第6章
Hefeltstrangelyattractedbythesingingandallthenoiseanduproarinthesaloonbelow……Someonecouldbeheardwithindancingfrantically,markingtimewithhisheelstothesoundsoftheguitarandofathinfalsettovoicesingingajauntyair。Helistenedintently,gloomilyanddreamily,bendingdownattheentranceandpeepinginquisitivelyinfromthepavement-
“Oh,myhandsomesoldierDon"tbeatmefornothing,“-
trilledthethinvoiceofthesinger。Raskolnikovfeltagreatdesiretomakeoutwhathewassinging,asthougheverythingdependedonthat。
“ShallIgoin？”hethought。“Theyarelaughing。Fromdrink。ShallI
getdrunk？”
“Won"tyoucomein？”oneofthewomenaskedhim。Hervoicewasstillmusicalandlessthickthantheothers,shewasyoungandnotrepulsive-theonlyoneofthegroup。
“Why,she"spretty,“hesaid,drawinghimselfupandlookingather。
Shesmiled,muchpleasedatthecompliment。
“You"reverynicelookingyourself,“shesaid。
“Isn"thethinthough！”observedanotherwomaninadeepbass。“Haveyoujustcomeoutofahospital？”
“They"reallgenerals"daughters,itseems,buttheyhaveallsnubnoses,“interposedatipsypeasantwithaslysmileonhisface,wearingaloosecoat。“Seehowjollytheyare。“
“Goalongwithyou！”
“I"llgo,sweetie！”
Andhedarteddownintothesaloonbelow。Raskolnikovmovedon。
“Isay,sir,“thegirlshoutedafterhim。
“Whatisit？”
Shehesitated。
“I"llalwaysbepleasedtospendanhourwithyou,kindgentleman,butnowIfeelshy。Givemesixcopecksforadrink,there"saniceyoungman！”
Raskolnikovgaveherwhatcamefirst-fifteencopecks。
“Ah,whatagood-naturedgentleman！”
“What"syourname？”
“AskforDuclida。“
“Well,that"stoomuch,“oneofthewomenobserved,shakingherheadatDuclida。“Idon"tknowhowyoucanasklikethat。IbelieveI
shoulddropwithshame……“
Raskolnikovlookedcuriouslyatthespeaker。Shewasapock-markedwenchofthirty,coveredwithbruises,withherupperlipswollen。Shemadehercriticismquietlyandearnestly。“Whereisit,“thoughtRaskolnikov。“WhereisitI"vereadthatsomeonecondemnedtodeathsaysorthinks,anhourbeforehisdeath,thatifhehadtoliveonsomehighrock,onsuchanarrowledgethathe"donlyroomtostand,andtheocean,everlastingdarkness,everlastingsolitude,everlastingtempestaroundhim,ifhehadtoremainstandingonasquareyardofspaceallhislife,athousandyears,eternity,itwerebettertolivesothantodieatonce!Onlytolive,toliveandlive!Life,whateveritmaybe!……Howtrueitis!GoodGod,howtrue!Manisavilecreature!……Andvileishewhocallshimvileforthat,“headdedamomentlater。
Hewentintoanotherstreet。“Bah,thePalaisdeCrystal!
RazumihinwasjusttalkingofthePalaisdeCrystal。ButwhatonearthwasitIwanted?Yes,thenewspapers……Zossimovsaidhe"dreaditinthepapers。Haveyouthepapers？”heasked,goingintoaveryspaciousandpositivelycleanrestaurant,consistingofseveralrooms,whichwerehoweverratherempty。Twoorthreepeopleweredrinkingtea,andinaroomfurtherawayweresittingfourmendrinkingchampagne。
RaskolnikovfanciedthatZametovwasoneofthem,buthecouldnotbesureatthatdistance。“Whatifitis！”hethought。
“Willyouhavevodka？”askedthewaiter。
“Givemesometeaandbringmethepapers,theoldonesforthelastfivedaysandI"llgiveyousomething。“
“Yes,sir,here"sto-day"s。Novodka？”
Theoldnewspapersandtheteawerebrought。Raskolnikovsatdownandbegantolookthroughthem。
“Oh,damn……thesearetheitemsofintelligence。Anaccidentonastaircase,spontaneouscombustionofashopkeeperfromalcohol,afireinPeski……afireinthePetersburgquarter……anotherfireinthePetersburgquarter……andanotherfireinthePetersburgquarter……
Ah,hereitis！”Hefoundatlastwhathewasseekingandbegantoreadit。Thelinesdancedbeforehiseyes,buthereaditallandbeganeagerlyseekinglateradditionsinthefollowingnumbers。Hishandsshookwithnervousimpatienceasheturnedthesheets。
Suddenlysomeonesatdownbesidehimathistable。Helookedup,itwastheheadclerkZametov,lookingjustthesame,withtheringsonhisfingersandthewatch-chain,withthecurly,blackhair,partedandpomaded,withthesmartwaistcoat,rathershabbycoatanddoubtfullinen。Hewasinagoodhumour,atleasthewassmilingverygailyandgood-humouredly。Hisdarkfacewasratherflushedfromthechampagnehehaddrunk。
“What,youhere？”hebeganinsurprise,speakingasthoughhe"dknownhimallhislife。“Why,Razumihintoldmeonlyyesterdayyouwereunconscious。Howstrange!AnddoyouknowI"vebeentoseeyou？”
Raskolnikovknewhewouldcomeuptohim。HelaidasidethepapersandturnedtoZametov。Therewasasmileonhislips,andanewshadeofirritableimpatiencewasapparentinthatsmile。
“Iknowyouhave,“heanswered。“I"veheardit。Youlookedformysock……AndyouknowRazumihinhaslosthishearttoyou?Hesaysyou"vebeenwithhimtoLuiseIvanovna"s,youknowthewomanyoutriedtobefriend,forwhomyouwinkedtotheExplosiveLieutenantandhewouldnotunderstand。Doyouremember?Howcouldhefailtounderstand-itwasquiteclear,wasn"tit？”
“Whatahotheadheis！”
“Theexplosiveone？”
“No,yourfriendRazumihin。“
“Youmusthaveajollylife,Mr。Zametov;entrancefreetothemostagreeableplaces。Who"sbeenpouringchampagneintoyoujustnow？”
“We"vejustbeen……havingadrinktogether……Youtalkaboutpouringitintome！”
“Bywayofafee!Youprofitbyeverything！”Raskolnikovlaughed,“it"sallright,mydearboy,“headded,slappingZametovontheshoulder。“Iamnotspeakingfromtemper,butinafriendlyway,forsport,asthatworkmanofyourssaidwhenhewasscufflingwithDmitri,inthecaseoftheoldwoman……“
“Howdoyouknowaboutit？”
“PerhapsIknowmoreaboutitthanyoudo。“
“Howstrangeyouare……Iamsureyouarestillveryunwell。Yououghtn"ttohavecomeout。“
“Oh,doIseemstrangetoyou？”
“Yes。Whatareyoudoing,readingthepapers？”
“Yes。“
“There"salotaboutthefires。“
“No,Iamnotreadingaboutthefires。“HerehelookedmysteriouslyatZametov;hislipsweretwistedagaininamockingsmile。“No,Iamnotreadingaboutthefires,“hewenton,winkingatZametov。“Butconfessnow,mydearfellow,you"reawfullyanxioustoknowwhatIamreadingabout？”
“Iamnotintheleast。Mayn"tIaskaquestion?Whydoyoukeepon……？”
“Listen,youareamanofcultureandeducation？”
“Iwasinthesixthclassatthegymnasium,“saidZametovwithsomedignity。
“Sixthclass!Ah,mycocksparrow!Withyourpartingandyourrings-youareagentlemanoffortune。Foo,whatacharmingboy！”HereRaskolnikovbrokeintoanervouslaughrightinZametov"sface。Thelatterdrewback,moreamazedthanoffended。
“Foo,howstrangeyouare！”Zametovrepeatedveryseriously。“I
can"thelpthinkingyouarestilldelirious。“
“Iamdelirious?Youarefibbing,mycocksparrow!SoIamstrange?
Youfindmecurious,doyou？”
“Yes,curious。“
“ShallItellyouwhatIwasreadingabout,whatIwaslookingfor?SeewhatalotofpapersI"vemadethembringme。Suspicious,eh？”
“Well,whatisit？”
“Youprickupyourears？”
“Howdoyoumean-prickupmyears？”
“I"llexplainthatafterwards,butnow,myboy,Ideclaretoyou……no,better"Iconfess"……No,that"snotrighteither;"I
makeadepositionandyoutakeit。"IdeposethatIwasreading,thatIwaslookingandsearching……“hescreweduphiseyesandpaused。“Iwassearching-andcamehereonpurposetodoit-fornewsofthemurderoftheoldpawnbrokerwoman,“hearticulatedatlast,almostinawhisper,bringinghisfaceexceedinglyclosetothefaceofZametov。Zametovlookedathimsteadily,withoutmovingordrawinghisfaceaway。WhatstruckZametovafterwardsasthestrangestpartofitallwasthatsilencefollowedforexactlyaminute,andthattheygazedatoneanotherallthewhile。
“Whatifyouhavebeenreadingaboutit？”hecriedatlast,perplexedandimpatient。“That"snobusinessofmine!Whatofit？”
“Thesameoldwoman,“Raskolnikovwentoninthesamewhisper,notheedingZametov"sexplanation,“aboutwhomyouweretalkinginthepoliceoffice,youremember,whenIfainted。Well,doyouunderstandnow？”
“Whatdoyoumean?Understand……what？”Zametovbroughtout,almostalarmed。
Raskolnikov"ssetandearnestfacewassuddenlytransformed,andhesuddenlywentoffintothesamenervouslaughasbefore,asthoughutterlyunabletorestrainhimself。Andinoneflashherecalledwithextraordinaryvividnessofsensationamomentintherecentpast,thatmomentwhenhestoodwiththeaxebehindthedoor,whilethelatchtrembledandthemenoutsidesworeandshookit,andhehadasuddendesiretoshoutatthem,toswearatthem,toputouthistongueatthem,tomockthem,tolaugh,andlaugh,andlaugh!
“Youareeithermad,or……“beganZametov,andhebrokeoff,asthoughstunnedbytheideathathadsuddenlyflashedintohismind。
“Or?Orwhat?What?Come,tellme！”
“Nothing,“saidZametov,gettingangry,“it"sallnonsense！”
Bothweresilent。AfterhissuddenfitoflaughterRaskolnikovbecamesuddenlythoughtfulandmelancholy。Heputhiselbowonthetableandleanedhisheadonhishand。HeseemedtohavecompletelyforgottenZametov。Thesilencelastedforsometime。
“Whydon"tyoudrinkyourtea?It"sgettingcold,“saidZametov。
“What!Tea?Oh,yes……“Raskolnikovsippedtheglass,putamorselofbreadinhismouthand,suddenlylookingatZametov,seemedtoremembereverythingandpulledhimselftogether。Atthesamemomenthisfaceresumeditsoriginalmockingexpression。Hewentondrinkingtea。
“Therehavebeenagreatmanyofthesecrimeslately,“saidZametov。
“OnlytheotherdayIreadintheMoscowNewsthatawholegangoffalsecoinershadbeencaughtinMoscow。Itwasaregularsociety。
Theyusedtoforgetickets！”
“Oh,butitwasalongtimeago!Ireadaboutitamonthago,“
Raskolnikovansweredcalmly。“Soyouconsiderthemcriminals？”headdedsmiling。
“Ofcoursetheyarecriminals。“
“They?Theyarechildren,simpletons,notcriminals!Why,halfahundredpeoplemeetingforsuchanobject-whatanidea!Threewouldbetoomany,andthentheywanttohavemorefaithinoneotherthaninthemselves!Onehasonlytoblabinhiscupsanditallcollapses。Simpletons!Theyengageduntrustworthypeopletochangethenotes-whatathingtotrusttoacasualstranger!Well,letussupposethatthesesimpletonssucceedandeachmakesamillion,andwhatfollowsfortherestoftheirlives?Eachisdependentontheothersfortherestofhislife!Betterhangoneselfatonce!Andtheydidnotknowhowtochangethenoteseither;themanwhochangedthenotestookfivethousandroubles,andhishandstrembled。Hecountedthefirstfourthousand,butdidnotcountthefifththousand-hewasinsuchahurrytogetthemoneyintohispocketandrunaway。
Ofcourseherousedsuspicion。Andthewholethingcametoacrashthroughonefool!Isitpossible？”
“Thathishandstrembled？”observedZametov,“yes,that"squitepossible。ThatIfeelquitesureispossible。Sometimesonecan"tstandthings。“
“Can"tstandthat？”
“Why,couldyoustanditthen?No,Icouldn"t。Forthesakeofahundredroublestofacesuchaterribleexperience!Togowithfalsenotesintoabankwhereit"stheirbusinesstospotthatsortofthing!No,Ishouldnothavethefacetodoit。Wouldyou？”
Raskolnikovhadanintensedesireagain“toputhistongueout。“
Shiverskeptrunningdownhisspine。
“Ishoulddoitquitedifferently,“Raskolnikovbegan。“ThisishowIwouldchangethenotes：I"dcountthefirstthousandthreeorfourtimesbackwardsandforwards,lookateverynoteandthenI"dsettothesecondthousand;I"dcountthathalfwaythroughandthenholdsomefiftyroublenotetothelight,thenturnit,thenholdittothelightagain-toseewhetheritwasagoodone?"Iamafraid,"I
wouldsay。"Arelationofminelosttwenty-fiveroublestheotherdaythroughafalsenote,"andthenI"dtellthemthewholestory。AndafterIbegancountingthethird,"no,excuseme,"Iwouldsay,"I
fancyImadeamistakeintheseventhhundredinthatsecondthousand,Iamnotsure。"AndsoIwouldgiveupthethirdthousandandgobacktothesecondandsoontotheend。AndwhenIhadfinished,I"dpickoutonefromthefifthandonefromthesecondthousandandtakethemagaintothelightandaskagain"changethem,please,"
andputtheclerkintosuchastewthathewouldnotknowhowtogetridofme。WhenI"dfinishedandhadgoneout,I"dcomeback,"No,excuseme,"andaskforsomeexplanation。That"showI"ddoit。“
“Foo,whatterriblethingsyousay！”saidZametov,laughing。“Butallthatisonlytalk。Idaresaywhenitcametodeedsyou"dmakeaslip。Ibelievethatevenapractised,desperatemancannotalwaysreckononhimself,muchlessyouandI。Totakeanexamplenearhome-thatoldwomanmurderedinourdistrict。Themurdererseemstohavebeenadesperatefellow,heriskedeverythinginopendaylight,wassavedbyamiracle-buthishandsshook,too。Hedidnotsucceedinrobbingtheplace,he"couldn"tstandit。Thatwasclearfromthe……“
Raskolnikovseemedoffended。
“Clear?Whydon"tyoucatchhimthen？”hecried,maliciouslygibingatZametov。
“Well,theywillcatchhim。“
“Who?You?Doyousupposeyoucouldcatchhim?You"veatoughjob!A
greatpointforyouiswhetheramanisspendingmoneyornot。Ifhehadnomoneyandsuddenlybeginsspending,hemustbetheman。Sothatanychildcanmisleadyou。“
“Thefactistheyalwaysdothat,though,“answeredZametov。“A
manwillcommitaclevermurderattheriskofhislifeandthenatoncehegoesdrinkinginatavern。Theyarecaughtspendingmoney,theyarenotallascunningasyouare。Youwouldn"tgotoatavern,ofcourse？”
RaskolnikovfrownedandlookedsteadilyatZametov。
“YouseemtoenjoythesubjectandwouldliketoknowhowIshouldbehaveinthatcase,too？”heaskedwithdispleasure。
“Ishouldliketo,“Zametovansweredfirmlyandseriously。
Somewhattoomuchearnestnessbegantoappearinhiswordsandlooks。
“Verymuch？”
“Verymuch！”
“Allrightthen。ThisishowIshouldbehave,“Raskolnikovbegan,againbringinghisfaceclosetoZametov"s,againstaringathimandspeakinginawhisper,sothatthelatterpositivelyshuddered。
“ThisiswhatIshouldhavedone。Ishouldhavetakenthemoneyandjewels,Ishouldhavewalkedoutofthereandhavegonestraighttosomedesertedplacewithfencesrounditandscarcelyanyonetobeseen,somekitchengardenorplaceofthatsort。Ishouldhavelookedoutbeforehandsomestoneweighingahundredweightormorewhichhadbeenlyinginthecornerfromthetimethehousewasbuilt。Iwouldliftthatstone-therewouldbesuretobeahollowunderit,andIwouldputthejewelsandmoneyinthathole。ThenI"drollthestonebacksothatitwouldlookasbefore,wouldpressitdownwithmyfootandwalkaway。Andforayearortwo,threemaybe,Iwouldnottouchit。And,well,theycouldsearch!There"dbenotrace。“
“Youareamadman,“saidZametov,andforsomereasonhetoospokeinawhisper,andmovedawayfromRaskolnikov,whoseeyeswereglittering。Hehadturnedfearfullypaleandhisupperlipwastwitchingandquivering。HebentdownascloseaspossibletoZametov,andhislipsbegantomovewithoututteringaword。Thislastedforhalfaminute;heknewwhathewasdoing,butcouldnotrestrainhimself。Theterriblewordtrembledonhislips,likethelatchonthatdoor;inanothermomentitwillbreakout,inanothermomenthewillletitgo,hewillspeakout。
“AndwhatifitwasIwhomurderedtheoldwomanandLizaveta？”hesaidsuddenlyand-realisedwhathehaddone。
Zametovlookedwildlyathimandturnedwhiteasthetablecloth。Hisfaceworeacontortedsmile。
“Butisitpossible？”hebroughtoutfaintly。Raskolnikovlookedwrathfullyathim。
“Ownupthatyoubelievedit,yes,youdid？”
“Notabitofit,Ibelieveitlessthanevernow,“Zametovcriedhastily。
“I"vecaughtmycocksparrow!Soyoudidbelieveitbefore,ifnowyoubelievelessthanever？”
“Notatall,“criedZametov,obviouslyembarrassed。“Haveyoubeenfrighteningmesoastoleaduptothis？”
“Youdon"tbelieveitthen?WhatwereyoutalkingaboutbehindmybackwhenIwentoutofthepoliceoffice?AndwhydidtheExplosiveLieutenantquestionmeafterIfainted?Hey,there,“heshoutedtothewaiter,gettingupandtakinghiscap,“howmuch？”
“Thirtycopecks,“thelatterreplied,runningup。
“Andthereistwentycopecksforvodka。Seewhatalotofmoney！”heheldouthisshakinghandtoZametovwithnotesinit。“Rednotesandblue,twenty-fiveroubles。WheredidIgetthem?Andwheredidmynewclothescomefrom?YouknowIhadnotacopeck。You"vecross-examinedmylandlady,I"llbebound……Well,that"senough!
Assezcause!Tillwemeetagain！”
Hewentout,tremblingalloverfromasortofwildhystericalsensation,inwhichtherewasanelementofinsufferablerapture。
Yethewasgloomyandterriblytired。Hisfacewastwistedasafterafit。Hisfatigueincreasedrapidly。Anyshock,anyirritatingsensationstimulatedandrevivedhisenergiesatonce,buthisstrengthfailedasquicklywhenthestimuluswasremoved。
Zametov,leftalone,satforalongtimeinthesameplace,plungedinthought。Raskolnikovhadunwittinglyworkedarevolutioninhisbrainonacertainpointandhadmadeuphismindforhimconclusively。
“IlyaPetrovitchisablockhead,“hedecided。
RaskolnikovhadhardlyopenedthedooroftherestaurantwhenhestumbledagainstRazumihinonthesteps。Theydidnotseeeachothertilltheyalmostknockedagainsteachother。Foramomenttheystoodlookingeachotherupanddown。Razumihinwasgreatlyastounded,thenanger,realangergleamedfiercelyinhiseyes。
“Sohereyouare！”heshoutedatthetopofhisvoice-“youranawayfromyourbed!AndhereI"vebeenlookingforyouunderthesofa!Wewentuptothegarret。IalmostbeatNastasyaonyouraccount。Andhereheisafterall。Rodya!Whatisthemeaningofit?Tellmethewholetruth!Confess!Doyouhear？”
“ItmeansthatI"msicktodeathofyouallandIwanttobealone,“
Raskolnikovansweredcalmly。
“Alone?Whenyouarenotabletowalk,whenyourfaceisaswhiteasasheetandyouaregaspingforbreath!Idiot!……WhathaveyoubeendoinginthePalaisdeCrystal?Ownupatonce！”
“Letmego！”saidRaskolnikovandtriedtopasshim。ThiswastoomuchforRazumihin;hegrippedhimfirmlybytheshoulder。
“Letyougo?Youdaretellmetoletyougo?DoyouknowwhatI"lldowithyoudirectly?I"llpickyouup,tieyouupinabundle,carryyouhomeundermyarmandlockyouup！”
“Listen,Razumihin,“Raskolnikovbeganquietly,apparentlycalm-
“can"tyouseethatIdon"twantyourbenevolence?Astrangedesireyouhavetoshowerbenefitsonamanwho……cursesthem,whofeelsthemaburdeninfact!Whydidyouseekmeoutatthebeginningofmyillness?MaybeIwasverygladtodie。Didn"tItellyouplainlyenoughto-daythatyouweretorturingme,thatIwas……sickofyou!
Youseemtowanttotorturepeople!Iassureyouthatallthatisseriouslyhinderingmyrecovery,becauseit"scontinuallyirritatingme。YousawZossimovwentawayjustnowtoavoidirritatingme。Youleavemealonetoo,forgoodness"sake!Whatrighthaveyou,indeed,tokeepmebyforce?Don"tyouseethatIaminpossessionofallmyfacultiesnow?How,canIpersuadeyounottopersecutemewithyourkindness?Imaybeungrateful,Imaybemean,onlyletmebe,forGod"ssake,letmebe!Letmebe,letmebe！”
Hebegancalmly,gloatingbeforehandoverthevenomousphraseshewasabouttoutter,butfinished,pantingforbreath,inafrenzy,ashehadbeenwithLuzhin。
Razumihinstoodamoment,thoughtandlethishanddrop。
“Well,gotohellthen,“hesaidgentlyandthoughtfully。“Stay,“heroared,asRaskolnikovwasabouttomove。“Listentome。Letmetellyou,thatyouareallasetofbabbling,posingidiots!Ifyou"veanylittletroubleyoubroodoveritlikeahenoveranegg。Andyouareplagiaristseveninthat!Thereisn"tasignofindependentlifeinyou!Youaremadeofspermacetiointmentandyou"velymphinyourveinsinsteadofblood。Idon"tbelieveinanyoneofyou!Inanycircumstancesthefirstthingforallofyouistobeunlikeahumanbeing!Stop！”hecriedwithredoubledfury,noticingthatRaskolnikovwasagainmakingamovement-“hearmeout!YouknowI"mhavingahouse-warmingthisevening,Idaresaythey"vearrivedbynow,butIleftmyunclethere-Ijustranin-toreceivetheguests。Andifyouweren"tafool,acommonfool,aperfectfool,ifyouwereanoriginalinsteadofatranslation……yousee,Rodya,I
recogniseyou"reacleverfellow,butyou"reafool!-andifyouweren"tafoolyou"dcomeroundtomethiseveninginsteadofwearingoutyourbootsinthestreet!Sinceyouhavegoneout,there"snohelpforit!I"dgiveyouasnugeasychair,mylandladyhasone……
acupoftea,company……Oryoucouldlieonthesofa-anywayyouwouldbewithus……Zossimovwillbetheretoo。Willyoucome？”
“No。“
“R-rubbish！”Razumihinshouted,outofpatience。“Howdoyouknow?
Youcan"tanswerforyourself!Youdon"tknowanythingaboutit……
ThousandsoftimesI"vefoughttoothandnailwithpeopleandrunbacktothemafterwards……Onefeelsashamedandgoesbacktoaman!Soremember,Potchinkov"shouseonthethirdstorey……“
“Why,Mr。Razumihin,Idobelieveyou"dletanybodybeatyoufromsheerbenevolence。“
“Beat?Whom?Me?I"dtwisthisnoseoffatthemereidea!
Potchinkov"shouse,47,Babushkin"sflat……“
“Ishallnotcome,Razumihin。“Raskolnikovturnedandwalkedaway。
“Ibetyouwill,“Razumihinshoutedafterhim。“Irefusetoknowyouifyoudon"t!Stay,hey,isZametovinthere？”
“Yes。“
“Didyouseehim？”
“Yes。“
“Talkedtohim？”
“Yes。“
“Whatabout?Confoundyou,don"ttellmethen。Potchinkov"shouse,47,Babushkin"sflat,remember！”
RaskolnikovwalkedonandturnedthecornerintoSadovyStreet。
Razumihinlookedafterhimthoughtfully。Thenwithawaveofhishandhewentintothehousebutstoppedshortofthestairs。
“Confoundit,“hewentonalmostaloud。“Hetalkedsensiblybutyet……Iamafool!Asifmadmendidn"ttalksensibly!AndthiswasjustwhatZossimovseemedafraidof。“Hestruckhisfingeronhisforehead。“Whatif……howcouldIlethimgooffalone?Hemaydrownhimself……Ach,whatablunder!Ican"t。“AndheranbacktoovertakeRaskolnikov,buttherewasnotraceofhim。WithacursehereturnedwithrapidstepstothePalaisdeCrystaltoquestionZametov。
RaskolnikovwalkedstraighttoX__Bridge,stoodinthemiddle,andleaningbothelbowsontherailstaredintothedistance。OnpartingwithRazumihin,hefeltsomuchweakerthathecouldscarcelyreachthisplace。Helongedtositorliedownsomewhereinthestreet。Bendingoverthewater,hegazedmechanicallyatthelastpinkflushofthesunset,attherowofhousesgrowingdarkinthegatheringtwilight,atonedistantatticwindowontheleftbank,flashingasthoughonfireinthelastraysofthesettingsun,atthedarkeningwaterofthecanal,andthewaterseemedtocatchhisattention。Atlastredcirclesflashedbeforehiseyes,thehousesseemedmoving,thepassers-by,thecanalbanks,thecarriages,alldancedbeforehiseyes。Suddenlyhestarted,savedagainperhapsfromswooningbyanuncannyandhideoussight。Hebecameawareofsomeonestandingontherightsideofhim;helookedandsawatallwomanwithakerchiefonherhead,withalong,yellow,wastedfaceandredsunkeneyes。Shewaslookingstraightathim,butobviouslyshesawnothingandrecognizednoone。Suddenlysheleanedherrighthandontheparapet,liftedherrightlegovertherailing,thenherleftandthrewherselfintothecanal。Thefilthywaterpartedandswallowedupitsvictimforamoment,butaninstantlaterthedrowningwomanfloatedtothesurface,movingslowlywiththecurrent,herheadandlegsinthewater,herskirtinflatedlikeaballoonoverherback。
“Awomandrowning!Awomandrowning！”shouteddozensofvoices;
peopleranup,bothbankswerethrongedwithspectators,onthebridgepeoplecrowdedaboutRaskolnikov,pressingupbehindhim。
“Mercyonit!it"sourAfrosinya！”awomancriedtearfullycloseby。
“Mercy!saveher!kindpeople,pullherout！”
“Aboat,aboat“wasshoutedinthecrowd。Buttherewasnoneedofaboat;apolicemanrandownthestepstothecanal,threwoffhisgreatcoatandhisbootsandrushedintothewater。Itwaseasytoreachher;shefloatedwithinacoupleofyardsfromthesteps,hecaughtholdofherclotheswithhisrighthandandwithhisleftseizedapolewhichacomradeheldouttohim;thedrowningwomanwaspulledoutatonce。Theylaidheronthegranitepavementoftheembankment。Shesoonrecoveredconsciousness,raisedherhead,satupandbegansneezingandcoughing,stupidlywipingherwetdresswithherhands。Shesaidnothing。
“She"sdrunkherselfoutofhersenses,“thesamewoman"svoicewailedatherside。“Outofhersenses。Theotherdayshetriedtohangherself,wecutherdown。Iranouttotheshopjustnow,leftmylittlegirltolookafterher-andhereshe"sintroubleagain!A
neighbour,gentlemanneighbour,welivecloseby,thesecondhousefromtheend,seeyonder……“
Thecrowdbrokeup。Thepolicestillremainedroundthewoman,someonementionedthepolicestation……Raskolnikovlookedonwithastrangesensationofindifferenceandapathy。Hefeltdisgusted。
“No,that"sloathsome……water……it"snotgoodenough,“hemutteredtohimself。“Nothingwillcomeofit,“headded,“nousetowait。Whataboutthepoliceoffice……?Andwhyisn"tZametovatthepoliceoffice?Thepoliceofficeisopentillteno"clock……“Heturnedhisbacktotherailingandlookedabouthim。
“Verywellthen！”hesaidresolutely;hemovedfromthebridgeandwalkedinthedirectionofthepoliceoffice。Hisheartfelthollowandempty。Hedidnotwanttothink。Evenhisdepressionhadpassed,therewasnotatracenowoftheenergywithwhichhehadsetout“tomakeanendofitall。“Completeapathyhadsucceededtoit。
“Well,it"sawayoutofit,“hethought,walkingslowlyandlistlesslyalongthecanalbank。“AnywayI"llmakeanend,forI
wantto……Butisitawayout?Whatdoesitmatter!There"llbethesquareyardofspace-ha!Butwhatanend!Isitreallytheend?
ShallItellthemornot?Ah……damn!HowtiredIam!IfIcouldfindsomewheretositorliedownsoon!WhatIammostashamedofisitsbeingsostupid。ButIdon"tcareaboutthateither!Whatidioticideascomeintoone"shead。“
Toreachthepoliceofficehehadtogostraightforwardandtakethesecondturningtotheleft。Itwasonlyafewpacesaway。Butatthefirstturninghestoppedand,afteraminute"sthought,turnedintoasidestreetandwenttwostreetsoutofhisway,possiblywithoutanyobject,orpossiblytodelayaminuteandgaintime。Hewalked,lookingattheground;suddenlysomeoneseemedtowhisperinhisear;heliftedhisheadandsawthathewasstandingattheverygateofthehouse。Hehadnotpassedit,hehadnotbeennearitsincethatevening。Anoverwhelmingunaccountablepromptingdrewhimon。Hewentintothehouse,passedthroughthegateway,thenintothefirstentranceontheright,andbeganmountingthefamiliarstaircasetothefourthstorey。Thenarrow,steepstaircasewasverydark。Hestoppedateachlandingandlookedroundhimwithcuriosity;onthefirstlandingtheframeworkofthewindowhadbeentakenout。“Thatwasn"tsothen,“hethought。HerewastheflatonthesecondstoreywhereNikolayandDmitrihadbeenworking。“It"sshutupandthedoornewlypainted。Soit"stolet。“Thenthethirdstoreyandthefourth。“Here！”Hewasperplexedtofindthedooroftheflatwideopen。Therewerementhere,hecouldhearvoices;hehadnotexpectedthat。Afterbriefhesitationhemountedthelaststairsandwentintotheflat。It,too,wasbeingdoneup;therewereworkmeninit。Thisseemedtoamazehim;hesomehowfanciedthathewouldfindeverythingasheleftit,evenperhapsthecorpsesinthesameplacesonthefloor。Andnow,barewalls,nofurniture;itseemedstrange。Hewalkedtothewindowandsatdownonthewindowsill。
Thereweretwoworkmen,bothyoungfellows,butonemuchyoungerthantheother。Theywerepaperingthewallswithanewwhitepapercoveredwithlilacflowers,insteadoftheold,dirty,yellowone。
Raskolnikovforsomereasonfelthorriblyannoyedbythis。Helookedatthenewpaperwithdislike,asthoughhefeltsorrytohaveitallsochanged。Theworkmenhadobviouslystayedbeyondtheirtimeandnowtheywerehurriedlyrollinguptheirpaperandgettingreadytogohome。TheytooknonoticeofRaskolnikov"scomingin;theyweretalking。Raskolnikovfoldedhisarmsandlistened。
“Shecomestomeinthemorning,“saidtheeldertotheyounger,“veryearly,alldressedup。"Whyareyoupreeningandprinking?"saysI。"Iamreadytodoanythingtopleaseyou,TitVassilitch!"That"sawayofgoingon!Andshedresseduplikearegularfashionbook！”
“Andwhatisafashionbook？”theyoungeroneasked。Heobviouslyregardedtheotherasanauthority。
“Afashionbookisalotofpictures,coloured,andtheycometothetailorshereeverySaturday,bypostfromabroad,toshowfolkshowtodress,themalesexaswellasthefemale。They"repictures。Thegentlemenaregenerallywearingfurcoatsandfortheladies"
fluffles,they"rebeyondanythingyoucanfancy。“
“There"snothingyoucan"tfindinPetersburg,“theyoungercriedenthusiastically,“exceptfatherandmother,there"severything！”
“Exceptthem,there"severythingtobefound,myboy,“theelderdeclaredsententiously。
Raskolnikovgotupandwalkedintotheotherroomwherethestrongbox,thebed,andthechestofdrawershadbeen;theroomseemedtohimverytinywithoutfurnitureinit。Thepaperwasthesame;thepaperinthecornershowedwherethecaseofikonshadstood。Helookedatitandwenttothewindow。Theelderworkmanlookedathimaskance。
“Whatdoyouwant？”heaskedsuddenly。
InsteadofansweringRaskolnikovwentintothepassageandpulledthebell。Thesamebell,thesamecrackednote。Herangitasecondandathirdtime;helistenedandremembered。Thehideousandagonisinglyfearfulsensationhehadfeltthenbegantocomebackmoreandmorevividly。Heshudderedateveryringanditgavehimmoreandmoresatisfaction。
“Well,whatdoyouwant?Whoareyou？”theworkmanshouted,goingouttohim。Raskolnikovwentinsideagain。
“Iwanttotakeaflat,“hesaid。“Iamlookinground。“
“It"snotthetimetolookatroomsatnight!andyououghttocomeupwiththeporter。“
“Thefloorshavebeenwashed,willtheybepainted？”Raskolnikovwenton。“Istherenoblood？”
“Whatblood？”
“Why,theoldwomanandhersisterweremurderedhere。Therewasaperfectpoolthere。“
“Butwhoareyou？”theworkmancried,uneasy。
“WhoamI？”
“Yes。“
“Youwanttoknow?Cometothepolicestation,I"lltellyou。“
Theworkmenlookedathiminamazement。
“It"stimeforustogo,wearelate。Comealong,Alyoshka。Wemustlockup,“saidtheelderworkman。
“Verywell,comealong,“saidRaskolnikovindifferently,andgoingoutfirst,hewentslowlydownstairs。“Hey,porter,“hecriedinthegateway。
Attheentranceseveralpeoplewerestanding,staringatthepassers-by;thetwoporters,apeasantwoman,amaninalongcoatandafewothers。Raskolnikovwentstraightuptothem。
“Whatdoyouwant？”askedoneoftheporters。
“Haveyoubeentothepoliceoffice？”
“I"vejustbeenthere。Whatdoyouwant？”
“Isitopen？”
“Ofcourse。“
“Istheassistantthere？”
“Hewasthereforatime。Whatdoyouwant？”
Raskolnikovmadenoreply,butstoodbesidethemlostinthought。
“He"sbeentolookattheflat,“saidtheelderworkman,comingforward。
“Whichflat？”
“Whereweareatwork。"Whyhaveyouwashedawaytheblood?"sayshe。"Therehasbeenamurderhere,"sayshe,"andI"vecometotakeit。"Andhebeganringingatthebell,allbutbrokeit。"Cometothepolicestation,"sayshe。"I"lltellyoueverythingthere。"Hewouldn"tleaveus。“
TheporterlookedatRaskolnikov,frowningandperplexed。
“Whoareyou？”heshoutedasimpressivelyashecould。
“IamRodionRomanovitchRaskolnikov,formerlyastudent,IliveinShil"shouse,notfarfromhere,flatNumber14,asktheporter,heknowsme。“Raskolnikovsaidallthisinalazy,dreamyvoice,notturninground,butlookingintentlyintothedarkeningstreet。
“Whyhaveyoubeentotheflat？”
“Tolookatit。“
“Whatistheretolookat？”
“Takehimstraighttothepolicestation,“themaninthelongcoatjerkedinabruptly。
Raskolnikovlookedintentlyathimoverhisshoulderandsaidinthesameslow,lazytone：
“Comealong。“
“Yes,takehim,“themanwentonmoreconfidently。“Whywashegoingintothat,what"sinhismind,eh？”
“He"snotdrunk,butGodknowswhat"sthematterwithhim,“mutteredtheworkman。
“Butwhatdoyouwant？”theportershoutedagain,beginningtogetangryinearnest-“Whyareyouhangingabout？”
“Youfunkthepolicestationthen？”saidRaskolnikovjeeringly。
“Howfunkit?Whyareyouhangingabout？”
“He"sarogue！”shoutedthepeasantwoman。
“Whywastetimetalkingtohim？”criedtheotherporter,ahugepeasantinafullopencoatandwithkeysonhisbelt。“Getalong!
Heisarogueandnomistake。Getalong！”
AndseizingRaskolnikovbytheshoulderheflunghimintothestreet。Helurchedforward,butrecoveredhisfooting,lookedatthespectatorsinsilenceandwalkedaway。
“Strangeman！”observedtheworkman。
“Therearestrangefolksaboutnowadays,“saidthewoman。
“Youshouldhavetakenhimtothepolicestationallthesame,“saidthemaninthelongcoat。
“Betterhavenothingtodowithhim,“decidedthebigporter。“A
regularrogue!Justwhathewants,youmaybesure,butoncetakehimup,youwon"tgetridofhim……Weknowthesort！”
“ShallIgothereornot？”thoughtRaskolnikov,standinginthemiddleofthethoroughfareatthecrossroads,andhelookedabouthim,asthoughexpectingfromsomeoneadecisiveword。Butnosoundcame,allwasdeadandsilentlikethestonesonwhichhewalked,deadtohim,tohimalone……Allatonceattheendofthestreet,twohundredyardsaway,inthegatheringduskhesawacrowdandheardtalkandshouts。Inthemiddleofthecrowdstoodacarriage……A
lightgleamedinthemiddleofthestreet。“Whatisit？”Raskolnikovturnedtotherightandwentuptothecrowd。Heseemedtoclutchateverythingandsmiledcoldlywhenherecognisedit,forhehadfullymadeuphismindtogotothepolicestationandknewthatitwouldallsoonbeover。
ChapterSevenANELEGANTcarriagestoodinthemiddleoftheroadwithapairofspiritedgreyhorses;therewasnooneinit,andthecoachmanhadgotoffhisboxandstoodby;thehorseswerebeingheldbythebridle……Amassofpeoplehadgatheredround,thepolicestandinginfront。Oneofthemheldalightedlanternwhichhewasturningonsomethinglyingclosetothewheels。Everyonewastalking,shouting,exclaiming;thecoachmanseemedatalossandkeptrepeating：
“Whatamisfortune!GoodLord,whatamisfortune！”
Raskolnikovpushedhiswayinasfarashecould,andsucceededatlastinseeingtheobjectofthecommotionandinterest。Onthegroundamanwhohadbeenrunoverlayapparentlyunconscious,andcoveredwithblood;hewasverybadlydressed,butnotlikeaworkman。Bloodwasflowingfromhisheadandface;hisfacewascrushed,mutilatedanddisfigured。Hewasevidentlybadlyinjured。
“Mercifulheaven！”wailedthecoachman,“whatmorecouldIdo?IfI"dbeendrivingfastorhadnotshoutedtohim,butIwasgoingquietly,notinahurry。EveryonecouldseeIwasgoingalongjustlikeeverybodyelse。Adrunkenmancan"twalkstraight,weallknow……Isawhimcrossingthestreet,staggeringandalmostfalling。
Ishoutedagainandasecondandathirdtime,thenIheldthehorsesin,buthefellstraightundertheirfeet!Eitherhediditonpurposeorhewasverytipsy……Thehorsesareyoungandreadytotakefright……theystarted,hescreamed……thatmadethemworse。
That"showithappened！”
“That"sjusthowitwas,“avoiceinthecrowdconfirmed。
“Heshouted,that"strue,heshoutedthreetimes,“anothervoicedeclared。
“Threetimesitwas,weallheardit,“shoutedathird。
Butthecoachmanwasnotverymuchdistressedandfrightened。Itwasevidentthatthecarriagebelongedtoarichandimportantpersonwhowasawaitingitsomewhere;thepolice,ofcourse,wereinnolittleanxietytoavoidupsettinghisarrangements。Alltheyhadtodowastotaketheinjuredmantothepolicestationandthehospital。Nooneknewhisname。
MeanwhileRaskolnikovhadsqueezedinandstoopedcloseroverhim。
Thelanternsuddenlylighteduptheunfortunateman"sface。Herecognisedhim。
“Iknowhim!Iknowhim！”heshouted,pushingtothefront。“It"sagovernmentclerkretiredfromtheservice,Marmeladov。HelivesclosebyinKozel"shouse……Makehasteforadoctor!Iwillpay,see。“Hepulledmoneyoutofhispocketandshowedittothepoliceman。Hewasinviolentagitation。
Thepoliceweregladthattheyhadfoundoutwhothemanwas。
Raskolnikovgavehisownnameandaddress,and,asearnestlyasifithadbeenhisfather,hebesoughtthepolicetocarrytheunconsciousMarmeladovtohislodgingatonce。
“Justhere,threehousesaway,“hesaideagerly,“thehousebelongstoKozel,arichGerman。Hewasgoinghome,nodoubtdrunk。
Iknowhim,heisadrunkard。Hehasafamilythere,awife,children,hehasonedaughter……Itwilltaketimetotakehimtothehospital,andthereissuretobeadoctorinthehouse。I"llpay,I"llpay!
Atleasthewillbelookedafterathome……theywillhelphimatonce。Buthe"lldiebeforeyougethimtothehospital。“Hemanagedtoslipsomethingunseenintothepoliceman"shand。Butthethingwasstraightforwardandlegitimate,andinanycasehelpwascloserhere。Theyraisedtheinjuredman;peoplevolunteeredtohelp。
Kozel"shousewasthirtyyardsaway。Raskolnikovwalkedbehind,carefullyholdingMarmeladov"sheadandshowingtheway。
“Thisway,thisway!Wemusttakehimupstairsheadforemost。Turnround!I"llpay,I"llmakeitworthyourwhile,“hemuttered。
KaterinaIvanovnahadjustbegun,asshealwaysdidateveryfreemoment,walkingtoandfroinherlittleroomfromwindowtostoveandbackagain,withherarmsfoldedacrossherchest,talkingtoherselfandcoughing。Oflateshehadbeguntotalkmorethanevertohereldestgirl,Polenka,achildoften,who,thoughtherewasmuchshedidnotunderstand,understoodverywellthathermotherneededher,andsoalwayswatchedherwithherbigclevereyesandstroveherutmosttoappeartounderstand。ThistimePolenkawasundressingherlittlebrother,whohadbeenunwellalldayandwasgoingtobed。Theboywaswaitingforhertotakeoffhisshirt,whichhadtobewashedatnight。Hewassittingstraightandmotionlessonachair,withasilent,seriousface,withhislegsstretchedoutstraightbeforehim-heelstogetherandtoesturnedout。
Hewaslisteningtowhathismotherwassayingtohissister,sittingperfectlystillwithpoutinglipsandwide-openeyes,justasallgoodlittleboyshavetositwhentheyareundressedtogotobed。Alittlegirl,stillyounger,dressedliterallyinrags,stoodatthescreen,waitingforherturn。Thedoorontothestairswasopentorelievethemalittlefromthecloudsoftobaccosmokewhichfloatedinfromtheotherroomsandbroughtonlongterriblefitsofcoughinginthepoor,consumptivewoman。KaterinaIvanovnaseemedtohavegrowneventhinnerduringthatweekandthehecticflushonherfacewasbrighterthanever。
“Youwouldn"tbelieve,youcan"timagine,Polenka,“shesaid,walkingabouttheroom,“whatahappyluxuriouslifewehadinmypapa"shouseandhowthisdrunkardhasbroughtme,andwillbringyouall,toruin!Papawasacivilcolonelandonlyastepfrombeingagovernor;sothateveryonewhocametoseehimsaid,"Welookuponyou,IvanMihailovitch,asourgovernor!"WhenI……when……“
shecoughedviolently,“oh,cursedlife,“shecried,clearingherthroatandpressingherhandstoherbreast,“whenI……whenatthelastball……atthemarshal"s……PrincessBezzemelnysawme-whogavemetheblessingwhenyourfatherandIweremarried,Polenka-sheaskedatonce"Isn"tthattheprettygirlwhodoncedtheshawldanceatthebreakingup?"(Youmustmendthattear,youmusttakeyourneedleanddarnitasIshowedyou,orto-morrow-cough,cough,cough-
hewillmaketheholebigger,“shearticulatedwitheffort。)“PrinceSchegolskoy,akammerjunker,hadjustcomefromPetersburgthen……
hedancedthemazurkawithmeandwantedtomakemeanoffernextday;
butIthankedhiminflatteringexpressionsandtoldhimthatmyhearthadlongbeenanother"s。Thatotherwasyourfather,Polya;papawasfearfullyangry……Isthewaterready?Givemetheshirt,andthestockings!Lida,“saidshetotheyoungestone,“youmustmanagewithoutyourchemiseto-night……andlayyourstockingsoutwithit……
I"llwashthemtogether……Howisitthatdrunkenvagabonddoesn"tcomein?Hehaswornhisshirttillitlookslikeadishclout,hehastornittorags!I"ddoitalltogether,soasnottohavetoworktwonightsrunning!Oh,dear!(Cough,cough,cough,cough!)Again!
What"sthis？”shecried,noticingacrowdinthepassageandthemenwhowerepushingintoherroom,carryingaburden。“Whatisit?Whataretheybringing?Mercyonus！”
“Wherearewetoputhim？”askedthepoliceman,lookingroundwhenMarmeladov,unconsciousandcoveredwithblood,hadbeencarriedin。
“Onthesofa!Puthimstraightonthesofa,withhisheadthisway,“
Raskolnikovshowedhim。
“Runoverintheroad!Drunk！”someoneshoutedinthepassage。
KaterinaIvanovnastood,turningwhiteandgaspingforbreath。Thechildrenwereterrified。LittleLidascreamed,rushedtoPolenkaandclutchedather,tremblingallover。
HavinglaidMarmeladovdown,RaskolnikovflewtoKaterinaIvanovna。
“ForGod"ssakebecalm,don"tbefrightened！”hesaid,speakingquickly,“hewascrossingtheroadandwasrunoverbyacarriage,don"tbefrightened,hewillcometo,Itoldthembringhimhere……
I"vebeenherealready,youremember?Hewillcometo;I"llpay！”
“He"sdoneitthistime！”KaterinaIvanovnacrieddespairinglyandsherushedtoherhusband。
Raskolnikovnoticedatoncethatshewasnotoneofthosewomenwhoswooneasily。Sheinstantlyplacedunderthelucklessman"sheadapillow,whichnoonehadthoughtofandbeganundressingandexamininghim。Shekeptherhead,forgettingherself,bitinghertremblinglipsandstiflingthescreamswhichwerereadytobreakfromher。
Raskolnikovmeanwhileinducedsomeonetorunforadoctor。Therewasadoctor,itappeared,nextdoorbutone。
“I"vesentforadoctor,“hekeptassuringKaterinaIvanovna,“don"tbeuneasy,I"llpay。Haven"tyouwater?……andgivemeanapkinoratowel,anything,asquickasyoucan……Heisinjured,butnotkilled,believeme……Weshallseewhatthedoctorsays！”
KaterinaIvanovnarantothewindow;there,onabrokenchairinthecorner,alargeearthenwarebasinfullofwaterhadbeenstood,inreadinessforwashingherchildren"sandhusband"slinenthatnight。
ThiswashingwasdonebyKaterinaIvanovnaatnightatleasttwiceaweek,ifnotoftener。Forthefamilyhadcometosuchapassthattheywerepracticallywithoutchangeoflinen,andKaterinaIvanovnacouldnotendureuncleanlinessand,ratherthanseedirtinthehouse,shepreferredtowearherselfoutatnight,workingbeyondherstrengthwhentherestwereasleep,soastogetthewetlinenhungonalineanddrybythemorning。ShetookupthebasinofwateratRaskolnikov"srequest,butalmostfelldownwithherburden。Butthelatterhadalreadysucceededinfindingatowel,wetteditandbegunwashingthebloodoffMarmeladov"sface。
KaterinaIvanovnastoodby,breathingpainfullyandpressingherhandstoherbreast。Shewasinneedofattentionherself。Raskolnikovbegantorealisethathemighthavemadeamistakeinhavingtheinjuredmanbroughthere。Thepoliceman,too,stoodinhesitation。
“Polenka,“criedKaterinaIvanovna,“runtoSonia,makehaste。Ifyoudon"tfindherathome,leavewordthatherfatherhasbeenrunoverandthatsheistocomehereatonce……whenshecomesin。Run,Polenka!there,putontheshawl。“
“Runyourfastest！”criedthelittleboyonthechairsuddenly,afterwhichherelapsedintothesamedumbrigidity,withroundeyes,hisheelsthrustforwardandhistoesspreadout。
Meanwhiletheroomhadbecomesofullofpeoplethatyoucouldn"thavedroppedapin。Thepolicemenleft,allexceptone,whoremainedforatime,tryingtodriveoutthepeoplewhocameinfromthestairs。AlmostallMadameLippevechsel"slodgershadstreamedinfromtheinnerroomsoftheflat;atfirsttheyweresqueezedtogetherinthedoorway,butafterwardstheyoverflowedintotheroom。KaterinaIvanovnaflewintoafury。
“Youmightlethimdieinpeace,atleast,“sheshoutedatthecrowd,“isitaspectacleforyoutogapeat?Withcigarettes!(Cough,cough,cough!)Youmightaswellkeepyourhatson……Andthereisoneinhishat!……Getaway!Youshouldrespectthedead,atleast！”
Hercoughchokedher-butherreproacheswerenotwithoutresult。
TheyevidentlystoodinsomeaweofKaterinaIvanovna。Thelodgers,oneafteranother,squeezedbackintothedoorwaywiththatstrangeinnerfeelingofsatisfactionwhichmaybeobservedinthepresenceofasuddenaccident,eveninthosenearestanddearesttothevictim,fromwhichnolivingmanisexempt,eveninspiteofthesincerestsympathyandcompassion。
Voicesoutsidewereheard,however,speakingofthehospitalandsayingthatthey"dnobusinesstomakeadisturbancehere。
“Nobusinesstodie！”criedKaterinaIvanovna,andshewasrushingtothedoortoventherwrathuponthem,butinthedoorwaycamefacetofacewithMadameLippevechselwhohadonlyjustheardoftheaccidentandranintorestoreorder。ShewasaparticularlyquarrelsomeandirresponsibleGerman。
“Ah,myGod！”shecried,claspingherhands,“yourhusbanddrunkenhorseshavetrampled!Tothehospitalwithhim!Iamthelandlady！”
“AmaliaLudwigovna,Ibegyoutorecollectwhatyouaresaying,“
KaterinaIvanovnabeganhaughtily(shealwaystookahaughtytonewiththelandladythatshemight“rememberherplace“andevennowcouldnotdenyherselfthissatisfaction)。“AmaliaLudwigovna……“
“IhaveyouoncebeforetoldthatyoutocallmeAmaliaLudwigovnamaynotdare;IamAmaliaIvanovna。“
“YouarenotAmaliaIvanovna,butAmaliaLudwigovna,andasIamnotoneofyourdespicableflattererslikeMr。Lebeziatnikov,who"slaughingbehindthedooratthismoment(alaughandacryof"theyareatitagain"wasinfactaudibleatthedoor)soIshallalwayscallyouAmaliaLudwigovna,thoughIfailtounderstandwhyyoudislikethatname。YoucanseeforyourselfwhathashappenedtoSemyonZaharovitch;heisdying。Ibegyoutoclosethatdooratonceandtoadmitnoone。Lethimatleastdieinpeace!OrIwarnyoutheGovernor-General,himself,shallbeinformedofyourconductto-morrow。Theprinceknewmeasagirl;heremembersSemyonZaharovitchwellandhasoftenbeenabenefactortohim。EveryoneknowsthatSemyonZaharovitchhadmanyfriendsandprotectors,whomheabandonedhimselffromanhonourablepride,knowinghisunhappyweakness,butnow(shepointedtoRaskolnikov)agenerousyoungmanhascometoourassistance,whohaswealthandconnectionsandwhomSemyonZaharovitchhasknownfromachild。Youmayrestassured,AmaliaLudwigovna……“
Allthiswasutteredwithextremerapidity,gettingquickerandquicker,butacoughsuddenlycutshortKaterinaIvanovna"seloquence。
Atthatinstantthedyingmanrecoveredconsciousnessandutteredagroan;sherantohim。TheinjuredmanopenedhiseyesandwithoutrecognitionorunderstandinggazedatRaskolnikovwhowasbendingoverhim。Hedrewdeep,slow,painfulbreaths;bloodoozedatthecornersofhismouthanddropsofperspirationcameoutonhisforehead。NotrecognisingRaskolnikov,hebeganlookingrounduneasily。KaterinaIvanovnalookedathimwithasadbutsternface,andtearstrickledfromhereyes。
“MyGod!Hiswholechestiscrushed!Howheisbleeding,“shesaidindespair。“Wemusttakeoffhisclothes。Turnalittle,SemyonZaharovitch,ifyoucan,“shecriedtohim。
Marmeladovrecognisedher。
“Apriest,“hearticulatedhuskily。
KaterinaIvanovnawalkedtothewindow,laidherheadagainstthewindowframeandexclaimedindespair：
“Oh,cursedlife！”
“Apriest,“thedyingmansaidagainafteramoment"ssilence。
“They"vegoneforhim,“KaterinaIvanovnashoutedtohim,heobeyedhershoutandwassilent。Withsadandtimideyeshelookedforher;shereturnedandstoodbyhispillow。Heseemedalittleeasierbutnotforlong。
SoonhiseyesrestedonlittleLida,hisfavourite,whowasshakinginthecorner,asthoughshewereinafit,andstaringathimwithherwonderingchildisheyes。
“A-ah,“hesignedtowardsheruneasily。Hewantedtosaysomething。
“Whatnow？”criedKaterinaIvanovna。
“Barefoot,barefoot！”hemuttered,indicatingwithfrenziedeyesthechild"sbarefeet。
“Besilent,“KaterinaIvanovnacriedirritably,“youknowwhysheisbarefooted。“
“ThankGod,thedoctor,“exclaimedRaskolnikov,relieved。
Thedoctorcamein,apreciselittleoldman,aGerman,lookingabouthimmistrustfully;hewentuptothesickman,tookhispulse,carefullyfelthisheadandwiththehelpofKaterinaIvanovnaheunbuttonedtheblood-stainedshirt,andbaredtheinjuredman"schest。
Itwasgashed,crushedandfractured,severalribsontherightsidewerebroken。Ontheleftside,justovertheheart,wasalarge,sinister-lookingyellowish-blackbruise-acruelkickfromthehorse"shoof。Thedoctorfrowned。Thepolicemantoldhimthathewascaughtinthewheelandturnedroundwithitforthirtyyardsontheroad。
“It"swonderfulthathehasrecoveredconsciousness,“thedoctorwhisperedsoftlytoRaskolnikov。
“Whatdoyouthinkofhim？”heasked。
“Hewilldieimmediately。“
“Istherereallynohope？”
“Notthefaintest!Heisatthelastgasp……Hisheadisbadlyinjured,too……Him……Icouldbleedhimifyoulike,but……itwouldbeuseless。Heisboundtodiewithinthenextfiveortenminutes。“
“Betterbleedhimthen。“
“Ifyoulike……ButIwarnyouitwillbeperfectlyuseless。“
Atthatmomentotherstepswereheard;thecrowdinthepassageparted,andthepriest,alittle,greyoldman,appearedinthedoorwaybearingthesacrament。Apolicemanhadgoneforhimatthetimeoftheaccident。Thedoctorchangedplaceswithhim,exchangingglanceswithhim。Raskolnikovbeggedthedoctortoremainalittlewhile。Heshruggedhisshouldersandremained。
Allsteppedback。Theconfessionwassoonover。Thedyingmanprobablyunderstoodlittle;hecouldonlyutterindistinctbrokensounds。KaterinaIvanovnatooklittleLida,liftedtheboyfromthechair,kneltdowninthecornerbythestoveandmadethechildrenkneelinfrontofher。Thelittlegirlwasstilltrembling;buttheboy,kneelingonhislittlebareknees,liftedhishandrhythmically,crossinghimselfwithprecisionandboweddown,touchingthefloorwithhisforehead,whichseemedtoaffordhimespecialsatisfaction。KaterinaIvanovnabitherlipsandheldbackhertears;sheprayed,too,nowandthenpullingstraighttheboy"sshirt,andmanagedtocoverthegirl"sbareshoulderswithakerchief,whichshetookfromthechestwithoutrisingfromherkneesorceasingtopray。Meanwhilethedoorfromtheinnerroomswasopenedinquisitivelyagain。Inthepassagethecrowdofspectatorsfromalltheflatsonthestaircasegrewdenseranddenser,buttheydidnotventurebeyondthethreshold。Asinglecandle-endlightedupthescene。
AtthatmomentPolenkaforcedherwaythroughthecrowdatthedoor。
Shecameinpantingfromrunningsofast,tookoffherkerchief,lookedforhermother,wentuptoherandsaid,“She"scoming,Imetherinthestreet。“Hermothermadeherkneelbesideher。
Timidlyandnoiselesslyayounggirlmadeherwaythroughthecrowd,andstrangewasherappearanceinthatroom,inthemidstofwant,rags,deathanddespair。She,too,wasinrags,herattirewasallofthecheapest,butdeckedoutingutterfineryofaspecialstamp,unmistakablybetrayingitsshamefulpurpose。Soniastoppedshortinthedoorwayandlookedaboutherbewildered,unconsciousofeverything。Sheforgotherfourth-hand,gaudysilkdress,sounseemlyherewithitsridiculouslongtrain,andherimmensecrinolinethatfilledupthewholedoorway,andherlight-colouredshoes,andtheparasolshebroughtwithher,thoughitwasnouseatnight,andtheabsurdroundstrawhatwithitsflaringflame-colouredfeather。Underthisrakishly-tiltedhatwasapale,frightenedlittlefacewithlipspartedandeyesstaringinterror。
Soniawasasmallthingirlofeighteenwithfairhair,ratherpretty,withwonderfulblueeyes。Shelookedintentlyatthebedandthepriest;shetoowasoutofbreathwithrunning。Atlastwhispers,somewordsinthecrowdprobably,reachedher。Shelookeddownandtookastepforwardintotheroom,stillkeepingclosetothedoor。
Theservicewasover。KaterinaIvanovnawentuptoherhusbandagain。TheprieststeppedbackandturnedtosayafewwordsofadmonitionandconsolationtoKaterinaIvanovnaonleaving。
“WhatamItodowiththese？”sheinterruptedsharplyandirritably,pointingtothelittleones。
“Godismerciful;looktotheMostHighforsuccour,“thepriestbegan。
“Ach!Heismerciful,butnottous。“
“That"sasin,asin,madam,“observedthepriest,shakinghishead。
“Andisn"tthatasin？”criedKaterinaIvanovna,pointingtothedyingman。
“Perhapsthosewhohaveinvoluntarilycausedtheaccidentwillagreetocompensateyou,atleastforthelossofhisearnings。“
“Youdon"tunderstand！”criedKaterinaIvanovnaangrilywavingherhand。“Andwhyshouldtheycompensateme?Why,hewasdrunkandthrewhimselfunderthehorses!Whatearnings?Hebroughtusinnothingbutmisery。Hedrankeverythingaway,thedrunkard!Herobbedustogetdrink,hewastedtheirlivesandminefordrink!
AndthankGodhe"sdying!Onelesstokeep！”
“Youmustforgiveinthehourofdeath,that"sasin,madam,suchfeelingsareagreatsin。“
KaterinaIvanovnawasbusywiththedyingman;shewasgivinghimwater,wipingthebloodandsweatfromhishead,settinghispillowstraight,andhadonlyturnednowandthenforamomenttoaddressthepriest。Nowsheflewathimalmostinafrenzy。
“Ah,father!That"swordsandonlywords!Forgive!Ifhe"dnotbeenrunover,he"dhavecomehometo-daydrunkandhisonlyshirtdirtyandinragsandhe"dhavefallenasleeplikealog,andIshouldhavebeensousingandrinsingtilldaybreak,washinghisragsandthechildren"sandthendryingthembythewindowandassoonasitwasdaylightIshouldhavebeendarningthem。That"showIspendmynights!……What"stheuseoftalkingofforgiveness!Ihaveforgivenasitis！”
Aterriblehollowcoughinterruptedherwords。Sheputherhandkerchieftoherlipsandshowedittothepriest,pressingherotherhandtoherachingchest。Thehandkerchiefwascoveredwithblood。Thepriestbowedhisheadandsaidnothing。
Marmeladovwasinthelastagony;hedidnottakehiseyesoffthefaceofKaterinaIvanovna,whowasbendingoverhimagain。Hekepttryingtosaysomethingtoher;hebeganmovinghistonguewithdifficultyandarticulatingindistinctly,butKaterinaIvanovna,understandingthathewantedtoaskherforgiveness,calledperemptorilytohim：
“Besilent!Noneed!Iknowwhatyouwanttosay！”Andthesickmanwassilent,butatthesameinstanthiswanderingeyesstrayedtothedoorwayandhesawSonia。
Tillthenhehadnotnoticedher：shewasstandingintheshadowinacorner。
“Who"sthat?Who"sthat？”hesaidsuddenlyinathickgaspingvoice,inagitation,turninghiseyesinhorrortowardsthedoorwherehisdaughterwasstanding,andtryingtositup。
“Liedown!Liedo-own！”criedKaterinaIvanovna。
Withunnaturalstrengthhehadsucceededinproppinghimselfonhiselbow。Helookedwildlyandfixedlyforsometimeonhisdaughter,asthoughnotrecognisingher。Hehadneverseenherbeforeinsuchattire。Suddenlyherecognisedher,crushedandashamedinherhumiliationandgaudyfinery,meeklyawaitingherturntosaygood-byetoherdyingfather。Hisfaceshowedintensesuffering。
“Sonia!Daughter!Forgive！”hecried,andhetriedtoholdouthishandtoher,butlosinghisbalance,hefelloffthesofa,facedownwardsonthefloor。Theyrushedtopickhimup,theyputhimonthesofa;buthewasdying。Soniawithafaintcryranup,embracedhimandremainedsowithoutmoving。Hediedinherarms。
“He"sgotwhathewanted,“KaterinaIvanovnacried,seeingherhusband"sdeadbody。“Well,what"stobedonenow?HowamItoburyhim!WhatcanIgivethemto-morrowtoeat？”
RaskolnikovwentuptoKaterinaIvanovna。
“KaterinaIvanovna,“hebegan,“lastweekyourhusbandtoldmeallhislifeandcircumstances……Believeme,hespokeofyouwithpassionatereverence。Fromthatevening,whenIlearnthowdevotedhewastoyouallandhowhelovedandrespectedyouespecially,KaterinaIvanovna,inspiteofhisunfortunateweakness,fromthateveningwebecamefriends……Allowmenow……todosomething……torepaymydebttomydeadfriend。HerearetwentyroublesIthink-
andifthatcanbeofanyassistancetoyou,then……I……inshort,Iwillcomeagain,Iwillbesuretocomeagain……Ishall,perhaps,comeagainto-morrow……Good-bye！”
Andhewentquicklyoutoftheroom,squeezinghiswaythroughthecrowdtothestairs。ButinthecrowdhesuddenlyjostledagainstNikodimFomitch,whohadheardoftheaccidentandhadcometogiveinstructionsinperson。Theyhadnotmetsincethesceneatthepolicestation,butNikodimFomitchknewhiminstantly。
“Ah,isthatyou？”heaskedhim。
“He"sdead,“answeredRaskolnikov。“Thedoctorandthepriesthavebeen,allasitshouldhavebeen。Don"tworrythepoorwomantoomuch,sheisinconsumptionasitis。Tryandcheerherup,ifpossible……
youareakind-heartedman,Iknow……“headdedwithasmile,lookingstraightinhisface。
“Butyouarespatteredwithblood,“observedNikodimFomitch,noticinginthelamplightsomefreshstainsonRaskolnikov"swaistcoat。
“Yes……I"mcoveredwithblood,“Raskolnikovsaidwithapeculiarair;thenhesmiled,noddedandwentdownstairs。
Hewalkeddownslowlyanddeliberately,feverishbutnotconsciousofit,entirelyabsorbedinanewoverwhelmingsensationoflifeandstrengththatsurgedupsuddenlywithinhim。Thissensationmightbecomparedtothatofamancondemnedtodeathwhohassuddenlybeenpardoned。Halfwaydownthestaircasehewasovertakenbythepriestonhiswayhome;Raskolnikovlethimpass,exchangingasilentgreetingwithhim。Hewasjustdescendingthelaststepswhenheheardrapidfootstepsbehindhim。Someoneovertookhim;itwasPolenka。Shewasrunningafterhim,calling“Wait!wait！”
Heturnedround。Shewasatthebottomofthestaircaseandstoppedshortastepabovehim。Adimlightcameinfromtheyard。
Raskolnikovcoulddistinguishthechild"sthinbutprettylittleface,lookingathimwithabrightchildishsmile。Shehadrunafterhimwithamessagewhichshewasevidentlygladtogive。