterday)。Youwrotethistomakedissensionbetweenmeandmyfamily,andforthatobjectaddedcoarseexpressionsabouttheconductofagirlwhomyoudon"tknow。Allthatismeanslander。“
“Excuseme,sir,“saidLuzhin,quiveringwithfury。“Ienlargeduponyourqualitiesandconductinmylettersolelyinresponsetoyoursister"sandmother"sinquirieshowIfoundyouandwhatimpressionyoumadeonme。Asforwhatyou"vealludedtoinmyletter,besogoodastopointoutonewordoffalsehood,show,thatis,thatyoudidn"tthrowawayyourmoney,andthattherearenotworthlesspersonsinthatfamily,howeverunfortunate。“
“Tomythinking,youwithallyourvirtuesarenotworththelittlefingerofthatunfortunategirlatwhomyouthrowstones。“
“Wouldyougosofarthenastoletherassociatewithyourmotherandsister？”
“Ihavedonesoalready,ifyoucaretoknow。Imadehersitdownto-daywithmotherandDounia。“
“Rodya！”criedPulcheriaAlexandrovna。Douniacrimsoned,Razumihinknittedhisbrows。Luzhinsmiledwithloftysarcasm。
“Youmayseeforyourself,AvdotyaRomanovna,“hesaid,“whetheritispossibleforustoagree。Ihopenowthatthisquestionisatanend,onceandforall。Iwillwithdraw,thatImaynothinderthepleasuresoffamilyintimacy,andthediscussionofsecrets。“Hegotupfromhischairandtookhishat。“Butinwithdrawing,IventuretorequestthatforthefutureImaybesparedsimilarmeetings,and,sotosay,compromises。Iappealparticularlytoyou,honouredPulcheriaAlexandrovna,onthissubject,themoreasmyletterwasaddressedtoyouandtonooneelse。“
PulcheriaAlexandrovnawasalittleoffended。
“Youseemtothinkwearecompletelyunderyourauthority,PyotrPetrovitch。Douniahastoldyouthereasonyourdesirewasdisregarded,shehadthebestintentions。Andindeedyouwriteasthoughyouwerelayingcommandsuponme。Arewetoconsidereverydesireofyoursasacommand?Letmetellyouonthecontrarythatyououghttoshowparticulardelicacyandconsiderationforusnow,becausewehavethrownupeverything,andhavecomehererelyingonyou,andsoweareinanycaseinasenseinyourhands。“
“Thatisnotquitetrue,PulcheriaAlexandrovna,especiallyatthepresentmoment,whenthenewshascomeofMarfaPetrovna"slegacy,whichseemsindeedveryapropos,judgingfromthenewtoneyoutaketome,“headdedsarcastically。
“Judgingfromthatremark,wemaycertainlypresumethatyouwerereckoningonourhelplessness,“Douniaobservedirritably。
“ButnowinanycaseIcannotreckononit,andIparticularlydesirenottohinderyourdiscussionofthesecretproposalsofArkadyIvanovitchSvidrigailov,whichhehasentrustedtoyourbrotherandwhichhave,Iperceive,agreatandpossiblyaveryagreeableinterestforyou。“
“Goodheavens！”criedPulcheriaAlexandrovna。
Razumihincouldnotsitstillonhischair。
“Aren"tyouashamednow,sister？”askedRaskolnikov。
“Iamashamed,Rodya,“saidDounia。“PyotrPetrovitch,goaway,“sheturnedtohim,whitewithanger。
PyotrPetrovitchhadapparentlynotatallexpectedsuchaconclusion。Hehadtoomuchconfidenceinhimself,inhispowerandinthehelplessnessofhisvictims。Hecouldnotbelieveitevennow。
Heturnedpale,andhislipsquivered。
“AvdotyoRomanovna,ifIgooutofthisdoornow,aftersuchadismissal,then,youmayreckononit,Iwillnevercomeback。
Considerwhatyouaredoing。Mywordisnottobeshaken。“
“Whatinsolence！”criedDounia,springingupfromherseat。“Idon"twantyoutocomebackagain。“
“What!Sothat"showitstands！”criedLuzhin,utterlyunabletothelastmomenttobelieveintheruptureandsocompletelythrownoutofhisreckoningnow。“Sothat"showitstands!Butdoyouknow,AvdotyaRomanovna,thatImightprotest？”
“Whatrighthaveyoutospeaktoherlikethat？”PulcheriaAlexandrovnaintervenedhotly。“Andwhatcanyouprotestabout?Whatrightshaveyou?AmItogivemyDouniatoamanlikeyou?Goaway,leaveusaltogether!Wearetoblameforhavingagreedtoawrongaction,andIaboveall……“
“Butyouhaveboundme,PulcheriaAlexandrovna,“Luzhinstormedinafrenzy,“byyourpromise,andnowyoudenyitand……besides……Ihavebeenledonaccountofthatintoexpenses……“
ThislastcomplaintwassocharacteristicofPyotrPetrovitch,thatRaskolnikov,palewithangerandwiththeeffortofrestrainingit,couldnothelpbreakingintolaughter。ButPulcheriaAlexandrovnawasfurious。
“Expenses?Whatexpenses?Areyouspeakingofourtrunk?Buttheconductorbroughtitfornothingforyou。Mercyonus,wehaveboundyou!Whatareyouthinkingabout,PyotrPetrovitch,itwasyouboundus,handandfoot,notwe！”
“Enough,mother,nomoreplease,“AvdotyaRomanovnaimplored。“PyotrPetrovitch,dobekindandgo！”
“Iamgoing,butonelastword,“hesaid,quiteunabletocontrolhimself。“YourmammaseemstohaveentirelyforgottenthatImadeupmymindtotakeyou,sotospeak,afterthegossipofthetownhadspreadalloverthedistrictinregardtoyourreputation。
Disregardingpublicopinionforyoursakeandreinstatingyourreputation,Icertainlymightverywellreckononafittingreturn,andmightindeedlookforgratitudeonyourpart。Andmyeyeshaveonlynowbeenopened!IseemyselfthatImayhaveactedvery,veryrecklesslyindisregardingtheuniversalverdict……“
“Doesthefellowwanthisheadsmashed？”criedRazumihin,jumpingup。
“Youareameanandspitefulman！”criedDounia。
“Notaword!Notamovement！”criedRaskolnikov,holdingRazumihinback;thengoingcloseuptoLuzhin,“Kindlyleavetheroom！”hesaidquietlyanddistinctly,“andnotawordmoreor……“
PyotrPetrovitchgazedathimforsomesecondswithapalefacethatworkedwithanger,thenheturned,wentout,andrarelyhasanymancarriedawayinhisheartsuchvindictivehatredashefeltagainstRaskolnikov。Him,andhimalone,heblamedforeverything。Itisnoteworthythatashewentdownstairshestillimaginedthathiscasewasperhapsnotutterlylost,andthat,sofarastheladieswereconcerned,allmight“verywellindeed“besetrightagain。
ChapterThreeTHEFACTwasthatuptothelastmomenthehadneverexpectedsuchanending;hehadbeenoverbearingtothelastdegree,neverdreamingthattwodestituteanddefencelesswomencouldescapefromhiscontrol。Thisconvictionwasstrengthenedbyhisvanityandconceit,aconceittothepointoffatuity。PyotrPetrovitch,whohadmadehiswayupfrominsignificance,wasmorbidlygiventoself-admiration,hadthehighestopinionofhisintelligenceandcapacities,andsometimesevengloatedinsolitudeoverhisimageintheglass。Butwhathelovedandvaluedaboveallwasthemoneyhehadamassedbyhislabour,andbyallsortsofdevices：thatmoneymadehimtheequalofallwhohadbeenhissuperiors。
WhenhehadbitterlyremindedDouniathathehaddecidedtotakeherinspiteofevilreport,PyotrPetrovitchhadspokenwithperfectsincerityandhad,indeed,feltgenuinelyindignantatsuch“blackingratitude。“Andyet,whenhemadeDouniahisoffer,hewasfullyawareofthegroundlessnessofallthegossip。ThestoryhadbeeneverywherecontradictedbyMarfaPetrovna,andwasbythendisbelievedbyallthetownspeople,whowerewarminDounia"adefence。Andhewouldnothavedeniedthatheknewallthatatthetime。YethestillthoughthighlyofhisownresolutioninliftingDouniatohislevelandregardeditassomethingheroic。InspeakingofittoDounia,hehadletoutthesecretfeelinghecherishedandadmired,andhecouldnotunderstandthatothersshouldfailtoadmireittoo。HehadcalledonRaskolnikovwiththefeelingsofabenefactorwhoisabouttoreapthefruitsofhisgooddeedsandtohearagreeableflattery。Andashewentdownstairsnow,heconsideredhimselfmostundeservedlyinjuredandunrecognised。
Douniawassimplyessentialtohim;todowithoutherwasunthinkable。Formanyyearshehadvoluptuousdreamsofmarriage,buthehadgoneonwaitingandamassingmoney。Hebroodedwithrelish,inprofoundsecret,overtheimageofagirl-virtuous,poor(shemustbepoor),veryyoung,verypretty,ofgoodbirthandeducation,verytimid,onewhohadsufferedmuch,andwascompletelyhumbledbeforehim,onewhowouldallherlifelookonhimashersaviour,worshiphim,admirehimandonlyhim。Howmanyscenes,howmanyamorousepisodeshehadimaginedonthisseductiveandplayfultheme,whenhisworkwasover!And,behold,thedreamofsomanyyearswasallbutrealised;thebeautyandeducationofAvdotyaRomanovnahadimpressedhim;herhelplesspositionhadbeenagreatallurement;inherhehadfoundevenmorethanhedreamedof。Herewasagirlofpride,character,virtue,ofeducationandbreedingsuperiortohisown(hefeltthat),andthiscreaturewouldbeslavishlygratefulallherlifeforhisheroiccondescension,andwouldhumbleherselfinthedustbeforehim,andhewouldhaveabsolute,unboundedpoweroverher!……Notlongbefore,hehad,too,afterlongreflectionandhesitation,madeanimportantchangeinhiscareerandwasnowenteringonawidercircleofbusiness。Withthischangehischerisheddreamsofrisingintoahigherclassofsocietyseemedlikelytoberealised……Hewas,infact,determinedtotryhisfortuneinPetersburg。Heknewthatwomencoulddoaverygreatdeal。Thefascinationofacharming,virtuous,highlyeducatedwomanmightmakehiswayeasier,mightdowondersinattractingpeopletohim,throwinganaureoleroundhim,andnoweverythingwasinruins!Thissuddenhorribleruptureaffectedhimlikeaclapofthunder;itwaslikeahideousjoke,anabsurdity。Hehadonlybeenatinybitmasterful,hadnoteventimetospeakout,hadsimplymadeajoke,beencarriedaway-andithadendedsoseriously。And,ofcourse,too,hedidloveDouniainhisownway;healreadypossessedherinhisdreams-andallatonce!No!Thenextday,theverynextday,itmustallbesetright,smoothedover,settled。Aboveallhemustcrushthatconceitedmilksopwhowasthecauseofitall。WithasickfeelinghecouldnothelprecallingRazumihintoo,but,hesoonreassuredhimselfonthatscore;asthoughafellowlikethatcouldbeputonalevelwithhim!ThemanhereallydreadedinearnestwasSvidrigailov……Hehad,inshort,agreatdealtoattendto-
“No,I,Iammoretoblamethananyone！”saidDounia,kissingandembracinghermother。“Iwastemptedbyhismoney,butonmyhonour,brother,Ihadnoideahewassuchabaseman。IfIhadseenthroughhimbefore,nothingwouldhavetemptedme!Don"tblameme,brother！”
“Godhasdeliveredus!Godhasdeliveredus！”PulcheriaAlexandrovnamuttered,buthalfconsciously,asthoughscarcelyabletorealisewhathadhappened。
Theywereallrelieved,andinfiveminutestheywerelaughing。OnlynowandthenDouniaturnedwhiteandfrowned,rememberingwhathadpassed。PulcheriaAlexandrovnawassurprisedtofindthatshe,too,wasglad：shehadonlythatmorningthoughtrupturewithLuzhinaterriblemisfortune。Razumihinwasdelighted。Hedidnotyetdaretoexpresshisjoyfully,buthewasinafeverofexcitementasthoughaton-weighthadfallenoffhisheart。Nowhehadtherighttodevotehislifetothem,toservethem……Anythingmighthappennow!Buthefeltafraidtothinkoffurtherpossibilitiesanddarednotlethisimaginationrange。ButRaskolnikovsatstillinthesameplace,almostsullenandindifferent。ThoughhehadbeenthemostinsistentongettingridofLuzhin,heseemednowtheleastconcernedatwhathadhappened。Douniacouldnothelpthinkingthathewasstillangrywithher,andPulcheriaAlexandrovnawatchedhimtimidly。
“WhatdidSvidrigailovsaytoyou？”saidDounia,approachinghim。
“Yes,yes！”criedPulcheriaAlexandrovna。
Raskolnikovraisedhishead。
“Hewantstomakeyouapresentoftenthousandroublesandhedesirestoseeyouonceinmypresence。“
“Seeher!Onnoaccount！”criedPulcheriaAlexandrovna。“Andhowdareheofferhermoney！”
ThenRaskolnikovrepeated(ratherdrily)hisconversationwithSvidrigailov,omittinghisaccountoftheghostlyvisitationsofMarfaPetrovna,wishingtoavoidallunnecessarytalk。
“Whatanswerdidyougivehim？”askedDounia。
“AtfirstIsaidIwouldnottakeanymessagetoyou。Thenhesaidthathewoulddohisutmosttoobtainaninterviewwithyouwithoutmyhelp。Heassuredmethathispassionforyouwasapassinginfatuation,nowhehasnofeelingforyou。Hedoesn"twantyoutomarryLuzhin……Histalkwasaltogetherrathermuddled。“
“Howdoyouexplainhimtoyourself,Rodya?Howdidhestrikeyou？”
“ImustconfessIdon"tquiteunderstandhim。Heoffersyoutenthousand,andyetsaysheisnotwelloff。Hesaysheisgoingaway,andintenminutesheforgetshehassaidit。Thenhesaysishegoingtobemarriedandhasalreadyfixedonthegirl……Nodoubthehasamotive,andprobablyabadone。Butit"soddthatheshouldbesoclumsyaboutitifhehadanydesignsagainstyou……Ofcourse,I
refusedthismoneyonyouraccount,onceforall。Altogether,I
thoughthimverystrange……Onemightalmostthinkhewasmad。ButImaybemistaken;thatmayonlybethepartheassumes。ThedeathofMarfaPetrovnaseemstohavemadeagreatimpressiononhim。“
“Godresthersoul,“exclaimedPulcheriaAlexandrovna。“Ishallalways,alwaysprayforher!Whereshouldwebenow,Dounia,withoutthisthreethousand!It"sasthoughithadfallenfromheaven!Why,Rodya,thismorningwehadonlythreeroublesinourpocketandDouniaandIwerejustplanningtopawnherwatch,soastoavoidborrowingfromthatmanuntilheofferedhelp。“
DouniaseemedstrangelyimpressedbySvidrigailov"soffer。Shestillstoodmeditating。
“Hehasgotsometerribleplan,“shesaidinahalfwhispertoherself,almostshuddering。
Raskolnikovnoticedthisdisproportionateterror。
“IfancyIshallhavetoseehimmorethanonceagain,“hesaidtoDounia。
“Wewillwatchhim!Iwilltrackhimout！”criedRazumihin,vigorously。“Iwon"tlosesightofhim。Rodyahasgivenmeleave。Hesaidtomehimselfjustnow。"Takecareofmysister。"Willyougivemeleave,too,AvdotyaRomanovna？”
Douniasmiledandheldoutherhand,butthelookofanxietydidnotleaveherface。PulcheriaAlexandrovnagazedathertimidly,butthethreethousandroubleshadobviouslyasoothingeffectonher。
Aquarterofanhourlater,theywereallengagedinalivelyconversation。EvenRaskolnikovlistenedattentivelyforsometime,thoughhedidnottalk。Razumihinwasthespeaker。
“Andwhy,whyshouldyougoaway？”heflowedonecstatically。“Andwhatareyoutodoinalittletown?Thegreatthingis,youareallheretogetherandyouneedoneanother-youdoneedoneanother,believeme。Foratime,anyway……TakemeintopartnershipandI
assureyouwe"llplanacapitalenterprise。Listen!I"llexplainitallindetailtoyou,thewholeproject!Itallflashedintomyheadthismorning,beforeanythinghadhappened……Itellyouwhat;I
haveanuncle,Imustintroducehimtoyou(amostaccommodatingandrespectableoldman)。Thisunclehasgotacapitalofathousandroubles,andhelivesonhispensionandhasnoneedofthatmoney。
Forthelasttwoyearshehasbeenbotheringmetoborrowitfromhimandpayhimsixpercent。interest。Iknowwhatthatmeans;hesimplywantstohelpme。LastyearIhadnoneedofit,butthisyearIresolvedtoborrowitassoonashearrived。Thenyoulendmeanotherthousandofyourthreeandwehaveenoughforastart,sowe"llgointopartnership,andwhatarewegoingtodo？”
ThenRazumihinbegantounfoldhisproject,andheexplainedatlengththatalmostallourpublishersandbooksellersknownothingatallofwhattheyareselling,andforthatreasontheyareusuallybadpublishers,andthatanydecentpublicationspayasaruleandgiveaprofit,sometimesaconsiderableone。Razumihinhad,indeed,beendreamingofsettingupasapublisher。Forthelasttwoyearshehadbeenworkinginpublishers"offices,andknewthreeEuropeanlanguageswell,thoughhehadtoldRaskolnikovsixdaysbeforethathewas“schwach“inGermanwithanobjectofpersuadinghimtotakehalfhistranslationandhalfthepaymentforit。Hehadtoldalie,then,andRaskolnikovknewhewaslying。
“Why,whyshouldweletourchanceslipwhenwehaveoneofthechiefmeansofsuccess-moneyofourown！”criedRazumihinwarmly。“Ofcoursetherewillbealotofwork,butwewillwork,you,AvdotyaRomanovna,I,Rodion……Yougetasplendidprofitonsomebooksnowadays!Andthegreatpointofthebusinessisthatweshallknowjustwhatwantstranslating,andweshallbetranslating,publishing,learningallatonce。IcanbeofusebecauseIhaveexperience。FornearlytwoyearsI"vebeenscuttlingaboutamongthepublishers,andnowIknoweverydetailoftheirbusiness。Youneednotbeasainttomakepots,believeme!Andwhy,whyshouldweletourchanceslip!Why,Iknow-andIkeptthesecret-twoorthreebookswhichonemightgetahundredroublessimplyforthinkingoftranslatingandpublishing。Indeed,andIwouldnottakefivehundredfortheveryideaofoneofthem。Andwhatdoyouthink?IfIweretotellapublisher,Idaresayhe"dhesitate-theyaresuchblockheads!Andasforthebusinessside,printing,paper,selling,youtrusttome,Iknowmywayabout。We"llbegininasmallwayandgoontoalarge。Inanycaseitwillgetusourlivingandweshallgetbackourcapital。“
Dounia"seyesshone。
“Ilikewhatyouaresaying,DmitriProkofitch！”shesaid。
“Iknownothingaboutit,ofcourse,“putinPulcheriaAlexandrovna,“itmaybeagoodidea,butagainGodknows。It"snewanduntried。
Ofcourse,wemustremainhereatleastforatime。“ShelookedatRodya。
“Whatdoyouthink,brother？”saidDounia。
“Ithinkhe"sgotaverygoodidea,“heanswered。“Ofcourse,it"stoosoontodreamofapublishingfirm,butwecertainlymightbringoutfiveorsixbooksandbesureofsuccess。Iknowofonebookmyselfwhichwouldbesuretogowell。Andasforhisbeingabletomanageit,there"snodoubtaboutthateither。Heknowsthebusiness……Butwecantalkitoverlater……“
“Hurrah！”criedRazumihin。“Now,stay,there"saflathereinthishouse,belongingtothesameowner。It"saspecialflatapart,notcommunicatingwiththeselodgings。It"sfurnished,rentmoderate,threerooms。Supposeyoutakethemtobeginwith。I"llpawnyourwatchto-morrowandbringyouthemoney,andeverythingcanbearrangedthen。Youcanallthreelivetogether,andRodyawillbewithyou。Butwhereareyouoffto,Rodya？”
“What,Rodya,youaregoingalready？”PulcheriaAlexandrovnaaskedindismay。
“Atsuchaminute？”criedRazumihin。
Dounialookedatherbrotherwithincredulouswonder。Heheldhiscapinhishand,hewaspreparingtoleavethem。
“Onewouldthinkyouwereburyingmeorsayinggood-byeforever,“
hesaidsomewhatoddly。Heattemptedtosmile,butitdidnotturnoutasmile。“Butwhoknows,perhapsitisthelasttimeweshallseeeachother……“heletslipaccidentally。Itwaswhathewasthinking,anditsomehowwasutteredaloud。
“Whatisthematterwithyou？”criedhismother。
“Whereareyougoing,Rodya？”askedDouniaratherstrangely。
“Oh,I"mquiteobligedto……“heansweredvaguely,asthoughhesitatingwhathewouldsay。Buttherewasalookofsharpdeterminationinhiswhiteface。
“Imeanttosay……asIwascominghere……Imeanttotellyou,mother,andyou,Dounia,thatitwouldbebetterforustopartforatime。Ifeelill,Iamnotatpeace……Iwillcomeafterwards,I
willcomeofmyself……whenit"spossible,Irememberyouandloveyou……Leaveme,leavemealone。Idecidedthisevenbefore……I"mabsolutelyresolvedonit。Whatevermaycometome,whetherIcometoruinornot,Iwanttobealone。Forgetmealtogether,it"sbetter。
Don"tinquireaboutme。WhenIcan,I"llcomeofmyselfor……I"llsendforyou。Perhapsitwillallcomeback,butnowifyouloveme,givemeup……elseIshallbegintohateyou,Ifeelit……Good-bye！”
“GoodGod！”criedPulcheriaAlexandrovna。Bothhismotherandhissisterwereterriblyalarmed。Razumihinwasalso。
“Rodya,Rodya,bereconciledwithus!Letusbeasbefore！”criedhispoormother。
Heturnedslowlytothedoorandslowlywentoutoftheroom。Douniaovertookhim。
“Brother,whatareyoudoingtomother？”shewhispered,hereyesflashingwithindignation。
Helookeddullyather。
“Nomatter,Ishallcome……I"mcoming,“hemutteredinanundertone,asthoughnotfullyconsciousofwhathewassaying,andhewentoutoftheroom。
“Wicked,heartlessegoist！”criedDounia。
“Heisinsane,butnotheartless。Heismad!Don"tyouseeit?
You"reheartlessafterthat！”Razumihinwhisperedinherear,squeezingherhandtightly。“Ishallbebackdirectly,“heshoutedtothehorror-strickenmother,andheranoutoftheroom。
Raskolnikovwaswaitingforhimattheendofthepassage。
“Iknewyouwouldrunafterme,“hesaid。“Gobacktothem-bewiththem……bewiththemto-morrowandalways……I……perhapsI
shallcome……ifIcan。Good-bye。“
Andwithoutholdingouthishandhewalkedaway。
“Butwhereareyougoing?Whatareyoudoing?What"sthematterwithyou?Howcanyougoonlikethis？”Razumihinmuttered,athiswits"
end。
Raskolnikovstoppedoncemore。
“Onceforall,neveraskmeaboutanything。Ihavenothingtotellyou。Don"tcometoseeme。MaybeI"llcomehere……Leaveme,butdon"tleavethem。Doyouunderstandme？”
Itwasdarkinthecorridor,theywerestandingnearthelamp。Foraminutetheywerelookingatoneanotherinsilence。Razumihinrememberedthatminuteallhislife。Raskolnikov"sburningandintenteyesgrewmorepenetratingeverymoment,piercingintohissoul,intohisconsciousness。SuddenlyRazumihinstarted。Somethingstrange,asitwere,passedbetweenthem……Someidea,somehintasitwere,slipped,somethingawful,hideous,andsuddenlyunderstoodonbothsides……Razumihinturnedpale。
“Doyouunderstandnow？”saidRaskolnikov,hisfacetwitchingnervously。“Goback,gotothem,“hesaidsuddenly,andturningquickly,hewentoutofthehouse。
IwillnotattempttodescribehowRazumihinwentbacktotheladies,howhesoothedthem,howheprotestedthatRodyaneededrestinhisillness,protestedthatRodyawassuretocome,thathewouldcomeeveryday,thathewasvery,verymuchupset,thathemustnotbeirritated,thathe,Razumihin,wouldwatchoverhim,wouldgethimadoctor,thebestdoctor,aconsultation……InfactfromthateveningRazumihintookhisplacewiththemasasonandabrother。
ChapterFourRASKOLNIKOVWENTstraighttothehouseonthecanalbankwhereSonialived。Itwasanoldgreenhouseofthreestoreys。HefoundtheporterandobtainedfromhimvaguedirectionsastothewhereaboutsofKapernaumov,thetailor。Havingfoundinthecornerofthecourtyardtheentrancetothedarkandnarrowstaircase,hemountedtothesecondfloorandcameoutintoagallerythatranroundthewholesecondstoreyovertheyard。Whilehewaswanderinginthedarkness,uncertainwheretoturnforKapernaumov"sdoor,adooropenedthreepacesfromhim;hemechanicallytookholdofit。
“Whoisthere？”awoman"svoiceaskeduneasily。
“It"sI……cometoseeyou,“answeredRaskolnikovandhewalkedintothetinyentry。
Onabrokenchairstoodacandleinabatteredcoppercandlestick。
“It"syou!Goodheavens！”criedSoniaweaklyandshestoodrootedtothespot。
“Whichisyourroom?Thisway？”andRaskolnikov,tryingnottolookather,hastenedin。
AminutelaterSonia,too,cameinwiththecandle,setdownthecandlestickand,completelydisconcerted,stoodbeforehiminexpressiblyagitatedandapparentlyfrightenedbyhisunexpectedvisit。Thecolourrushedsuddenlytoherpalefaceandtearscameintohereyes……Shefeltsickandashamedandhappy,too……Raskolnikovturnedawayquicklyandsatonachairbythetable。Hescannedtheroominarapidglance。
Itwasalargebutexceedinglow-pitchedroom,theonlyoneletbytheKapernaumovs,towhoseroomsacloseddoorledinthewallontheleft。Intheoppositesideontherighthandwallwasanotherdoor,alwayskeptlocked。Thatledtothenextflat,whichformedaseparatelodging。Sonia"sroomlookedlikeabarn;itwasaveryirregularquadrangleandthisgaveitagrotesqueappearance。Awallwiththreewindowslookingoutontothecanalranaslantsothatonecornerformedaveryacuteangle,anditwasdifficulttoseeinitwithoutverystronglight。Theothercornerwasdisproportionatelyobtuse。Therewasscarcelyanyfurnitureinthebigroom：inthecornerontherightwasabedstead,besideit,nearestthedoor,achair。Aplain,dealtablecoveredbyablueclothstoodagainstthesamewall,closetothedoorintotheotherflat。Tworush-bottomchairsstoodbythetable。Ontheoppositewallneartheacuteanglestoodasmallplainwoodenchestofdrawerslooking,asitwere,lostinadesert。Thatwasalltherewasintheroom。Theyellow,scratchedandshabbywall-paperwasblackinthecorners。Itmusthavebeendampandfulloffumesinthewinter。Therewaseverysignofpoverty;eventhebedsteadhadnocurtain。
Sonialookedinsilenceathervisitor,whowassoattentivelyandunceremoniouslyscrutinisingherroom,andevenbeganatlasttotremblewithterror,asthoughshewasstandingbeforeherjudgeandthearbiterofherdestinies。
“Iamlate……eleven,isn"tit？”heasked,stillnotliftinghiseyes。
“Yes,“mutteredSonia,“oh,yes,itis,“sheadded,hastily,asthoughinthatlayhermeansofescape。“Mylandlady"sclockhasjuststruck……Ihearditmyself……“
“I"vecometoyouforthelasttime,“Raskolnikovwentongloomily,althoughthiswasthefirsttime。“Imayperhapsnotseeyouagain……“
“Areyou……goingaway？”
“Idon"tknow……to-morrow……“
“ThenyouarenotcomingtoKaterinaIvanovnato-morrow？”Sonia"svoiceshook。
“Idon"tknow。Ishallknowto-morrowmorning……Nevermindthat：
I"vecometosayoneword……“
Heraisedhisbroodingeyestoherandsuddenlynoticedthathewassittingdownwhileshewasallthewhilestandingbeforehim。
“Whyareyoustanding?Sitdown,“hesaidinachangedvoice,gentleandfriendly。
Shesatdown。Helookedkindlyandalmostcompassionatelyather。
“Howthinyouare!Whatahand!Quitetransparent,likeadeadhand。“
Hetookherhand。Soniasmiledfaintly。
“Ihavealwaysbeenlikethat,“shesaid。
“Evenwhenyoulivedathome？”
“Yes。“
“Ofcourse,youwere,“headdedabruptlyandtheexpressionofhisfaceandthesoundofhisvoicechangedagainsuddenly。
Helookedroundhimoncemore。
“YourentthisroomfromtheKapernaumovs？”
“Yes……“
“Theylivethere,throughthatdoor？”
“Yes……Theyhaveanotherroomlikethis。“
“Allinoneroom？”
“Yes。“
“Ishouldbeafraidinyourroomatnight,“heobservedgloomily。
“Theyareverygoodpeople,verykind,“answeredSonia,whostillseemedbewildered,“andallthefurniture,everything……everythingistheirs。Andtheyareverykindandthechildren,too,oftencometoseeme。“
“Theyallstammer,don"tthey？”
“Yes……Hestammersandhe"slame。Andhiswife,too……It"snotexactlythatshestammers,butshecan"tspeakplainly。Sheisaverykindwoman。Andheusedtobeahouseserf。Andtherearesevenchildren……andit"sonlytheeldestonethatstammersandtheothersaresimplyill……buttheydon"tstammer……Butwheredidyouhearaboutthem？”sheaddedwithsomesurprise。
“Yourfathertoldme,then。Hetoldmeallaboutyou……Andhowyouwentoutatsixo"clockandcamebackatnineandhowKaterinaIvanovnakneltdownbyyourbed。“
Soniawasconfused。
“IfanciedIsawhimto-day,“shewhisperedhesitatingly。
“Whom？”
“Father。Iwaswalkinginthestreet,outthereatthecorner,aboutteno"clockandheseemedtobewalkinginfront。Itlookedjustlikehim。IwantedtogotoKaterinaIvanovna……“
“Youwerewalkinginthestreets？”
“Yes,“Soniawhisperedabruptly,againovercomewithconfusionandlookingdown。
“KaterinaIvanovnausedtobeatyou,Idaresay？”
“Ohno,whatareyousaying?No！”Sonialookedathimalmostwithdismay。
“Youloveher,then？”
“Loveher?Ofcourse！”saidSoniawithplaintiveemphasis,andsheclaspedherhandsindistress。“Ah,youdon"t……Ifyouonlyknew!
Yousee,sheisquitelikeachild……Hermindisquiteunhinged,yousee……fromsorrow。Andhowcleversheusedtobe……howgenerous……
howkind!Ah,youdon"tunderstand,youdon"tunderstand！”
Soniasaidthisasthoughindespair,wringingherhandsinexcitementanddistress。Herpalecheeksflushed,therewasalookofanguishinhereyes。Itwasclearthatshewasstirredtotheverydepths,thatshewaslongingtospeak,tochampion,toexpresssomething。Asortofinsatiablecompassion,ifonemaysoexpressit,wasreflectedineveryfeatureofherface。
“Beatme!howcanyou?Goodheavens,beatme!Andifshedidbeatme,whatthen?Whatofit?Youknownothing,nothingaboutit……
Sheissounhappy……ah,howunhappy!Andill……Sheisseekingrighteousness,sheispure。Shehassuchfaiththattheremustberighteousnesseverywhereandsheexpectsit……Andifyouweretotortureher,shewouldn"tdowrong。Shedoesn"tseethatit"simpossibleforpeopletoberighteousandsheisangryatit。Likeachild,likeachild。Sheisgood！”
“Andwhatwillhappentoyou？”
Sonialookedathiminquiringly。
“Theyareleftonyourhands,yousee。Theywereallonyourhandsbefore,though……Andyourfathercametoyoutobegfordrink。Well,howwillitbenow？”
“Idon"tknow,“Soniaarticulatedmournfully。
“Willtheystaythere？”
“Idon"tknow……Theyareindebtforthelodging,butthelandlady,Ihear,saidto-daythatshewantedtogetridofthem,andKaterinaIvanovnasaysthatshewon"tstayanotherminute。“
“Howisitsheissobold?Shereliesuponyou？”
“Oh,no,don"ttalklikethat……Weareone,welivelikeone。“
Soniawasagitatedagainandevenangry,asthoughacanaryorsomeotherlittlebirdweretobeangry。“Andwhatcouldshedo?What,whatcouldshedo？”shepersisted,gettinghotandexcited。“Andhowshecriedto-day!Hermindisunhinged,haven"tyounoticedit?Atoneminutesheisworryinglikeachildthateverythingshouldberightto-morrow,thelunchandallthat……Thensheiswringingherhands,spittingblood,weeping,andallatonceshewillbeginknockingherheadagainstthewall,indespair。Thenshewillbecomfortedagain。Shebuildsallherhopesonyou;shesaysthatyouwillhelphernowandthatshewillborrowalittlemoneysomewhereandgotohernativetownwithmeandsetupaboardingschoolforthedaughtersofgentlemenandtakemetosuperintendit,andwewillbeginanewsplendidlife。Andshekissesandhugsme,comfortsme,andyouknowshehassuchfaith,suchfaithinherfancies!Onecan"tcontradicther。Andallthedaylongshehasbeenwashing,cleaning,mending。Shedraggedthewashtubintotheroomwithherfeeblehandsandsankonthebed,gaspingforbreath。WewentthismorningtotheshopstobuyshoesforPolenkaandLidafortheirsarequitewornout。Onlythemoneywe"dreckonedwasn"tenough,notnearlyenough。Andshepickedoutsuchdearlittleboots,forshehastaste,youdon"tknow。Andthereintheshopsheburstoutcryingbeforetheshopmenbecauseshehadn"tenough……Ah,itwassadtoseeher……“
“Well,afterthatIcanunderstandyourlivinglikethis,“
Raskolnikovsaidwithabittersmile。
“Andaren"tyousorryforthem?Aren"tyousorry？”Soniaflewathimagain。“Why,Iknow,yougaveyourlastpennyyourself,thoughyou"dseennothingofit,andifyou"dseeneverything,ohdear!Andhowoften,howoftenI"vebroughthertotears!Onlylastweek!Yes,I!
Onlyaweekbeforehisdeath。Iwascruel!AndhowoftenI"vedoneit!
Ah,I"vebeenwretchedatthethoughtofitallday！”
Soniawrungherhandsasshespokeatthepainofrememberingit。
“Youwerecruel？”
“Yes,I-I。Iwenttoseethem,“shewenton,weeping,“andfathersaid,"readmesomething,Sonia,myheadaches,readtome,here"sabook。"HehadabookhehadgotfromAndreySemyonovitchLebeziatnikov,helivesthere,healwaysusedtogetholdofsuchfunnybooks。AndIsaid,"Ican"tstay,"asIdidn"twanttoread,andI"dgoneinchieflytoshowKaterinaIvanovnasomecollars。