第11章

Thegreyeyesdidn’tchange，butinthenewgrowthofhersoulMeggieunderstood。Mumwasglad；shejustdidn’tknowhowtoshowit。"HaveyouleftLuke？"Feeasked，takingitforgrantedthatMrs。Smithandthemaidswereasentitledtoknowasshewasherself。"Yes。Ishallnevergobacktohim。Hedidn’twantahome，orhischildren，orme。"

"Children？"

"Yes。I’mgoingtohaveanotherbaby。"

Oohsandaahsfromtheservants，andFeespeakingherjudgmentinthatmeasuredvoice，gladnessunderneath。

"Ifhedoesn’twantyou，thenyouwererighttocomehome。Wecanlookafteryouhere。"

Heroldroom，lookingoutacrosstheHomePaddock，thegardens。AndaroomnextdoorforJustine，thenewbabywhenitcame。Oh，itwassogoodtobehome！

Bobwasgladtoseeher，too。MoreandmorelikePaddy，hewasbecomingalittlebentandsinewyasthesunbakedhisskinandhisbonestodryness。Hehadthesamegentlestrengthofcharacter，butperhapsbecausehehadneverbeentheprogenitorofalargefamily，helackedPaddy’sfatherlymien。AndhewaslikeFee，also。Quiet，self-contained，notonetoairhisfeelingsoropinions。Hehadtobeintohismiddlethirties，Meggiethoughtinsuddensurprise，andstillhewasn’tmarried。ThenJackandHughiecamein，twoduplicateBobswithouthisauthority，theirshysmileswelcomingherhome。Thatmustbeit，shereflected；theyaresoshy，itistheland，forthelanddoesn’tneedarticulatenessorsocialgraces。Itneedsonlywhattheybringtoit，voice-lessloveandwholeheartedfealty。

TheClearymenwereallhomethatnight，tounloadatruckofcornJimsandPatsyhadpickedupfromtheAMLANDFinGilly。

"I’veneverseenitsodry，Meggie，"Bobsaid。"Norainintwoyears，notadrop。Andthebunniesareabiggercursethanthekangas；they’reeatingmoregrassthansheepandkangascombined。We’regoingtotrytohand-feed，butyouknowwhatsheepare。"

OnlytoowelldidMeggieknowwhatsheepwere。Idiots，incapableofunderstandingeventherudimentsofsurvival。Whatlittlebraintheoriginalanimalhadeverpossessedwasentirelybredoutofthesewoollyaristocrats。Sheepwouldn’teatanythingbutgrass，orscrubcutfromtheirnaturalenvironment。Buttherejustweren’tenoughhandstocutscrubtosatisfyoverahundredthousandsheep。

"Itakeityoucanuseme？"sheasked。

"Canwe！You’llfreeupaman’shandsforscrubcutting，Meggie，ifyou’llridetheinsidepaddocksthewayyouusedto。"

Trueastheirword，thetwinswerehomeforgood。AtfourteentheyquitRiverviewforever，couldn’theadbacktotheblack-oilplainsquicklyenough。AlreadytheylookedlikejuvenileBobs，JacksandHughies，inwhatwasgraduallyreplacingtheold-fashionedgreytwillandflannelastheuniformoftheGreatNorthwestgrazier:whitemoleskinbreeches，whiteshirt，aflat-crownedgreyfelthatwithabroadbrim，andankle-highelastic-sidedridingbootswithflatheels。Onlythehandfulofhalf-casteaborigineswholivedinGilly’sshantysectionapedthecowboysoftheAmericanWest，inhigh-heeledfancybootsandten-gallonStetsons。Toablack-soilplainsmansuchgearwasauselessaffectation，apartofadifferentculture。Amancouldn’twalkthroughthescrubinhigh-heeledboots，andamanoftenhadtowalkthroughthescrub。Andaten-gallonStetsonwasfartoohotandheavy。Thechestnutmareandtheblackgeldingwerebothdead；thestableswereempty。Meggieinsistedshewashappywithastockhorse，butBobwentovertoMartinKing’stobuyhertwoofhispart-thoroughbredhackscomacreamymarewithablackmaneandtail，andaleggychestnutgelding。ForsomereasonthelossoftheoldchestnutmarehitMeggieharderthanheractualpartingfromRalph，adelayedreaction；asifinthisthefactofhisgoingwasmoreclearlystated。Butitwassogoodtobeoutinthepaddocksagain，toridewiththedogs，eatthedustofableatingmobofsheep，watchthebirds，thesky，theland。

Itwasterriblydry。Drogheda’sgrasshadalwaysmanagedtooutlastthedroughtsMeggieremembered，butthiswasdifferent。Thegrasswaspatchynow；inbetweenitstussocksthedarkgroundshowed，crackedintoafinenetworkoffissuresgapinglikeparchedmouths。Forwhichmostlythanktherabbits。Inthefouryearsofherabsencetheyhadsuddenlymultipliedoutofallreason，thoughshesupposedtheyhadbeenbadformanyyearsbeforethat。Itwasjustthatalmostovernighttheirnumbershadreachedfarbeyondsaturationpoint。Theywereeverywhere，andthey，too，atethepreciousgrass。Shelearnedtosetrabbittraps，hatinginawaytoseethesweetlittlethingsmangledinsteelteeth，buttoomuchofalandpersonherselftoflinchfromdoingwhathadtobedone。Tokillinthenameofsurvivalwasn’tcruelty。

"GodrotthehomesickPommywhoshippedthefirstrabbitsoutfromEngland，"saidBobbitterly。

TheywerenotnativetoAustralia，andtheirsentimentalimportationhadcompletelyupsettheecologicalbalanceofthecontinentwheresheepandcattlehadnot，thesebeingscientificallygrazedfromthemomentoftheirintroduction。TherewasnonaturalAustralianpredatortocontroltherabbitnumbers，andimportedfoxesdidn’tthrive。Manmustbeanunnaturalpredator，butthereweretoofewmen，toomanyrabbits。

AfterMeggiegrewtoobigtositahorse，shespentherdaysinthehomesteadwithMrs。Smith，MinnieandCat，sewingorknittingforthelittlethingsquirminginsideher。He(shealwaysthoughtofitashe)wasapartofherasJustineneverhadbeen；shesufferednosicknessordepression，andlookedforwardeagerlytobearinghim。PerhapsJustinewasinadvertentlyresponsibleforsomeofthis；nowthatthelittlepale-eyedthingwaschangingfromamindlessbabytoanextremelyintelligentgirlchild，Meggiefoundherselffascinatedwiththeprocessandthechild。ItwasalongtimesinceshehadbeenindifferenttoJustine，andsheyearnedtolavishloveuponherdaughter，hugher，kissher，laughwithher。Tobepolitelyrebuffedwasashock，butthatwaswhatJustinedidateveryaffectionateoverture。WhenJimsandPatsyleftRiverview，Mrs。Smithhadthoughttogetthembackunderherwingagain，thencamethedisappointmentofdiscoveringtheywereawayinthepaddocksmostofthetime。SoMrs。SmithturnedtolittleJustine，andfoundherselfasfirmlyshutoutasMeggiewas。ItseemedthatJustinedidn’twanttobehugged，kissedormadetolaugh。Shewalkedandtalkedearly，atninemonths。Onceuponherfeetandincommandofaveryarticulatetongue，sheproceededtogoherownwayanddopreciselywhatevershewanted。Notthatshewaseithernoisyordefiant；simplythatshewasmadeofveryhardmetalindeed。Meggieknewnothingaboutgenes，butifshehadshemighthaveponderedupontheresultofaninterminglingofCleary，ArmstrongandO’neill。Itcouldn’tfailtobepowerfulhumansoup。

ButthemostdismayingthingwasJustine’sdoggedrefusaltosmileorlaugh。EverysoulonDroghedaturnedinsideoutperforminganticstomakehergerminateagrin，withoutsuccess。Whenitcametoinnatesolemnitysheoutdidhergrandmother。OnthefirstofOctober，whenJustinewasexactlysixteenmonthsold，Meggie’ssonwasbornonDrogheda。Hewasalmostfourweeksearlyandnotexpected；thereweretwoorthreesharpcontractions，thewaterbroke，andhewasdeliveredbyMrs。SmithandFeeafewminutesaftertheyrangforthedoctor。Meggiehadscarcely，hadtimetodilate。Thepainwasminimal，theordealsoquicklyoveritmighthardlyhavebeen；inspiteofthestitchesshehadtohavebecausehisentryintotheworldhadbeensoprecipitate，Meggiefeltwonderful。TotallydryforJustine，herbreastswerefulltooverflowing。NoneedforbottlesortinsofLactogenthistime。Andhewassobeautiful！Longandslender，withaquiffofflaxenhairatophisperfectlittleskull，andvividblueeyeswhichgavenohintofchanginglatertosomeothercolor。Howcouldtheychange？TheywereRalph’seyes，ashehadRalph’shands，Ralph’snoseandmouth，evenRalph’sfeet。MeggiewasunprincipledenoughtobeverythankfulLukehadbeenmuchthesamebuildandcoloringasRalph，muchthesameinfeatures。Butthehands，thewaythebrowsgrewin，thedownywidow’speak，theshapeofthefingersandtoes；theyweresomuchRalph，solittleLuke。Betterhopenoonerememberedwhichmanownedwhat。

"Haveyoudecided-onhisname？"askedFee；heseemedtofascinateher。Meggiewatchedherasshestoodholdinghim，andwasgrateful。Mumwasgoingtoloveagain；oh，maybenotthewayshehadlovedFrank，butatleastshewouldfeelsomething。

"I’mgoingtocallhimDane。"

"Whataqueername！Why？IsitanO’neillfamilyname？IthoughtyouwerefinishedwiththeO’neills？"

"It’sgotnothingtodowithLuke。Thisishisname，nooneelse’s。Ihatefamilynames；it’slikewishingapieceofsomeonedifferentontoanewperson。IcalledJustineJustinesimplybecauseIlikedthename，andI’mcallingDaneDaneforthesamereason。

"Well，itdoeshaveaniceringtoit，"Feeadmitted。Meggiewinced；herbreastsweretoofull。"Bettergivehimtome，Mum。Oh，Ihopehe’shungry！AndIhopeoldBluerememberstobringthatbreastpump。Otherwiseyou’regoingtohavetodriveintoGillyforit。"

Hewashungry；hetuggedathersohardhisgummylittlemouthhurt。Lookingdownonhim，theclosedeyeswiththeirdark，gold-tippedlashes，thefeatherybrows，thetinyworkingcheeks，Meggielovedhimsomuchthelovehurthermorethanhissuckingevercould。

Heisenough；hehastobeenough，I’llnotgetanymore。ButbyGod，RalphdeBricassart，bythatGodyoulovemorethanme，you’llneverknowwhatIstolefromyou-andfromHim。I’mnevergoingtotellyouaboutDane。Oh，mybaby！Shiftingonthepillowstosettlehimmorecomfortablyintothecrookofherarm，toseemoreeasilythatperfectlittleface。Mybaby！You’remine，andI’mnevergoingtogiveyouuptoanyoneelse。Leastofalltoyourfather，whoisapriestandcan’tacknowledgeyou。Isn’tthatwonderful？

TheboatdockedinGenoaatthebeginningofApril。ArchbishopRalphlandedinanItalyburstingintofull，Mediterraneanspring，andcaughtatraintoRome。Hadherequestedithecouldhavebeenmet，chauffeuredinaVaticancartoRome，buthedreadedtofeeltheChurchclosearoundhimagain；hewantedtoputthemomentoffaslongashecould。TheEternalCity。Itwastrulythat，hethought，staringoutofthetaxiwindowsatthecampanilesanddomes，andpigeon-strewnplazas，theambitiousfountains，theRomancolumnswiththeirbasesburieddeepinthecenturies。Well，tohimtheywereallsuperfluities。WhatmatteredtohimwasthepartofRomecalledtheVatican，itssumptuouspublicrooms，itsanythingbutsumptuousprivaterooms。

Ablack-and-cream-robedDominicanmonkledhimthroughhighmarblecorridors，amidbronzeandstonefiguresworthyofamuseum，pastgreatpaintingsinthestylesofGiotto，Raphael，Botticelli，FraAngelico。Hewasinthepublicroomsofagreatcardinal，andnodoubtthewealthyContini-Verchesefamilyhadgivenmuchtoenhancetheiraugustscion’ssurroundings。

Inaroomofivoryandgold，richwithcolorfromtapestriesandpictures，Frenchcarpetedandfurnished，everywheretouchesofcrimson，satVittorioScarbanza，CardinaldiContini-Verchese。Thesmallsmoothhand，itsrubyringglowing，wasextendedtohiminwelcome；gladtofixhiseyesdownward，ArchbishopRalphcrossedtheroom，knelt，tookthehandtokissthering。Andlaidhischeekagainstthehand，knowinghecouldn’tlie，thoughhehadmeanttorightupuntilthemomenthislipstouchedthatsymbolofspiritualpower，temporalauthority。

CardinalVittorioputhisotherhandonthebentshoulder，noddingadismissaltothemonk，thenasthedoorclosedsoftlyhishandwentfromshouldertohair，restedinitsdarkthickness，smootheditbacktenderlyfromthehalf-avertedforehead。Ithadchanged；soonitwouldbenolongerblack，butthecolorofiron。Thebentspinestiffened，theshoulderswentback，andArchbishopRalphlookeddirectlyupintohismaster’sface。Ah，therehadbeenachange！Themouthhaddrawnin，knewpainandwasmorevulnerable；theeyes，sobeautifulincolorandshapeandsetting，wereyetcompletelydifferentfromtheeyeshestillrememberedasifbodilytheyhadneverlefthim。CardinalVittoriohadalwayshadafancythattheeyesofJesuswereblue，andlikeRalph’s:calm，removedfromwhatHesawandthereforeabletoencompassall，understandall。Butperhapsithadbeenamistakenfancy。Howcouldonefeelforhumanityandsufferoneselfwithoutitsshowingintheeyes？

"Come，Ralph，sitdown。"

"YourEminence，Iwishtoconfess。"

"Later，later！Firstwewilltalk，andinEnglish。Thereareearseverywherethesedays，but，thankourdearJesus，notEnglish-speakingears。Sitdown，Ralph，please。Oh，itissogoodtoseeyou！Ihavemissedyourwisecounsel，yourrationality，yourperfectbrandofcompanionship。TheyhavenotgivenmeanyoneIlikehalfsowellasyou。"

Hecouldfeelhisbrainclickingintotheformalityalready，feeltheverythoughtsinhismindtakeonmorestiltedphrasing；morethanmostpeople，RalphdeBricassartknewhoweverythingaboutonechangedwithone’scompany，evenone’sspeech。NotfortheseearstheeasyfluencyofcolloquialEnglish。Sohesatdownnotfaraway，anddirectlyoppositetheslightfigureinitsscarletmoiré，thecolorchangingyetnotchanging，ofaqualitywhichmadeitsedgesfusewiththesurroundingsratherthanstandoutfromthem。Thedesperatewearinesshehadknownforweeksseemedtobeeasingalittlefromhisshoulders；hewonderedwhyhehaddreadedthismeetingso，whenhehadsurelyknowninhishearthewouldbeunderstood，forgiven。Butthatwasn’tit，notitatall。Itwashisownguiltathavingfailed，atbeinglessthanhehadaspiredtobe，atdisappointingamanwhohadbeeninterested，tremendouslykind，atruefriend。Hisguiltatwalkingintothispurepresencenolongerpurehimself。

"Ralph，wearepriests，butwearesomethingelsebeforethat；somethingwewerebeforewebecamepriests，andwhichwecannotescapeinspiteofourexclusiveness。Wearemen，withtheweaknessesandfailingsofmen。ThereisnothingyoucantellmewhichcouldaltertheimpressionsIformedofyouduringouryearstogether，nothingyoucouldtellmewhichwillmakemethinklessofyou，orlikeyouless。FormanyyearsIhaveknownthatyouhadescapedthisrealizationofourintrinsicweakness，ofourhumanity，butIknewyoumustcometoit，forwealldo。EventheHolyFather，whoisthemosthumbleandhumanofusall。"

"Ibrokemyvows，YourEminence。Thatisn’teasilyforgiven。It’ssacrilege。"

"Povertyyoubrokeyearsago，whenyouacceptedthebequestofMrs。MaryCarson。Whichleavescha/yandobedience，doesitnot？""Thenallthreewerebroken，YourEminence。"

"IwishyouwouldcallmeVittorio，asyouusedto！Iamnotshocked，Ralph，nordisappointed。ItisasOurLordJesusChristwills，andIthinkperhapsyouhadagreatlessontolearnwhichcouldnotbelearnedinanywaylessdestructive。Godismysterious，Hisreasonsbeyondourpoorcomprehension。ButIthinkwhatyoudidwasnotdonelightly，yourvowsthrownawayashavingnovalue。Iknowyouverywell。Iknowyoutobeproud，verymuchinlovewiththeideaofbeingapriest，veryconsciousofyourexclusiveness。Itispossiblethatyouneededthisparticularlessontoreducethatpride，makeyouunderstandthatyouarefirstaman，andthereforenotasexclusiveasyouthink。Isitnotso？""Yes。Ilackedhumility，andIbelieveinawayIaspiredtobeGodHimself。I’vesinnedmostgrievouslyandinexcusably。Ican’tforgivemyself，sohowcanIhopefordivineforgiveness？"

"Thepride，Ralph，thepride！Itisnotyourplacetoforgive，doyounotunderstandthatyet？OnlyGodcanforgive。OnlyGod！AndHewillforgiveifthesincererepentanceisthere。Hehasforgivengreatersinsfromfargreatersaints，youknow，aswellasfromfargreatervillains。DoyouthinkPrinceLuciferisnotforgiven？Hewasforgivenintheverymomentofhisrebellion。HisfateasrulerofHellishisown，notGod’sdoing。Didhenotsayit？"BettertoruleinHellthanserveinHeaven！"Forhecouldnotovercomehispride，hecouldnotbeartosubjugatehiswilltotheWillofSomeoneelse，eventhoughthatSomeonewasGodHimself。Idonotwanttoseeyoumakethesamemistake，mydearestfriend。Humilitywastheonequalityyoulacked，anditistheveryqualitywhichmakesagreatsaint-oragreatman。UntilyoucanleavethematterofforgivenesstoGod，youwillnothaveacquiredtruehumility。"

Thestrongfacetwisted。"Yes，Iknowyou’reright。ImustacceptwhatIamwithoutquestion，onlystrivetobebetterwithouthavingprideinwhatIam。Irepent，thereforeIshallconfessandawaitforgiveness。Idorepent，bitterly。"Hesighed；hiseyesbetrayedtheconflicthismeasuredwordscouldn’t，notinthisroom。

"Andyet，Vittorio，inawaytherewasnothingelseIcoulddo。EitherIruinedher，orItooktheruinuponmyself。Atthetimetheredidn’tseemtobeachoice，becauseIdoloveher。Itwasn’therfaultthatI’veneverwantedthelovetoextendtoaphysicalplane。Herfatebecamemoreimportantthanmyown，yousee。UntilthatmomentIhadalwaysconsideredmyselffirst，asmoreimportantthanshe，becauseIwasapriest，andshewasalesserbeing。ButIsawthatIwasresponsibleforwhatsheis……Ishouldhavelethergowhenshewasachild，butIdidn’t。Ikeptherinmyheartandsheknewit。IfIhadtrulypluckedheroutshewouldhaveknownthat，too，andshewouldhavebecomesomeoneIcouldn’tinfluence。"Hesmiled。"YouseethatIhavemuchtorepent。Itriedalittlecreatingofmyown。"

"ItwastheRose？"

Theheadwentback；ArchbishopRalphlookedattheelaborateceilingwithitsgildedmoldingsandbaroqueMuranochandelier。"Couldithavebeenanyoneelse？She’smyonlyattemptatcreation。"

"Andwillshebeallright，theRose？Didyoudohermoreharmbythisthanindenyingher？"

"Idon’tknow，Vittorio。IwishIdid！Atthetimeitjustseemedtheonlythingtodo。I’mnotgiftedwithPrometheanforesight，andemotionalinvolvementmakesoneapoorjudge。Besides，itsimply……happened！ButIthinkperhapssheneededmostwhatIgaveher，therecognitionofheridentityasawoman。Idon’tmeanthatshedidn’tknowshewasawoman。Imean1didn’tknow。IfIhadfirstmetherasawomanitmighthavebeendifferent，butIknewherasachildformanyyears。"

"Yousoundratherpriggish，Ralph，andnotyetreadyforforgiveness。Ithurts，doesitnot？Thatyoucouldhavebeenhumanenoughtoyieldtohumanweakness。Wasitreallydoneinsuchaspiritofnobleself-sacrifice？"Startled，helookedintotheliquiddarkeyes，sawhimselfreflectedinthemastwotinymanikinsofinsignificantproportion。"No，"hesaid。"I’maman，andasamanIfoundapleasureinherIdidn’tdreamexisted。Ididn’tknowawomanfeltlikethat，orcouldbethesourceofsuchprofoundjoy。Iwantednevertoleaveher，notonlybecauseofherbody，butbecauseIjustlovedtobewithher-talktoher，nottalktoher，eatthemealsshecooked，smileather，shareherthoughts。IshallmissheraslongasIlive。"TherewassomethinginthesallowasceticvisagewhichunaccountablyremindedhimofMeggie’sfaceinthatmomentofparting；thesightofaspiritualburdenbeingtakenup，theresolutenessofacharacterwellabletogoforwardinspiteofitsloads，itsgriefs，itspain。Whathadheknown，theredsilkcardinalwhoseonlyhumanaddictionseemedtobehislanguidAbyssiniancat？

"Ican’trepentofwhatIhadwithherinthatway，"RalphwentonwhenHisEminencedidn’tspeak。"Irepentthebreakingofvowsassolemnandbindingasmylife。Icanneveragainapproachmypriestlydutiesinthesamelight，withthesamezeal。Irepentthatbitterly。ButMeggie？"ThelookonhisfacewhenheutteredhernamemadeCardinalVittorioturnawaytodobattlewithhisownthoughts。

"TorepentofMeggiewouldbetomurderher。"Hepassedhishandtiredlyacrosshiseyes。"Idon’tknowifthat’sveryclear，orevenifitgetsclosetosayingwhatImean。Ican’tforthelifeofmeeverseemtoexpresswhatIfeelforMeggieadequately。"HeleanedforwardinhischairastheCardinalturnedback，andwatchedhistwinimagesgrowalittlelarger。Vittorio’seyeswerelikemirrors；theythrewbackwhattheysawanddidn’tpermitoneaglimpseofwhatwentonbehindthem。Meggie’seyeswereexactlytheopposite；theywentdownanddownanddown，allthewaytohersoul。"Meggieisabenediction，"hesaid。"She’saholythingtome，adifferentkindofsacrament。"

"Yes，Iunderstand，"sighedtheCardinal。"Itiswellyoufeelso。InOurLord’seyesIthinkitwillmitigatethegreatsin。ForyourownsakeyouhadbetterconfesstoFatherGiorgio，nottoFatherGuillermo。FatherGiorgiowillnotmisinterpretyourfeelingsandyourreasoning。Hewillseethetruth。FatherGuillermoislessperceptive，andmightdeemyourtruerepentancedebatable。"Afaintsmilecrossedhisthinmouthlikeawispyshadow。"They，too，aremen，myRalph，thosewhoheartheconfessionsofthegreat。Neverforgetitaslongasyoulive。OnlyintheirpriesthooddotheyactasvesselscontainingGod。Inallelsetheyaremen。AndtheforgivenesstheymeteoutcomesfromGod，buttheearswhichlistenandjudgebelongtomen。"

Therewasadiscreetknockonthedoor；CardinalVittoriosatsilentlyandwatchedtheteatraybeingcarriedtoabuhltable。"Yousee，Ralph？SincemydaysinAustraliaIhavebecomeaddictedtotheafternoonteahabit。Theymakeitquitewellinmykitchen，thoughtheyusednottoatfirst。"HehelduphishandasArchbishopRalphstartedtomovetowardtheteapot。"Ah，no！Ishallpouritmyself。Itamusesmetobe’mother。""

"IsawagreatmanyblackshirtsinthestreetsofGenoaandRome，"saidArchbishopRalph，watchingCardinalVittoriopour。"ThespecialcohortsofIIDuce。Wehaveaverydifficulttimeaheadofus，myRalph。TheHolyFatherisadamantthattherebenofracturebetweentheChurchandtheseculargovernmentofItaly，andheisrightinthisasinailthings。Nomatterwhathappens，wemustremainfreetoministertoallourchildren，evenshouldawarmeanourchildrenwillbedivided，fightingeachotherinthenameofaCatholicGod。Whereverourheartsandouremotionsmightlie，wemustendeavoralwaystokeeptheChurchremovedfrompoliticalideologiesandinternationalsquabbles。IwantedyoutocometomebecauseIcantrustyourfacenottogiveawaywhatyourbrainisthinkingnomatterwhatyoureyesmightbeseeing，andbecauseyouhavethebestdiplomaticturnofmindIhaveeverencountered。"

ArchbishopRalphsmiledruefully。"You’llfurthermycareerinspiteofme，won’tyou！IwonderwhatwouldhavehappenedtomeifIhadn’tmetyou？""Oh，youwouldhavebecomeArchbishopofSydney，anicepostandanimportantone，"saidHisEminencewithagoldensmile。"Butthewaysofourliveslienotinourhands。Wemetbecauseitwasmeanttobe，justasitismeantthatweworktogethernowfortheHolyFather。"

"Ican’tseesuccessattheendoftheroad，"saidArchbishopRalph。"Ithinktheresultwillbewhattheresultofimpartialityalwaysis。Noonewilllikeus，andeveryonewillcondemnus。"

"Iknowthat，sodoesHisHoliness。Butwecandonothingelse。Andthereisnothingtopreventourprayinginprivateforthespeedydownfallof11DuceandDerFuehrer，isthere？"

"Doyoureallythinktherewillbewar？"

"Icannotseeanypossibilityofavoidingit。"

HisEminence’scatstalkedoutofthesunnycornerwhereithadbeensleeping，andjumpeduponthescarletshimmeringlapalittleawkwardly，foritwasold。

"Ah，Sheba！SayhellotoyouroldfriendRalph，whomyouusedtoprefertome。"

ThesatanicyelloweyesregardedArchbishopRalphhaughtily，andclosed。Bothmenlaughed。

Droghedahadawirelessset。ProgresshadfinallycometoGillanboneintheshapeofanAustralianBroadcastingCommissionradiostation，andatlonglasttherewassomethingtorivalthepartylineformassentertainment。Thewirelessitselfwasaratheruglyobjectinawalnutcasewhichsatonasmallexquisitecabinetinthedrawingroom，itscar-batterypowersourcehiddeninthecupboardunderneath。

EverymorningMrs。Smith，FeeandMeggieturneditontolistentotheGillanbonedistrictnewsandweather，andeveryeveningFeeandMeggieturneditontolistentotheABCnationalnews。HowstrangeitwastobeinstantaneouslyconnectedwithOutside；tohearoffloods，fires，rainfallineverypartofthenation，anuneasyEurope，Australianpolitics，withoutbenefitofBlueyWilliamsandhisagednewspapers。WhenthenationalnewsonFriday，September1/，announcedthatHitlerhadinvadedPoland，onlyFeeandMeggiewerehometohearit，andneitherofthempaidanyattention。Therehadbeenspeculationformonths；besides，Europewashalfaworldaway。NothingtodowithDrogheda，whichwasthecenteroftheuniverse。ButonSunday，September3rdallthemenwereinfromthepaddockstohearFatherWattyThomassayMass，andthemenwereinterestedinEurope。NeitherFeenorMeggiethoughttotellthemofFriday’snews，andFatherWatty，whomighthave，leftinahurryforNarrengang。

Asusual，thewirelesssetwasswitchedonthateveningforthenationalnews。Butinsteadofthecrisp，absolutelyOxfordtonesoftheannouncer，therecamethegenteel，unmistakablyAustralianvoiceofthePrimeMinister，RobertGordonMenzies。

"FellowAustralians。ItismymelancholydutytoinformyouofficiallythatinconsequenceofthepersistencebyGermanyinherinvasionofPoland，GreatBritainhasdeclaredwaruponher，andthat，asaresult，Australiaisalsoatwar……

"ItmaybetakenthatHitler’sambitionisnottounitealltheGermanpeopleunderonerule，buttobringunderthatruleasmanycountriesascanbesubduedbyforce。Ifthisistogoon，therecanbenosecurityinEuropeandnopeaceintheworld……TherecanbenodoubtthatwhereGreatBritainstands，therestandthepeopleoftheentireBritishworld……"Ourstayingpower，andthatoftheMotherCountry，willbebestassistedbykeepingourproductiongoing，continuingouravocationsandbusiness，maintainingemployment，andwithit，ourstrength。Iknowthatinspiteoftheemotionswearefeeling，Australiaisreadytoseeitthrough。"MayGod，inHismercyandcompassion，grantthattheworldmaysoonbedeliveredfromthisagony。"

Therewasalongsilenceinthedrawingroom，brokenbythemegaphonaltonesofashort-waveNevilleChamberlainspeakingtotheBritishpeople；FeeandMeggielookedattheirmen。

"IfwecountFrank，therearesixofus，"saidBobintothesilence。"AllofusexceptFrankareontheland，whichmeanstheywon’twanttoletusserve。Ofourpresentstockmen，Ireckonsixwillwanttogoandtwowillwanttostay。"

"Iwanttogo！"saidJack，eyesshining。

"Andme，"saidHughieeagerly。

"Andus，"saidJimsonbehalfofhimselfandtheinarticulatePatsy。ButtheyalllookedatBob，whowastheboss。"We’vegottobesensible，"hesaid。"Woolisastapleofwar，andnotonlyforclothes。It’susedaspackinginammunitionandexplosives，forallsortsoffunnythingswedon’thearof，I’msure。Pluswehavebeefcattleforfood，andtheoldwethersandewesgoforhides，glue，tallow，lanolin-allwarstaples。

"Sowecan’tgooffandleaveDroghedatorunitself，nomatterwhatwemightwanttodo。Withawaronit’sgoingtobemightyhardtoreplacethestockmenwe’reboundtolose。Thedrought’sinitsthirdyear，we’rescrub-cutting，andthebunniesaredrivingussilly。Forthemomentourjob’shereonDrogheda；notveryexcitingcomparedtogettingintoaction，butjustasnecessary。We’llbedoingourbestbithere。"

Themalefaceshadfallen，thefemaleoneslightened。"WhatifitgoesonlongerthanoldPigIronBobthinksitwill？"askedHughie，givingthePrimeMinisterhisnationalnickname。Bobthoughthard，hisweatherbeatenvisagefulloffrowninglines。"Ifthingsgetworseanditgoesonforalongtime，thenIreckonaslongaswe’vegottwostockmenwecansparetwoClearys，butonlyifMeggie’swillingtogetbackintoproperharnessandworktheinsidepaddocks。Itwouldbeawfullyhardandingoodtimeswewouldn’tstandachance，butinthisdroughtIreckonfivemenandMeggieworkingsevendaysaweekcouldrunDrogheda。Yetthat’saskingalotofMeggie，withtwolittlebabies。""Ifithastobedone，Bob，ithastobedone，"saidMeggie。"Mrs。Smithwon’tminddoingherbitbytakingchargeofJustineandDane。WhenyougivethewordthatI’mneededtokeepDroghedauptofullproduction，I’llstartridingtheinsidepaddocks。"

"Thenthat’sus，thetwowhocanbespared，"saidJims，smiling。"No，it’sHughieandI，"saidJackquickly。

"ByrightsitoughttobeJimsandPatsy，"Bobsaidslowly。"You’retheyoungestandleastexperiencedasstockmen，whereassoldierswe’dallbeequallyinexperienced。Butyou’reonlysixteennow，chaps。"

"Bythetimethingsgetworsewe’llbeseventeen，"offeredJims。"We’lllookolderthanweare，sowewon’thaveanytroubleenlistingifwe’vegotaletterfromyouwitnessedbyHarryGough。"

"Well，rightatthemomentnooneisgoing。Let’sseeifwecan’tbringDroghedauptohigherproduction，evenwiththedroughtandthebunnies。"Meggielefttheroomquietly，wentupstairstothenursery。DaneandJustinewereasleep，eachinawhitepaintedcot。Shepassedherdaughterby，andstoodoverherson，lookingdownathimforalongtime。"ThankGodyou’reonlyababy，"shesaid。

ItwasalmostayearbeforethewarintrudeduponthelittleDroghedauniverse，ayearduringwhichonebyonethestockmenleft，therabbitscontinuedtomultiply，andBobbattledvaliantlytokeepthestationbookslookingworthyofawartimeeffort。ButatthebeginningofJune1940camethenewsthattheBritishExpeditionaryForcehadbeenevacuatedfromtheEuropeanmainlandatDunkirk；volunteersforthesecondAustralianImperialForcepouredinthousandsintotherecruitingcenters，JimsandPatsyamongthem。

Fouryearsof。ridingthepaddocksinallweathershadpassedthetwins’facesandbodiesbeyondyouth，tothatagelesscalmofcreasesattheoutercornersoftheeyes，linesdownthenosetothemouth。Theypresentedtheirlettersandwereacceptedwithoutcomment。Bushmenwerepopular。Theycouldusuallyshootwell，knewthevalueofobeyinganorder，andtheyweretough。JimsandPatsyhadenlistedinDubbo，butcampwastobeIngleburn，outsideSydney，soeveryonesawthemoffonthenightmail。CormacCarmichael，Eden’syoungestson，wasonthesametrainforthesamereason，goingtothesamecampasitturnedout。Sothetwofamiliespackedtheirboyscomfortablyintoafirst-classcompartmentandstoodaroundawkwardly，achingtoweepandkissandhavesomethingwarmingtoremember，butstifledbytheirpeculiarBritishmistrustofdemonstrativeness。ThebigC-36steamlocomotivehowledmournfully，thestationmasterbeganblowinghiswhistle。

Meggieleanedovertopeckherbrothersontheircheeksself-consciously，thendidthesametoCormac，wholookedjustlikehisoldestbrother，Connor；Bob，JackandHughiewrungthreedifferentyounghands；Mrs。Smith，weeping，wastheonlyonewhodidthekissingandcuddlingeveryonewasdyingtodo。EdenCarmichael，hiswifeandagingbutstillhandsomedaughterwithhim，wentthroughthesameformalities。TheneveryonewasoutsideontheGillyplatform，thetrainwasjerkingagainstitsbuffersandcreepingforward。"Goodbye，goodbye！"everyonecalled，andwavedbigwhitehandkerchiefsuntilthetrainwasasmokystreakintheshimmeringsunsetdistance。Togetherastheyhadrequested，JimsandPatsyweregazettedtotheraw，half-trainedNinthAustralianDivisionandshippedtoEgyptatthebeginningof1941，justintimetobecomeapartoftheroutatBenghazi。ThenewlyarrivedGeneralErwinRommelhadputhisformidableweightontheAxisendoftheseesawandbegunthefirstreversalofdirectioninthegreatcyclingrushesbackandforthacrossNorthAfrica。And，whiletherestoftheBritishforcesretreatedignominiouslyaheadofthenewAfrikaKorpsbacktoEgypt，theNinthAustralianDivisionwasdetailedtooccupyandholdTobruk，anoutpostinAxis-heldterritory。TheonlythingwhichmadetheplanfeasiblewasthatitwasstillaccessiblebyseaandcouldbesuppliedaslongasBritishshipscouldmoveintheMediterranean。TheRatsofTobrukholedupforeightmonths，andsawactionafteractionasRommelthreweverythinghehadatthemfromtimeto，time，withoutmanagingtodislodgethem。

"Doyouseknowwhyyouseishere？"askedPrivateColStuart，lickingthepaperonhiscigaretteandrollingitshutlazily。SergeantBobMalloyshiftedhisDiggerhatfarenoughupwardtoseehisquestionerfromunderitsbrim。"Shit，no，"hesaid，grinning；itwasanoft-askedquery。

"Well，it’sbetterthanwhitinggaitersinthebloodyglasshouse，"saidPrivateJimsCleary，pullinghistwinbrother’sshortsdownalittlesohecouldresthisheadcomfortablyonsoftwarmbelly。"Yair，butintheglasshouseyousedon’tkeepgettingshotat，"objectedCol，flickinghisdeadmatchatasunbathinglizard。"Iknowthismuch，mate，"saidBob，rearranginghishattoshadehiseyes。"I’drathergetshotatthandieoffuckin’boredom。"

Theywerecomfortably，disposedinadry，gravellydugoutjustoppositetheminesandbarbedwirewhichcutoffthesouthwestcorneroftheperimeter；ontheothersideRommelhungdoggedlyontohissinglepieceoftheTobrukterritory。Abig。50-caliberBrowningmachinegunsharedtheholewiththem，casesofammunitionneatlybesideit，butnooneseemedveryenergeticorinterestedinthepossibilityofattack。Theirrifleswereproppedagainstonewall，bayonetsglitteringinthebrilliantTobruksun。Fliesbuzzedeverywhere，butallfourwereAustralianbushmen，soTobrukandNorthAfricaheldnosurprisesinthewayofheat，dustorflies。"Justaswellyouseistwins，Jims，"saidCol，throwingpebblesatthelizard，whichdidn’tseemdisposedtomove。"Youselooklikeapairofpoofters，alltieduptogether。""You’rejustjealous。"Jimsgrinned，strokingPatsy’sbelly。"Patsy’sthebestpillowinTobruk。"

"Yair，allrightforyou，butwhataboutpoorPatsy？Goon，Harpo，saysomething！"Bobteased。

Patsy’swhiteteethappearedinasmile，butasusualheremainedsilent。Everyonehadtriedtogethimtotalk，butnoonehadeversucceededbeyondanessentialyesorno；inconsequencenearlyeveryonecalledhimHarpo，afterthevoicelessMarxbrother。

"Hearthenews？"askedColsuddenly。

"What？"

"TheSeventh’sMatildasgotplasteredbytheeightyeightsatHalfaya。OnlyguninthedesertbigenoughtowipeoutaMatilda。Wentthroughthembigbuggersoftankslikeadoseofsalts。"

"Oh，yeah，tellmeanother！"saidBobskeptically。"I’masergeantandIneverheardawhisper，you’reaprivateandyouknowallaboutit。Well，mate，there’sjustnothingJerry’sgotcapableofwipingoutabrigadeofMatildas。"

"IwasinMorshead’stentonamessagefromtheCOwhenIhearditcomethroughonthewireless，anditistrue，"Colmaintained。Forawhilenoonespoke；itwasnecessarytoeveryinhabitantofabeleagueredoutpostlikeTobrukthathebelieveimplicitlyhisownsidehadsufficientmilitarythrusttogethimout。Col’snewswasn’tverywelcome，moresobecausenotonesoldierinTobrukheldRommellightly。TheyhadresistedhiseffortstoblowthemoutbecausetheygenuinelybelievedtheAustralianfightingmanhadnopeersaveaGurkha，andiffaithisnine-tenthsofpower，theyhadcertainlyprovedthemselvesformidable。"BloodyPoms，"saidJims。"WhatweneedinNorthAfricaismoreAussies。"Thechorusofagreementwasinterruptedbyanexplosionontherimofthedugoutwhichblewthelizardintonothingandsentthefoursoldiersdivingforthemachinegunandtheirrifles。"Fuckin’Dagogrenade，allsplintersandnopunch，"Bobsaidwithasighofrelief。"IfthatwasaHitlerspecialwe’dbeplayingourharpsforsure，andwouldn’tyoulikethat，eh，Patsy？"

AtthebeginningofOperationCrusadertheNinthAustralianDivisionwasevacuatedbyseatoCairo，afteraweary，bloodysiegewhichseemedtohaveaccomplishednothing。However，whiletheNinthhadbeenholedupinsideTobruk，thesteadilyswellingranksofBritishtroopsinNorthAfricahadbecometheBritishEighthArmy，itsnewcommanderGeneralBernardLawMontgomery。

FeeworealittlesilverbroochformedintotherisingsunemblemoftheAIF；suspendedontwochainsbelowitwasasilverbar，onwhichshehadtwogoldstars，oneforeachsonunderarms。Itassuredeveryoneshemetthatshe，too，wasDoingHerBitfortheCountry。Becauseherhusbandwasnotasoldier，norherson，Meggiewasn’tentitledtowearabrooch。AletterhadcomefromLukeinformingherthathewouldkeeponcuttingthesugar；hethoughtshewouldliketoknowincaseshehadbeenworriedhemightjoinup。TherewasnoindicationthatherememberedawordofwhatshehadsaidthatmorningintheInghampub。Laughingwearilyandshakingherhead，shehaddroppedtheletterinFee’swastepaperbasket，wonderingasshedidsoifFeeworriedabouthersonsunderarms。Whatdidshereallythinkofthewar？ButFeeneversaidaword，thoughsheworeherbroocheverysingleday，allday。SometimesaletterwouldcomefromEgypt，fallingintotatterswhenitwasspreadopenbecausethecensor’sscissorshadfilleditwithneatrectangularholes，oncethenamesofplacesorregiments。Readingtheseletterswaslargelyamatterofpiecingtogethermuchoutof-virtuallynothing，buttheyservedonepurposewhichcastallothersintotheshade:whileevertheycame，theboyswerestillalive。Therehadbeennorain。Itwasasifeventhedivineelementsconspiredtoblighthope，for1941wasthefifthyearofadisastrousdrought。Meggie，Bob，Jack，HughieandFeeweredesperate。TheDroghedabankaccountwasrichenoughtobuyallthefeednecessarytokeepthesheepalive，butmostofthesheepwouldn’teat。Eachmobhadanaturalleader，theJudas；onlyiftheycouldpersuadetheJudastoeatdidtheystandahopewiththerest，butsometimeseventhesightofachewingJudascouldn’timpresstherestofthemobintoemulatingit。

SoDrogheda，too，wasseeingitsshareofbloodletting，andhatingit。Thegrasswasallgone，thegroundadarkcrackedwastelightenedonlybygreyanddunbrowntimberstands。Theyarmedthemselveswithknivesaswellasrifles；whentheysawananimaldownsomeonewouldcutitsthroattospareitalingeringdeath，eyelessfromthecrows。Bobputonmorecattleandhand-fedthemtokeepupDrogheda’swareffort。Therewasnoprofittobehadinitwiththepriceoffeed，fortheagrarianregionscloserinwerejustashardhitbylackofrainasthepastoralregionsfartherout。Cropreturnswereabysmallylow。However，wordhadcomefromRomethattheyweretodowhattheycouldregardlessofthecost。

WhatMeggiehatedmostofallwasthetimeshehadtoputinworkingthepaddocks。Droghedahadmanagedtoretainonlyoneofitsstockmen，andsofartherewerenoreplacements；Australia’sgreatestshortagehadalwaysbeenmanpower。SounlessBobnoticedherirritabilityandfatigue，andgaveherSundayoff，Meggieworkedthepaddockssevendaysaweek。However，ifBobgavehertimeoffitmeanthehimselfworkedharder，soshetriednottoletherdistressshow。Itneveroccurredtoherthatshecouldsimplyrefusetorideasastockman，pleadherbabiesasanexcuse。Theywerewellcaredfor，andBobneededhersomuchmorethantheydid。Shedidn’thavetheinsighttounderstandherbabiesneededher，too；thinkingofherlongingtobewiththemasselfishnesswhentheyweresowellcaredforbylovingandfamiliarhands。Itwasselfish，shetoldherself。Nordidshehavethekindofconfidencethatmighthavetoldherthatinherchildren’seyesshewasjustasspecialastheyweretoher。Sosherodethepaddocks，andforweeksonendgottoseeherchildrenonlyaftertheywereinbedforthenight。WheneverMeggielookedatDaneherheartturnedover。Hewasabeautifulchild；evenstrangersonthestreetsofGillyremarkedonitwhenFeetookhimintotown。Hishabitualexpressionwasasmilingone，hisnatureacuriouscombinationofquietnessanddeep，surehappiness；heseemedtohavegrownintohisidentityandacquiredhisself-knowledgewithnoneofthepainchildrenusuallyexperience，forherarelymademistakesaboutpeopleorthings，andnothingeverexasperatedorbewilderedhim。TohismotherhislikenesstoRalphwassometimesveryfrightening，butapparentlynooneelseevernoticed。RalphhadbeengonefromGillyforalongtime，andthoughDanehadthesamefeatures，thesamebuild，hehadonegreatdifference，whichtendedtocloudtheissue。Hishairwasn’tblacklikeRalph’s，itwasapalegold；notthecolorofwheatorsunsetbutthecolorofDroghedagrass，goldwithsilverandbeigeinit。

Fromthemomentsheseteyesonhim，Justineadoredherbabybrother。NothingwastoogoodforDane，nothingtoomuchtroubletofetchorpresentinhishonor。Oncehebegantowalksheneverlefthisside，forwhichMeggiewasverygrateful，worryingthatMrs。Smithandthemaidsweregettingtoooldtokeepasatisfactorilysharpeyeonasmallboy。OnoneofherrareSundaysoffMeggietookherdaughterontoherlapandspoketoherseriouslyaboutlookingafterDane。

"Ican’tbehereatthehomesteadtolookafterhimmyself，"shesaid，"soitalldependsonyou，Justine。，He’syourbabybrotherandyoumustalwayswatchoutforhim，makesurehedoesn’tgetintodangerortrouble。"Thelighteyeswereveryintelligent，withnoneoftheratherwanderingattentionspantypicalofafour-yearold。Justinenoddedconfidently。"Don’tworry，Mum，"shesaidbriskly。"I’llalwayslookafterhimforyou。""IwishIcouldmyself，"Meggiesighed。

"Idon’t，"saidherdaughtersmugly。"IlikehavingDanealltomyself。Sodon’tworry。Iwon’tletanythinghappentohim。"

Meggiedidn’tfindthereassuranceacomfort，thoughitwasreassuring。Thisprecociouslittlescrapwasgoingtostealhersonfromher，andtherewasnowayshecouldavertit。Backtothepaddocks，whileJustinestaunchlyguardedDane。Oustedbyherowndaughter，whowasamonster。Whoonearthdidshetakeafter？NotLuke，notherself，notFee。Atleastthesedaysshewassmilingandlaughing。Shewasfouryearsoldbeforeshesawanythingfunnyinanything，andthatsheeverdidwasprobablyduetoDane，whohadlaughedfrombabyhood。Becausehelaughed，sodidshe。Meggie’schildrenlearnedfromeachotherallthetime。Butitwasgalling，knowingtheycouldgetonwithouttheirmotherverywell。Bythetimethiswretchedconflictisover，Meggiethought，he’llbetoooldtofeelwhatheshouldforme。He’salwaysgoingtobeclosertoJustine。WhyisitthateverytimeIthinkI’vegotmylifeundercontrol，somethinghappens？Ididn’taskforthiswarorthisdrought，butI’vegotthem。

PerhapsitwasaswellDroghedawashavingsuchahardtimeofit。Ifthingshadbeeneasier，JackandHughiewouldhavebeenofftoenlistinasecond。Asitwas，theyhadnochoicebuttobuckledownandsalvagewhattheycouldoutofthedroughtwhichwouldcometobecalledtheGreatDrought。Overamillionsquaremilesofcrop-andstock-bearinglandwasaffected，fromsouthernVictoriatothewaist-highMitchellgrasslandsoftheNorthernTerritory。

Butthewarrivaledthedroughtforattention。WiththetwinsinNorthAfrica，thehomesteadpeoplefollowedthatcampaignwithpainfuleagernessasitpushedandpulledbackandforthacrossLibya。Theirheritagewasworkingclass，sotheywereardentLaborsupportersandloathedthepresentgovernment，Liberalbynamebutconservativebynature。WheninAugustof1941RobertGordonMenziessteppeddown，admittinghecouldn’tgovern，theywerejubilant，andwhenonOctober3rdtheLaborleaderJohnCurtinwasaskedtoformagovernment，itwasthebestnewsDroghedahadheardinyears。Allthrough1940and1941uneaseaboutJapanhadbeengrowing，especiallyafterRooseveltandChurchillcutoffherpetroleumsupplies。EuropewasalongwayawayandHitlerwouldhavetomarchhisarmiestwelvethousandmilesinordertoinvadeAustralia，butJapanwasAsia，partoftheYellowPerilpoisedlikeadescendingpendulumaboveAustralia’srich，empty，underpopulatedpit。SonooneinAustraliawasatallsurprisedwhentheJapaneseattackedPearlHarbor；theyhadsimplybeenwaitingforittocome，somewhere。Suddenlythewarwasveryclose，andmightevenbecometheirownbackyard。TherewerenogreatoceansseparatingAustraliafromJapan，onlybigislandsandlittleseas。

OnChristmasDay1941，HongKongfell；buttheJapswouldneversucceedintakingSingapore，everyonesaid，relieved。ThennewscameofJapaneselandingsinMalayandinthePhilippines；thegreatnavalbaseatthetoeoftheMalayanpeninsulakeptitshuge，flat-trajectoriedgunstrainedonthesea，itsfleetattheready。ButonFebruary8th，1942，theJapanesecrossedthenarrow

StraitofJohore，landedonthenorthsideofSingaporeIslandandcameacrosstothecitybehinditsimpotentguns。Singaporefellwithoutevenastruggle。

Andthengreatnews！AlltheAustraliantroopsinNorthAfricaweretocomehome。PrimeMinisterCurtinrodetheswellsofChurchillianwrathundismayed，insistingthatAustraliahadfirstcallonAustralianmen。TheSixthandSeventhAustralianDivisionsembarkedinAlexandriaquickly；theNinth，stillrecoveringinCairofromitsbatteringatTobruk，wastofollowassoonasmoreshipscouldbeprovided。Feesmiled，Meggiewasdeliriouswithjoy。JimsandPatsywerecominghome。

Onlytheydidn’t。WhiletheNorthwaitedforitstroopshipstheseesawtippedagain；theEighthArmywasinfullretreatbackfromBenghazi。PrimeMinisterChurchillstruckabargainwithPrimeMinisterCurtin。TheNinthAustralianDivisionwouldremaininNorthAfrica，inexchangefortheshipmentofanAmericandivisiontodefendAustralia……Poorsoldiers，shuttledaroundbydecisionsmadeinofficesnotevenbelongingtotheirowncountries。Givealittlehere，takealittlethere。ButitwasahardjoltforAustralia，todiscoverthattheMotherCountrywasbootingallherFarEasternchicksoutofthenest，evenapoultasfatandpromisingasAustralia。

OnthenightofOctober23rd，1942，itwasveryquietinthedesert。Patsyshiftedslightly，foundhisbrotherinthedarkness，andleaned。likeasmallchildrightintothecurveofhisshoulder。Jims’sarmwentaroundhimandtheysattogetherincompanionablesilence。SergeantBobMalloynudgedPrivateColStuart，grinned。

"Pairofpoofs，"hesaid。

"Fuckyou，too，"saidJims。

"Comeon，Harpo，saysomething，"Colmurmured。Patsygavehimanangelicsmileonlyhalfseeninthedarkness，openedhismouthandhootedanexcellentimitationofHarpoMarx’shorn。EveryoneforseveralyardshissedatPatsytoshutup；therewasanall-quietalerton。

"Christ，thiswaiting’skillingme，"Bobsighed。Patsyspokeinashout:"It’sthesilencethat’skillingme！""Youfuckin’side-showfraud，I’lldothekilling！"Colcroakedhoarsely，reachingforhisbayonet。

"ForCrissakepipedown！"camethecaptain’swhisper。"Who’sthebloodyidiotyelling？"

"Patsy，"chorusedhalfadozenvoices。

Theroaroflaughterfloatedreassuringlyacrosstheminefields，dieddowninastreamoflow-tonedprofanityfromthecaptain。SergeantMalloyglancedathiswatch；thesecondhandwasjustsweepingupto9:40pip-emma。Eighthundredandeighty-twoBritishgunsandhowitzersspoketogether。Theheavensreeled，thegroundlifted，expanded，couldnotsettle，forthebarragewentonandonwithoutasecond’sdiminutioninthemindshatteringvolumeofnoise。Itwasnousepluggingfingersinears；thegargantuanboomingcameupthroughtheearthandtraveledinwardtothebrainviathebones。WhattheeffectmusthavebeenonRommel’sfrontthetroopsoftheNinthintheirtrenchescouldonlyimagine。Usuallyitwaspossibletopickoutthistypeandsizeofartilleryfromthat，buttonighttheirironthroatschorusedinperfectharmony，andthunderedonastheminutespassed。Thedesertfitnotwiththelightofdaybutwiththefireofthesunitself；avastbillowingcloudofdustroselikecoilingsmokethousandsoffeet，glowingwiththeflashesofexplodingshellsandmines，theleapingflamesofmassiveconcentrationsofdetonatingcasings，ignitingpayloads。EverythingMontgomeryhadwasaimedattheminefields-guns，howitzers，mortars。AndeverythingMontgomeryhadwasthrownasfastasthesweatingartillerycrewscouldthrowit，slavesfeedingthemawsoftheirweaponslikesmallfranticbirdsahugecuckoo；guncasingsgrewhot，thetimebetweenrecoilandreloadshorterandshorterastheartillerymengotcarriedawayontheirownimpetus。Madmen，maddened，theydancedastereotypedpatternofattendanceontheirfieldpieces。

Itwasbeautiful，wonderful-thehighpointofanartilleryman’slife，whichhelivedandrelivedinhisdreams，wakingandsleeping，fortherestofhisanticlimacticdays。Andyearnedtohavebackagain，thosefifteenminuteswithMontgomery’sguns。

Silence。Stilled，absolutesilence，breakinglikewavesondistendedeardrums；unbearablesilence。Fiveminutesbeforeten，exactly。TheNinthgotupandmovedforwardoutofitstrenchesintonoman’sland，fixingbayonets，feelingforammunitionclips，releasingsafetycatches，checkingwaterbottles，ironrations，watches，tinhats，whetherbootlaceswerewelltied，thelocationofthosecarryingthemachineguns。Itwaseasytosee，intheunholyglowoffiresandred-hotsandmeltedintoglass；butthedustpallhungbetweentheEnemyandthem，theyweresafe。Forthemoment。Ontheveryedgeoftheminefieldstheyhalted，waited。

Tenpip-emma，onthedot。SergeantMalloyputhiswhistletohislipsandblewashrillblastupanddownthecompanylines；thecaptainshoutedhisforwardcommand。Onatwo-milefronttheNinthsteppedoffintotheminefieldsandthegunsbeganagainbehindthem，bellowing。Theycouldseewheretheyweregoingasifithadbeenday，thehowitzerstrainedonshortestrangeburstingshellsnotyardsinfrontofthem。Everythreeminutestherangeliftedanotherhundredyards；advancethosehundredyardsprayingitwasonlythroughantitankmines，orthattheS-mines，themanmines，hadbeenshelledoutofexistencebyMontgomery’sguns。TherewerestillGermansandItaliansinthefield，outpostsofmachineguns，50-mmsmallartillery，mortars。SometimesamanwouldsteponanUnexplodedS-mine，havetimetoseeitleapupwardoutofthesandbeforeitblewhiminhalf。Notimetothink，notimetodoanythingsavecrabscuttleintimetotheguns，ahundredyardsforwardeverythreeminutes，praying。Noise，light，dust，smoke，gut-wateringterror。Minefieldswhichhadnoend，twoorthreemilesofthemtotheotherside，andnogoingback。Sometimesinthetinypausesbetweenbarragescamethedistant，eerieskirlofabagpipeontheroastinggrittyair；ontheleftoftheNinthAustralian，theFiftyfirstHighlandersweretrekkingthroughtheminefieldswithapipertoleadeverycompanycommander。ToaScotthesoundof。hispiperdrawinghimintobattlewasthesweetestlureintheworld，andtoanAustralianveryfriendly，comforting。ButtoaGermanoranItalianitwashackle-raising。Thebattlewentonfortwelvedays，andtwelvedaysisaverylongbattle。TheNinthwasluckyatfirst；itscasualtieswererelativelylightthroughtheminefieldsandthroughthosefirstdaysofcontinuedadvanceintoRommel’sterritory。

"Youknow，I’dratherbemeandgetshotatthanbeasapper，"saidColStuart，leaningonhisshovel。

"Idunno，mate；Ithinkthey’vegotthebestofit，"growledhissergeant。"Waitingbehindthefuckin’linesuntilwe’vedoneallthework，thenouttheytoddlewiththeirbloodyminesweeperstoclearnicelittlepathsforthefuckin’tanks。"

"Itisn’tthetanksatfault，Bob；it’sthebrasswhodeploythem，"Jimssaid，pattingtheearthdownaroundthetopofhissectionoftheirnewtrenchwiththefiatofhisspade。"Christ，though，Iwishthey’ddecidetokeepusinoneplaceforawhile！I’vedugmoredirtinthelastfivedaysthanabloodyanteater。"

"Keepdigging，mate，"saidBobunsympathetically。

"Hey，look！"criedCol，pointingskyward。

EighteenRAFlightbomberscamedownthevalleyinperfectflying-schoolformation，droppingtheirsticksofbombsamongtheGermansandItalianswithdeadlyaccuracy。

"Bloodybeautiful，"saidSergeantBobMalloy，hislongnecktiltinghisheadatthesky。

Threedayslaterhewasdead；ahugepieceofshrapneltookoffhisarmandhalfhissideinafreshadvance，butnoonehadtimetostopexcepttopluckhiswhistlefromwhatwasleftofhismouth。Menweregoingdownnowlikeflies，tootiredtomaintaintheinitialpitchofvigilanceandswiftness；butwhatmiserablebarrengroundtheytooktheyheldonto，inthefaceofabitterdefensebythecreamofamagnificentarmy。Ithadbecometothemallnomorethanadumb，stubbornrefusaltobedefeated。TheNinthheldoffGrafvonSponeckandLungerhausenwhilethetanksbrokeouttothesouth，andfinallyRommelwasbeaten。ByNovember8hewastryingtorallybeyondtheEgyptianborder，andMontgomerywasleftincommandoftheentirefield。Averyimportanttacticalvictory，SecondAlamein；Rommelhadbeenforcedtoleavebehindmanyofhistanks，gunsandequipment。OperationTorchcouldcommenceitspusheastwardfromMoroccoandAlgeriawithmoresecurity。TherewasstillplentyoffightintheDesertFox，butalargepartofhisbrushwasonthegroundatElAlamein。ThebiggestandmostdecisivebattleoftheNorthAfricantheaterhadbeenfought，andFieldMarshalViscountMontgomeryofAlameinwasitsvictor。SecondAlameinwastheswansongoftheNinthAustralianDivisioninNorthAfrica。TheywerefinallygoinghometocontendwiththeJapanese，onthemainlandofNewGuinea。SinceMarchof1941theyhadbeenmoreorlesspermanentlyinthefrontline，arrivingpoorlytrainedandequipped，butgoinghomenowwithareputationexceededonlybytheFourthIndian-，

Division。AndwiththeNinthwentJimsandPatsy，safeandwhole。

OfcoursetheyweregrantedleavetogohometoDrogheda。BobdroveintoGillytocollectthemfromtheGoondiwinditrain，fortheNinthwasbasedinBrisbaneandwoulddepartafterjungletrainingforNewGuinea。WhentheRollssweptroundthedriveallthewomenwereoutonthelawnwaiting，JackandHughiehangingbackalittlebutjustaseagertoseetheiryoungbrothers。EverysheepleftaliveonDroghedacoulddropdeadifitsodesired，butthiswasaholiday。

Evenafterthecarstoppedandtheygotout，noonemoved。Theylookedsodifferent。Twoyearsinthedeserthadruinedtheiroriginaluniforms；theyweredressedinanewissueofjunglegreen，andlookedlikestrangers。Foronething，theyseemedtohavegrowninches，whichindeedtheyhad；thelasttwoyearsoftheirdevelopmenthadoccurredfarfromDrogheda，andhadpushedthemwayabovetheirolderbrothers。Notboysanymorebutmen，thoughnotmenintheBobJack-Hughiemold；hardship，battleeuphoriaandviolentdeathhadmadesomethingoutofthemDroghedanevercould。TheNorthAfricansunhaddriedanddarkenedthemtorosymahogany，peeledawayeverylayerofchildhood。Yes，itwaspossibletobelievethesetwomenintheirsimpleuniforms，slouchhatspinnedabovetheirleftearswiththebadgeoftheAIFrisingsun，hadkilledfellowmen。Itwasintheireyes，blueasPaddy’sbutsadder，withouthisgentleness。

"Myboys，myboys！"criedMrs。Smith，runningtothem，tearsstreamingdownherface。No，itdidn’tmatterwhattheyhaddone，howmuchtheyhadchanged；theywerestillherlittlebabiesshehadwashed，diapered，fed，whosetearsshehaddried，whosewoundsshehadkissedbetter。Onlythewoundstheyharborednowwerebeyondherpowertoheal。

Theneveryonewasaroundthem，Britishreservebrokendown，laughing，crying，evenpoorFeepattingthemontheirbacks，tryingtosmile。AfterMrs。SmiththerewasMeggietokiss，Minnietokiss，Cattokiss，Mumtohugbashfully，JackandHughietowringbythehandspeechlessly。TheDroghedapeoplewouldneverknowwhatitwasliketobehome，theycouldneverknowhowmuchthismomenthadbeenlongedfor，fearedfor。

Andhowthetwinsate！Armytuckerwasneverlikethis，theysaid，laughing。Pinkandwhitefairycakes，chocolate-soakedlamingtonsrolledincoconut，steamedspotteddogpudding，pavlovadrippingpassionfruitandcreamfromDroghedacows。Rememberingtheirstomachsfromearlierdays，Mrs。Smithwasconvincedthey’dbeillforaweek，butaslongastherewasunlimitedteatowashitdown，theydidn’tseemtohaveanytroublewiththeirdigestions。

"AbitdifferentfromWogbread，eh，Patsy？"

"Yair。"

"What’sWogmean？"askedMrs。Smith。

"AWog’sanArab，butaWop’sanItalian，right，Patsy？""Pair。"

Itwaspeculiar。Theywouldtalk，oratleastJimswouldtalk，forhoursaboutNorthAfrica:thetowns，thepeople，thefood，themuseuminCairo，lifeonboardatroopship，inrestcamp。Butnoamountofquestioningcouldelicitanythingbutvague，change-thesubjectanswersastowhattheactualfightinghadbeenlike，whatGazala，Benghazi，Tobruk，ElAlameinhadbeenlike。Lateronafterthewarwasoverthewomenweretofindthisconstantly；themenwhohadactuallybeeninthethickofbattleneveropenedtheirmouthsaboutit，refusedtojointheex-soldiers’clubsandleagues，wantednothingtodowithinstitutionsperpetuatingthememoryofwar。Droghedaheldapartyforthem。AlastairMacQueenwasintheNinthaswellandwashome，soofcourse

RudnaHunishheldaparty。DominicO’Rourke’stwoyoungestsonswereintheSixthinNewGuinea，soeventhoughtheycouldn’tbepresent，Dibban-Dibbanheldaparty。EverypropertyinthedistrictwithasoninuniformwantedtocelebratethesafereturnofthethreeNinthboys。Womenandgirlsflockedaroundthem，buttheClearyreturnedheroestriedtoescapeateveryopportunity，morescaredthantheyhadbeenonanyfieldofwar。Infact，JimsandPatsydidn’tseemtowanttohaveanythingtodowithwomen；itwastoBob，JackandHughietheyclung。Lateintothenightafterthewomenhadgonetobedtheysattalkingtothebrotherswhohadbeenforcedtoremainbehind，openingtheirsore，scarredhearts。AndtheyrodethepaddocksofparchedDrogheda，initsseventhyearofthedrought，gladtobeincivvies。

Evensorackedandtortured，toJimsandPatsythelandwasineffablylovely，thesheepcomforting，thelaterosesinthegardenaperfumeofsomeheaven。Andsomehowtheyhadtodrinkofitallsodeeplythey’dneveragainforget，forthatfirstgoingawayhadbeenacarelessone；theyhadhadnoideawhatitwouldbelike。Whentheyleftthistimeitwouldbewitheverymomenthoardedtorememberandtreasure，andwithDroghedarosespressedintotheirwalletsalongwithafewbladesofscarceDroghedagrass。ToFeetheywerekindandpitying，buttoMeggie，Mrs。Smith，MinnieandCattheywereloving，verytender。Theyhadbeentherealmothers。WhatdelightedMeggiemostwasthewaytheylovedDane，playedwithhumforhours，tookhimwiththemforrides，laughedwithhim，rolledhimoverandoveronthelawn。Justineseemedtofrightenthem；butthen，theywereawkwardwithanyonefemalewhomtheydidn’tknowaswellastheyknewtheolderwomen。Besideswhich，poorJustinewasfuriouslyjealousofthewaytheymonopolizedDane’scompany，foritmeantshehadnoonetoplaywith。

"He’sabonzerlittlebloke，Meggie，"saidJimstoMeggiewhenshecameoutontotheverandaoneday；hewassittinginacanechairwatchingPatsyandDaneplayingonthelawn。

"Yes，heisalittlebeauty，isn’the？"Shesmiled，sittingwhereshecouldseeheryoungestbrother。Hereyesweresoftwithpity；theyhadbeenherbabies，too。"What’sthematter，Jims？Can’tyoutellme？"Hiseyesliftedtohers，wretchedwithsomedeeppain，butheshookhisheadasifnoteventempted"No，Meggie。Itisn’tanythingIcouldevertellawoman。"

"Whataboutwhenallthisisoverandyoumarry？Won’tyouwanttotellyourwife？"

"Usmarry？Idon’tthinkso。Wartakesallthatoutofaman。Wewereitchingtogo，butwe’rewisernow。Ifwemarriedwe’dhavesons，andforwhat？Seethemgrowup，getpushedofftodowhatwe’vedone，seewhatwe’veseen？"

"Don’t，Jims，don’t！"

Hisgazefollowedhers，toDanechucklingingleebecausePatsywasholdinghimupsidedown。

"Don’teverlethimleaveDrogheda，Meggie。OnDroghedahecan’tcometoanyharm，"saidJims。

ArchbishopdeBricassartrandownthebeautifulhighcorridor，heedlessofthesurprisedfacesturningtowatchhim；heburstintotheCardinal’sroomandstoppedshort。HisEminencewasentertainingMonsieurPapee，thePolishgovernment-in-exile’sambassadortotheHolySee。"Why，Ralph！Whatisit？"

"It’shappened，Vittorio。Mussolinihasbeenoverthrown。"

"DearJesus！TheHolyFather，doesheknow？"

"ItelephonedCastelGandolfomyself，though

radioshouldhaveitanyminute。AfriendatGermanheadquartersphonedme。""IdohopetheHolyFatherhashisbagspacked，"saidMonsieurPapeewithafaint，averyfaintrelish。

"IfwedisguisedhimasaFranciscanmendicanthemightgetout，nototherwise，"ArchbishopRalphsnapped。"Kesselringhasthecitysealedtighterthanadrum。"

"Hewouldn’tgoanyway，"saidCardinalVittorio。MonsieurPapeegotup。"Imustleaveyou，YourEminence。IamtherepresentativeofagovernmentwhichisGermany’senemy。IfHisHolinessisnotsafe，noram1。TherearepapersinmyroomsImustattendto。Primandprecise，diplomattohisfingertips，heleftthetwopriestsalone。

"Hewasheretointercedeforhispersecutedpeople？"

"Yes。Poorman，hecaressomuchforthem。"

"Anddon’twe？"

"Ofcoursewedo，Ralph！Butthesituationismoredifficultthanheknows。"

"Thetruthofthematterishe’snotbelieved。"

"Ralph！"

"Well，isn’titthetruth？TheHolyFatherspenthisearlyyearsinMunich，hefellinlovewiththeGermansandhestilllovesthem，inspiteofeverything。Ifproofintheformofthosepoorwastedbodieswaslaidoutinfrontofhiseyes，he’dsayitmustbetheRussiansdidit。Nothisso-dearGermans，neverapeopleasculturedandcivilizedastheyare！""Ralph，youarenotamemberoftheSocietyofJesus，butyouarehereonlybecauseyouhavetakenapersonaloathofallegiancetotheHolyFather。YouhavethehotbloodofyourIrishandNormanforebears，butIbegofyou，besensible！SincelastSeptemberwehavebeenonlywaitingfortheaxetofall，praying11DucewouldremaintoshelterusfromGermanreprisal。

AdolfHitlerhasacuriousstreakofcontradictioninhispersonality，fortherearetwothingsheknowstobehisenemiesyetwishesifatallpossibletopreserve:theBritishEmpireandtheHolyCatholicChurchofRome。Butwhenpushedtoit，hehasdonehislevelbesttocrushtheBritishEmpire。Doyouthinkhewouldnotcrushus，too，ifwepushhimtoit？OnewordofdenunciationfromusastowhatishappeninginPolandandhewillcertainlycrushus。Andwhatearthlygooddoyouthinkourdenouncingthatwouldachieve，myfriend？Wehavenoarmies，nosoldiers。Reprisalwouldbeimmediate，andtheHolyFatherwouldbesenttoBerlin，whichiswhathefears。DoyounotrememberthepuppetpopeinAvignonallthosecenturiesago？DoyouwantourPopeapuppetinBerlin？"

"I’msorry，Vittorio，Ican’tseeitthatway。IsaywemustdenounceHitler，shouthisbarbarityfromtherooftops！Ifhehasusshotwe’lldiemartyrs，andthatwouldbemoreeffectivestill。"

"Youarenotusuallyobtuse，Ralph！Hewouldnothaveusshotatall。Heunderstandstheimpactofmartyrdomjustaswellaswedo。TheHolyFatherwouldbeshippedtoBerlin，andwewouldbeshippedquietlytoPoland。Poland，Ralph，Poland！DoyouwanttodieinPolandoflessusethanyouarenow？"

ArchbishopRalphsatdown，clenchedhishandsbetweenhisknees，staredrebelliouslyoutthewindowatthedovessoaring，goldeninthesettingsun，towardtheircote。Atforty-ninehewasthinnerthanofyore，andwasagingassplendidlyashedidmostthings。

"Ralph，wearewhatweare。Men，butonlyasasecondaryconsideration。Firstwearepriests。"

"Thatwasn’thowyoulistedourprioritieswhenIcamebackfromAustralia，Vittorio。"

"Imeantadifferentthingthen，andyouknowit。Youarebeingdifficult。Imeannowthatwecannotthinkasmen。Wemustthinkaspriests，becausethatisthemostimportantaspectofourlives。Whateverwemaythinkorwanttodoasmen，ourallegianceistotheChurch，andtonotemporalpower！OurloyaltyliesonlywiththeHolyFather！Youvowedobedience，Ralph。Doyouwishtobreakitagain？TheHolyFatherisinfallibleinallmattersaffectingthewelfareofGod’sChurch。""He’swrong！Hisjudgment’sbiased。AllofhisenergiesaredirectedtowardfightingCommunism。HeseesGermanyasitsgreatestenemy，theonlyrealfactorpreventingthewestwardspreadofCommunism。HewantsHitlertoremainfirmlyintheGermansaddle，justashewascontenttoseeMussoliniruleItaly。"

"Believeme，Ralph，therearethingsyoudonotknow。HeisthePope，heisinfallible！Ifyoudenythat，youdenyyourveryfaith。"

Thedooropeneddiscreetly，buthastily。

"YourEminence，HerrGeneralKesselring。"

Bothprelatesrose，theirlatedifferencessmoothedfromtheirfaces，smiling。

"Thisisagreatpleasure，YourExcellency。Won’tyousitdown？Wouldyouliketea？"

TheconversationwasconductedinGerman，sincemanyoftheseniormembersoftheVaticanspokeit。TheHolyFatherwasfondofspeakingandlisteningtoGerman。

"Thankyou，YourEminence，Iwould。NowhereelseinRomedoesonegetsuchsuperblyEnglishtea。"

CardinalVittoriosmiledguilelessly。"ItisahabitIacquiredwhileIwasthePapalLegateinAustralia，andwhich，forallmyinnateItalianness，Ihavenotbeenabletobreak。"

"Andyou，YourGrace？"

"I’manIrishman，HerrGeneral。TheIrish，too，arebroughtupontea。"GeneralAlbertKesselringalwaysrespondedtoArchbishopdeBricassartasonemantoanother；aftertheseslight，oilyItalianprelateshewassorefreshing，amanwithoutsubtletyorcunning，straightforward。

"Asalways，YourGrace，IamamazedatthepurityofyourGermanaccent，"hecomplimented。

"Ihaveanearforlanguages，HerrGeneral，whichmeansit’slikealltalents-notworthpraising。"

"WhatmaywedoforYourExcellency？"askedtheCardinalsweetly。"IpresumeyouwillhaveheardofthefateofIlDucebynow？""Yes，YourExcellency，wehave。"

"ThenyouwillknowinpartwhyIcame。Toassureyouthatalliswell，andtoaskyouifperhapsyouwouldconveythemessagetothosesummeringatCastelGandolfo？I’msobusyatthemomentit’simpossibleformetovisitCastelGandolfomyself。"

"Themessagewillbeconveyed。Youaresobusy？""Naturally。YoumustsurelyrealizethisisnowanenemycountryforusGermans？"

"This，HerrGeneral？ThisisnotItaliansoil，andnomanisanenemyhereexceptthosewhoareevil。"

"Ibegyourpardon，YourEminence。NaturallyIwasreferringtoItaly，nottotheVatican。ButinthematterofItalyImustactasmyFuehrercommands。Italywillbeoccupied，andmytroops，presentuntilnowasallies，willbecomepolicemen。"

ArchbishopRalph，sittingcomfortablyandlookingasifhehadneverhadanideologicalstruggleinhislife，watchedthevisitorclosely。DidheknowwhathisFuehrerwasdoinginPoland？Howcouldhenotknow？CardinalVittorioarrangedhisfaceintoananxiouslook。"DearGeneral，notRomeherself，surely？Ah，notRome，withherhistory，herpricelessartifacts？Ifyoubringtroopswithinhersevenhillstherewillbestrife，destruction。Ibegofyou，notthat！"

GeneralKesselringlookeduncomfortable。"Ihopeitwon’tcometothat，YourEminence。ButItookanoathalso，Itooamunderorders。ImustdoasmyFuehrerwishes。"

"You’lltryforus，HerrGeneral？Please，youmust！

IwasinAthenssomeyearsago，"saidArchbishopRalphquickly，leaningforward，hiseyescharminglywide，alockofwhite-sprinkledhairfallingacrosshisbrow；hewaswellawareofhiseffectonthegeneral，anduseditwithoutcompunction。"HaveyoubeeninAthens，sir？""Yes，Ihave，"saidthegeneraldryly。

"ThenI’msureyouknowthestory。HowittookmenofrelativelymoderntimestodestroythebuildingsatoptheAcropolis？HerrGeneral，Romestandsasshealwayswas，amonumenttotwothousandyearsofcare，attention，love。Please，Ibegofyou！Don’tendangerRome。"

Thegeneralstaredathiminstartledadmiration；hisuniformbecamehimverywell，butnobetterthanthesoutanewithitstouchofimperialpurplebecameArchbishopRalph。He，too，hadthelookofasoldier，asoldier’ssparelybeautifulbody，andthefaceofanangel。SomusttheArchangelMichaellook；notasmoothyoungRenaissanceboybutanagingperfectman，whohadlovedLucifer，foughthim，banishedAdamandEve，slaintheserpent，stoodatGod’srighthand。Didheknowhowhelooked？Hewasindeedamantoremember。

"Ishalldomybest，YourGrace，Ipromiseyou。Toacertainextentthedecisionismine，Iadmitit。Iam，asyouknow，acivilizedman。Butyou’reaskingalot。IfIdeclareRomeanopencity，itmeansIcannotblowupherbridgesorconvertherbuildingsintofortresses，andthatmightwellbetoGermany’seventualdisadvantage。WhatassurancesdoIhavethatRomewon’trepaymewithtreacheryifI’mkindtoher？"

CardinalVittoriopursedhislipsandmadekissingnoisesathiscat，anelegantSiamesenowadays；hesmiledgently，andlookedattheArchbishop。"Romewouldneverrepaykindnesswithtreachery，HerrGeneral。IamsurewhenyoudofindthetimetovisitthosesummeringatCastelGandolfothatyouwillreceivethesameassurances。Here，Kheng-see，mysweetheart！Ah，whatalovelygirlyouare！"Hishandspresseditdownonhisscarletlap，caressedit。"Anunusualanimal，YourEminence。"

"Anaristocrat，HerrGeneral。BoththeArchbishopandmyselfbearoldandvenerablenames，butbesideherlineage，oursareasnothing。Doyoulikehername？ItisChineseforsilkenflower。Apt，isitnot？"Theteahadarrived，wasbeingarranged；theywereallquietuntilthelaysisterlefttheroom。

"Youwon’tregretadecisiontodeclareRomeanopencity，YourExcellency，"saidArchbishopRalphtothenewmasterofItalywithameltingsmile。HeturnedtotheCardinal，charmfallingawaylikeadroppedcloak，notneededwiththisbelovedman。"YourEminence，doyouintendtobe"mother，"orshallIdothehonors？"was"Mother"？"askedGeneralKesselringblankly。CardinaldiContini-Vercheselaughed。"Itisourlittlejoke，wecelibatemen。Whoeverpourstheteaiscalled"mother。"AnEnglishsaying，HerrGeneral。"

ThatnightArchbishopRalphwastired，restless，onedge。Heseemedtobedoingnothingtohelpendthiswar，onlydickeraboutthepreservationofantiquities，andhehadgrowntoloatheVaticaninertiapassionately。Thoughhewasconservativebynature，sometimesthesnaillikecautionofthoseoccupyingthehighestChurchpositionsirkedhimintolerably。Asidefromthehumblenunsandpriestswhoactedasservants，itwasweekssincehehadspokentoanordinaryman，someonewithoutapolitical，spiritualormilitaryaxetogrind。Evenprayerseemedtocomelesseasilytohimthesedays，andGodseemedlight-yearsaway，asifHehadwithdrawntoallowHishumancreaturesfullreinindestroyingtheworldHehadmadeforthem。Whatheneeded，hethought，wasastiffdoseofMeggieandFee，orastiffdoseofsomeonewhowasn’tinterestedinthefateoftheVaticanorofRome。

HisGracewalkeddowntheprivatestairsintothegreatbasilicaofSaintPeter’s，whencehisaimlessprogresshadledhim。Itsdoorswerelockedthesedaysthemomentdarknessfell，asignoftheuneasypeacewhichlayoverRomemoretellingthanthecompaniesofgreycladGermansmovingthroughRomanstreets。Afaint，ghostlyglowilluminatedtheyawningemptyapse；hisfootstepsechoedhollowlyonthestonefloorashewalked，stoppedandmergedwiththesilenceashegenuflectedinfrontoftheHighAltar，beganagain。Then，betweenonefoot’snoiseofimpactandthenext，heheardagasp。Theflashlightinhishandsprangintolife；heleveledhisbeaminthedirectionofthesound，notfrightenedsomuchascurious。Thiswashisworld；hecoulddefenditsecurefromfear。

Thebeamplayeduponwhathadbecomeinhiseyesthemostbeautifulpieceofsculptureinallcreation:thePietaofMichelangelo。Belowthestilledstunnedfigureswasanotherface，madenotofmarblebutofflesh，allshadowedhollowsanddeathlike。

"Ciao，"saidHisGrace，smiling。

Therewasnoanswer，buthesawthattheclotheswerethoseofaGermaninfantrymanoflowestrank；hisordinaryman！ThathewasaGermandidn’tmatter。

"Wiegeht’s？"heasked，stillsmiling。

Amovementcausedsweatonawide，intellectualbrowtoflashsuddenlyoutofthedimness。

"Dubistkrank？"heaskedthen，wonderingifthelad，forhewasnomore，wasill。

Camethevoice，atlast:"Nein。"

ArchbishopRalphlaidhisflashlightdownonthefloorandwentforward，puthishandunderthesoldier’schinandliftedittolookintothedarkeyes，darkerinthedarkness。

"What’sthe"matter？"heaskedinGerman，andlaughed。"There！"hecontinued，stillinGerman。"Youdon’tknowit，butthat’sbeenmymainfunctioninlifetoaskpeoplewhat’sthematter。And，letmetellyou，it’saquestionwhichhasgotmeintoalotoftroubleinmytime。""Iclimetopray，"saidtheladinavoicetoodeepforhisage，withaheavyBavarianaccent。

"Whathappened，didyougetlockedin？"

"Yes，butthatisn’twhatthematteris。"

Hisgracepickeduptheflashlight。"Well，youcan’tstayhereallnight，andIhaven’tgotakeytothedoors。Comewithme。"Hebeganwalkingbacktowardtheprivatestairsleadinguptothepapalpalace，talkinginaslow，softvoice。"Icametopraymyself，asamatteroffact。ThankstoyourHighCommand，it’sbeenarathernastyday。That’sit，uphere……We’llhavetohopethattheHolyFather’sstaffdon’tassumeI’vebeenarrested，butcanseeI’mdoingtheescorting，notyou。"

Afterthattheywalkedfortenmoreminutesinsilence，throughcorridors，outintoopencourtsandgardens，insidehallways，upsteps；theyoungGermandidnotseemanxioustoleavehisprotector’sside，forhekeptclose。AtlastHisGraceopenedadoorandledhiswaifintoasmallsittingroom，sparselyandhumblyfurnished，switchedonalampandclosedthedoor。Theystoodstaringateachother，abletosee。TheGermansoldiersawaverytallmanwithafinefaceandblue，discerningeyes；ArchbishopRalphsawachildtrickedoutinthegarbwhichallofEuropefoundfearsomeandawe-inspiring。Achild；nomorethansixteenyearsold，certainly。Ofaverageheightandyouthfullythin，hehadaframepromisinglaterbulkandstrength，andverylongarms。Hisf-acehadratheranItalianatecast，darkandpatrician，extremelyattractive；wide，darkbrowneyeswithlongblacklashes，amagnificentheadofwavyblackhair。Therewasnothingusualorordinaryabouthimafterall，evenifhisrolewasanordinaryone；inspiteofthefactthathehadlongedtotalktoanaverage，ordinaryman，HisGracewasinterested。

"Sitdown，"hesaidtotheboy，crossingtoachestandunearthingabottleofMarsalawine。Hepouredsomeintotwoglasses，gavetheboyoneandtookhisowntoachairfromwhichhecouldwatchthefascinatingcountenancecomfortably。"Aretheyreducedtodraftingchildrentodotheirfighting？"heasked，crossinghislegs。"Idon’tknow，"saidtheboy。"Iwasinachildren’shome，soI’dbetakenearlyanyway。"

"What’syourname，lad？"

"RainerMoerlingHartheim，"saidtheboy，rollingitoutwithgreatpride。"Amagnificentname，"saidthepriestgravely。"Itis，isn’tit？Ichoseitmyself。TheycalledmeRainerSchmidtatthehome，butwhenIwentintothearmyIchangedittothenameI’vealwayswanted。"

"Youwereanorphan？"

"TheSisterscalledmealovechild。"

ArchbishopRalphtriednottosmile；theboyhadsuchdignityandself-possession，nowhehadlosthisfear。Onlywhathadfrightenedhim？Notbeingfound，orbeinglockedinthebasilica。

"Whywereyousofrightened，Rainer？"

Theboysippedhiswinegingerly，lookedupwithapleasedexpression。"Good，it’ssweet。"Hemadehimselfmorecomfortable。"IwantedtoseeSaintPeter’sbecausetheSistersalwaysusedtotalkaboutitandshowuspictures。SowhentheypostedustoRomeIwasglad。Wegotherethismorning。TheminuteIcould，Icame。"Hefrowned。"Butitwasn’tasIhadexpected。IthoughtrdfeelclosertoOurLord，beinginHisownChurch。Insteaditwasonlyenormousandcold。Icouldn’tfeelHim。"

ArchbishopRalphsmiled。"Iknowwhatyoumean。ButSaintPeter’sisn’treallyachurch，youknow。Notinthesensemostchurchesare。SaintPeter’sistheChurch。Ittookmealongtimetogetusedtoit，Iremember。""Iwantedtoprayfortwothings，"theboysaid，nod-dinghisheadtoindicatehehadheardbutthatitwasn’twhathewishedtohear。