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The Thorn Birds(荆棘鸟)
投诉 阅读记录

第8章

"I’msorry,Luke。"

"I’msorry,too。Ididn’tmeantooffendyou。"

"Oh,no,youdidn’toffendme,truly!IsupposeI’mnotveryusedtoit……Iwasfrightened,notoffended。"

"Oh,Meghann!"Hetookonehandoffthewheelandputitoverherclaspedones。"Look,don’tworryaboutit。You’reabitofagirlandIwenttoofast。Let’sforgetit。

"Yes,let’s,"shesaid。

"Didn’thekissyou?"Lukeaskedcuriously。

"Who?"’

Wastherefearinhervoice?Butwhyshouldtherebefearinhervoice?"Yousaidyou’dbeeninloveonce,soIthoughtyouknewtheropes。I’msorry,Meghann。Ishouldhaverealizedthatstuckallthewayouthereinafamilylikeyours,whatyoumeantwasyouhadaschoolgirlcrushonsomeblokewhonevernoticedyou。"

Yes,yes,yes!Lethimthinkthat!"You’requiteright,Luke;itwasjustaschoolgirlcrush。"

Outsidethehousehedrewhertohimagainandgaveheragentle,lingeringkisswithoutanyopen-mouth,tonguebusiness。Shedidn’trespondexactly,butclearlyshelikedit;hewentofftohisguesthousemoresatisfiedthathehadn’truinedhischances。

Meggiedraggedherselftobedandlaylookingupatthesoftroundhalothelampcastontheceiling。Well,onethinghadbeenestablished:therewasnothinginLuke’skissestoremindherofRalph’s。Andonceortwicetowardtheendshehadfeltaflickerofdismayedexcitement,whenhehaddughisfingersintohersideand,whenhehadkissedherneck。NouseequatingLukewithRalph,andshewasn’tsureanymorethatshewantedtotry。BetterforgetRalph;hecouldn’tbeherhusband。Lukecould。

ThesecondtimeLukekissedherMeggiebehavedquitedifferently。TheyhadbeentoawonderfulpartyonRudnaHunish,thelimitoftheterritorialboundaryBobhaddrawnaroundtheirjaunts,andtheeveninghadgonewellfromitsbeginning。Lukewasinhisbestform,jokingsomuchonthewayouthekeptherhelplesswithlaughter,thenwarmlylovingandattentivetowardherallthroughtheparty。AndMissCarmichaelhadbeensodeterminedtotakehimawayfromher!SteppinginwhereAlastairMacQueenandEnochDaviesfearedtogo,sheattachedherselftothemandflirtedwithLukeblatantly,forcedhimforthesakeofgoodmannerstoaskhertodance。Itwasaformalaffair,thedancingballroomstyle,andthedanceLukegaveMissCarmichaelwasaslowwaltz。ButhehadcomebacktoMeggieimmediatelyitwasoverandsaidnothing,onlycasthiseyestowardtheceilinginawaywhichleftherinnodoubtthattohimMissCarmichaelwasabore。Andshelovedhimforit;eversincethedaytheladyhadinterferedwithherpleasureattheGillyShow,Meggiehaddislikedher。ShehadneverforgottenthewayFatherRalphhadignoredtheladytoliftasmallgirloverapuddle;nowtonightLukeshowedhimselfinthosesamecolors。Oh,bravo!Luke,you’resplendid!

Itwasaverylongwayhome,andverycold。LukehadcajoledapacketofsandwichesandabottleofchampagneoutofoldAngusMacQueen,andwhentheywerenearlytwo-thirdsofthewayhomehestoppedthecar。HeatersincarswereextremelyrareinAustraliathenasnow,buttheRollswasequippedwithaheater;thatnightitwasverywelcome,forthefrostlaytwoinchesthickontheground。

"Oh,isn’titnicetositwithoutacoatonanightlikethis?"Meggiesmiled,takingthelittlesilvercollapsiblecupofchampagneLukegaveher,andbitingintoahamsandwich。

"Yes,itis。Youlooksoprettytonight,Meghann。"

Whatwasitaboutthecolorofhereyes?Greywasn’tnormallyacolorhecaredfor,tooanemic,butlookingathergreyeyeshecouldhavesworntheyheldeverycolorintheblueendofthespectrum,violetandindigoandtheskyonarichclearday,deepmossygreen,ahintoftawnyyellow。Andtheyglowedlikesoft,half-opaquejewels,framedbythoselongcurlinglasheswhichglitteredasiftheyhadbeendippedingold。Hereachedoutanddelicatelybrushedhisfingeralongthelashesofoneeye,thensolemnlylookeddownatitstip。

"Why,Luke!What’sthematter?"

"Icouldn’tresistseeingformyselfthatyoudon’thaveapotofgoldpowderonyourdressingtable。Doyouknowyou’retheonlygirlI’veevermetwithrealgoldonhereyelashes?"

"Oh!"Shetouchedthemherself,lookedatherfinger,laughed。"SoIhave!Itdoesn’tcomeoffatall。"Thechampagnewasticklinghernoseandfizzinginherstomach;shefeltwonderful。

"Andrealgoldeyebrowsthathavethesameshapeasachurchroof,andthemostbeautifulrealgoldhair……Ialwaysexpectittobehardlikemetal,yetit’ssoftandfinelikeababy’s……Andskinyoumustusegoldpowderon,itshinesso……Andthemostbeautifulmouth,justmadeforkissing……"

Shesatstaringathimwiththattenderpinkmouthslightlyopen,thewayithadbeenontheirfirstmeeting;hereachedoutandtooktheemptycupfromher。

"Ithinkyouneedalittlemore。champagne,"hesaid,fillingit。"Imustadmitthisisnice,tostopandgiveourselvesalittlebreakfromthetrack。AndthankyouforthinkingofaskingMr。MacQueenforthesandwichesandwine。"

Thebig。Rollsenginetickedgentlyinthesilence,warmairpouringalmostsoundlesslythroughthevents;twoseparatekindsoflullingnoise。Lukeunknottedhistieandpulleditoff,openedhisshirtcollar。Theirjacketswereonthebackseat,toowarmforthecar。

"Oh,thatfeelsgood!Idon’tknowwhoinventedtiesandtheninsistedamanwasonlyproperlydressedwhenheworeone,butifeverImeethim,I’llstranglehimwithhisowninvention。"

Heturnedabruptly,loweredhisfacetohers,andseemedtocatchtheroundedcurveofherlipsexactlyintohis,liketwopiecesofajigsawpuzzle;thoughhedidn’tholdherortouchherelsewhereshefeltlockedtohimandletherheadfollowasheleanedback,drawingherforwardontohis。chest。Hishandscameuptoclaspherhead,thebettertoworkatthatdizzying,amazinglyresponsivemouth,drainit。Sighing,heabandonedhimselftofeelingnothingelse,athomeatlastwiththosesilkybaby’slipsfinallyfittinghisown。Herarmslidaroundhisneck,quiveringfingerssankintohishair,thepalmofherotherhandcomingtorestonthesmoothbrownskinatthebaseofhisthroat。Thistimehedidn’thurry,thoughhehadrisenandhardenedbeforegivingherthesecondcupofchampagne,justfromlookingather。Notreleasingherhead,hekissedhercheeks,herclosedeyes,thecurvingbonesoftheorbitsbeneathherbrows,camebacktohercheeksbecausetheyweresosatiny,camebacktohermouthbecauseitsinfantileshapedrovehimmad,haddrivenhimmadsincethedayhefirstsawher。

Andtherewasherthroat,thelittlehollowatitsbase,theskinofhershouldersodelicateandcoolanddry……Powerlesstocallahalt,almostbesidehimselfwithfearlestsheshouldcallahalt,heremovedonehandfromherheadandpluckedatthelongrowofbuttonsdownthebackofherdress,sliditoffherobedientarms,thenthestrapsofherloosesatinslip。Faceburiedbetweenherneckandshoulder,hepassedthetipsofhisfingersdownherbareback,feelingherstartledlittleshivers,thesuddenhardpointstoherbreasts。Hepushedhisfacelowerinablind,compulsivetouch-searchofonecold,cushionedsurface,lipsparted,pressingdown,untiltheyclosedovertautruchedflesh。Histonguelingeredforadazedminute,thenhishandsclutchedinagonizedpleasureonherbackandhesucked,nipped,kissed,sucked……Theoldeternalimpulse,hisparticularpreference,anditneverfailed。Itwassogood,good,good,goooooood!Hedidnotcryout,onlyshudderedforawrenching,drenchingmoment,andswallowedinthedepthsofhisthroat。

Likeasatiatednursling,heletthenipplepopoutofhismouth,formedakissofboundlessloveandgratitudeagainstthesideofherbreast,andlayutterlystillexceptfortheheavesofhisbreathing。Hecouldfeelhermouthinhishair,herhanddowninsidehisshirt,andsuddenlyheseemedtorecollecthimself,openedhiseyes。Brisklyhesatup,pulledherslipstrapsupherarms,thenherdress,andfastenedallthebuttonsdeftly。"You’dbettermarryme,Meghann,"hesaid,eyessoftandlaughing。"Idon’tthinkyourbrotherswouldapproveonelittlebitofwhatwejustdid。""Yes,IthinkI’dbettertoo,"sheagreed,lidslowered,adelicateflushinhercheeks。

"Let’stellthemtomorrowmorning。"

"Whynot?Thesoonerthebetter。"

"NextSaturdayI’lldriveyouintoGilly。We’llseeFatherThomas-Isupposeyou’dlikeachurchwedding-arrangeforthebanns,andbuyanengagementring。"

"Thankyou,Luke。"

Well,thatwasthat。Shehadcommittedherself,therecouldbenoturningback。Inafewweeksorhoweverlongittooktocallbanns,shewouldmarryLukeO’neill。Shewouldbe……Mrs。LukeO’neill!Howstrange!Whydidshesayyes?BecausehetoldmeImust,hesaidIwastodoit。Butwhy?Toremovehimfromdanger?Toprotecthimself,orme?RalphdeBricassart,sometimesIthinkIhateyou……

Theincidentinthecarhadbeenstartlinganddisturbing。Notabitlikethatfirsttime。Somanybeautiful,terrifyingsensations。Oh,thetouchofhishands!Thatelectrifyingtuggingatherbreastsendingvastwideningringsclearthroughher!Andhediditrightatthemomentherconsciencehadreareditshead,toldthemindlessthingsheseemedtohavebecomethathewastakingoffherclothes,thatshemustscream,slaphim,runaway。Nolongerlulledandhalfsenselessfromchampagne,fromwarmth,fromthediscoverythatitwasdelicioustobekissedwhenitwasdoneright,hisfirstgreatgulpingtaking-inofherbreasthadtransfixedher,stilledcommonsense,conscienceandallthoughtofflight。Hershoulderscameupoffhischest,herhipsseemedtosubsideagainsthim,herthighsandthatun-namedregionattheirtoprammedbyhissqueezinghandsagainstaridgeofhisbodyhardasarock,andshehadjustwantedtostaylikethatfortherestofherdays,shakentohersoulandyawningempty,wanting……Wantingwhat?Shedidn’tknow。Inthemomentatwhichhehadputherawayfromhimshehadn’twantedtogo,couldevenhaveflownathimlikeasavage。ButithadsetthesealonherhardeningresolvetomarryLukeO’neill。Nottomentionthatshewasconvincedhehaddonetoherthethingwhichmadebabiesstart。

Noonewasverysurprisedatthenews,andnoonedreamedofobjecting。TheonlythingwhichdidstartlethemwasMeggie’sadamantrefusaltowriteandtellBishopRalph,heralmosthystericalrejectionofBob’sideathattheyinviteBishopRalphtoDroghedaandhaveabighousewedding。No,no,no!Shehadscreameditatthem;Meggiewhoneverraisedhervoice。Apparentlyshewasmiffedthathehadnevercomebacktoseethem,maintainingthathermarriagewasherownbusiness,thatifhedidn’thavethecommondecencytocometoDroghedafornoreason,shewasnotgoingtofurnishhimwithanobligationhecouldnotrefuse。

SoFeepromisednottosayawordinherletters;sheseemednottocareonewayortheother,nordidsheseeminterestedinMeggie’schoiceofahusband。KeepingthebooksofastationaslargeasDroghedawasafull-timejob。Fee’srecordswouldhaveservedahistorianwithaperfectdescriptionoflifeonasheepstation,fortheydidn’tsimplyconsistoffiguresandledgers。Everymovementofeverymobofsheepwasrigidlydescribed,thechangesoftheseasons,theweathereachday,evenwhatMrs。Smithservedfordinner。TheentryinthelogbookforSunday,July22,1934,said:Skyclear,nocloud,temperatureatdawn34degrees。NoMasstoday。Bobin,JackoutatMurrimbahwith2stockmen,HughieoutatWestDamwith1stockman,Beerbarreldroving3-yearwethersfromBudgintoWinnemurra。Temperaturehighat3o’clock,85degrees。Barometersteady,30。6inches。Windduewest。Dinnermenucornedbeef,boiledpotatoes,carrotsandcabbage,thenplumduff。MeghannClearyistomarryMr。LukeO’neill,stockman,onSaturdayAugust25attheHolyCrossChurch,Gillanbone。Entered9o’clockevening,temperature45degrees,moonlastquarter。

LukeboughtMeggieadiamondengagementring,modestbutquitepretty,itstwinquarter-caratstonessetinapairofplatinumhearts。ThebannswerecalledfornoononSaturday,August25th,intheHolyCrossChurch。ThiswouldbefollowedbyafamilydinnerattheHotelImperial,towhichMrs。Smith,MinnieandCatwerenaturallyinvited,thoughJimsandPatsyhadbeenleftinSydneyafterMeggiesaidfirmlythatshecouldn’tseethepointinbringingthemsixhundredmilestowitnessaceremonytheydidn’treallyunderstand。Shehadreceivedtheirlettersofcongratulations;Jims’slong,ramblingandchildlike,Patsy’sconsistingofthreewords,"Lotsofluck。"TheyknewLuke,ofcourse,havingriddentheDroghedapaddockswithhimduringtheirvacations。

Mrs。SmithwasgrievedatMeggie’sinsistenceonassmallanaffairaspossible;shehadhopedtoseetheonlygirlmarriedonDroghedawithflagsflyingandcymbalsclashing,daysofcelebration。ButMeggiewassoagainstafusssheevenrefusedtowearbridalregalia;shewouldbemarriedinadaydressandanordinaryhat,whichcoulddoubleafterwardsashertravelingoutfit。

"Darling,I’vedecidedwheretotakeyouforourhoneymoon,"Lukesaid,slippingintoachairoppositeherstheSundayaftertheyhadmadetheirweddingplans。

"Where?"

"NorthQueensland。WhileyouwereatthedressmakerIgottalkingtosomechapsintheImperialbar,andtheyweretellingmethere’smoneytobemadeupincanecountry,ifaman’sstrongandnotafraidofhardwork。""ButLuke,youalreadyhaveagoodjobhere!""Amandoesn’tfeelright,batteningonhisin-laws。IwanttogetusthemoneytobuyaplaceoutinWesternQueensland,andIwantitbeforeI’mtoooldtoworkit。Amanwithnoeducationfindsithardtogethigh-payingworkinthisDepression,butthere’sashortageofmeninNorthQueensland,andthemoney’satleasttentimeswhatIearnasastockmanonDrogheda。""Doingwhat?"

"Cuttingsugarcane。"

"Cuttingsugarcane?That’scoolielabor"

"No,you’rewrong。Cooliesaren’tbigenoughtodoitaswellasthewhitecutters,andbesides,youknowaswellasIdothatAustralianlawforbidstheimportationofblackoryellowmentodoslavelabororworkforwageslowerthanawhiteman’s,takethebreadoutofawhiteAustralian’smouth。There’sashortageofcuttersandthemoney’sterrific。Nottoomanyblokesarebigenoughorstrongenoughtocutcane。But1am。Itwon’tbeatme!""Doesthismeanyou’rethinkingofmakingourhomeinNorthQueensland,Luke?"

"Yes。"

ShestaredpasthisshoulderthroughthegreatbankofwindowsatDrogheda:theghostgums,theHomePaddock,thestretchoftreesbeyond。Nottoliveon

Drogheda!TobesomewhereBishopRalphcouldneverfindher,tolivewithouteverseeinghimagain,tocleavetothisstrangersittingfacinghersoirrevocablytherecouldbenogoingback……ThegreyeyesrestedonLuke’svivid,impatientfaceandgrewmorebeautiful,butunmistakablysadder。Hesenseditonly;shehadnotearsthere,herlidsdidn’tdroop,orthecornersofhermouth。Buthewasn’tconcernedwithwhateversorrowsMeggieowned,forhehadnointentionoflettingherbecomesoimportanttohimshecausedhimworryonherbehalf。AdmittedlyshewassomethingofabonustoamanwhohadtriedtomarryDotMacPhersonofBingelly,butherphysicaldesirabilityandtractablenatureonlyincreasedLuke’sguardoverhisownheart。Nowoman,evenoneassweetandbeautifulasMeggieCleary,wasevergoingtogainsufficientpoweroverhimtotellhimwhattodo。

So,remainingtruetohimself,heplungedstraightintothemainthingonhismind。Thereweretimeswhenguilewasnecessary,butinthismatteritwouldn’tservehimaswellasbluntness。

"Meghann,I’manold-fashionedman,"hesaid。Shestaredathim,puzzled。"Areyou?"sheasked,hertoneimplying:Doesitmatter?

"Yes,"hesaid。"Ibelievethatwhenamanandwomanmarry,allthewoman’spropertyshouldbecometheman’s。Thewayadowrydidintheolddays。Iknowyou’vegotabitofmoney,andI’mtellingyounowthatwhenwemarryyou’retosignitovertome。It’sonlyfairyouknowwhat’sinmymindWhileyou’restillsingle,andabletodecidewhetheryouwanttodoit。"

IthadneveroccurredtoMeggiethatshewouldretainhermoney;shehadsimplyassumedwhenshemarrieditwouldbecomeLuke’s,nothers。AllsavethemosteducatedandsophisticatedAustralianwomenwererearedtothinkthemselvesmoreorlessthechattelsoftheirmen,andthiswasespeciallytrueofMeggie。DaddyhadalwaysruledFeeandhischildren,andsincehisdeathFeehaddeferredtoBobashissuccessor。Themanownedthemoney,thehouse,hiswifeandhischildren。Meggiehadneverquestionedhisrighttodoso。

"Oh!"sheexclaimed。"Ididn’tknowsigningany-thingwasnecessary,Luke。Ithoughtthatwhatwasmineautomaticallybecameyourswhenwemarried。"

"Itusedtobelikethat,butthosestupiddrongosinCanberrastoppeditwhentheygavewomenthevote。Iwanteverythingtobefairandsquarebetweenus,Meghann,soI’mtellingyounowhowthingsaregoingtobe。"Shelaughed,"It’sallright,Luke,Idon’tmind。"

Shetookitlikeagoodold-fashionedwife;Dotwouldn’thavegiveninsoreadily。"Howmuchhaveyougot?"heasked。

"Atthemoment,fourteenthousandpounds。EveryyearIgettwothousandmore。"

Hewhistled。"Fourteenthousandpounds!Phew!That’salotofmoney,Meghann。Bettertohavemelookafteritforyou。Wecanseethebankmanagernextweek,andremindmetomakesureeverythingcomingininthefuturegetsputinmyname,too。I’mnotgoingtotouchapennyofit,youknowthat。It’stobuyourstationlateron。Forthenextfewyearswe’rebothgoingtoworkhard,andsaveeverypennyweearn。Allright?"Shenodded。"Yes,Luke。"

AsimpleoversightonLuke’spartnearlyscotchedtheweddinginmidplan。HewasnotaCatholic。WhenFatherWattyfoundouthethrewuphishandsinhorror。

"DearLord,Luke,whydidn’tyoutellmeearlier?Indeedandtogoodness,itwilltakeallofourenergiestohaveyouconvertedandbaptizedbeforethewedding!"

LukestaredatFatherWatty,astonished。"Whosaidanythingaboutconverting,Father?I’mquitehappyasIambeingnothing,butifitworriesyou,writemedownasaCalathumpianoraHolyRollerorwhateveryoulike。ButwritemedownaCatholicyouwillnot。"

Invaintheypleaded;Lukerefusedtoentertain

ideaofconversionforamoment。"I’vegotnothingagainstCatholicismorEire,andIthinktheCatholicsinUlsterareharddoneby。ButI’mOrange,andI’mnotaturncoat。IfIwasaCatholicandyouwantedmetoconverttoMethodism,I’dreactthesame。It’sbeingaturncoatIobjectto,notbeingaCatholic。Soyou’llhavetodowithoutmeintheflock,Father,andthat’sthat。"

"Thenyoucan’tgetmarried!"

"Whyonearthnot?Ifyoudon’twanttomarryus,Ican’tseewhytheReverendupattheChurchofEnglandwillobject,orHarryGoughtheJ。P。"Feesmiledsourly,rememberinghercontretempswithPaddyandapriest;shehadwonthatencounter。

"But,Luke,Ihavetobemarriedinchurch!"Meggieprotestedfearfully。"IfI’mnot,I’llbelivinginsin!"

"Well,asfarasI’mconcerned,livinginsinisalotbetterthanturningmycoatinsideout,"saidLuke,whowassometimesacuriouscontradiction;muchashewantedMeggie’smoney,ablindstreakofstubbornnessinhimwouldn’tlethimbackdown。

"Oh,stopallthissilliness!"saidFee,nottoLukebuttothepriest。"DowhatPaddyandIdidandhaveanendtoargument!FatherThomascanmarryyouinthepresbyteryifhedoesn’twanttosoilhischurch!"Everyonestaredather,amazed,butitdidthetrick;FatherWatkingaveinandagreedtomarrytheminthepresbytery,thoughherefusedtoblessthering。

PartialChurchsanctionleftMeggiefeelingshewassinning,butnotbadlyenoughtogotoHell,andancientAnniethepresbyteryhousekeeperdidherbesttomakeFatherWatty’sstudyaschurchlikeaspossible,withgreatvasesofflowersandmanybrasscandlesticks。Butitwasanuncomfortableceremony,theverydispleasedpriestmakingeveryonefeelheonlywentthroughwithittosavehimselftheembarrassmentofasecularweddingelsewhere。NoNuptialMass,noblessings。

However,itwasdone。MeggiewasMrs。LukeO’neill,onherwaytoNorthQueenslandandahoneymoonsomewhatdelayedbythetimeitwouldtakegettingthere。LukerefusedtospendthatSaturdaynightattheImperial,forthebranch-linetraintoGoondiwindileftonlyonceaweek,onSaturdaynight,toconnectwiththeGoondiwindi-BrisbanemailtrainonSunday。ThiswouldbringthemtoBrisonMondayintimetocatchtheCairnsexpress。

TheGoondiwinditrainwascrowded。Theyhadnoprivacyandsatupallnightbecauseitcarriednosleepingcars。Hourafterhourittrundleditserratic,grumpywaynortheast,stoppinginterminablyeverytimetheenginedriverfeltlikebrewingabillyofteaforhimself,ortoletamobofsheepwanderalongtherails,ortohaveayarnwithadrover。"IwonderwhytheypronounceGoondiwindiGundiwindiiftheydon’twanttospellitthatway?"MeggieaskedidlyastheywaitedintheonlyplaceopeninGoondiwindionaSunday,theawfulinstitutional-greenstationwaitingroomwithitshardblackwoodenbenches。PoorMeggie,shewasnervousandillatease。

"HowdoIknow?"sighedLuke,whodidn’tfeelliketalkingandwasstarvingintothebargain。SinceitwasSundaytheycouldn’tevengetacupoftea;notuntiltheMonday-morningbreakfaststopontheBrisbanemaildidtheygetanopportunitytofilltheiremptystomachsandslaketheirthirst。ThenBrisbane,intoSouthBrisstation,thetrekacrossthecitytoRomaStreetStationandtheCairnstrain。HereMeggiediscoveredLukehadbookedthemtwosecond-classuprightseats。"Luke,we’renotshortofmoney!"shesaid,tiredandexasperated。"Ifyouforgottogotothebank,I’vegotahundredpoundsBobgavemehereinmypurse。Whydidn’tyougetusafirst-classsleepingcompartment?"Hestareddownather,astounded。"Butit’sonlythreenightsandthreedaystoDungloe!Whyspendmoneyonasleeperwhenwe’rebothyoung,healthyandstrong?Sittinguponatrainforawhilewon’tkillyou,Meghann!It’sabouttimeyourealizedyou’vemarriedaplainoldworkingman,notabloodysquatter!

SoMeggieslumpedinthewindowseatLukeseizedforherandrestedhertremblingchinonherhandtolookoutthewindowsoLukewouldn’tnoticehertears。Hehadspokentoherasonespeakstoanirresponsiblechild,andshewasbeginningtowonderifindeedthiswashowheregardedher。Rebellionbegantostir,butitwasverysmallandherfierceprideforbadetheindignityofquarreling。Insteadshetoldherselfshewasthismart’swife,butitwassuchanewthinghewasn’tusedtoit。Givehimtime。Theywouldlivetogether,shewouldcookhismeals,mendhisclothes,lookafterhim,havehisbabies,beagoodwifetohim。LookhowmuchDaddyhadappreciatedMum,howmuchhehadadoredher。GiveLuketime。

TheyweregoingtoatowncalledDungloe,onlyfiftymilesshortofCairns,whichwasthefarnorthernterminusofthelinewhichranallthewayalongtheQueenslandcoast。Overathousandmilesofnarrowthree-foot-six-gaugerail,rockingandpitchingbackandforth,everyseatinthecompartmentoccupied,nochancetoliedownorstretchout。ThoughitwasfarmoredenselysettledcountrysidethanGilly,andfarmorecolorful,shecouldn’tsummonupinterestinit。

Herheadached,shecouldkeepnofooddownandtheheatwasmuch,muchworsethananythingGillyhadevercookedup。Thelovelypinksilkweddingdresswasfilthyfromsootblowinginthewindows,herskinwasclammywithasweatwhichwouldn’tevaporate,andwhatwasmoregallingthananyofherphysicaldiscomforts,shewasclosetohatingLuke。Apparentlynotintheleasttiredoroutofsortsbecauseofthejourney,hesatathiseaseyarningwithtwomengoingtoCardwell。Theonlytimesheglancedinherdirectionhealsogotup,leanedacrosshersocarelesslysheshrank,andflungarolled-upnewspaperoutthewindowtosomeevent-hungrygangoftatteredmenbesidethelinewithsteelhammersintheirhands,calling:"Paip!Paip!"

"Fettlerslookingaftertherails,"heexplainedashesatdownagainthefirsttimeithappened。

Andheseemedtoassumeshewasquiteashappyandcomfortableashewas,thatthecoastalplainflyingbywasfascinatingher。Whileshesatstaringatitandnotseeingit,hatingitbeforeshehadsomuchassetfootonit。AtCardwellthetwomengotoff,andLukewenttothefish-and-chipshopacrosstheroadfromthestationtobringbackanewspaper-wrappedbundle。"TheysayCardwellfishhastobetastedtobebelieved,Meghannlove。Thebestfishintheworld。Here,trysome。It’syourfirstbitofgenuineBananalandfood。Itellyou,there’snoplacelikeQueensland。"Meggieglancedatthegreasypiecesofbatter-dippedfish,putherhandkerchieftohermouthandboltedforthetoilet。Hewaswaitinginthecorridorwhenshecameoutsometimelater,whiteandshaking。"What’sthematter?Aren’tyoufeelingwell?""Ihaven’tfeltwellsinceweleftGoondiwindi。"

"GoodLord!Whydidn’tyoutellme?"

"Whydidn’tyounotice?"

"Youlookedallrighttome。"

"Howfarisitnow?"sheasked,givingup。

"Threetosixhours,giveortakeabit。Theydon’truntotimetableupheretoomuch。There’splentyofroomnowthoseblokesaregone;liedownandputyourtootsiesinmylap。"

"Oh,don’tbaby-talkme!"shesnappedtartly。"Itwouldhavebeenalotbetterifthey’dgotofftwodaysagoinBundaberg!""Comeonnow,Meghann,beagoodsport!Nearlythere。OnlyTullyandInnisfail,thenDungloe。"

Itwaslateafternoonwhentheysteppedoffthetrain,

MeggieclingingdesperatelytoLuke’sarm,tooproudtoadmitshewasn’tabletowalkproperly。Heaskedthestationmasterforthenameofaworkingmen’shotel,pickeduptheircasesandwalkedoutontothestreet,Meggiebehindhimweavingdrunkenly。

"Onlytotheendoftheblockontheothersideofthestreet,"hecomforted。"Thewhitetwo-storiedjoint。"

ThoughtheirroomwassmallandfilledtooverflowingwithgreatpiecesofVictorianfurniture,itlookedlikeheaventoMeggie,collapsingontheedgeofthedoublebed。

"Liedownforawhilebeforedinner,love。I’mgoingouttofindmylandmarks,"hesaid,saunteringfromtheroomlookingasfreshandrestedashehadontheirweddingmorning。ThathadbeenSaturday,andthiswaslateThursdayafternoon;fivedayssittingupincrowdedtrains,chokedbycigarettesmokeandsoot。

Thebedwasrockingmonotonouslyintimetotheclickety-clickofsteelwheelspassingoverrailjoins,butMeggieturnedherheadintothepillowgratefully,andslept,andslept。

Someonehadtakenoffhershoesandstockings,andcoveredherwithasheet;Meggiestirred,openedhereyesandlookedaround。Lukewassittingonthewindowledgewithonekneedrawnup,smoking。Hermovementmadehimturntolookather,andhesmiled。

"Anicebrideyouare!HereIamlookingforwardtomyhoneymoonandmywifeconksoutfornearlytwodays!IwasabitworriedwhenIcouldn’twakeyouup,butthepublicansaysithitswomenlikethat,thetripupinthetrainandthehumidity。Hesaidjustletyousleepitoff。Howdoyoufeelnow?"

Shesatupstiffly,stretchedherarmsandyawned,"Ifeelmuchbetter,thankyou。Oh,Luke!IknowI’myoungandstrong,butI’mawoman!Ican’ttakethesortofphysicalpunishmentyoucan。"

Hecametositontheedgeofthebed,rubbingherarminarathercharminggestureofcontrition。"I’msorry,Meghann,Ireallyam。Ididn’tthinkofyourbeingawoman。Notusedtohavingawifewithme,that’sall。Areyouhungry,darling?"

"Starved。Doyourealizeit’salmostaweeksinceI’veeaten?""Thenwhydon’tyouhaveabath,putonacleandressandcomeoutsidetolookatDungloe?"

TherewasaChinesecafenextdoortothehotel,whereLukeledMeggieforherfirst-evertasteofOrientalfood。Shewassohungryanythingwouldhavetastedgood,butthiswassuperb。Nordidshecareifitwasmadeofrats"tailsandsharks’finsandfowls’bowels,asrumorhaditinGillanbone,whichonlypossessedacaferunbyGreekswhoservedsteakandchips。Lukehadbrown-baggedtwoquartbottlesofbeerfromthehotelandinsistedshedrinkaglassinspiteofherdislikeforbeer。"Goeasyonthewateratfirst,"headvised。"Beerwon’tgiveyouthetrots。"

ThenhetookherarmandwalkedheraroundDungloeproudly,asifheownedit。Butthen,LukewasbornaQueenslander。WhataplaceDungloewas!Ithadalookandacharacterfarremovedfromwesterntowns。InsizeitwasprobablythesameasGilly,butinsteadoframblingforeverdownonemainstreet。Dungloewasbuiltinorderedsquareblocks,andallitsshopsandhouseswerepaintedwhite,notbrown。Windowswereverticalwoodentransoms,presumablytocatchthebreeze,andwhereverpossibleroofshadbeendispensedwith,likethemovietheater,whichhadascreen,transomedwallsandrowsofship’scanvasdeskchairs,butnoroofatall。Allaroundtheedgeofthetownencroachedagenuinejungle。Vinesandcreeperssprawledeverywhereupposts,acrossroofs,alongwalls。Treessproutedcasuallyinthemiddleoftheroad,orhadhousesbuiltaroundthem,orperhapshadgrownupthroughthehouses。Itwasimpossibletotellwhichhadcomefirst,treesorhumanhabitations,fortheoverwhelmingimpressionwasoneofuncontrolled,hecticgrowthofvegetation。CoconutpalmstallerandstraighterthantheDroghedaghostgumswavedfrondsagainstadeep,swimmingbluesky;everywhereMeggielookedwasablazeofcolor。Nobrown-and-greyland,this。Everykindoftreeseemedtobeinflower-purple,orange,scarlet,pink,blue,white。ThereweremanyChineseinblacksilktrousers,tinyblack-and-whiteshoeswithwhitesocks,whiteMandarin-collaredshirts,pigtailsdowntheirbacks。MalesandfemaleslookedsoalikeMeggiefounditdifficulttotellwhichwerewhich。AlmosttheentirecommerceofthetownseemedtobeinthehandsofChinese;alargedepartmentstore,farmoreopulentthananythingGillypossessed,boreaChinesename:AHWONG’S,saidthesign。Allthehouseswerebuiltontopofveryhighpiles,liketheoldheadstockman’sresidenceonDrogheda。Thiswastoachievemaximumaircirculation,Lukeexplained,andkeepthetermitesfromcausingthemtofalldownayearaftertheywerebuilt。Atthetopofeachpilewasatinplatewithturned-downedges;termitescouldn’tbendtheirbodiesinthemiddleandthuscouldn’tcrawloverthetinparapetintothewoodofthehouseitself。Ofcoursetheyfeastedonthepiles,butwhenapilerotteditwasremovedandreplacedbyanewone。Mucheasierandlessexpensivethanputtingupanewhouse。Mostofthegardensseemedtobejungle,bambooandpalms,asiftheinhabitantshadgivenuptryingtokeepfloralorder。Themenandwomenshockedher。TogofordinnerandawalkwithLukeshehaddressedascustomdemandedinheeledshoes,silkstockings,satinslip,floatingsilkfrockwithbeltandelbowsleeves。Onherheadwasabigstrawhat,onherhandsweregloves。Andwhatirritatedherthemostwasanuncomfortablefeelingfromthewaypeoplestaredthatshewastheoneimproperlydressed!Themenwerebare-footed,bare-leggedandmostlybare-chested,wearingnothingbutdrabkhakishorts;thefewwhocoveredtheirchestsdidsowithathleticsinglets,notshirts。Thewomenwereworse。Afewworeskimpycottondressesclearlyminusanythinginthewayofunderwear,nostockings,sloppysandals。Butthemajorityworeshortshorts,wentbare-footedandshieldedtheirbreastswithindecentlittlesleevelessvests。Dungloewasacivilizedtown,notabeach。Butherewereitsnativewhiteinhabitantsstrollingaroundinbrazenundress;theChinesewerebetterclad。Therewerebicycleseverywhere,hundredsofthem;afewcars,nohorsesatall。Yes,verydifferentfromGilly。Anditwashot,hot,hot。Theypassedathermometerwhichincrediblysaidamereninetydegrees;inGillyat115degreesitseemedcoolerthanthis。Meggiefeltasifshemovedthroughsolidairwhichherbodyhadtocutlikewet,steamybutter,asifwhenshebreathedherlungsfilledwithwater。

"Luke,Ican’tbearit!Please,canwegoback?"shegaspedafterlessthanamile。

"Ifyouwant。You’refeelingthehumidity。Itrarelygetsbelowninetypercent,winterorsummer,andthetemperaturerarelygetsbeloweighty-fiveoraboveninety-five。There’snotmuchofaseasonalvariation,butinsummerthemonsoonssendthehumidityuptoahundredpercentalltheflamingtime。""Summerrain,notwinter?"

"Allyearround。Themonsoonsalwayscome,andwhenthey’renotblowing,thesoutheasttradesare。Theycarryalotofrain,too。Dungloehasanannualrainfallofbetweenoneandthreehundredinches。"

Threehundredinchesofrainayear!PoorGillyecstaticifitgotaprincelyfifteen,whilehereasmuchasthreehundredfell,twothousandmilesfromGilly。

"Doesn’titcooloffatnight?"Meggieaskedastheyreachedthehotel;hotnightsinGillywerebearablecomparedtothissteambath。

"Notverymuch。You’llgetusedtoit。"Heopenedthedoortotheirroomandstoodbackforhertoenter。"I’mgoingdowntothebarforabeer,butI’llbebackinhalfanhour。Thatoughttogiveyouenoughtime。"Hereyesflewtohisface,startled。"Yes,Luke。"

Dungloewasseventeendegreessouthoftheequator,sonightfelllikeathunderclap;oneminuteitseemedthesunwasscarcelysetting,andthenextminutepitch-blackdarknessspreaditselfthickandwarmliketreacle。WhenLukecamebackMeggiehadswitchedoffthelightandwaslyinginthebedwiththesheetpulleduptoherchin。Laughing,hereachedoutandtuggeditoffher,threwitonthefloor。

"It’shotenough,love!Wewon’tneedasheet。"

Shecouldhearhimwalkingabout,seehisfaintshadowsheddingitsclothes。"Iputyourpajamasonthedressingtable,"shewhispered。"Pajamas?Inweatherlikethis?IknowinGillythey’dhaveastrokeatthethoughtofamannotwearingpajamas,butthisisDungloe!Areyoureallywearinganightie?"

"Yes。"

"Thentakeitoff。Thebloodythingwillonlybeanuisanceanyway。"Fumbling,MeggiemanagedtowriggleoutofthelawnnightgownMrs。Smithhadembroideredsolovinglyforherweddingnight,thankfulthatitwastoodarkforhimtoseeher。Hewasright;itwasmuchcoolerlyingbareandlettingthebreezefromthewide-opentransomsplayoverherthinly。Butthethoughtofanotherhotbodyinthebedwithherwasdepressing。Thespringscreaked;Meggiefeltdampskintouchherarmandjumped。Heturnedonhisside,pulledherintohisarmsandkissedher。Atfirstshelaypassively,tryingnottothinkofthatwide-openmouthanditsprobing,indecenttongue,butthenshebegantostruggletobefree,notwantingtobecloseintheheat,notwantingtobekissed,notwantingLuke。Itwasn’tabitlikethatnightintheRollscomingbackfromRudnaHunish。Shecouldn’tseemtofeelanythinginhimwhichthoughtofher,andsomepartofhimwaspushinginsistentlyatherthighswhileonehand,itsnailssquarelysharp,dugintoherbuttocks。Herfearblossomedintoterror,shewasoverwhelmedinmorethanaphysicalwaybyhisstrengthanddetermination,hislackofawarenessofher。Suddenlyhelethergo,satupandseemedtofumblewithhimself,snappingandpullingatsomething……"Betterbesafe,"hegasped。"Lieonyourback,it’stime。No,notlikethat!Open-yourlegs,forGod’ssake!Don’tyouknowanything?"No,no,Luke,Idon’t!shewantedtocry。Thisishorrible,obscene;whateveritisyou’redoingtomecan’tpossiblybepermittedbythelawsofChurchormen!Heactuallylaydownontopofher,liftedhishipsandpokedatherwithonehand,theothersofirmlyinherhairshedidn’tdaremove。Twitchingandjumpingatthealienthingbetweenherlegs,shetriedtodoashewanted,spreadherlegswider,buthewasmuchbroaderthanshewas,andhergroinmuscleswentintocrampyspasmfromtheweightofhimandtheun-accustomedposture。Eventhroughthedarkeningmistsoffrightandexhaustionshecouldsensethegatheringofsomemightypower;asheenteredheralonghighscreamleftherlips。

"Shutup!"hegroaned,tookhishandoutofherhairandclampeditdefensivelyoverhermouth。"Whatdoyouwanttodo,makeeveryoneinthisbloodypubthinkI’mmurderingyou?Liestillanditwon’thurtanymorethanithasto!Liestill,liestill!"

Shefoughtlikeonepossessedtoberidofthatghastly,painfulthing,buthisweightpinnedherdownandhishanddeadenedhercries,theagonywentonandon。Utterlydrybecausehehadn’trousedher,theevendriercondomscrapedandraspedhertissuesasheworkedhimselfinandout,fasterandfaster,thebreathbeginningtohissbetweenhisteeth;thensomechangestilledhim,madehimshudder,swallowhard。Thepaindulledtorawsorenessandhemercifullyrolledoffhertolieonhisback,gasping。"It’llbebetterforyouthenexttime,"hemanagedtosay。"Thefirsttimealwayshurtsthewoman。"

Thenwhydidn’tyouhavethedecencytotellmethatbeforehand?shewantedtosnarl,butshehadn’ttheenergytoutterthewords,shewastoobusywantingtodie。Notonlybecauseofthepain,butalsofromthediscoverythatshehadpossessednoidentityforhim,onlybeenaninstrument。Thesecondtimehurtjustasmuch,andthethird;exasperated,expectingherdiscomfort(forsohedeemedit)todisappearmagicallyafterthefirsttimeandthusnotunderstandingwhyshecontinuedtofightandcryout,Lukegrewangry,turnedhisbackonherandwenttosleep。ThetearsslippedsidewaysfromMeggie’seyesintoherhair;shelayonherbackwishingfordeath,orelseforheroldlifeonDrogheda。

WasthatwhatFatherRalphhadmeantyearsago,whenhehadtoldherofthehiddenpassagewaytodowithhavingchildren?Anicewaytofindoutwhathemeant。Nowonderhehadpreferrednottoexplainitmoreclearlyhimself。YetLukehadlikedtheactivitywellenoughtodoitthreetimesinquicksuccession。Obviouslyitdidn’thurthim。Andforthatshefoundherselfhatinghim,hatingit。

Exhausted,sosoremovingwasagony,MeggieinchedherselfoverontohersidewithherbacktoLuke,andweptintothepillow。Sleepeludedher,thoughLukesleptsosoundlyhersmalltimidmovementsnevercausedsomuchasachangeinthepatternofhisbreathing。Hewasaneconomicalsleeperandaquietone,heneithersnorednorfloppedabout,andshethoughtwhilewaitingforthelatedawnthatifithadjustbeenamatteroflyingdowntogether,shemighthavefoundhimnicetobewith。Andthedawncame,asquicklyandjoylesslyasdarknesshad;itseemedstrangenottohearroosterscrowing,theothersoundsofarousingDroghedawithitssheepandhorsesandpigsanddogs。

Lukewoke,androlledover,shefelthimkissherontheshoulderandwassotired,sohomesickthatsheforgotmodesty,didn’tcareaboutcoveringherself。

"Comeon,Meghann,let’shavealookatyou,"hecommanded,hishandonherhip。"Turnover,likeagoodlittlegirl。"

Nothingmatteredthismorning;Meggieturnedover,wincing,andlaylookingupathimdully。"Idon’tlikeMeghann,"shesaid,theonlyformofprotestshecouldmanage。"Idowishyou’dcallmeMeggie。"

"Idon’tlikeMeggie。ButifyoureallydislikeMeghannsomuch,I’llcallyouMeg。"Hisgazerovedherbodydreamily。"Whataniceshapeyou’vegot。"Hetouchedonebreast,pinknippleflatandunaroused。"Especiallythese。"Bunchingthepillowsintoaheap,helaybackonthemandsmiled。"Comeon,Meg,kissme。It’syourturntomakelovetome,andmaybeyou’lllikethatbetter,eh?"

IneverwanttokissyouagainaslongasIlive,shethought,lookingatthelong,heavilymuscledbody,thematofdarkhaironthechestdivingdownthebellyinathinlineandthenflaringintoabush,outofwhichgrewthedeceptivelysmallandinnocentshootwhichcouldcausesomuchpain。Howhairyhislegswere!Meggiehadgrownupwithmenwhoneverremovedalayeroftheirclothesinthepresenceofwomen,butopen-neckedshirtsshowedhairychestsinhotweather。Theywereallfairmen,andnotoffensivetoher;thisdarkmanwasalien,repulsive。Ralphhadaheadofhairjustasdark,butwellsherememberedthatsmooth,hairlessbrownchest。"Doasyou’retold,Meg!Kissme。"

Leaningover,shekissedhim;hecuppedherbreastsinhispalmsandmadehergoonkissinghim,tookoneofherhandsandpusheditdowntohisgroin。Startled,shetookherunwillingmouthawayfromhistolookatwhatlayunderherhand,changingandgrowing。"Oh,please,Luke,notagain!"shecried。"Please,notagain!Please,please!"

Theblueeyesscannedherspeculatively。"Hurtsthatmuch?Allright,we’lldosomethingdifferent,butforGod’ssaketrytobeenthusiastic!"Pullingherontopofhim,hepushedherlegsapart,liftedhershouldersandattachedhimselftoherbreast,ashehaddoneinthecarthenightshecommittedherselftomarryinghim。Thereonlyinbody,Meggieenduredit;atleasthedidn’tputhimselfinsideher,soitdidn’thurtanymorethansimplymovingdid。Whatstrangecreaturesmenwere,togoatthisasifitwasthemostpleasurablethingintheworld。Itwasdisgusting,amockeryoflove。Haditnotbeenforherhopethatitwouldculminateinababy,Meggiewouldhaverefusedflatlytohaveanythingmoretodowithit。

"I’vegotyouajob,"Lukesaidoverbreakfastinthehoteldiningroom。"What?BeforeI’vehadachancetomakeourhomenice,Luke?Beforewe’veevengotahome?"

"There’snopointinourrentingahouse,Meg。I’mgoingtocutcane;it’sallarranged。ThebestgangofcuttersinQueenslandisagangofSwedes,PolesandIrishledbyablokecalledArneSwenson,andwhileyouweresleepingoffthejourneyIwenttoseehim。He’samanshortandhe’swillingtogivemeatrial。ThatmeansI’llbelivinginbarrackswiththem。Wecutsixdaysaweek,sunrisetosunset。Notonlythat,butwemovearoundupanddownthecoast,whereverthenextjobtakesus。HowmuchIearndependsonhowmuchsugarIcut,andifI’mgoodenoughtocutwithArne’sgangI’llbepullinginmorethantwentyquidaweek。Twentyquidaweek!Canyouimaginethat?"

"Areyoutryingtotellmewewon’tbelivingtogether,Luke?""Wecan’t,Meg!Themenwon’thaveawomaninthebarracks,andwhat’stheuseofyourlivingaloneinahouse?Youmayaswellwork,too;it’sallmoneytowardourstation。"

"ButwherewillIlive?WhatsortofworkcanIdo?There’snostocktodroveuphere。"

"No,more’sthepity。That’swhyI’vegotyoualive-injob,Meg。You’llgetfreeboard,Iwon’thavetheexpenseofkeepingyou。You’regoingtoworkasahousemaidonHimmelhoch,LudwigMueller’splace。He’sthebiggestcanecockyinthedistrictandhiswife’saninvalid,can’tmanagethehouseonherown。I’lltakeyoutheretomorrowmorning。"

"ButwhenwillIseeyou,Luke?"

"OnSundays。Luddieunderstandsyou’remarried;hedoesn’tmindifyoudisappearonSundays"

"Well!You’vecertainlyarrangedthingstoyoursatisfaction,haven’tyou?""Ireckon。Oh,Meg,we’regoingtoberich!We’llworkhardandsaveeverypenny,anditwon’tbelongbeforewecanbuyourselvesthebeststationinWesternQueensland。There’sthefourteenthousandI’vegotintheGillybank,thetwothousandayearmorecominginthere,andthethirteenhundredormoreayearwecanearnbetweenus。Itwon’tbelong,love,Ipromise。Grinandbearitforme,eh?Whybecontentwitharentedhousewhentheharderweworknowmeansthesooneryou’llbelookingaroundyourownkitchen?""Ifit’swhatyouwant。"Shelookeddownatherpurse。"Luke,didyoutakemyhundredpounds?"

"Iputitinthebank。Youcan’tcarrymoneylikethataround,Meg。

"Butyoutookeverybitofit!Idon’thaveapenny!Whataboutspendingmoney?"

"Whyonearthdoyouwantspendingmoney?You’llbeoutatHimmelhochinthemorning,andyoucan’tspendanythingthere。I’lltakecareofthehotelbill。It’stimeyourealizedyou’vemarriedaworkingman,Meg,thatyou’renotthepamperedsquatter’sdaughterwithmoneytoburn。Muellerwillpayyourwagesstraightintomybankaccount,wherethey’llstayalongwithmine。I’mnotspendingthemoneyonmyself,Meg,youknowthat。Neitherofusisgoingtotouchit,becauseit’sforourfuture,ourstation。"

"Yes,Iunderstand。You’reverysensible,Luke。ButwhatifIshouldhaveababy?"

Foramomenthewastemptedtotellherthetruth,thattherewouldbenobabyuntilthestationwasareality,butsomethinginherfacemadehimdecidenotto。

"Well,let’scrossthatbridgewhenwecometoit,eh?I’dratherwedidn’thaveoneuntilwe’vegotourstation,solet’sjusthopewedon’t。"Nohome,nomoney,nobabies。Nohusband,forthatmatter。Meggiestartedtolaugh。Lukejoinedher,histeacupliftedinatoast。"Here’stoFrenchletters,"hesaid。

InthemorningtheywentouttoHimmelhochonthelocalbus,anoldFordwithnoglassinitswindowsandroomfortwelvepeople。Meggiewasfeelingbetter,forLukehadleftheralonewhensheofferedhimabreast,andseemedtolikeitquiteaswellasthatotherawfulthing。Muchandallasshewantedbabies,hercouragehadfailedher。ThefirstSundaythatshewasn’tsoreatall,shetoldherself,shewouldbewillingtotryagain。Perhapstherewasababyalreadyontheway,andsheneedn’tbotherwithiteveragainunlessshewantedmore。Eyesbrighter,shelookedaroundherwithinterestasthebuschuggedoutalongthereddirtroad。Itwasbreath-takingcountry,sodifferentfromGilly;shehadtoadmittherewasagrandeurandbeautyhereGillyquitelacked。Easytoseetherewasneverashortageofwater。Thesoilwasthecoloroffreshlyspilledblood,brilliantscarlet,andthecaneinthefieldsnotfallowwasaperfectcontrasttothesoil:longbrightgreenbladeswavingfifteenortwentyfeetaboveclaret-coloredstalksasthickasLuke’sarm。Nowhereintheworld,ravedLuke,didcanegrowastallorasrichinsugar;itsyieldwasthehighestknown。Thatbright-redsoilwasoverahundredfeetdeep,andsostuffedwithexactlytherightnutrientsthecanecouldn’thelpbutbeperfect,especiallyconsideringtherainfall。Andnowhereelseintheworldwasitcutbywhitemen,atthewhiteman’sdriving,money-hungrypace。"Youlookgoodonasoapbox,Luke,"saidMeggieironically。Heglancedsidewaysather,suspiciously,butrefrainedfromcommentbecausethebushadstoppedonthesideoftheroadtoletthemoff。Himmelhochwasalargewhitehouseontopofahill,surroundedbycoconutpalms,bananapalmsandbeautifulsmallerpalmswhoseleavessplayedoutwardingreatfanslikethetailsofpeacocks。Agroveofbamboofortyfeethighcutthehouseofffromtheworstofthenorthwestmonsoonalwinds;evenwithitshillelevationitwasstillmountedontopoffifteen-footpiles。Lukecarriedhercase;Meggietoileduptheredroadbesidehim,gasping,stillincorrectshoesandstockings,herhatwiltingaroundherface。Thecanebaronhimselfwasn’tin,buthiswifecameontotheverandaastheymountedthesteps,balancingherselfbetweentwosticks。Shewassmiling;lookingatherdearkindface,Meggiefeltbetteratonce。"Comein,comein!"shesaidinastrongAustralianaccent。ExpectingaGermanvoice,Meggiewasimmeasurablycheered。Lukeputhercasedown,shookhandswhentheladytookherrightoneoffitsstick,thenpoundedawaydownthestepsinahurrytocatchthebusonitsreturnjourney。ArneSwensonwaspickinghimupoutsidethepubatteno’clock。"What’syourfirstname,Mrs。O’neill?"

"Meggie。"

"Oh,that’snice。MineisAnne,andI’dratheryoucalledmeAnne。It’sbeensolonelyupheresincemygirlleftmeamonthago,butit’snoteasytogetgoodhousehelp,soI’vebeenbattlingonmyown。There’sonlyLuddieandmetolookafter;wehavenochildren。Ihopeyou’regoingtolikelivingwithus,Meggie。"

"I’msureIwill,Mrs。Mueller-Anne。"

"Letmeshowyoutoyourroom。Canyoumanagethecase?I’mnotmuchgoodatcarryingthings,I’mafraid。"

Theroomwasausterelyfurnished,liketherestofthehouse,butitlookedoutontheonlysideofthehousewheretheviewwasunimpededbysomesortofwindbreak,andsharedthesamestretchofverandaasthelivingroom,whichseemedverybaretoMeggiewithitscanefurnitureandlackoffabric。"It’sjusttoohotuphereforvelvetorchintz,"Anneexplained。"Welivewithwicker,andaslittleonourselvesasdecencyallows。I’llhavetoeducateyou,oryou’lldie。You’rehopelesslyoverclothed。"

Sheherselfwasinasleeveless,low-neckedvestandapairofshortshorts,outofwhichherpoortwistedlegspokeddoddering。InnotimeatallMeggiefoundherselfsimilarlyclad,loanedfromAnneuntilLukecouldbepersuadedtobuyhernewclothes。Itwashumiliatingtohavetoexplainthatshewasallowednomoney,butatleasthavingtoendurethisattenuatedherembarrassmentoverwearingsolittle。

"Well,youcertainlydecoratemyshortsbetterthanIdo,"saidAnne。Shewentonwithherbreezylecture。"Luddiewillbringyoufirewood;you’renottocutyourownordragitupthesteps。IwishwehadelectricityliketheplacescloserintoDunny,butthegovernmentisslowerthanawetweek。MaybenextyearthelinewillreachasfarasHimmelhoch,butuntilthenit’stheawfuloldfuelstove,I’mafraid。Butyouwait,Meggie!

Theminutetheygiveuspowerwe’llhaveanelectricstove,electriclightsandarefrigerator。"

"I’musedtodoingwithoutthem。"

"Yes,butwhereyoucomefromtheheatisdry。Thisisfar,farworse。I’mjustfrightenedthatyourhealthwillsuffer。Itoftendoesinwomenwhoweren’tbornandbroughtuphere;somethingtodowiththeblood。We’reonthesamelatitudesouthasBombayandRangoonarenorth,youknow;notfitcountryformanorbeastunlessborntoit。"Shesmiled。"Oh,it’snicehavingyoualready!YouandIaregoingtohaveawonderfultime!Doyoulikereading?LuddieandIhaveapassionforit。"

Meggie’sfacelitup。"Oh,yes!"

"Splendid!You’llbetoocontenttomissthatbighandsomehusbandofyours。"

Meggiedidn’tanswer。MissLuke?Washehandsome?Shethoughtthatifsheneversawhimagainshewouldbeperfectlyhappy。Exceptthathewasherhusband,thatthelawsaidshehadtomakeherlifewithhim。Shehadgoneintoitwithhereyesopen;shehadnoonetoblamesaveherself。AndperhapsasthemoneycameinandthestationinWesternQueenslandbecameareality,therewouldbetimeforLukeandhertolivetogether,settledown,knoweachother,getalong。

Hewasn’tabadman,orunlikable;itwasjustthathehadbeenalonesolonghedidn’tknowhowtosharehimselfwithsomeoneelse。Andhewasasimpleman,ruthlesslysingleofpurpose,untormented。Whathedesiredwasaconcretething,evenifadream;itwasapositiverewardwhichwouldsurelycomeastheresultofunremittingwork,grindingsacrifice。Forthatonehadtorespecthim。Notforamomentdidshethinkhewouldusethemoneytogivehimselfluxuries;hehadmeantwhathesaid;Itwouldstayinthebank。Thetroublewashedidn’thavethetimeortheinclinationtounderstandawoman,hedidn’tseemtoknowawomanwasdifferent,neededthingshedidn’tneed,asheneededthingsshedidn’t。Well,itcouldbeworse。HemighthaveputhertoworkforsomeonefarcolderandlessconsideratethanAnneMueller。Ontopofthishillshewouldn’tcometoanyharm。Butoh,itwassofarfromDrogheda!

Thatlastthoughtcameagainaftertheyfinishedtouringthehouse,andstoodtogetheronthelivingroomverandalookingoutacrossHimmelhoch。Thegreatfieldsofcane(onecouldn’tcallthempaddocks,sincetheyweresmallenoughtoencompasswiththeeyes)plumedlushlyinthewind,arestlesslysparklingandpolished-by-raingreen,fallingawayinalongslopetothejungle-cladbanksofagreatriver,widerbyfarthantheBarwon。Beyondtheriverthecanelandsroseagain,squaresofpoisonousgreeninterspersedwithbloodyfallowfields,untilatthefootofavastmountainthecultivationstopped,andthejungletookover。Behindtheconeofmountain,fartheraway,otherpeaksrearedanddiedpurpleintothedistance。Theskywasaricher,denserbluethanGillyskies,puffedwithwhitebillowsofthickcloud,andthecolorofthewholewasvivid,intense。

"That’sMountBartleFrere,"saidAnne,pointingtotheisolatedpeak。"Sixthousandfeetstraightupoutofasea-levelplain。Theysayit’ssolidtin,butthere’snohopeofminingitforthejungle。"

Ontheheavy,idlewindcameastrong,sickeningstenchMeggiehadn’tstoppedtryingtogetoutofhernostrilssincesteppingoffthetrain。Likedecay,onlynotlikedecay;unbearablysweet,all-pervasive,atangiblepresencewhichneverseemedtodiminishnomatterhowhardthebreezeblew。"Whatyoucansmellismolasses,"saidAnneasshenoticedMeggie’sflaringnose;shelitatailor-madeArdathcigarette。

"It’sdisgusting。"

"Iknow。That’swhyIsmoke。Buttoacertainextentyougetusedtoit,thoughunlikemostsmellsitneverquitedisappears。Dayinanddayout,themolassesisalwaysthere。""Whatarethebuildingsontheriverwiththeblackchimney?""That’sthemill。Itprocessesthecaneintorawsugar。What’sleftover,thedryremnantsofthecaneminusitssugarcontent,iscalledbagasse。BothrawsugarandbagassearesentsouthtoSydneyforfurtherrefining。Outofrawsugartheygetmolasses,treacle,goldensyrup,brownsugar,whitesugarandliquidglucose。ThebagasseismadeintofibrousbuildingboardlikeMasonite。Nothingiswasted,absolutelynothing。That’swhyeveninthisDepressiongrowingcaneisstillaveryprofitablebusiness。"

ArneSwensonwassixfeettwoinchestall,exactlyLuke’sheight,andjustashandsome。Hisbarebodywascoatedadarkgoldenbrownbyperpetualexposuretothesun,histhatchofbrightyellowhaircurledalloverhishead;thefineSwedishfeaturesweresolikeLuke’sintypethatitwaseasytoseehowmuchNorsebloodhadpercolatedintotheveinsoftheScotsandIrish。

Lukehadabandonedhismoleskinsandwhiteshirtinfavorofshorts。WithArneheclimbedintoanancient,wheezingmodel-TutilitytruckandheadedforwherethegangwascuttingoutbyGoondi。Thesecondhandbicyclehehadboughtlayintheutility’strayalongwithhiscase,andhewasdyingtobeginwork。

Theothermenhadbeencuttingsincedawnanddidn’tlifttheirheadswhenArneappearedfromthedirectionofthebarracks,Lukeintow。Thecuttinguniformconsistedofshorts,bootswiththickwoolensocks,andcanvashats。Eyesnarrowing,Lukestaredatthetoilingmen,whowereapeculiarsight。Coal-blackdirtcoveredthemfromheadtofoot,withsweatmakingbrightpinkstreaksdownchests,arms,backs。

"Sootandmuckfromthecane,"Arneexplained。"Wehavetoburnitbeforewecancutit。"

Hebentdowntopickuptwoinstruments,gaveonetoLukeandkeptone。"Thisisacaneknife,"hesaid,heftinghis。"Withthisyoucutthecane。Veryeasyifyouknowhow。"Hegrinned,proceedingtodemonstrateandmakingitlookfareasierthanitprobablywas。

Lukelookedatthedeadlythinghegripped,whichwasnotatalllikeaWestIndianmachete。Itwidenedintoalargetriangleinsteadoftaperingtoapoint,andhadawickedhooklikearooster’sspuratoneofthetwobladeends。

"AmacheteistoosmallforNorthQueenslandcane,"Arnesaid,finishedhisdemonstration。"Thisistherighttoy,you’llfind。Keepitsharp,andgoodluck。"

Offhewenttohisownsection,leavingLukestandingundecidedforamoment。Then,shrugging,hestartedwork。Withinminutesheunderstoodwhytheyleftittoslavesandtoracesnotsophisticatedenoughtoknowtherewereeasierwaystomakealiving;likeshearing,hethoughtwithwryhumor。Bend,hack,straighten,clutchtheunwieldytop-heavybunchsecurely,slideitslengththroughthehands,whackofftheleaves,dropitinatidyheap,gotothenextclusterof-stems,bend,hack,straighten,hack,addittotheheap……

Thecanewasalivewithvermin:rats,bandicoots,cockroaches,toads,spiders,snakes,wasps,fliesandbees。Everythingthatcouldbiteviciouslyorstingunbearablywaswellrepresented。Forthatreasonthecuttersburnedthecanefirst,preferringthefilthofworkingcharredcropstothedepredationsofgreen,livingcane。Evensotheywerestung,bittenandcut。Ifithadn’tbeenforthebootsLuke’sfeetwouldhavebeenworseoffthanhishands,butnocuttereverworegloves。Theyslowedamandown,andtimewasmoneyinthisgame。Besides,glovesweresissy。AtsundownArnecalledahalt,andcametoseehowLukehadfared。

"Hey,matenotbad!"heshouted,thumpingLukeontheback。"Fivetons;notbadforafirstday!"

Itwasnotalongwalkbacktothebarracks,buttropicalnightfellsosuddenlyitwasdarkastheyarrived。Beforegoinginsidetheycollectednakedinacommunalshower,then,towelsaroundtheirwaists,theytroopedintothebarracks,wherewhichevercutteroncookdutythatweekhadmountainsofwhateverwashisspecialtyreadyonthetable。Todayitwassteakandpotatoes,damperbreadandjamroly-poly;themenfellonitandwolfedeverylastparticledown,ravenous。

Tworowsofironpalletsfacedeachotherdowneithersideofalongroommadeofcorrugatediron;sighingandcursingthecanewithanoriginalityabullockymighthaveenvied,themenfloppednakedontopofunbleachedsheets,drewtheirmosquitonetsdownfromtheringsandwithinmomentswereasleep,vagueshapesundergauzytents。

ArnedetainedLuke。"Letmeseeyourhands。"Heinspectedthebleedingcuts,theblisters,thestings。"Bluebagthemfirst,thenusethisointment。Andifyoutakemyadviceyou’llrubcoconutoilintothemeverynightofyourlife。You’vegotbighands,soifyourbackcantakeityou’llmakeagoodcutter。Inaweekyou’llharden,youwon’tbesosore。"

EverymuscleinLuke’ssplendidbodyhaditsownseparateache;hewasconscious。ofnothingbutavast,crucifyingpain。Handswrappedandanointed,hestretchedhimselfonhisallottedbed,pulleddownhismosquitonetandclosedhiseyesonaworldoflittlesuffocatingholes。HadhedreamedwhathewasinforhewouldneverhavewastedhisessenceonMeggie;shehadbecomeawithered,unwantedandunwelcomeideainthebackofhismind,shelved。Heknewhewouldneverhaveanythingforherwhilehecutthecane。Ittookhimthepredictedweektoharden,andattaintheeight-ton-a-dayminimumArnedemandedofhisgangmembers。ThenhesettleddowntobecomingbetterthanArne。Hewantedthebiggestshareofthemoney,maybeapartnership。ButmostofallhewantedtoseethatsamelookthatcameintoeveryfaceforArnedirectedathimself;Arnewassomethingofagod,forhewasthebestcutterinQueensland,andthatprobablymeanthewasthebestmeatcutterintheworld。WhentheywentintoatownonSaturdaynightthelocalmencouldn’tbuyArneenoughrumsandbeers,andthelocalwomenwhirredabouthimlikehummingbirds。ThereweremanysimilaritiesbetweenArneandLuke。Theywerebothvainandenjoyedevokingintensefemaleadmiration,butadmirationwasasfarasitwent。Theyhadnothingtogivetowomen;theygaveitalltothecane。

ForLuketheworkhadabeautyandapainheseemedtohavebeenwaitingallhislifetofeel。Tobendandstraightenandbendinthatritualrhythmwastoparticipateinsomemysterybeyondthescopeofordinarymen。For,aswatchingArnetaughthim,todothissuperblywastobeatopmemberofthemostelitebandofworkingmenintheworld;hecouldbearhimselfwithpridenomatterwherehewas,knowingthatalmosteverymanhemetwouldneverlastadayinacanefield。TheKingofEnglandwasnobetterthanhe,andtheKingofEnglandwouldadmirehimifheknewhim。Hecouldlookwithpityandcontemptondoctors,lawyers,pen-pushers,cockies。Tocutsugarthemoney-hungrywhiteman’sway-thatwasthegreatestachievement。Hewouldsitontheedgeofhiscotfeelingtheribbed,cordedmusclesofhisarmswell,lookatthehorny,scarredpalmsofhishands,thetannedlengthofhisbeautifullystructuredlegs,andsmile。Amanwhocoulddothisandnotonlysurvivebutlikeitwasaman。HewonderediftheKingofEnglandcouldsayasmuch。

ItwasfourweeksbeforeMeggiesawLuke。EachSundayshepowderedherstickynose,putonaprettysilkdress-thoughshegaveupthepurgatoryofslipsandstockings-andwaitedforherhusband,whonevercame。AnneandLuddieMuellersaidnothing,justwatchedheranimationfadeaseachSundaydarkeneddramatically,likeacurtainfallingonabrilliantlylit,emptystage。Itwasn’tthatshewantedhim,precisely;itwasjustthathewashers,orshewashis,orhoweverbestitmightbedescribed。Toimaginethathedidn’teventhinkofherwhileshepassedherdaysandweekswaitingwithhiminherthoughtsallthetime,toimaginethatwastobefilledwithrage,frustration,bitterness,humiliation,sorrow。MuchasshehadloathedthosetwonightsattheDunnypub,atleastthenshehadcomefirstwithhim;nowshefoundherselfactuallywishingshehadbittenoffhertonguesoonerthancriedoutinpain。Thatwasit,ofcourse。Hersufferinghadmadehimtireofher,ruinedhisownpleasure。Fromangerathim,athisindifferencetoherpain,shepassedtoremorse,andendedinblamingitallonherself。ThefourthSundayshedidn’tbotherdressingup,justpaddedaroundthekitchenbare-footedinshortsandvest,gettingahotbreakfastforLuddieandAnne,whoenjoyedthisincongruityonceaweek。Atthesoundoffootstepsonthebackstairssheturnedfrombaconsizzlinginthepan;foramomentshesimplystaredatthebig,hairyfellowinthedoorway。Luke?WasthisLuke?Heseemedmadeofrock,inhuman。Buttheeffigycrossedthekitchen,gaveherasmackingkissandsatdownatthetable。Shebrokeeggsintothepanandputonmorebacon。

AnneMuellercamein,smiledcivillyandinwardlyfumedathim。Wretchedman,whatwasheabout,toleavehisnewwifeneglectedforsolong?"I’mgladtoseeyou’verememberedyouhaveawife,"shesaid。"Comeoutontotheveranda,sitwithLuddieandmeandwe’llallhavebreakfast。Luke,helpMeggiecarrythebaconandeggs。Icanmanagethetoastrackinmyteeth。"

LudwigMuellerwasAustralian-born,buthisGermanheritagewasclearlyonhim:thebeefyredcomplexionnotabletocopewithbeerandsuncombined,thesquaregreyhead,thepale-blueBalticeyes。HeandhiswifelikedMeggieverymuch,andcountedthemselvesfortunatetohaveacquiredherservices。EspeciallywasLuddiegrateful,seeinghowmuchhappierAnnewassincethatgoldyheadhadbeenglowingaroundthehouse。

"How’sthecutting,Luke?"heasked,shovelingeggsandbaconontohisplate。

"IfIsaidIlikedit,wouldyoubelieveme?"Lukelaughed,heapinghisownplate。

Luddie’sshrewdeyesrestedonthehandsomeface,andhenodded。"Oh,yes。You’vegottherightsortoftemperamentandtherightsortofbody,Ithink。Itmakesyoufeelbetterthanothermen,superiortothem。"Caughtinhisheritageofcanefields,farfromacademiaandwithnochanceofexchangingonefortheother,Luddiewasanardentstudentofhumannature;hereadgreatfattomesboundinMoroccoleatherwithnamesontheirspineslikeFreudandJung,HuxleyandRussell。

"IwasbeginningtothinkyouwerenevergoingtocomeandseeMeggie,"Annesaid,spreadinggheeonhertoastwithabrush;itwastheonlywaytheycouldhavebutteruphere,butitwasbetterthannone。"Well,ArneandIdecidedtoworkonSundaysforawhile。Tomorrowwe’reofftoIngham。"

"WhichmeanspoorMeggiewon’tseeyoutoooften。"

"Megunderstands。Itwon’tbeformorethanacoupleofyears,andwedohavethesummerlayoff。ArnesayshecangetmeworkattheCSRinSydneythen,andImighttakeMegwithme。"

"Whydoyouhavetoworksohard,Luke?"askedAnne。"Gottogetthemoneytogetherformypropertyoutwest,aroundKynuna。Didn’tMegmentionit?"

"I’mafraidourMeggie’snotmuchgoodatpersonaltalk。Youtellus,Luke。"

Thethreelistenerssatwatchingtheplayofexpressiononthetanned,strongface,theglitterofthoseveryblueeyes;sincehehadcomebeforebreakfastMeggiehadn’tutteredawordtoanyone。OnandonhetalkedaboutthemarvelouscountryBackofBeyond;thegrass,thebiggreybrolgabirdsmincingdelicatelyinthedustofKynuna’sonlyroad,thethousandsuponthousandsofflyingkangaroos,thehotdrysun。"Andonedaysoonabigchunkofallthatisgoingtobemine。Meg’sputabitofmoneytowardit,andatthepacewe’reworkingitwon’ttakemorethanfourorfiveyears。Sooner,ifIwascontenttohaveapoorerplace,butknowingwhatIcanearncuttingsugar,I’mtemptedtocutabitlongerandgetareallydecentbitofland。"Heleanedforward,bigscarredhandsaroundhisteacup。"DoyouknowInearlypassedAme’stallytheotherday?EleventonsIcutinoneday!"

Luddie’swhistlewasgenuinelyadmiring,andtheyembarkeduponadiscussionoftallies。Meggiesippedherstrongdarkmilklesstea。Oh,Luke!Firstithadbeenacoupleofyears,nowitwasfourorfive,andwhoknewhowlongitwouldbethenexttimehementionedaperiodofyears?Lukelovedit,noonecouldmistakethat。Sowouldhegiveitupwhenthetimecame?Wouldhe?Forthatmatter,didshewanttowaitaroundtofindout?TheMuellerswereverykindandshewasfarfromoverworked,butifshehadtolivewithoutahusband,Droghedawasthebestplace。InthemonthofherstayatHimmelhochshehadn’tfeltreallywellforonesingleday;shedidn’twanttoeat,shesufferedboutsofpainfuldiarrhea,sheseemeddoggedbylethargyandcouldn’tshakeitoff。Notusedtofeelinganythingbuttiptopwell,thevaguemalaisefrightenedher。

AfterbreakfastLukehelpedherwashthedishes,thentookherforawalkdowntothenearestcanefield,talkingallthetimeaboutthesugarandwhatitwasliketocutit,whatabeautlifeitwasoutintheopenair,whatabeautlotofblokestheywereinAme’sgang,howdifferentitwasfromshearing,andhowmuchbetter。

Theyturnedandwalkedupthehillagain;Lukeledherintotheexquisitelycoolcavernunderthehouse,betweenthepiles。Annehadmadeaconservatoryoutofit,stoodpiecesofterra-cottapipeofdifferinglengthsandgirthsupright,thenfilledthemwithsoilandplantedtrailing,danglingthingsinthem;orchidsofeverykindandcolor,ferns,exoticcreepersandbushes。Thegroundwassoftandredolentofwoodchips;greatwirebasketshungfromthejoistsoverhead,fulloffernsororchidsortuberoses;staghornsinbarknestsgrewonthepiles;magnificentbegoniasindozensofbrilliantcolorshadbeenplantedaroundthebasesofthepipes。ItwasMeggie’sfavoriteretreat,theonethingofHimmelhoch’sshepreferredtoanythingofDrogheda’s。ForDroghedacouldneverhopetogrowsomuchononesmallspot;therejustwasn’tenoughmoistureintheair。

"Isn’tthislovely,Luke?Doyouthinkperhapsafteracoupleofyearsupherewemightbeabletorentahouseformetolivein?I’mdyingtotrysomethinglikethisformyself。"

"Whatonearthdoyouwanttolivealoneinahousefor?Thisisn’tGilly,Meg;it’sthesortofplacewhereawomanonherownisn’tsafe。You’remuchbetteroffhere,believeme。Aren’tyouhappyhere?""I’mashappyasonecanbeinsomeoneelse’shome。"

"Look,Meg,you’vejustgottobecontentwithwhatyouhavenowuntilwemoveoutwest。Wecan’tspendmoneyrentinghousesandhavingyoulivealifeofleisureandstillsave。Doyouhearme?"

"Yes,Luke。"

Hewassoupsethedidn’tdowhathehadintendedtodowhenheledherunderthehouse,namelykissher。Insteadhegaveheracasualsmackonthebottomwhichhurtalittletoomuchtobecasual,andsetoffdowntheroadtothespotwherehehadlefthisbikeproppedagainstatree。Hehadpedaledtwentymilestoseeherratherthanspendmoneyonarailmotorandabus,whichmeanthehadtopedaltwentymilesback。

"Thepoorlittlesoul!"saidAnnetoLuddie。"Icouldkillhim!"

Januarycameandwent,theslackestmonthoftheyearforcanecutters,buttherewasnosignofLuke。HehadmurmuredabouttakingMeggietoSydney,butinsteadhewenttoSydneywithArneandwithouther。ArnewasabachelorandhadanauntwithahouseinRozelle,withinwalkingdistance(notramfares;savemoney)oftheCSR,theColonialSugarRefineries。Withinthosegargantuanconcretewallslikeafortressonahill,acutterwithconnectionscouldgetwork。LukeandArnekeptintrimstackingsugarbags,andswimmingorsurfingintheirsparetime。

LeftinDungloewiththeMuellers,MeggiesweatedherwaythroughTheWet,asthemonsoonseasonwascalled。TheDrylastedfromMarchtoNovemberandinthispartofthecontinentwasn’texactlydry,butcomparedtoTheWetitwasheavenly。DuringTheWettheskiesjustopenedandvomitedwater,notalldaybutinfitsandstarts;inbetweendelugesthelandsteamed,greatcloudsofwhitevaporrisingfromthecane,thesoil,thejungle,themountains。

AndastimewentonMeggielongedforhomemoreandmore。NorthQueensland,sheknewnow,couldneverbecomehometoher。Foronething,theclimatedidn’tsuither,perhapsbecauseshehadspentmostofherlifeindryness。And,shehatedtheloneliness,theunfriendliness,thefeelingofremorselesslethargy。Shehatedtheprolificinsectandreptilelifewhichmadeeachnightanordealofgianttoads,tarantulas,cockroaches,rats;nothingseemedtokeepthemoutofthehouse,andshewasterrifiedofthem。Theyweresohuge,soaggressive,sohungry。Mostofallshehatedthedunny,whichwasnotonlythelocalpatoisfortoiletbutthediminutiveforDungloe,muchtothedelightofthelocalpopulace,whopunnedonitperpetually。ButaDunnydunnyleftone’sstomachchurninginrevolt,forinthisseethingclimateholesinthegroundwereoutofthequestionbecauseoftyphoidandotherentericfevers。Insteadofbeingaholeintheground,aDunnydunnywasatarredtincanwhichstank,andasitfilledcamealivewithnoisomemaggotsandworms。Onceaweekthecanwasremovedandreplacedwithanemptyone,butonceaweekwasn’tsoonenough。

Meggie’swholespiritrebelledagainstthecasuallocalacceptanceofsuchthingsasnormal;alifetimeinNorthQueenslandcouldn’treconcilehertothem。Yetdismallyshereflectedthatitprobablywouldbeawholelifetime,oratleastuntilLukewastoooldtocutthesugar。MuchasshelongedforanddreamedofDrogheda,shewasfartooproudtoadmittoherfamilythatherhusbandneglectedher;soonerthanadmitthat,she’dtakethelifetimesentence,shetoldherselffiercely。

Monthswentby,thenayear,andtimecrepttowardthesecondyear’send。OnlytheconstantkindnessoftheMuellerskeptMeggieinresidenceatHimmelhoch,tryingtoresolveherdilemma。HadshewrittentoaskBobforthefarehomehewouldhavesentitbyreturntelegram,butpoorMeggiecouldn’tfacetellingherfamilythatLukekeptherwithoutapennyinherpurse。ThedayshedidtellthemwasthedayshewouldleaveLuke,nevertogobacktohim,andshehadn’tmadeuphermindyettotakesuchastep。EverythinginherupbringingconspiredtopreventherleavingLuke:thesacrednessofhermarriagevows,thehopeshemighthaveababyoneday,thepositionLukeoccupiedashusbandandmasterofherdestiny。Thentherewerethethingswhichsprangfromherownnature:thatstubborn,stiff-neckedpride,andthenigglingconvictionthatthesituationwasasmuchherfaultasLuke’s。Iftherewasn’tsomethingwrongwithher,Lukemighthavebehavedfardifferently。Shehadseenhimsixtimesintheeighteenmonthsofherexile,andoftenthought,quiteunawaresuchathingashomosexualityexisted,thatbyrightsLukeshouldhavemarriedArne,becausehecertainlylivedwithArneandmuchpreferredhiscompany。Theyhadgoneintofullpartnershipanddriftedupanddownthethousand-milecoastfollowingthesugarharvest,living,itseemed,onlytowork。WhenLukedidcometoseeherhedidn’tattemptanykindofintimacy,justsataroundforanhourortwoyarningtoLuddieandAnne,tookhiswifeforawalk,gaveherafriendlykiss,andwasoffagain。Thethreeofthem,Luddie,AnneandMeggie,spentalltheirsparetimereading。HimmelhochhadalibraryfarlargerthanDrogheda’sfewshelves,moreeruditeandmoresalaciousbyfar,andMeggielearnedagreatdealwhilesheread。

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